Chapter 5: Complicated
Peeta POV:
I make my way to the kitchen. What a strange morning? I grab a few ingredients from the pantry and start to prepare a simple dough. As I measure, mix, and knead the dough I think over this morning's occurrence, but none of my thoughts bring any sense to the events.
As I put the dough in the oven, I reflect on Katniss's eyes. The way they looked as she told me about her nightmare. I think about how. Her skin glowed in the dim lighting of my living room. I ponder over her shaking form, as she let out her pain through her sobs.
Finally, I remember the way she felt pressed against me. I can't help but find myself start. To picture that kiss. The fiery need I have for rises, as I imagine what could have happened if Katniss's mother had not come. The thoughts are overwhelming, and I struggle to push them aside.
Some time later, I pull out the freshly baked loafs of bread. Seven in total, for the few struggling families of the seam. I carefully wrap them and put them in a bag. Carefully, I walk outside. The temperature is cool today. I walk past the meadow beside the school and am delighted to see a few kids running and playing.
Walking past into the Seam I take advantage of the fact that most people have not woken up and leave the bread on the doorsteps of families that I know have been struggling. From Katniss I have learned that giving these breads to the families directly would probably only embarrass them. It is better for them to receive it this way.
After dropping of the bread, I make my way to the center of the town. There are a few early risers walking the street. I wave to the few people from the merchant families I know. I stop in front of the entrance of the bakery.
Shaking my head, I walk to the Bakery's back entrance. I knock three times. Rye, the oldest, answers the door. He seems surprised to see me, probably because I haven't come to the bakery in three weeks. Awkwardly, I make my way inside.
Katniss POV:
After the morning debacle, I avoid my mother. Every time I'm in the same room with her. I
remember Peeta and the desperate kisses we shared. I run away to the woods as soon as I can, just to be as far away as possible.
I spend most of my morning in the woods, hunting. Gale has started working in the mines so it's just me. It gives me time to think. My feelings for Peeta are so confusing they boggle my mind. I try to feel regret because I'm sure the kissing will hurt Peeta in some way. It does not work. I want to kiss him again. That realization bothers me. Does wanting Peeta mean that I love him? Can I love anybody? What even is love?
By the end of my hunt, I'm even more confused than before, but at least I have a dead rabbit. I drop the meat off at home and walk to the Hob. The Hob is the same as it was before I left for the games, which is comforting. I walk around and watch the regulars hassle with one another. I end up buying a few beads and ribbons for Prim and visit Greasy Sae. Her stew is nowhere near as luxurious as the one in the Capital but is far tastier.
After lunch, my mind wanders back to Peeta. I wonder where he is. Making my way towards the center I can't help but think he might be at the bakery. I stop outside it and look at the pretty frosted cakes on display. They're beautiful, but I'm sure that Peeta has not done them.
I stare at the cakes for a few more seconds. Maybe, I should buy something for Prim? As I'm contemplating whether or not I should enter the bakery Peeta comes around the back. "Katniss?" Peeta says questioningly. I turn towards him, but before I can make some excuse for presence one of Peeta's older brothers turn the corner.
"Peeta, you forgot-" He stops midway after spotting me. Peeta stretches his hand out towards him, who then drops a leather wallet into Peeta's hand. Peeta thanks him but he makes no move to leave.
"Need something Rye?" Peeta asks.
"Introduce me to your …. friend," Rye replies hesitantly.
I feel my face get hot at his words. Me and Peeta are a lot more than friends and for some reason I am reminded of this morning's interlude. I find it strange, Peeta knows my family so well, but this is the first time I have ever heard his brother speak.
"Katniss this is Rye, Rye this is Katniss," Peeta states in a matter-of-fact way.
"You should come have dinner with us sometime," Rye invites. I notice that his smile is like Peeta's. It makes me want to smile too, but I just nod awkwardly in response.
Peeta turns away from his brother and gently takes my hand. It is big and warm in mine. "Let's go home," he says warmly. We start walking hand in hand back to Victors Village.