O
HERA
Marriage
July
When they owl finally came, Hope was alone in the kitchen. She opened the letter with trembling hands, her heart thumping violently against her ribcage, and scanned the short rows of text. Then she read them again. Surely there had been a mistake. She knew she hadn't been well prepared, but this was beyond everything she had feared.
There was no mistake.
Astronomy: P
Ancient Runes: T
Care of Magical Creatures: P
Charms: A
Defence against the Dark Arts: E
Herbology: A
History of magic: D
Potions: D
Transfiguration: D
A sick sense of dread rose in her throat as she remembered her parents' pride and delight at Teddy's ten OWLs, most of them outstanding. She didn't even have a third of that. No Outstandings. And she had a T. She hadn't thought the exam board actually awarded Ts. It was a standing joke in the family that if Ron hadn't managed one in his catastrophic Divination OWL during his own school days then it was an impossible feat.
The miniscule saving grace was the Exceeds Expectations in Defence Against the Dark Arts. She tried to imagine telling her parents and Teddy, not to mention Harry, that she had a T in that. Her lips twitched at the thought, but there was no real amusement there.
Three OWLs. Only one of them actually good. This was far worse than she had expected, and lower than any of the family had ever received. She was quite sure of that.
"Dope?"
She nearly jumped out of her skin.
"You got your results!" Teddy exclaimed, seeing the discarded envelope lying on the kitchen counter. "Can I see?"
His face fell at her expression.
"Not what you wanted?"
She did not trust herself to speak, merely held out the piece of paper.
Teddy scanned it, biting his lip.
"They- they're not so bad," he started. Hope tilted her head and glared at him in disbelief.
"You know that's bullshit. They're terrible. I didn't think they'd be this awful, Teddy. They were never going to be as good as yours, and I knew I'd failed some of them, but not this badly. What are Mum and Dad going to say?"
"They'll understand!"
"Will they?"
Even Teddy couldn't seem to find words to convincingly pretend this was true.
"It would be different if I'd tried really hard and studied loads and still got bad results. But I didn't. And they'll know. They know I'm not this stupid. They'll know I could have - Hang on," Hope broke off, remembering something. "Why are you here? I thought you and Vic were in Denmark?"
"We just got back. Victoire had to work today, but I wanted to come round."
In spite of herself, she grinned teasingly.
"Missed us that much, did you?"
Teddy hesitated. There was something guilt ridden about his expression.
"What's up?"
"I-" Teddy rubbed his nose, looking awkward. "I came to tell you guys that - um - Victoire and I are engaged."
Hope tried to process the rush of emotions that followed this statement. Happiness, of course, was predominant. Delight, even. Victoire was so lovely, and weddings were always happy occasions, and now she and Dom really would be sisters-in-law. But it was one more thing for Teddy to be congratulated on, the paper in her hand one less thing for her. And now her own news would put a dampener on the day that should have brought nothing but joy.
Everyone loved Teddy.
You're nothing like your brother, you know.
Teddy was cool. Hope is such a loser.
"Hope?"
"That's amazing! Congratulations!"
He accepted her fierce hug, but his eyes were shrewd with understanding as they broke apart.
"I can wait a bit before I tell them, if you like. Or maybe if I tell them first they'll be so happy they won't be bothered by your exam results."
Hope honestly didn't know what was best. If Teddy broke his news first…
Then your crap results will ruin it for him. He doesn't deserve that.
She could tell them about her results first.
Then he'll feel bad telling them and probably won't even do it today and you'll ruin it for him anyway.
She could not tell them anything at all.
And when they find out everyone else in your year has their results and you haven't told them a thing?
She considered leaving the bit of parchment on the kitchen table and not coming back to the house for several days.
That's plain stupid.
"You tell them the good news," she said at last. "They probably won't know that results are coming today. NEWT results are always a bit later. At least none of the Weasleys are in my year, and they don't talk to Neville that often, so hopefully they won't hear about Michael's yet. Especially as he will have aced everything. You tell them your news and we'll all celebrate and then tomorrow I'll let them know what a failure I am."
She had meant it as a joke. It didn't come out as such.
"You're not a failure," Teddy murmured. "Far from it."
Hope shrugged and stuffed both transcript and envelope into the inside pocket of her jacket, then looked anxiously up at him.
"This is a swear you won't tell – you know that, right?"
"Of course I know that."
O
Their parents, naturally, were thrilled by Teddy's own news.
"This calls for a celebration! At least with Bill and Fleur. Have you told them yet?"
"We will when Victoire's back from work. Maybe you could come round to Shell Cottage tonight?"
"That would be wonderful. Oh, this is so exciting, especially after this dismal year!"
Hope, after several minutes of forced buoyancy and cheerful chatter, slunk upstairs and scribbled identical notes to her two friends.
Got OWLs. So so bad. Only got three, and even got a Troll. Mum and Dad don't know yet. Meet tomorrow as usual? If I'm not grounded for life.
Both responses came mid-afternoon.
Hope, don't worry. Dad only got three OWLs, and he never even bothered taking his NEWTs. He's done alright for himself! Definitely meet tomorrow. Rx
Teddy and Victoire just told us. You're coming round tonight, and the Potters too, because Ginny was here when they broke the news. Going to tell the rest of the family tomorrow. Don't worry about results. It's been a difficult year and your parents will understand. D xXx
Unconvinced, Hope tried not to think about the horrible, incriminating piece of parchment that was scrunched up in her desk at home and celebrate with the others. It was difficult, doubly so because of how lovely the evening would have been otherwise, with just her family and the Potters round at Shell Cottage. Only Albus was absent, off somewhere Scorpius - did they ever do anything apart?
Lily was over the moon that they would all now be official family, and was already badgering Teddy and Victoire with ideas for wedding decorations and music choice. Victoire had grudgingly lent Dom her favourite skirt for the evening and Louis had dragged himself away from his holiday studying to come downstairs and join in the merriment.
"How is this happening already?" Harry sighed, as they raised a glass. "Another generation all grown up."
"How do you think I feel?" Remus laughed. "I'm a whole generation ahead of you, Harry, and I can promise you, it doesn't slow down. Quite the reverse."
"When is it going to be?" Lily asked hopefully. "Have you thought about a date?"
"Chill out, they've been engaged five seconds." James rolled his eyes at his sister.
"Actually." Teddy exchanged a glance with his now fiancée. "We did want to talk to you about that. It's going to be a bit tricky, given that term starts in September and Roxanne and Dom are off travelling soon. We don't mind waiting until they're back, but we also thought it might be nice to get married at the end of August, before they go?"
"Oooh, yes!" Lily beamed.
"If Hope doesn't mind us hijacking her birthday, that is," Victoire added hurriedly, glancing at her.
Hope didn't have any objections. She didn't care about her birthday this year at all. A wedding would be a much more fun.
"I know it's not much time, but we want to keep it simple," Victoire continued. "And as long as you guys and the family can make it, and our school friends, we'll be happy. It'll be quite causal."
"Fine by me!" James also looked delighted. "It will get me out of our preseason training weekend. Beth's already planned it all."
Beth was his fellow beater and captain, a lively fifth year with a ferocious arm and excellent aim which had left Hope covered in bruises more than once after meeting her on the quidditch pitch. After a disappointing third place for Gryffindor that year, she was keeping her team's noses to the grindstone.
"Ravenclaw are going to win again anyway, so I don't know why you're bothering," Dom shot at him, winking at Hope.
"Pfft, we are ending your streak this year," he retorted. "Why do you think we're training so hard already? You'd better watch out, Hope. Beth's almost as strong as me now. We'll be knocking you off your broom left, right and centre!"
Hope snorted. "I don't think so."
"I want to die during our fitness sessions," James groaned. "So it had better be worth it. She's making me work out twice as much as everyone else - says beaters are the most overlooked members of every team and this way we'll have a secret weapon."
"If it's a secret weapon, you probably shouldn't be telling an opposing team about it," Ginny chipped in dryly, while Hope thought of the Ravenclaw beaters. Despite Philip's spectacular bludger at the end of the quidditch final, they were definitely a weak spot on the team at times. Something to bear in mind as captain.
If you're made captain, she had to keep reminding herself.
"She shouldn't force me to exercise six times a week then," James said to his mother indignantly. "Six mornings a week for two hours? That can't be necessary. I need rest and recovery time!"
"My darling son, you do know a professional beater would do at least three times that?"
"Yeah, yeah, whatever." James reached across to grab a handful of peanuts from one of the bowls on the table. "At least today her OWL results came in the middle of it. She was so happy with them she let me finish early."
There was a sudden silence. Dom's eyes widened and Teddy winced slightly. Hope's heart gave a jolt, but she forced her face into impassiveness and took a sip of her drink. James instantly realised he had said the wrong thing, but there was no taking it back. Remus and Tonks exchanged a look, but neither of them said anything either, clearly not wanting to ruin the joyful atmosphere.
"More champagne?" Bill said hurriedly, reaching behind him for the bottle.
"Yes please."
"Last weekend in August then," Ginny said, turning to Teddy and Victoire in a valiant effort to pretend the most recent conversation had not happened. "Consider it in the diary!"
"Shit, Hope, I'm so sorry," James whispered, not long later, finding himself alone with her in the kitchen. "I just assumed... I didn't think. Were yours not good? Were your parents angry?"
"It's fine," she said wearily, uncorking a butterbeer she didn't want, just for something to do. "They're terrible, but Mum and Dad don't even know yet. I'm going to have to show them eventually but I was holding off, for Teddy, you know."
James appeared truly mortified as he gazed back at her, but she shook her head.
"Don't worry," she assured him. "It's my fault, not yours, and they were going to find out soon enough."
"It might be OK," James said, his face still humbled with guilt. "Mine weren't great last year, remember, and Mum and Dad were nice about it."
"You got nothing less than a P and you passed all the important stuff. Trust me, mine are way worse."
She was surprised and touched when the usually undemonstrative James pulled her into a hug. He did feel strong. She would have to be careful to avoid the bludgers he slammed towards her on the quidditch pitch.
"It'll still be alright," he said.
Hope was not convinced at all.
O
Tonks appeared to want to discuss the subject as soon as they got home, but Remus's tactful intervention meant Hope was able to escape to her room until the following morning, for which she was grateful. It was going to be bad enough without her mother fuelled on four glasses of champagne.
The next day, it was with a heavy heart that she opened her eyes, and it took her a few seconds to remember why she felt so apprehensive, before the memory of the little inked letters flooded back into her mind. Knowing she would have to face the music, she crawled out of bed and pulled on some halfway decent clothes. If only to save face she would prefer not to have this conversation in her pyjamas.
Her mother's gaze pierced her as she entered the kitchen. Her father's half smile was one of concern. Hope held her head up, face bold, eyes confident, hair its most vibrant shade of red.
Suit of armour.
"Come on then, what's the damage?" Tonks asked. Both tone and expression were casual. "Results aren't everything, Hope. Missed grades can easily be caught up."
Hope was feeling sick underneath her bright, breezy attitude. To her mother, 'missed grades' no doubt meant a handful of below average passes and the odd high fail, not the dismal selection of marks balled up in her fist. She handed her the paper and stood there waiting, but couldn't watch for either reaction as the seconds of silence dragged by.
"OK," Remus said, with a sigh, and she dared meet his eye. "They aren't great, let's be honest."
"Not great?" Hope cringed at her mother's tone, but she kept her outward defiance. "They're abysmal. What have you been doing this year? Have you studied at all?"
"Of course I've studied." Hope ignored the guilty stab in her chest at the blatant lie. "It's not my fault if I'm not clever."
"Oh don't give me that rubbish!"
"You are clever," Remus countered. Hope could tell he was trying to prevent escalation into a full blown argument, no mean feat when her mother looked the way she did now. "You're very clever, Hope. You cannot seriously stand there and tell us this was the result of a year's hard work, or even a year of moderate work."
Inside, Hope burned with shame, the disappointment in his voice, as usual, worse than the sparks flying from her mother's eyes.
"And you didn't even tell us!" Tonks burst out. This was apparently bothering her most of all. "Would you have told us, if James hadn't let it slip last night?"
"Well you're not stupid either. I think you'd have noticed eventually that I hadn't got my results, even with all the -"
She stopped herself. Despite her current state of turmoil, she could not bring herself to be resentful and hateful about the engagement celebrations, not when Teddy was always, always there as her back up and her big brother and most of all her friend.
"Don't take that tone with me," Tonks said. "This is serious. OWLs are important. For your future study and for your career."
"You literally just told me that results aren't everything! Anyway, George only got three OWLs and he never even sat his NEWTs. Roxanne told me. And look at him now."
"Right, let's see your business plan then. Because I can tell you that George and Fred had their future mapped out long before they sat their exams."
"Dora." Remus cut her off, his voice like steel. "That is not helpful."
She rounded on him instead.
"You're saying you're fine with this, are you?"
"No," he admonished, his voice leaden with caution. "I am saying that this has been an incredibly tough year and has affected everyone in different ways, and we need to be mindful of that."
Hope had to hand it to him, his practiced ability to divert his wife from building up a head of steam was remarkable. Tonks subsided at once, her expression softening.
"And we do understand that this year has been impossible to navigate as normal," he added, turning back to her. "But I think, even if you won't admit it, you know you could have done better than this. Which is why I'm asking you if you're alright? At school? In general, even?"
They were both now regarding her with concern, even sympathy.
Just be honest. Tell them you messed up, that your first term was a disaster because of what happened with Mum and your second term you were worried about Teddy. That you can't imagine going back to school next term without Dom and Roxanne and that's messing you up even more. Admit you can do better, promise you'll try harder and they probably won't say another word about it.
She remained silent and nodded sulkily in response.
"There is nothing you want to talk to us about?"
"No!"
She hadn't meant to snap, and knew it hadn't helped her case. Her mother's face flared with frustration again and Hope tensed, but no further remonstrations came.
"What's done is done," she said with a sigh, handing her back the transcript. "There's no point going on about it."
In truth, Hope was wrong footed, having been expecting a longer and far worse telling off.
"That's it?"
"Is there anything more to say?"
"I'm not... being punished?"
"I think those results are punishment enough, to be honest."
Remus raised his eyes skywards and Hope, angry, ashamed and upset at the world in general, had had enough. Leaving her father to deal with her mother, knowing that a few hours would be enough time for the volatile mood to pass, she snatched up her jacket and left the house, slamming the door behind her.
O
"They won't stay angry!" Roxanne said bracingly to her friend as they sat together in their secret little cove on the beach later that evening. She passed Hope the bottle she was holding for her to swig but Hope declined, the memory of the Hog's Head pumpkin punch still too raw in her throat. "You know they won't. It sounds like the worst is over already. They'll be disappointed for a few days and then they'll be back to normal."
"Maybe."
"You've seemed really down recently," Dom persisted. "Were you worrying about your results?"
No, I was worrying about how I'm going to get by at school without you both.
She shrugged.
"I guess so."
Talk turned to the wedding as the afternoon stretched into evening and the sun began to fade, and Hope's spirits did lift at the thought, when she remembered how much she had enjoyed planning her parents' vow ceremony. The two years that had passed since felt more like two decades.
"I'd better get back," she sighed, as the clouds turned vivid orange across the horizon. "Don't want push it too much today."
"We'll see you soon!" Dom said, standing up as well and giving her a hug. "And Victoire wants us to look at bridesmaid dresses this week."
Hope traipsed along the cliffside walk at snail's pace. Her mother was sitting at the kitchen table alone when she got home, and, with no desire to discuss her results any further, she decided to act as though the events of the morning hadn't happened.
"Where's Dad?" she asked, hanging up her jacked on the back of the door.
"Finishing a paper in the study. Where have you been?"
"At the beach with Roxanne and Dom."
She wondered if she was about to be scolded again, but as predicted, there was not a trace of anger in her mother's demeanour.
"You'll miss them next year, won't you?"
Yes.
"I'll be fine."
"Hope - you do know you can talk to me? About anything."
Hope nodded.
"I know."
She left the kitchen immediately and went upstairs, closing her bedroom door with a sharp click.
O
The mood in the house remained tense for a number of days, although the subject of exam results was not raised again. Neither of her parents were ones for holding grudges or labouring the point, for which Hope was grateful. Some contrition and extra politeness on her part seemed to be helping as well.
"Please can I go and see Gran?" she asked, on the Sunday morning.
"Of course," Tonks said at once. "You don't need to ask permission. She'll be delighted to see you."
Andromeda was indeed, welcoming her warmly and pressing her with a huge slab of homemade carrot cake as soon as she arrived.
"How are you?" she asked seriously, as they sat on the armchairs in the sitting room and Hope resisted the urge to curl her feet up underneath her like she did at home. She may get on well with her grandmother, but she was still expected to comport herself like a lady when she was at the Tonks' residence.
Hope shrugged.
"I hear you got your OWL results?"
"Yeah."
Andromeda's dark eyes were kind.
"Result's aren't everything, you know."
"That's exactly what Mum said."
Her gran's lips twitched.
"Yes, well, she would no doubt be astounded to hear me say this, after the grief she considers I put her through during her own examinations, but she's right. There are many ways to measure success and a few letters on a piece of parchment are among the least significant of them all."
"I still didn't mean them to be that bad," Hope muttered, crumbling the cake she hadn't yet tasted with the delicate silver fork. "I didn't want to - to disappoint them."
Her grandmother gave another wry smile.
"Ah. We all disappoint our parents occasionally, my dear. It's part of life. For you, it won't last, I assure you. I was..." she pursed her lips, "a permanent source of disappointment to my parents. I don't regret it, quite the contrary, but I was. The most disappointing of the three Black sisters. The let down. The disgrace. Now you are far from a disgrace, my love. Poor exam results are nothing in the grand scheme of things."
Encouraged by this unexpected moral boost, Hope lifted a proper piece of cake to her mouth, then lowered it. Something was odd about what her grandmother had just said.
"Wait," she said slowly, replaying the words. "Three Black sisters? You-" How had she never known this before? "You have another sister? Other than Scorpius's gran?"
A stiff, forced look stretched over Andromeda's elegantly lined features, her gaze fixed on the pristine window pane.
"Had."
"Sorry." Hope lowered her eyes to her plate again. "I didn't mean… I just… I didn't know. Mum and Dad never said. No one did."
"No, they wouldn't have done," Andromeda replied. "My elder sister is not generally mentioned, within our circle of friends and family."
Hope didn't say anything to this. She wasn't going to press her. Being allowed to ask questions was all well and good, but she had long ago learnt that when a subject caused such an alarming expression to appear on someone's face, it was to be left alone.
After a few moments, however, her grandmother volunteered the information herself.
"Do you remember that photo you found at Harry and Ginny's house before the vow renewal? The one that Harry wouldn't tell you about."
"Yes."
"The woman in that photograph was Bellatrix Lestrange."
"Bellatrix Lestrange!" Hope exclaimed, sitting up straighter. "I've heard about her. She was one of Voldemort's closest followers. She tortured Michael's grandparents - that's why they're in hospital. She murdered Sirius, and Granny Mol - I mean," she amended herself hastily. She didn't like referring to Molly as 'Granny' in her real grandmother's presence. Andromeda gave her a sharp look as she stumbled over the words, but said nothing. "Molly killed her, at the end of the second war."
"Indeed."
"Did -" Hope swallowed. "Did she kill your sister as well?"
"In a manner of speaking, I suppose," Andromeda said, after another dense silence. "But not in the way you are referring to."
Hope's brain had already kicked into gear and caught up with the conversation, as she remembered the likeness between the woman in that old photo and her grandmother, too similar to be anything other than-
"That's right," Andromeda confirmed, seeing her dawning comprehension. "My sister was Bellatrix Lestrange. Bellatrix Black, before she married Rodolphus. I was expected to marry his brother, Rabastan." She let out a mirthless half snort of laughter. "I'm sure you can imagine my parents' reaction to the news that I would instead be running off with the son of a local muggle farmer."
Hope smiled vaguely but she was staring at her grandmother in shock. Of all the things she had been told, why had no one ever mentioned this to her, something that concerned her own flesh and blood?
"You are wondering why you've never known before?" her grandmother asked.
"Um. Yes. I suppose."
"It is because the topic of Bellatrix Lestrange is sensitive and painful a dozen times over. She was my sister, although I don't consider her so anymore. She, as you rightly said, tortured the poor Longbottoms, ridding them of their health and sanity, and killed Sirius, who was not only my cousin, but your parents' best friend and Harry's godfather. She tortured me and your grandfather, during the second war. She also spent much of that time hunting down your parents and Teddy, before he was even born, although mercifully they kept themselves well hidden and she never succeeded. And, before her death, she did something that has meant no one who knows our family even likes to mention her name."
"What? What did she do?"
Andromeda hesitated. She seemed to be battling with herself.
"I will tell you," she said at last. "It isn't a secret, and you have a right to know. But I would ask you not to mention it to your parents, Hope. It is a painful subject, and they will talk to you about it when they are ready, not before then. We are in agreement on that?"
Hope nodded hastily. Two bony hands clasped in Andromeda's lap and her tone was lacking its habitual crispness as she spoke again.
"Bellatrix Lestrange was the reason that your mother was unable to have children in the years that followed the war. The reason that she miscarried three times, in the space of a few short years."
Hope exhaled, her breathing suddenly shallow.
"What? But how? I thought Bellatrix died in the final battle?"
"Oh yes, she did. Leaving her mark. I wasn't at the battle, as you know, but I've heard what happened many times. It is all too easy for me to imagine."
Her grandmother was clearly struggling to find words adequate for such monstrous actions and Hope sat there, apprehensive, as the explanation was painstakingly drawn out.
"The battle of Hogwarts was as good as over. Voldemort was on the brink of defeat by this point, with only a few remaining loyal fighters. Bellatrix was one of them, still alive, refusing to back down. She would have fought to the bitter end for her master. Your parents duelled her for a long time, but her skill was honed from years of brutal dark activity, theirs rusty after months in hiding, and it was all they could do to hold their own. Eventually, Bellatrix managed to hit Nymphadora with a curse that no one recognized, one that was unavoidable, but appeared to have no effects beyond winding her and knocking her to the ground."
After everything she went through last time. Harry had said it, back at the hospital last year, lamenting that Tonks had not told him about The Crow's apparently harmless spell. Hope had found it odd at the time, but too much had happened since to dwell on it.
"Then she stood there, laughing," Andromeda's face twisted. "I knew Bellatrix well enough to imagine what it was like. Laughing her head off, manic and unhinged, at which point young Ginny Weasley tried to jinx her. Naturally, Bellatrix retaliated, and many jumped to Ginny's defence, but Molly was quickest. A mother's rage when their child is threatened is like nothing you can imagine until you have a child yourself, I assure you. Bellatrix put up a fight, but Molly brought her down."
Hope tried to picture it, but she couldn't imagine Molly killing anyone. Then again, she couldn't imagine her parents killing anyone. Or Harry. Yet they all had, at different points in their lives, to protect those they loved most.
"No one thought any more about it," Andromeda continued. "Harry destroyed Voldemort, the war ended, the reconstruction began, and peaceful times ensued. And when Nymphadora became pregnant with a second child, it seemed that the timing was perfect. A couple of years after Teddy, the aftershocks from the war were finally dying down, and young Fleur Weasley was also pregnant at the time, of course. It would be something that she could share with her friends, not experience in hiding as she had done with Teddy. However," Andromeda blinked hard, "she miscarried after two months, before most people even knew of the pregnancy."
Hope twisted her hands together in her lap, nothing worthy of suitable spoken reply coming to mind.
"It happens," Andromeda said. "It is devastating, but she picked herself up, put on a brave face, as she always does, and she recovered as much as one can. Less than a year later, she had to go through it all over again."
She paused but did not elaborate, and Hope was not willing to ask for further details.
"After the second time, the healers ran some tests, but told her there were no obvious problems. Consecutive miscarriages, while rare and tragic, do not always have an underlying cause. Your father, on the other hand, blamed his condition, convinced that Teddy had been lucky but that his Lycanthropy was the cause of what was now happening. The healers were doubtful and your mother simply wouldn't hear of it. It was -" Andromeda's eyes closed briefly, "-a very difficult time. For everyone. The following year, however, she announced that she was expecting again. Five months into the pregnancy, with no apparent issues, they were daring to hope all was well. And then-"
The sentence faded to nothing and Hope sat there in dismay as her grandmother's eyes closed again, this time very tightly. She still could not find words to express her sorrow. How did one empathise with horror they had never known and couldn't even imagine properly? Andromeda took a deep breath, and her eyes were haunted but clear as she continued.
"Around this time, Hestia decided to return to St Mungo's. She had been considering it for while, and she loves both your parents dearly, so this was what convinced her to come back to full time healing. She joined the maternity ward, determined to know if anything could be done. At the very least, I think she wanted to prove that your father's condition was not to blame. After months of testing and personal study, she found evidence of a dark blood malediction in your mother's veins. Cleverly concealed, but deadly. Ancient magic which would prevent her from passing on her own bloodlines again."
Hope felt an instant chill spread through her body. Her voice sounded strange in her ears as she finally managed to speak. "And - Bellatrix did that? That was the curse from the battle?"
"It will never be proven." Andromeda's mouth was a thin line. "Not with Bellatrix long dead, but there can be no doubt, really. Bellatrix wanted nothing more than to purge her family tree of all but the purest of blood. She was determined to kill Nymphadora outright, but during the battle, when it seemed to be going badly, she made sure that the "tainted" blood would not be passed on should she fail at actual murder."
"But-" Hope's pulse deepened within her bones, bringing with it that horrible out of body experience again, like when her parents had told her they would have died in battle if it weren't for Percy. "But then why am I here? How was I even born?"
Andromeda's face glowed a little as she regarded her granddaughter. "Because the curse didn't have time to develop fully before its perpetrator was killed. Again, there is no solid evidence, but Hestia has theorised and she is rarely wrong about such matters. She believes that magic of such invasive and destructive power would have needed time, an hour at least, to take hold properly - that is to say irreversibly. Bellatrix died mere minutes after she cast the curse."
"So if she had been killed after an hour, or survived and gone to Azkaban, Mum would still have it in her blood?"
"In theory, yes. Hestia realised that the power of the curse was weakening with time, and six years on from the battle she could find no trace of it at all."
Hope had not touched a single mouthful of the cake and wasn't sure she could stomach any now. She put her plate on the tiny side table, trying to figure out what was on her mind.
"Did you have questions?" Andromeda had noticed her hesitation. "It is a complex topic and I won't pretend I can do it justice, but I would rather you talked about it with me than other people."
Hope wasn't sure what she wanted to ask.
"So Mum and Dad still... I mean, even after-"
She trailed off, but Gran seemed to understand her less than articulate attempts at a question.
"I don't believe it was a decision they took lightly, although I will never know the extent of their discussions. They keep their relationship private and always have. But yes, when Hestia told them that there was a chance the malediction was gone for good, they decided to try one, final time. Neither of them grew up with siblings, as you know, and they wanted a second child so very much. It was a tense pregnancy, but you were born, safe and sound, nine months later."
"And if it hadn't been for..."
"If Molly Weasley had not brought down Bellatrix when she did, then you would likely not be here today. And that," Andromeda eyed her beadily, one eyebrow arched, "Is one of the reasons she is more than worthy of the title Granny Molly, and why you should never be worried about calling her thus. Because you are here." She reached out a hand and grasped Hope's own slender fingers. "Here and whole and beautiful inside and out. And I can promise you, the complete opposite of a disappointment."
Trust her grandmother to see right through her. Hope tried to smile as Andromeda gazed at her with love and affection, even pride, but she was struggling to process the sequence of events that had so nearly led to her not being born at all. And whatever Gran said, she had let her parents down. More than once in the last year alone. Hearing about their struggles to have her in the first place was doing nothing to ease those feelings of guilt.
Perhaps if the earlier children had survived they would be better daughters than you.
The thought assaulted her so violently that she flinched. She did not voice it.
"Thanks," she said quietly. "For telling me. Maybe we can talk about something else now."
"I think that might be a good idea. For heaven's sake, will you put your feet up underneath you! You've been fidgeting around all afternoon."
Hope managed a proper grin and curled her feet up onto the armchair into her usual comfortable position, firmly banishing her most recent negative thoughts.
"Better," Andromeda said. "Now, tell me. How are Teddy and Victoire's wedding plans coming along?"
O
Hope returned out of the kitchen fire that afternoon to find her parents compiling a stack of wedding invitations. For all Victoire and Teddy had said they wanted a simple celebration, there seemed to be an awful lot of people coming.
"Hope!" Tonks looked up and beamed at her. "What are your thoughts on invitation design? Victoire can't decide and asked us to choose."
Pleased to have a distraction, Hope came forward to examine the two options indicated on the table top, one with delicate white flowers rotating on the border, the other with tiny exploding fireworks in the corners.
"That one." She pointed to the firework print. "The other one is kind of boring."
"Outnumbered, I'm afraid," Tonks said cheerfully to her husband, sweeping the flower pattern aside with a wave of her wand and, with a second flick, applying the firework design to the other invitations.
Quite abruptly, Hope turned, put her arms round her mother's neck and buried her face in the crook of her shoulder. She breathed in the familiar fragrance that reminded her, always, of home, her heart so full of mingled love, sadness and awe that it was all she could do not to burst into tears.
"I'll try harder," she mumbled, her voice muffled against the collar of her mother's robes. "At school."
The embrace was returned and as they broke apart her mother's eyebrows were narrowed curiously. Hope, bracing herself for the inevitable worried questions and already unsure how to reply without revealing what her grandmother had told her, breathed a sigh of relief when Teddy's voice came floating through from the front door.
"Anyone home?"
"Hi Teddy."
"I need your help!" He sounded quite wild as he burst through the doorway but he was grinning, so Hope guessed it wasn't anything too serious. "With the song list for the wedding. Vic says I'm allowed ten muggle songs and that's it! How am I supposed to choose?"
"Well my love, I have been telling you for years that you need to develop better music taste."
"Don't listen to her!" Hope exclaimed in mock outrage, comforted by the sudden relaxed atmosphere in the room, which had been noticeably lacking that week. "Muggle songs are the best songs. What have you got?"
"The L-O-V-E one, and Isn't She Lovely," Teddy said, sitting down next to her. "And one I've discovered recently called Your Song."
"How about Walking on Sunshine?" Hope suggested. "And I like My Girl."
"OK," Teddy scribbled them on a piece of paper. "Both good choices."
"Ooh and the Irish one!"
"The Irish one?" Teddy raised an eyebrow.
"You know, the one that goes eyayeyaye."
"Err.. Dopey, I have no idea what you're talking about."
"Yes you do!" She tried to hum the tune, but her singing skills were atrocious and she quickly stopped. "It played at Percy and Audrey's wedding," she said, giving up her attempts to locate the melody. "I remember because Dad danced with me and spun me round and round until I got dizzy and then I nearly smashed my head on the table. But I've heard it since. You play it sometimes in your room. It's my favourite."
"I know the one you mean." Remus nodded thoughtfully. "I don't know what it's called." He sang the first couple of lines, much better at keeping a tune that she was, despite the hoarseness that was ever present in his voice.
"Well I took a stroll on the old long walk of the day I-ay-I-Ay."
"Wait, you don't mean Galway Girl, do you?" Teddy's eyes crinkled in amusement.
"If you say so. Hey, don't laugh at me!"
"I'm not laughing at you," Teddy assured her. "I do like that song. But it would be a bit strange to play that at our wedding. We're not Irish."
"Oh. Fair enough." Hope shrugged. It was their wedding, after all. She wasn't quite sure why she felt so disappointed. It was just a stupid song.
oOo
August
Hope sat next to Dom and Roxanne at a vacated table as her brother waltzed with his new wife. They were taking a break from the dancing, legs aching from the manic preparations of the past week. Weddings, it turned out, were hard to plan with only a month's notice, but it had been worth it without a doubt. In a very similar configuration to Remus and Tonks' vow renewal, both setting and ambiance were perfect, and Teddy and Victoire had not stopped smiling all day. Dom was now watching her sister fondly, all animosity between them recently alleviated by her enthusiastic contributions towards the wedding, and Victoire's gratitude in return.
"I might actually miss her when we're away, you know," she mused.
Hope ignored the habitual lead weight in her stomach at the mention of their travels. They were leaving the very next morning. She should be used to it by now, and was determined not to ruin her last day with them by being miserable.
"I still can't believe Adam didn't come," Roxanne said, scowling suddenly into her glass of wine. "What an absolute noob."
Another sore point. Adam, having already forgotten about her birthday that week, had scrawled her a note the evening before, saying he wouldn't be able to make it to the wedding or to their planned meet up the following day, but that he was sure he'd be able to see her at some point before term started. Less than impressed, Hope had nearly written back to tell him that if fitting her into his busy schedule was so difficult then she wasn't interested any more. The letter had been sealed and the owl waiting with its leg stuck out towards her, hooting impatiently as she dithered. In the end she had thrown the first letter in the bin and replied with: No worries. I hope everything's OK.
She didn't want to mess up her first ever relationship by being stubborn and sulky. There might be a perfectly valid reason why he couldn't make it.
Unlikely.
"Will you come to the bathroom with me?" Dom asked Roxanne, as the song finished. "I'd rather go at the house."
Roxanne nodded at once and Hope got up too, but Dom shook her head. "You stay here, Hope, honestly. You've been running back and forth all day. Have a rest!"
Hope sat back down again. Maybe Dom and Roxanne didn't want her to go with them.
Stop it right now. You know that's not true.
She sat there looking round the marquee. Teddy and Victoire were still dancing, the embroidery on Victoire's lace dress sparkling as it caught the light from the overhead lanterns. George and Angelina danced together too, very close to each other. Bill and Fleur watched their daughter and new son-in-law, misty-eyed. Molly and Arthur were chatting animatedly to Tonks next to the cake stand and Ginny, Harry, Ron and Hermione were laughing together at a table, best friends in their own little world, as usual.
Teddy and Victoire's school friends were milling around at the edge of the dance floor, having drunk a fair amount already. Hope knew them all to varying degrees. There was Jessye, kind and compassionate, who had been so instrumental in the Narcovirus research; sweet, dedicated Tzejia, who worked in the Muggle Liaison Office; Will, with his dry humour and Dougal, laid back to the point of being horizontal, who was best man and who had kept the wedding attendees in stitches during his speech, with uncanny impressions of Teddy talking about subjects no one else understood and working feverishly in his lab.
Then Clara, bustling through life on a cloud of permanent stress and nervous energy as newly appointed editor of The Magizoologist, and Enya who ran a nail parlour in Diagon Alley. Finally, Victoire's Gryffindor friends: Luke, charismatic and cool; Christopher, studious and kindly; Morgan, with her stylish clothes and quirky hairstyles; Fia, ditzy but bubbling over with enthusiasm, and Max and Imani Shacklebolt, the minister's children, who had been Head Students during Hope's second year at Hogwarts. Such good friends, after so many years, despite their complete spectrum of interests and personalities.
Hope watched the group for several more minutes. Will had grabbed a half finished bottle of wine from an empty table and was replenishing everyone's glasses. Max was dancing with Jessye and Tzejia at the same time, holding each of their hands and spinning them round intermittently, while Enya and Imani were in hysterics as they shared a private joke together. The music changed to something more upbeat, and Luke and Morgan gave shrieks of delighted recognition and launched themselves into an exuberant quickstep routine in time to the beat. Every one of them looked like they were having the best time in the world.
I wish I had friends like that.
Maybe you would if you had let the hat put you in Gryffindor or Hufflepuff.
But Hope could no longer pretend that her choice of house was the reason for her lack of friends. There were plenty of lovely people in Ravenclaw; they weren't all like Elodie. She was the one who had never made an effort with anyone.
"You OK? Why don't you come and join in the dancing?" Michael Longbottom had materialised in front of her, hot and sweaty looking, a tie round his head.
She burst out laughing. "You look ridiculous."
"I hope by that you mean handsome."
He struck an exaggerated pose and Hope scanned him critically. She supposed he was quite handsome, although she had never seen him as such. She had known Michael all her life; it was as weird as thinking that Teddy was good looking.
Well, not quite.
"Hey, this is my song!" Michael said, as another tune started up. Hope recognised it as one of her own suggestions for Teddy's limited list of muggle titles.
"Your song?"
"Yeah! Listen." He started humming along and then joined in the words as it got to the chorus. "I guess you'd say… what can make me feel this way…" he widened his eyes at her expectantly for half a second. "MICHAEL!"
"It's My Girl, you idiot." But Hope was still laughing.
"Ah come on Hope, don't ruin it for me!"
He sat down next to her, more serious.
"Where's Adam? I thought he was coming."
"Bailed." Hope fiddled with one of the seams of her blue chiffon dress, averting her eyes.
Michael's face fell. "Sorry," he said awkwardly. "Come dance with us all? I'll get you a tie for your head?"
"Nah, I'm good. Thanks. You go on though. I don't want to deprive you of dancing to your song."
"Um. OK. But if you change your mind." Michael gave her a final worried glance as the chorus of "his" song came on for a second time and he bounced over towards the group that Hope had just been watching. Luke and Morgan included him in their dance at once, Luke putting his own tie around his head to match.
Hope couldn't help grinning, despite the wisp of jealousy still lingering in her chest. How did Michael find it so easy to be friends with everybody?
"I've missed that smile recently."
Remus had just sat down next to her, smart in his blue and gold robes, an empty glass in his hand. He placed it carefully on the table behind them and looked at her enquiringly.
"Everything alright, love?"
"Yeah, great!"
She wasn't sure he believed her - she didn't even believe herself nowadays - but he raised no objections.
"Thanks for all your help with the wedding preparations. We couldn't have done it all without you, and I know Teddy and Victoire really appreciated it too."
Least I could do, given that I've failed at everything else.
"I wanted to, it was fun."
They sat there watching the dancers as Michael's song finished. Then a new tune came on, one that Hope recognised by the first few notes alone.
"You didn't really think Teddy would leave it off his list, did you?" Remus laughed softly as she sat up straighter and her eyes lit up. "When you said it was your favourite?"
"I took a stroll on the old long walk of the day-I-ay-I-ay."
Remus stood up again and held out a hand to her. "Dance with me? Or are you too cool for that now?"
She let him pull her to her feet, the tent soon becoming a blur of colour and light as he spun her around, again and again, just like he had at Percy and Audrey's wedding. A bubble of happiness welled up inside her, the familiarity of the tune stirring up peaceful contentment she remembered having not very long ago, but that she had not felt for months. Her troubles seemed to melt away by magic as she twirled this way and that, to the point that she wasn't even sure why she had been worrying at all. Roxanne and Dom would be back from their travels soon enough, and who cared about boys? She just needed to get her head down to some proper study for two years and then she could go off travelling the world herself.
"...and I give her a twirl. Oh, I lost my heart to a Galway girl."
The song faded, but Hope's newfound positivity didn't. Remus steadied her as the dizziness passed before pulling her into a gentle hug.
"You'll be fine," he whispered in her ear. Hope wasn't sure if he was referring to her exam results, the new term at school, or her wellbeing in general, but in the light of day, at the beautiful wedding, with music and dancing all around her, with Roxanne and Dom running back into view, about to drag her onto the dance floor for an energetic Wandless Witches song (Victoire's choice) and with the happy faces surrounding her in all directions, she felt convinced.
O
Twenty-four hours later, alone in her room, Roxanne and Dom having set off on their travels and Teddy and Victoire away on their weekend honeymoon to France, Hope thought of the energy and laughter of the previous evening. She tried to recall the burst of motivation that had swept over her, so strong she had been convinced it would endure. No similar feelings came rushing back to her now. The happy bubble had gone.
OOO