Thanks to everyone who has been reading so far. If you're enjoying the story, I'd love to hear from you.
Chapter 6
(November 2007)
"This stinks," Anna said as she shoved her bag under the bus seat then sat by the window.
The crowded press bus was quiet. Granted, morning was most people's least favorite time of day but inevitably some early bird was spouting off about new developments in the Middle East or the latest internet company. Otherwise, people slept or quietly pecked at their laptops. Today everyone was digesting the announcement.
Single or married, they'd all been looking forward to the upcoming four-day Thanksgiving break. Most had finalized their holiday plans back in August.
All of those arrangements had to be cancelled now, only three weeks before the holiday.
At their briefing this morning, it was announced there was a last-minute schedule change. Barack's team felt it was important for them to attend a rally in Atlanta, Georgia that was being held the day after Thanksgiving.
The four-day holiday break was history.
Barack had apologized profusely, explaining he'd made arrangements to cater them an elaborate Thanksgiving dinner and that he appreciated the sacrifices they were making. His family and some other politicians would be joining them so at least it would be an opportunity for networking.
"They're not going to remember me." Anna murmured to herself, burying her face behind her raised knees.
Rory had never seen her like this. For the past months, Anna's non-nonsense attitude had sustained her. She'd been the ultimate cheerleader, taking Rory to task if she started moping around. Even though Rory was equally disappointed, now it was time for her to step up.
"That's not true. Christmas isn't that far away. And won't the tour be in Chicago in the middle of December anyway?"
"Yeah, that's true," Anna said in a monotone.
"Did you tell Steve about Skype?" Rory and Logan had started using it. "That way you'll be able to see the kids on the computer screen, and they'll make more of a connection with you. I'll help you with it tonight. Just make sure Stephen installs the program on his computer."
"Yeah, that is a good idea," Anna said, slightly encouraged.
"They don't have to see you every day to know that you love them."
Anna cringed as Rory recited her own words back to her.
Anticipating Anna's response, Rory insisted. "No, really. My mom and I didn't spend every minute together and we have a great relationship."
"That's true." Anna leaned back against the seat and closed her eyes
"I really wanted to see my mom," Rory said, more to herself, feeling guilty to be complaining.
"You could always quit earlier than you planned." Anna suggested.
There were three weeks left until Thanksgiving. And then she was only working one additional week.
Sensing Rory didn't want to do that, Anna opened her eyes and reminded her. "You're going to need some time to get settled in San Francisco. Find a doctor. See what the hospital is like. Set up the nursery. Believe me, you don't want to rush those things. You won't have the energy to catch up after the baby's born."
Having said her piece, Anna settled her head against the window, once again trying to sleep.
Should Rory stop working sooner than she'd planned?
Would a month really make a difference?
Something visceral twisted within her– she didn't want to quit early. She was enjoying the job and finally feeling like she was getting good at it. After Mitchum Huntzberger's cruel assessment had thrown her for a tailspin, she craved this validation that she was indeed on the correct career path. She hated the idea of leaving her job.
Of course, living out of a suitcase was getting tiresome and she missed Logan. Skyping and texting weren't the same as being together, especially since they were frequently in different time zones. But moving to San Francisco would be a new chapter in her life. One she wasn't fully prepared to face.
Besides, she needed to complete this chapter first.
Was she ready to be a mom?
Academically she could handle anything. A voracious reader, she'd research most subject matters. She could easily meet those types of challenges. But babies? There were parenting books, but babies didn't come with individualized instructions. They were cute but she hadn't had much experience being the primary caregiver or, for that matter, even babysitting.
If only she could have the baby in Stars Hollow with Lane and her mother by her side to help her.
But that scenario didn't allow for her to have a husband to share her life or much in the way of exciting job opportunities.
Having adult choices and responsibilities was more complicated than she'd imagined.
XXXX
By the end of the week, Anna and Rory opened the door to their hotel room in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. Located on the outskirts of town, the popular chain motel had seen better days. The loud floral print carpet in the hallway was faded. The room was small. And the bed pillows even smaller. An odd odor permeated the atmosphere, reminiscent of pine air freshener with a hint of mold.
Rory stretched out on one of the lumpy beds while Anna reached for her laptop.
"What are you doing?" Rory asked. While they'd just attended the press event, they'd have a day or so before their stories were due.
"I'm getting my story done. Tonight."
"What's the rush?" Rory yawned. She was exhausted. Then again, she was always exhausted.
"Don't you want to shop for maternity clothes tomorrow?"
It was tempting. Rory's grandmother had purchased some for her while they were in Saint Louis together. But they were more professional. Some dress pants and tops. Two dresses. Even a larger pair of flats to accommodate her expanding feet. Good for work but it would be nice to have more casual clothes for relaxing.
Anna leaned towards her. "Tell, you what. Let's finish our articles tonight. Then tomorrow, on our day off, we'll have a girl's day. Sleep in. Go for brunch. Get mani-pedis. Get haircuts. Find a maternity clothing store."
As tired as she was, it sounded tempting. Rory rose to extract her computer from her bag.
The next morning, after the luxury of sleeping in until nine thirty, the girls stepped out of their motel. Although it was the beginning of November and getting colder every day, the sun was shining brightly.
Standing in the parking lot, surveying the local area, they weren't impressed. It was a typical highway road stop. There were several gas stations, motels and chain restaurants such KFC, Taco Bell, McDonalds. And an Ace hardware. No nail salons or clothing stores to be seen.
Rory turned to go back to the room to look up places on her laptop but Anna stopped her.
"First, food. How about Denny's?"
Denny's was only a few feet away. A walk across the parking lot. Brunch sounded appealing so they headed over.
Considering it was a Saturday morning, the restaurant was relatively empty. Rather than seating them up front, where there were plenty of vacant tables, the lanky, acne-faced host insisted they follow him to the backroom.
Feeling uncomfortable, Rory was tempted to joke about being led to a dank basement then kidnapped, but she didn't think the awkward teenager would appreciate it.
When they stepped into the room, they were greeted with a thunderous, "Surprise!"
"Oh my God!" Rory cried.
The large rectangular table was crowded with friends and family from Stars Hollow. Luke, Sookie, Mrs. Kim, Lane, Miss Patty, Babette, Gypsy and Kirk. Lorelai rushed forward to throw her arms around her and squeeze her daughter tightly.
"Mom! It's so good to see you! What're you doing here?"
"When we heard you weren't coming home for Thanksgiving, we had to do something," Babette said.
Miss Patty continued. "Especially since you're moving to San Francisco and won't be home for a long time."
Lorelai said, "We wanted to have a Thanksgiving meal but the timing didn't work. We threw this together fast. We're having a celebration Thanksgiving/Baby Shower/Brunch."
After getting Anna to confess that she'd been in on this, Rory introduced her to everyone. Then she made her rounds about the table, greeting and hugging each person. Mrs. Kim had borrowed the church bus. She and Luke had taken turns driving all night to get there. The group had arrived only a few hours earlier. They'd rented one motel room and had taken turns resting and freshening up.
Lane squealed with delight when she saw Rory. Examining her belly, she said, "Nope, you're not even close to as big as I was."
Sookie and Gypsy also had to pat her stomach, feeling for baby kicks. Rory was starting to feel like community property.
"Mimosas, anyone?" Miss Patty produced a bottle of champagne which she generously poured into several glasses of orange juice. She glared at the young waiter, daring him to object.
"Isn't it a bit early for that?" Rory said.
"Are you kidding? They've been drinking the entire trip. Why do you think I insisted on helping with the driving?" Luke said.
When Miss Patty's bottle ran out, she assured the crowd. "Don't worry. I brought plenty more."
"The church bus has become a party bus?" Rory asked Lane.
"Not in the traditional sense," Lane said.
Conversations paused while menus were studied and orders placed.
"This is amazing. You had less than a week to figure this out." Rory was impressed.
"You know us in Stars Hollow. We always find a way," Gypsy said.
"Kirk, what are you doing here?" Rory asked, looking across the table towards him.
A baby shower and Luke were an odd enough combination. She could understand Luke wanting to see her. Over the years he'd been just as much of a father to her as Christopher had. Maybe even more so. And Luke would also want to support Lorelai.
But Kirk?
"Lulu was supposed to come but she wasn't feeling well. She insisted I take her place."
Mrs. Patty and Babette exchanged amused glances as they downed their mimosas.
"Where's Grandma and Grandpa?" Rory feared the rift between her mother and her grandparents hadn't fully healed.
"Can you imagine my parents driving all night with nine people in the church bus?" Lorelai laughed. Noticing her daughter's concerned expression, she assured her. "I invited them. They decided to fly and will be joining us soon."
Rory was relieved.
When the food arrived, people prepared to dig in. Sookie and Luke examined the offerings critically. Eggs were runny and the toast was burnt. Pancakes were flat with charred edges.
"No. Stop! Put the silverware down!" Sookie demanded. She glared at Kirk who clung to his fork.
"Now!"
His fork dropped with a clang.
"Everybody, we are not eating this. Give us a few minutes."
Sookie was offended by the low quality of the food. She nodded towards Luke and the two of them headed towards the kitchen.
Rory asked, "So what does one do at a spur of the moment Thanksgiving/Baby Shower/Brunch?"
Seated beside her daughter, Lorelai explained. "We share a meal – thus the Thanksgiving part. The baby shower part was trickier. Between alcohol, snacks and people, we couldn't fit much more in the church van. And how would you get a stroller back to San Francisco anyway? Some of us have smaller gifts and others took photos of larger items that we're getting for you. We'll have them shipped to your apartment."
"Thanks. This is just so kind of all of you to go out of your way for me." Rory said, wiping the ever-present tears from her cheeks. She'd given up fighting to hold them back.
"Tell her about the games," Babette said, excited.
All looked towards Lorelai, who explained. "Well, we're not going to be able to do the classic decorate a onesie or diaper content or weighing contest. Or the infamous bow and ribbon hat. Each person is going share mothering advice and a name suggestion. I told them you liked the idea of an old-fashioned name that might have an informal nickname and possibly one connected with a famous author."
"Oh, that sound wonderful!"
They chatted within the group until Sookie and Luke appeared with waiters bearing new plates filled with much more appetizing fare. Fluffy Belgium waffles, French toast garnished with fresh fruit and a dusting of powdered sugar. Omelets neatly folded with a touch a cheese, bacon and mushrooms.
Lorelai dinged her glass with a fork to get everyone's attention.
"Ok, first of all, excellent job with the food. Let's hear it for Sookie and Luke!"
Everyone clapped and some shouted. "Here! Here!"
"And a massive thank-you to Mrs. Kim who borrowed the church bus and drove us most of the way here. And Luke too."
Loud whistling and clapping commenced.
Anna's cheeks were flushed, but Rory explained. "You get used to it."
Lorelai continued to officiate. Raising her glass, she said, "To Miss Patty and Babette, for providing the champagne."
"Keep it coming!" Gypsy said.
"And to all of you for dropping everything last minute to come here to…this. It just means so much to me." Rory said, raising her glass.
After people clinked glasses as best they could, some reaching out far over the table, Lorelai proclaimed, "Let the festivities commence!" She dug into her waffles.
Kirk volunteered to go first. "Lulu and I are sending you a case of diapers, so I didn't bring them today. While I have no experience rearing children, other than occasionally being harassed by them, Rory, I tell you, be firm. Don't be afraid to use the rod if you have to. No one likes an unruly child."
Lorelai and Sookie stifled their giggles while Anna's brow furrowed deeply. Lorelai interpreted Kirk's words as a challenge so she made paper balls from discarded straw wrappers then randomly flicked them at Kirk as he spoke.
"I took the liberty of looking up names of several famous writers." Kirk pulled out a memo pad, while glaring at Lorelai. "Flannery O'Connor, Emily Bronte, Harriet Tubman, Harper Lee, Sylvia Plathe- "
Gypsy objected. "Hey, we're only supposed to make one suggestion. He's hogging the spotlight!"
"My turn!" Babette said. "Music is a huge part of my life. Maury and I are sending you our favorite jazz CDs. It's good for the baby's brain too.
"You all know my baby was Cinnamon. She liked the Fancy Feast brand cat food, served in a glass bowl, never a plastic one. Learned that one the hard way. And boy she'd let you know it if you hadn't cleaned it right. She liked to be brushed but only right after she ate." Gypsy's puzzled expression led her to say. "My point? Oh, yeah. Details, pay attention to those details.
"Lorelai said you liked the dignity of older names and wanted something unique. My suggestion is Tallulah. What an actress. What a legacy."
Miss Patty nodded firmly, in agreement.
"Look who's here!" Lorelai said.
The host ushered in Emily and Richard, along with Paris. Rory leapt up to greet them.
Paris critically eyed Rory's expanding middle. "My god, look at you Gilmore. Or should I say Huntzberger? What have you put on, eighty pounds?"
"I'll answer to either name. It's great to see you." Rory said, ignoring Paris' usual lack of tact. "Thanks so much for coming."
After getting the newcomers settled with food and mimosas, the festivities continued.
Paris took charge. Standing, she announced. "I can't stay long. I've got exams coming up and all the parts of the circulatory, respiratory, and excretory systems to memorize. I'll be studying my flash cards on the plane.
"First, Rory, my gift to the baby is Baby Einstein DVDs. Not that your kid won't be smart with that gene pool, but why not get a head start?
"For baby advice…from what I've learned at med school, don't plan on getting anything done for the first three months after the baby's born. It's essentially the fourth trimester for you. Your hormones will be a mess. You won't be getting any sleep. You'll feel like hell."
Anna looked cautiously towards Rory.
"As to a name, you need something solid, something regal. Something people will take seriously. Something like Sterling. Or Hollis."
"Thank you, Paris. How about we hear from an actual mom next?" Lorelai suggested. "How about you, Anna?"
Anna paused, thinking. Then she said, "Don't expect to do everything yourself. Don't be afraid to lean on others for help.
"Amen, sister!" Lane lifted her hand in a virtual high five from across the table. Anna raised her palm in response.
"I know you won't be by family and close friends. But Logan will be there. Be sure to let him know exactly what you need. Over time you'll make new friends in San Francisco. Joining a mother's group is a great way to start.
"My name suggestion, Virginia. From the feminist writer, Virginia Woolf."
"What are your children's names and ages?" Emily asked.
"Colton is four and Emma is six."
Gypsy presented several tie-dyed neon-colored onesies. She recommended bringing the baby in for frequent tune ups. With a giggle, she suggested Hortense as a baby name.
When Miss Patty suggested the name Petunia, Rory suspected they'd been having a little too much fun (and alcohol) on the church bus last night. Her advice, dancing lessons, start her young. Poise will take a woman far in life. Her gift: a ballet skirt, for when she starts dance class. And free dance lessons for a month.
"Why are we assuming the baby's going to be a girl? Luke asked.
"Your turn!" Lorelai shouted gleefully, ignoring his question.
Clearing his throat, Luke said, "I haven't been a parent for long, but I'd just be sure to be there for them. Lorelai has a picture of the stroller we're sending you. For a name, Claire."
"I don't think that meets the criteria. " Kirk pointed out while Luke scowled at him.
Miss Pattie encouraged Luke. "Tell us why."
"It was my mom's name. And for a boy-" The audience razzed him but Luke stood his ground. "If it's a boy, Michael."
Sookie said, "Goody it's my turn! Rory, Jackson and I are giving you a mini-food processor. It's wonderful for making baby food. And so much better for the baby than store-bought. For advice, I'd say, be sure to accompany your husband to the doctor when he says he's getting a vasectomy!"
All laughed while Emily mumbled to Richard. "I don't understand."
"And for the name suggestion, Violette."
"You can't be serious. That's a terrible choice – that's the name of the kid that blows up and turns into a blueberry in Willy Wonka. You'd be setting your kid up for a lifetime of teasing," Paris said.
"We didn't criticize your choice." Sookie responded, slightly defensive.
Trying to defuse the situation and redirect the crowd, Lorelai said, "Mrs. Kim, why don't you go next?"
"My advice would be to take care of yourself. You can't take care of the baby if you're not healthy. I'm sending you a breast pump. Mother's milk is best for the baby and breast feeding helps you regain your figure. For a name, Ruth. A solid biblical name. You can't go wrong there."
All eyes shifted towards Lane, seated beside her mother.
"Guess it's my turn. Hemp Alien will be making you a mix tape of original children's songs. The stuff that's out there for kids is pretty terrible. Zach's hoping to get some side business doing kid's music. Though we'll probably record under a different band name.
"My advice, it's not going to be perfect. Don't even try for that. And the name-"
A huge grin crept over her face.
Rory realized what she was going to say and they shouted it simultaneously.
"Felicity Willow Topanga!"
It was a name Rory and Lane came up when they were younger, based on their favorite TV show characters.
"That leaves us, Mom and Dad. Do you want to go first?" Lorelai asked.
Richard said, "First we'd like to thank you all for inviting us. We're delighted to be here. Rory, we'd like to buy you a crib. We're going to leave the catalogues with you so you can pick out the one you like best. Then we'll take care of ordering and arranging to have it delivered and assembled for you."
Emily said, "We didn't know about the format for your party so let me think. Parenting advice?" After pausing, she said, "It's okay if she turns out much different than you expected."
Lorelai's eyes flashed.
"For a name suggestion, Eliza. From My Fair Lady. Aubrey Hepburn is always a woman to emulate."
Lorelai said, "Okay, I get to finish! Luke already told you we're getting you a stroller. It comes with a car seat that snaps into the base. That ought to be handy. For advice, never be afraid to do things your way. And the name suggestion-"
She cackled evilly. "Mildred"
"I don't understand these names," Emily said to Richard. "They can't serious. Most of them are horrible."
Miss Patty said, "Mildred Pierce, the Joan Crawford movie. There was powerful woman, I tell you."
"I'd be happy to arrange for any gifts to be shipped to Rory and Logan." Emily volunteered.
"Thanks so much Grandma."
XXXX
Lorelai tossed the final Hershey's kiss at Rory's head then pitched the empty cellophane bag onto the floor. The bed they were lounging on was littered with crumpled foil wrappers.
"When do you have to go?" Rory asked, settling against her mother's shoulder, while letting the chocolate melt in her mouth.
"Mrs. Kim wants to leave at six p.m., sharp." Lorelai clipped her words, mimicking the Korean woman.
"Isn't the trip only eight hours?"
"In theory. However, that doesn't take in account traffic, road construction, misreading or just plain missing road signs, or Miss Patty and Babette's tiny bladders. Mrs. Kim wants the bus returned before six a.m. tomorrow."
Rory dug into the bag of snacks her mother had brought. Luke must've snuck in the container of granola and dried fruit. He tended to lecture her on nutrition, especially now that she was pregnant. Continuing to explore the contents of the bag, she was delighted to discover Twizzlers. After ripping the bag open, she offered some to Lorelai, who grabbed a handful. A movie was playing on the television but it only served as background. Neither were paying much attention to it.
"How are you and Grandma getting along?"
Rory had been half afraid to ask. She sensed some tension between them at the shower.
Lorelai sat up, becoming more animated. "I thought we were getting along. Then she pulls this, 'Don't be disappointed if she turns out to be freak.'" She mocked her mother's tone and made a severe face.
"She didn't say that!"
"She did!"
"I was right there. She was smiling. She meant it as a complement."
"If so, it was a back-handed compliment."
Rory continued to defend her grandmother. "She didn't have the entire bus ride and eight people for bouncing ideas. It was totally off the cuff. She was smiling when she said it. No snarky tone at all. You're reading too much into this."
"Maybe." Changing the subject, Lorelai asked, "How are you?"
"I'm…a little nervous." She started peeling a Twizzler. "I've been so busy with the job, I haven't really thought about becoming a mom. Am I terrible?"
Lorelai placed a hand on her forearm, reassuring her. "You'll have plenty of time for that, don't worry."
"Mom, I've barely spent any time even thinking of baby names. Is that normal?"
Grabbing the bag to remove a package of chocolate covered marshmallow cookies, Lorelai said, "Who cares about normal?"
Trying to lighten the mood, Rory joked. "By the way, maybe out of spite I'll name the baby Mildred."
Lorelai feigned shock. "You wouldn't! We can call her 'Dred' for short." She snorted with laughter then told her daughter. "I'm not gonna lie to you, it's gonna be a big adjustment, Rory. Huge changes. But you'll take things one day at a time. You'll be okay."
Settling back against several wadded up small pillows, Rory said, "It was so great to see everyone. I can't believe how many people came."
She thought about how fortunate she was to have so many people in her life that cared for her.
"How are you and Luke doing?"
"Pretty good." Lorelai was focused on unwrapping the cookie packaging.
"Even after the disaster at Friday night dinner in September?"
"Yeah"
"You hesitated." Rory accused.
"No I didn't." Lorelai rapidly replied.
Rory sensed her mother wasn't being completely honest. "So you've talked about everything then? You finally discussed why you cancelled your wedding and then married Dad?"
Lorelai rose, on the pretense of throwing the plastic wrapping into the trash, though she deliberately stepped over the other cellophane and foil wrappers littering the floor. Once she returned, she perched on the edge of the bed.
"Kinda."
"What do you mean, kinda? You either did or you didn't." Rory wanted her mother's relationship with Luke to succeed this time. They were good for each other.
"We're getting along well. It's a fresh start. I don't want to mess things up."
Feeling more like the parent, Rory explained. "Dad's always gonna be part of our lives. You can't avoid that. You're going to have to deal with this eventually. And sooner is better than later.
"Mom, have you two even talked about marriage again?
With more conviction, Lorelai answered, "No. I put too much pressure on him last time. I'm convinced it was mostly my idea. I pushed him too hard. This time, if it happens, it has to be his idea."
"Don't you think it would be okay to drop a hint that you might be open to that? This is Luke we're talking about."
XXXX
Although it was three in the afternoon, Lorelai was clad in flannel PJs and a faded concert T-shirt. She'd also grabbed one of Luke's flannel shirts for additional warmth. Mrs. Kim had dropped them off around four thirty that morning. Although they'd dozed on the bus, both were exhausted. Unfortunately, they couldn't fall back asleep.
Lorelai stumbled about the kitchen, searching for coffee. Noting that Luke, who was equally out of it, was already monitoring the percolating coffee maker, she moved towards the living room. Observing the flashing light of the answering machine, Lorelai hit the button to listen to the messages. Three messages in, Christopher's voice filled the room.
At that moment Luke happened to be walking by with a cup of coffee. She could swear he winced at the sound of his voice. After listening to the messages, she poured her own cup of coffee and joined Luke on the front porch.
She tried to dismiss it. Luke didn't care about Christopher. That was all in the past. Afterall she'd chosen him. However, even though she was fatigued, she couldn't deny that she'd seen that small flash of hurt in Luke's eyes and the tightening of his jaw. This was lousy timing. But they needed to get this out into the open.
Sitting across from him on a wicker chair, she took a large sip of coffee then said, "That was Christopher, wanting to know what to buy Rory for a baby gift."
"Oh." Luke acted casual.
Warming her hands on her coffee mug, she said, "It's nice that he's stepping up more for her these days."
"Yeah." He starred into the yard.
She could let this go. Maybe it was enough. She'd mentioned his name. It was a start. But Rory was right. It would be better to resolve these issues.
"Ask me anything you want to know about Christopher."
Luke's eyes widened. After considering it, he asked, "Why?"
She stood up and paced about the porch. That was a loaded question. It could mean so many things. She chose to start with why she'd married Christopher.
"Christopher was my first love. We've known each other forever. We have a kid together. And somehow, in the back of my mind, the idea of Christopher was always there. He always wanted me. Our timing was just off."
"Like after Sookie's wedding when you found out Sherry was pregnant?"
Flabbergasted, she said, "You knew? How?"
"How do you think I knew? Babette's your neighbor. She and Miss Patty eat at the diner every other day. It's gossip central."
"I didn't think you listened to that stuff."
"Only when it's about people I care about."
"Then why did you ask?"
"I wanted to hear if from you."
She considered what else Luke might want to know. She sat down beside him.
"You know, Christopher was only the rebound guy, right?"
"What does that mean?"
She hoped he wouldn't be offended. She was having trouble looking him in the eye.
"The rebound guy is the guy you go to because the man you love with all your soul has broken your heart. The rebound guy worships the ground you walk on. He'll do anything for you. When your heart is shattered, that feels pretty good."
"Why did you need a rebound guy?"
This was hard to put into words. She didn't want to hurt Luke. But she needed to acknowledge her feelings.
Her voice became hoarse as she explained. "I was hurt that you hid April from me. I knew something was off even before that, but I couldn't figure it out. I didn't want to pry. Once you told me about her, I thought that I could be okay with it. That I could respect your decisions. And I tried. I really did. I pretended I was okay when deep down inside, I wasn't. I kept swallowing those feelings until it all kinda built up and exploded.
"It wasn't right for me to put that kind of pressure on you – insisting we get married right at that moment. I know that now. You don't work well under those circumstances. I even knew that then, but I was past the point of caring. I was desperate. I felt like you didn't want me anymore. And Christopher did."
He grabbed her hand. "I'm sorry. I know I handled things badly. I have trouble focusing when there's more than one major issue. I had no idea that I had a kid. I didn't know how to be a dad. It really threw me for loop. I didn't want to let April down. I felt like I'd lost so much time already. I had to make up for that."
Meeting his eyes, she replied. "I know. The fact that you care so much about being a good dad means a lot to me. It's part of what makes you so special."
"Maybe you can join me when I fly out to New Mexico to visit April."
"Won't Anna object? We're not even engaged anymore."
"Maybe we'll have to change that."
Lorelai smiled. "Only when you're ready. I can wait."
She settled against his chest.