"Nothing fits!" Emily snapped, angrily throwing a pair of slacks down before sinking to her knees and burying her face in her hands. Her clothes littered the floor as she desperately looked for anything that she could wear. Even bloated, her pants and skirts - including those that had been too tight - hung off her hips unless clinched to the point of bunching with a belt. Her blouses hung loosely over her frame, and her dresses were too baggy. Hell, even her bras and underwear were too large these days.

Steve chuckled from his spot on the bed. It took everything in her not to grab one of her heels and fling it at his head. Perhaps realizing this, he appeared in the doorway. "What about that..." he trailed off, raising an eyebrow at what had been their organized closet. "I like what you've done with the place."

"I will murder you in your sleep," she stated, digging her fingers into her closed eyes until she saw stars.

"I'll make sure to keep one eye open." His deadpan delivery made her laugh, and she opened her eyes to see him standing in front of her, extending a hand to help her up. She took it with a sigh and allowed him to pull her into the kitchen, where he lifted her onto one of the counters. The marble was cold against her bare legs. After handing her a glass of wine, he stood between her thighs, planting his hands on either side of her. "Talk to me."

Tears gathered in her eyes and Em leaned back, blinking up at the ceiling, and blew out a breath. "Jesus Christ, I haven't had PMS this bad since I was a teenager."

"You sure it's that? And not stress?"

"Probably a bit of both," she admitted before taking a sip of her wine, her eyes darting to meet his and then away.

"What can I do?"

"Nothing." Steve huffed and cupped her cheek, gently guiding her to look at him. Fighting against every urge to move away, Emily leaned into his touch. "There's nothing you can do, mon coeur. It's just…" she huffed and leaned forward to rest her forehead against his. "I'm nervous about tomorrow."

It took everything in him not to assure her that it'd be fine. "What time's the meeting?"

"Ten-thirty."

"So plenty of time for us to get you a new outfit in the morning."

"I'm gonna need a whole new wardrobe," she groaned and shook her head. Before… before, she'd wanted to lose weight but dropping almost thirty pounds overnight hadn't been the plan.

"Later. But for tomorrow we just need one outfit. Which we can get, and then go to ESU."

"Babe, I love you, but you coming to the meeting about me lying on my resume about working with you isn't going to help anything. And I'd like to keep my job if I can." It was Steve's turn to shake his head, and he pulled away to look her in the eye.

"I'll wait outside the room."

"You'll make it worse."

"In your office."

"No."

"Outside the building?"

"Where more people will see you? No." He let out a growl of frustration that shot right through her and clenched his jaw.

"Fine. But you're taking security." Rather than answer, Em finished her drink and placed a hand on his chest, gently pushing him away so she could stand. Every inch of her body was pressed against his, and she smirked up at him.

"Hey JARVIS?"

"Yes, Dr. Harthorn? Or shall I call you Dr. Harthorn-Rogers?"

"Let's just go with Emily," she said, grabbing her husband's hand and towing him to the living room. "Would you mind playing my feel-good playlist?"

"Of course." A song with an upbeat tempo started to play over the speakers. She let go of his hand and started to sway, swinging her hips and singing along while stepping around the boxes containing their wedding gifts.

"You're not changing the subject," Steve said even as his eyes dragged up her legs, settling on her ass that peaked out from under her button-down when she threw her hands over her head.

"Course not." She looked over her shoulder and saw him watching her as she went onto her toes and bounced to the beat.

"You're taking security."

"Mmhmm." Em tugged at her hair tie and fluffed her hair as it fell from the bun. His hands closed on her hips and drew her back against him. She could feel his dick twitch as she continued to dance, trying to lose herself in the music. When the song ended and 'Mamma Mia' started, she grabbed his hand and spun away before turning to face him while singing along. A reluctant smile slowly appeared on his mouth as he watched her.

The world seemed to spin, and she quickly closed her eyes, concentrating on her breathing and the feeling of the water beating down on her back. "Sweetheart? You alright?"

"No," she groaned, blindly reaching out a hand. Steve caught it and squeezed, gently pulling her up and stepping closer to guide her forehead to his shoulder.

"Just breathe through it. Doc said the morning sickness should end soon, remember?"

"Morning sick - " Em started to say before clapping a hand to her mouth to keep from vomiting. Her head throbbed nastily, pulsing in time with her accelerating heartbeat. Tears welled in her eyes as she tried to push away the images flooding her mind. His arm brushed her side when he reached behind her to turn the water temperature down to lukewarm.

"You wanna sit down? Or put your head on the tiles? They're still pretty cool."

Emily opened her eyes, and they skated down the length of his body to focus on the strangely familiar white porcelain tub they stood in. Her eyes slammed shut again as she slowly straightened, trying not to rely too heavily on the stabilizing hold on her waist. On the count of three, she forced her eyes open again and keened. Only his arms around her kept her on her feet as her knees gave out.

Her ears rang and she blinked rapidly, hoping that she would wake up from this nightmare where the Steve that held her had hair too long. He was due for a trip to the barber, unwilling to even humor her gentle teasing that he would look good with a pompadour like they'd seen on their last trip out to Los Angeles to visit Howard.

He held her tightly to him, and she could feel the slight swell of her stomach pressing against his as he murmured into her hair, his free hand stroking the length of her spine. Em could easily recall the awed expression on his face when she'd told him that she was pregnant and laughing as she gently brushed away the tears from his cheeks. "It's alright, Sweetheart. It's okay, we'll get through this, it's just - "

"No," she breathed, cutting him off as she pushed weakly against him. The memory of coming out of the office and seeing Steve leaning against a car, wearing his dress uniform and very pale a year after she'd lost him, knocked the breath out of her. Em's nails dug into his back as her mouth flooded with saliva, reliving an echo of the disbelief that she'd be able to spend the rest of her life with her miraculously alive husband. "This isn't real. I'm hallucinating, this isn't - "

"Are you - " She shoved him away and turned, vomiting bile into the drain. Drops of blood swirled in the water, and she reached up to swipe at her nose. As soon as the mess washed away, he reached for the knob and turned off the water before gently taking her arm and turning her around. "What's going on?"

"Please tell me this isn't real, Steve," she pleaded."Tell me that I'm not back."

Mamma Mia here I go again. My, my how can I resist you?

The bedroom light was off, but she could see him sitting on the edge of Patrick's bed, his hand resting lightly on his chest as he listened for the telltale wheezing. The door creaked slightly when she pushed it open and met his gaze. "Bring him," she whispered. "I'll get Charlotte."

With their two sleeping children between them in their bed, he reached over them and rested his hand on her hip, his thumb lightly pressing against her stomach. Their third, angry at this intrusion into their already restricted space, kicked back. She trapped his hand against the baby as it twisted, hoping to pull him out of the memories that made tears shine on his cheeks and drip onto the pillow. "I saw him."

"Were you able to… stop it?"

"No." Steve closed his eyes and pressed his lips into a firm line before grunting. "He's still a sniper." Unable to think of anything to say, Emily pushed up onto an elbow and ran her fingers across his forehead before tracing his ear and cupping his cheeks. Her thumb rasped on his stubble.

"Look at me, mon coeur." When she could see his pale eyes in the moonlight, she breathed out a sigh. "You didn't know. You couldn't have known that he would survive it. And you've been looking - "

"He didn't even recognize me."

Yes, I've been broken hearted, blue since the day we -

"I'd like your blessing to marry your daughter," William stated. Em gave him an encouraging smile when his eyes darted to meet hers before turning to Steve, who studied the man in front of him. She knew he didn't want their little girl marrying into SHIELD. He didn't want her to have the constant anxiety of yet another person she loved involved in such a dangerous life. Between her father, brother, uncles, and aunt, Charlotte had grown up worrying about her family as soon as she was old enough to realize what they did. Only David, their youngest, seemed interested in a different path; he was looking at law schools to apply to.

But since the moment she'd met him, their Lottie Mae had been gone on William. Steve frowned, "I don't - "

"Of course," she cut him off. "Of course we give you our blessing."

Sad about the things that you do -

"Meet your Grammy," Patrick said, gently placing his son in her arms. He beamed with pride, his eyes darting from her to Steve, who stared awestruck down at their first grandchild. Bucky grinned and slung his arm around his shoulders.

"Who'd a thought, Punk?" he grinned.

His grip was tight on her waist, his eyes wide as he stared down at her. "No! I'm not losing you! Stay with me, Emily, please!"

" - a good life," Steve said, his hand tightly gripping her age-spotted one as they swayed in their kitchen. She looked up and felt the familiar twinge of grief that her husband continued to look so young while she withered away. Her grandfather's formula had been a blessing because it had kept him alive after the crash, but the cellular regeneration meant that he and Buck -

"EMILY!" Wild blue eyes held her own and -

" - heart, don't - "

"No, damn it, NO! Stay with me!"

OOO

There was an annoying beeping sound and something resting on her cheek. Blindly, she reached up to pull it away, her nails dragging down her face only to have her hand caught.

"Leave it." The order made her slowly open her eyes to meet Steve's worried gaze. Em bolted upright and gasped as her muscles protested loudly. Her eyes darted over the room before landing on him again. A loud, rapid beeping drew her attention to the heart monitor she was hooked up to, the adhesive peeking out the top of the hospital gown she wore. Shaking off his hold, she held up her hands, quickly looking up her firm skin, and let out a shaky breath.

"Look at me, Sweetheart," Steve said softly. "You with me?" When she nodded, he let out a sigh. "You scared the shit out of me, Emily."

"What happened?" she asked, grimacing while lying back down. Her fingers twisted in the blanket as she tried to slow her heart. When her muscles spasmed, Em tensed, and he grabbed her hand to squeeze lightly.

"Jane and Tony were messing with the machine and you… were there and not."

"How long…"

"JARVIS said it was just a couple of minutes. How long was it… where did you… were you…?" There was a soft tapping noise before the door opened, and a man stepped inside.

"Hey Dr. Harthorn, glad to see you're awake. You gave us a bit of a scare when Captain Rogers carried you in. He said you fainted in the living room and hit your head." Steve squeezed her hand and shot her a sidelong look. "How are you feeling?"

"Sore," she said after a moment.

"I bet. Mind if I check that bump on the back of your head?" He did a quick exam and took another look at her chart before smiling at them. "Your EKG is clear, pulse ox is back in the normal range, and I didn't see anything of concern in your labs. You're a bit dehydrated and have a minor vitamin D deficiency. Still, it looks like this was probably a vasovagal syncope. If you're feeling okay, I'll get the discharge rolling so you can get out of here. And, uh… Mr. Stark's in the hall if you want me to let him in."

"No."

"Yes." She shot Steve a look and nodded at the doctor. "Please, I'd like to talk to him." With a smile, he exited and motioned Tony and Jane inside.

"Are you alright?" Jane asked as soon as the door was closed.

"What happened?" Tony demanded. Emily stared at the two scientists and grit her teeth, blinking hard against the tears gathering in her eyes.

"Sweetheart," Steve said softly when her nails dug into his palm.

"How could you?" she hissed. "Do you know how fucking terrifying that was? To see all of that?"

"All of what?" Tony asked.

"I'm sorry, Em," Jane whispered. "Last time we turned it on, this didn't - "

"Last time?" Steve snapped. "You've turned it on before?"

"While you were in Maine. We've been trying to figure out what happened and - "

"I'm going to throw it off the damn building," he growled. "It's finished, Jane. Tear it apart - "

"You're not curious about what's going on?" Tony demanded. "Clearly there's a function of proximity to whatever Em's experiencing, but now we can factor - "

"No."

"Was it the same as last time?" Jane asked, moving closer to her as the two men argued.

"Yes and no." She glanced up at her husband's red face before whispering, "At least I know he's okay."

OOO

Neither of them slept well after Emily was discharged at one in the morning. Steve curled himself around her as they lay in bed, holding her tightly against him as reassurance that she was there. In fits and starts, she told him about what she'd seen, her anxiety of it happening again mixing with the contentment of knowing that, somehow, that Steve had his happy ending.

Her Steve ran his fingers through her hair and down her spine, trying to soothe her into sleep. Eventually, she dozed and dreamed about her children and grandchildren. When his five o'clock alarm sounded, it was quickly turned off but he made no move to go about his morning routine. Hers went off at six-thirty. Reluctant to let her out of his sight, Steve joined her in the shower. "We're going to take it easy today," he said, stepping aside so she could rinse the shampoo from her hair.

"I've got my meetings."

"Resched - "

"No." He swore softly and reached up to cup her face.

"Sweetheart lemme take care of - "

"No," she said, trying to infuse a bit of firmness into her voice while pulling away. "I don't want to be here today, and I need to know what my… if I still have a job." Steve sighed and hung his head.

"Security is non-negotiable, not if you're stepping foot out of this building."

"Fine." His eyes shot up and studied her, then he gave her a crooked smile.

"I thought you'd put up more of a fight on that one."

"I haven't forgotten what happened with Ryan," she snapped and shook her head. "I just… I don't want a team, please?"

"If you won't let me go," he paused as if waiting for her to contradict him. When she raised an eyebrow, he sighed again. "I can ask Nat."

"No, she's too recognizable now after her Senate testimony."

"Carter?"

"He needs to rest. I think we've asked a lot of him over the last few weeks, and he deserves some time to himself."

"He'd do it if you asked."

"Which is exactly why we're not going to."

"Clint?"

"What about Happy?" He gave her a confused look and she rolled her eyes. "Happy Hogan, Tony's head of security?" Steve looked ready to argue, so Em cut him off. "Tony clearly trusts him, and bringing an Avenger to this meeting is just a blatant reminder of why we're in this situation. You need to trust me on this, please?"

OOO

They'd run into Bruce on their way back from the store, a few outfits in the bags that Emily carried. Apparently, figuring that he was less likely to be yelled at, the scientist had been chosen to debrief her and collect a blood sample. With a promise that they wouldn't be turning on the machine again without advanced notice, he retreated back to Jane's lab. Steve's jaw had clenched audibly at that promise.

After putting her in the car with Happy and firmly closing the door behind her, he'd gone straight to the lab. Only Thor standing between him and the damn machine had kept him from tearing it apart with his bare hands. With a parting threat that if anything like what had happened the night before occured again, not even Thor could hold him back, he retreated to the gym. He worked out his frustration for a few hours before doing a quick clean of the apartment.

"Captain Rogers?" Steve looked up from his desk and met Happy's gaze. "Just wanted to let you know that Dr. Harthorn's back upstairs."

"How'd it go?"

"No problems, there or back."

"How's Emily?"

"I'll let you be the judge of that."

Pressing his lips into a thin line, Steve pushed away from his desk and walked closer to extend his hand. "Thank you again, Happy. I know being personal security is below your - "

"No problem. Felt a little like the old days with Tony and Pepper. But if you're looking for a permanent team for her, I can start pulling some options together."

"That'd be great. Especially if she's going to be headed back to the university regularly." The wry look Happy gave him let Steve know he wasn't going to tell him know how the meeting went. After saying their goodbyes, he returned to his desk and started to power down his computer.

AND ROSE, YOUR BACKS A MEADOW COVERED IN SNOW

The music hit him as soon as the elevator doors slid open, and he grimaced, bracing for the worst. At least she was at home this time and he didn't have to track her to the gym.

Her jacket was thrown over the back of the couch. He had to step over her heels, where they were discarded by the elevator.

YOUR THIGHS ARE THISTLES AND HOT HOUSE GRAPES

There was an open liquor bottle on the coffee table and an empty shot glass beside it. Her hair fell from the carefully crafted knot she'd put it in that morning as her hips swayed, and she bounced on her toes, arms curled over her head. He could see her eyes were closed in the window reflection, her lower lip caught between her teeth.

YOU BREATHE YOUR SWEET BREATH AND HAVE ME WAIT

Emily spun and twisted, then seemed to sense him there and opened her eyes. She stopped dancing. The corner of his mouth tipped up as he raised his eyebrows.

A slow smile spread across her lips, and then she was running towards him. At the last moment, she jumped and Steve got his hands under her ass just in time. He staggered back a step and her momentum spun them. His hand shot out to catch the wall as she guided his mouth up to meet hers in a bruising kiss that only broke off when she grinned.

"I take it you got good news?" he laughed.

"I get to keep both of them. The Smithsonian is ecstatic, and I just need to update some paperwork. ESU isn't even making me push back my submission for tenure!" Before he could even reply, she was reeling him back in for a kiss. When her leg dropped from his waist, he wrapped a hand around her thigh to keep her other one hitched to his hip and pressed her back against the wall, smiling against her mouth when she started to laugh. "Hang on, that's not the only news I have," Em chuckled, pushing against his chest. After taking his hand, she skipped to the kitchen and plucked an envelope off the counter, holding it up for him to see. "My new Social Security card came in, which means it's officially official that I'm now Emily Rose Harthorn-Rogers."

Steve's smile was blinding when she grabbed his hand and towed him back to the living room as the song demanded that they shut up and dance. She spun under his arm and screamed along with the lyrics. Her happiness was infectious. Em's eyes sparkled with unrestrained joy, and she threw her head back and laughed when he started to jump and fist pump like her nephews had at their wedding. They were nearly breathless from laughter when, after twirling her and leading them in a lurching two-step, they nearly toppled onto the coffee table.

It was enough to sustain him when they were greeted by the paparazzi after the celebratory dinner he'd taken her to later that night, and the emergency meeting with the PR department after his identity and the news of their marriage leaked.

When she led him in a slower, swaying dance in the early morning hours, Emily reminded him that the important people already knew, and that it would have happened sooner or later.

"We've got this, mon coeur. It's you and me, and nothing is going to change that."

Author's Note: So yeah... I may be slightly hungover today (for good reasons), but I wanted to push this chapter out. I needed alternate universe Steve to have a win, which is why he got to have Emily, their 3 kids, and Bucky. And I needed Em to have a win, which is why she got to keep her jobs. But mostly I just wanted to image of them dancing in the living room and having fun before we plunge back into PLOT! Next chapter is probably going to be a bit delayed because I recently found out that I need to execute 2 of my biggest events within 3 days of each other to accommodate a shift to a virtual format, plus I need to do a bit more research and I know that it is going to be a pretty dialogue-heavy chapter. Anyways, thank you for reading and please let me know what you think!