DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything from the Naruto universe.

Thinking (+ flashbacks, etc.)

Emphasis

Bijuu, etc. speaking

Bijuu, etc. thinking

Naru was getting incredibly frustrated.

Everyone was freaking out but how was this her fault? Her daddy was trying to "reason with" her, but what was she supposed to say? That she'd "lost control" of Kurama nii-san? That wasn't what happened at all! ...And Kurama had warned her about bad men that could (so would, he said,) twist saying such a thing so much that they'd lock her up forever.

Or maybe even take Kurama away, and screw that! She wasn't going to let that happen! Plus, it's not like she could or would ever "control" her big hairy brother.

"Old man," she said, shaking with her fists clenched, "I did not lose control, and you and dad wanting me to say that I did will not change the facts," she continued with steely blue eyes as she glared up at the Hokage.

Kakashi felt like he had been slapped. Since when did she call him anything other than "Daddy?!"

Naruto took a deep breath and looked at each of the adult idiots in front of her, almost wanting to let Kurama-nii chew on them a little so that they'd get over themselves. "I didn't lose control of 'the fox,' as you call him. I worked WITH the fox. And why am I the one in trouble when some fake ANBU guys tried to take me and other ones may already have Hashi-kun? What's wrong with fighting back to protect myself?!"

Tsunade stepped in front of the pouting, angry, adorable, (and absolutely correct) Naru-chan, poking the Hokage in the chest while reminding herself to hold back so that her finger didn't go straight through her geezer of a sensei's chest. "Yeah, Old Man, why in the hell is the gaki in trouble, when you know EXACTLY who those fake ANBU were!"

"Minato disbanded ROOT. Did you specifically allow Danzo to begin operations again?" Jiraiya asked incredulously. Seeing his sensei's "tell:" the way his blink lasted a little longer than normal while keeping a stupid blank face, set his blood boiling. "WHY? How could you be so stupid! Konoha is a military dictatorship and..."

"Do not forget that - and the fact that I am Hokage, Jiraiya," Hiruzen bit out as he also looked at both of the other adults that HE was supposed to be directing in the eye, reminding them of the same thing.

"We should hold an election," Naruto chirped. She had recently read about different forms of government and was curious about who would win! Kakashi pushed his extremely disquieting daughter behind him. "And who's Danzo?" she asked, peeking out from behind one of his legs.

Hiruzen took a deep breath then glared at his students. "Unless one of you two is willing to take The Hat, you will not question my decisions. Kakashi's too young at the moment." He was only a little satisfied that both Sannin looked at each other, questioning if the other would take the Hokage position, while Kakashi looked like he was ready to faint.

Hiruzen knew that he really was too damn old for this job, but nooooo... Minato had to go and sacrifice himself when Hiruzen could have done it just as well. Now he was stuck in a position that had too many responsibilities when he could be retired, fishing, and spending time with his grandchildren. One of whom had just substituted herself with Kakashi.

Kakashi let out a huff, trying to push his daughter behind him again. She was holding herself to the ground with her insane amount of chakra, so she proved abnormally resistant to what should be an easy task. "Naru, behave yourself," he whispered, bending down so she would hear. His daughter pouted at him but held her arms up to be held, making little grabby hands. He pulled her up to his waist and felt her go limp, her face sliding down to his chest, within a minute. Tsunade told him to keep her there while she ran an additional diagnostic on her.

"She's exhausted, but fully healed."

"Unbelievable," the Hokage said. "And thank the gods," he quickly added when he felt the Killing Intent of the three shinobi in front of him. "Kakashi, go back to the Senju compound. There are some things I need to discuss with my students. Jiraiya, accompany him but come straight back."

Kakashi didn't need to be told twice. He and Jiraiya sunshinned to the compound, going through the barrier seals before entering the manor and putting Naruto to bed. He sat down on the bed beside his worn-out daughter, still in filthy gear, and let out a sad sigh before Jiraiya spoke.

"Go shower and change, Kakashi-kun. I'll watch over the gaki and place more seals in here." Honestly, the number of seals in the Senju manor was getting ridiculous, but they could never be too sure, considering that not only was Orochimaru out there but so was fucking Danzo and his army of drones.

"I won't allow it, and you tricked us," Kakashi snarled at the Hokage the next afternoon.

Having been up all night again, Hiruzen was exhausted. Tsunade was still beside herself but had at least calmed down enough to listen to Shizune and stop destroying things, while Jiraiya looked like he was about to tear him to pieces although they'd discussed this. "She's Chunin level, Kakashi-kun. As you can see, she also completed the graduation test and even… Good Lord," he shook his head, turning Naru-hime's Academy test over, showing her writing all over the back of it. "She even explained why some of these questions were, and I quote, 'stupid,' while offering several reasonable alternatives that she believes all shinobi should know the answers to before entering the field."

"You want to put a girl that's barely six years old in ANBU," Kakashi scoffed. Jiraiya finally snapped and threw the couch he'd earlier been sitting on out of the Hokage's window. A scream was heard from below, but none of them really cared.

"It's to protect her, you brat," Hiruzen sighed. "She'll be directly under my control and Danzo won't be able to get his hands on her. He's already demanding her entry into ROOT," as well as her head, and may have Council support: those things he didn't need to say.

He'd sent Kakashi out on a nearby mission today while he'd kept little Naru in his office with Shizune all day, in order to better observe and test her. The girl was ready and willing to be a ninja, wanting to be "just like my Daddy and Papa," as she put it. "She's a kunoichi now, an adult in the eyes of the village."

"I can't believe you did this," Kakashi said under his breath, feeling lost as he gazed upon the picture of his sensei. He'd been a five-year-old Genin and a six-year-old Chunin, and look how much that screwed him up. "I thought you cared about her."

Hiruzen DID care about his granddaughter. Infuriated, he reminded himself that he needed the two shinobi in front of him alive. He would force The Hat on one of them - or Tsunade, which was almost a laughable idea - at some point in the future, plus the village was weak following the Kyuubi attack. That's why he put up with Danzo and his bullshit, he told himself. "I won't send her on any dangerous missions..."

"She'll be assigned to me," Kakashi said with clear defiance but resigned to his orders. For now.

"That's," the Hokage drawled, "not protocol. You're a family member."

"We have Inuzukas that are on the same team," Kakashi reminded the man. He knew everyone in ANBU! "Both sets of twins are assigned to their respective teams..."

Hiruzen waved his weathered hand through the smoke in front of him. "Fine. Let it be on your head."

Kakashi was struck mute at that, and radiated Killing Intent so foul it made even the Hokage flinch until Naru opened the hidden door that was behind his desk. The man also known as Inu felt his heart drop into his gut upon seeing the hitai-ate she was wearing. It was too big for her little head, so Naru was wearing it as a belt.

"Daddy look!" Naru said excitedly, pointing to her hitai-ate, "I'm just like you now!" The words made Kakashi fall back into the large chair he was in front of. "You're not proud of me?" the small girl asked in just over a whisper.

Kakashi held out his arms, needing comfort more than Naru probably did. "I'm always proud of you," he said, making her jump into his arms.

"I got somethin' to tell you," she whispered in his ear in a sing-song voice. That tone always meant trouble, Kakashi knew. "We need to go tell Drunken Granny!" She squealed when Kakashi picked her up and disappeared in a sunshin. They arrived in front of the home they'd soon be leaving. Naru excitedly ran inside. "Drunken Granny! Drunken Gran... Tsunade-shishou, look! I got somethin' to tell you," she shouted as she ran through the house.

She found her granny/shishou with her head on the dining room table and an empty bottle in one hand. It wasn't the first time Naru discovered the disguised old lady like that, so she pushed her up and climbed into her lap. "Look Granny, I'm a ninja now!"

"Wh - what?" Tsunade asked drunkenly.

Naru smiled broadly, showing off her missing teeth. "And Kurama-nii said we're gonna find Hashi-kun even though he says Hashi's a Mokuton brat but it's not his fault so he'll let him live!"

"Really?" Tsunade asked brokenly.

"Yeah, really! The old man says I'm gonna be ANBU!"

"WHAT?!"

A/N: Sorry this transitional chapter is so short. My family's dealing with COVID and I need to get tested for it again, too. Thank goodness we're all fully vaccinated, so it's not nearly as bad as it could be. It's mainly exhausting!

Y'all take care out there!