DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything from the Naruto universe.

Thinking (+ flashbacks, speaking to Kurama in her mindscape, etc.)

Emphasis

Bijuu, etc. speaking

Bijuu, etc. thinking

Naru appreciated the lukewarm ramen that had been delivered to her cell in which she'd been sleeping beforehand. The fact that she was fairly sure that it was from Ichirakus made her suspect that it was either from someone being kind to her or conversely, that it was a reminder from the Sandaime of supposedly good times in the past, thus more manipulation from the man.

A giant of a man entered the room that seemed to be made of stone and Naruto prepared for interrogation.

At least he's not a Yamanaka: God knows the last thing she needed was for people to know that she was a reincarnation from a world they could hardly imagine. Aaaand, it seemed that he was finding it hard to look at her. Normally, it would bother her, considering her life in Konoha, but right now, perhaps it was best that this man was wary of her. "You're the man from the tree. Jiraiya of the Sannin."

Jiraiya nodded and looked guiltily at the small blonde who looked so much like his student. While he could see Kushina in her, the blood she was still caked in made that more difficult. Kushina could become enraged and/or would follow orders to kill, yes, but Minato was the one who always flipped a switch on the battlefield, turning from his sweet student into a man who was hated and feared among nations. He would bet a million ryo that when the blood was fresh, Naruto had looked like a miniature version of his student after his most well-known battle with Iwa. "You're a mess kid."

Naru continued eating her ramen, keeping her mind as blank as possible. It was barely warm as it was, and her cell was cold. "Did Shishou make it?" Maybe this man would finally tell her? The Chunin who'd delivered the ramen wouldn't tell her.

"What do you remember?" Jiraiya asked the girl with the dulled blue eyes.

Naru sighed and leaned back, not wanting to even think about what she had done. Of what she'd seen. Most of all, of what she may have lost.

"Shisui-shishou and I were in the Forest of Death: the tower's infirmary." The Sannin sat down on the floor against the opposite wall and gestured for her to continue. "He," she began and felt the bile rise in her throat, remembering how Shisui looked all bloody and with his eye socket openly gushing blood the last time she saw him. Putting her ramen aside, she focused on reporting, just like he taught her. "Shishou escorted me to the hospital in his fastest flicker and asked me to stay. I sensed the flames dying and flickered to the district."

"The flames dying:" a fitting analogy to the Uchihas being killed if there ever was one, Jiraiya thought.

"You were ordered to stay at the hospital?" he asked.

Naru honestly couldn't remember but wouldn't doubt that Shisui would have ordered her to stay away, and told the Sannin as much. "I know most if not all of the ANBU, Jiraiya-sama. The men that were attacking the Uchihas did not have painted masks, nor did they have chakra signatures that I recognized. Then there was the man in the orange mask," the man that had been haunting her. "He is the shinobi who attacked my parents and thus Konoha by using the fox that night. ...I assume you are aware of my lineage and status?"

He was her father's sensei and mentor, after all. He'd damn sure better not deny it.

Jiraiya swallowed the lump in his throat and nodded at the girl - and that's exactly what she was: a little girl, whether she was the jinchuuriki and a killer now or not. A little girl - Minato's little girl - who had battled for her life and the life of the clan that had all but adopted her and won.

"Mikoto-chan said he spoke to you?"

"So she's okay," Naru said to herself, breathing a sigh of relief before getting back to business, finding that she was still unable to smile. She wondered if she'd ever feel even human again. It was interesting that he used the -chan honorific, even after Mikoto-oba had beaten his ass not long ago. "He did. He claimed to hate me, admitted he'd taken the Kyuubi from my mother, and swore he'd be back to take him from me."

Jiraiya sat in silence, feeling absolutely sick. It took minutes before he could speak, and he appreciated the way the girl - his goddaughter - waited for him. And that's exactly what happened, too. She didn't stop her reporting because of what should be quivering or her own position or insecurities, she paused to give him a few moments to breathe. Kami, what kind of shinobi is Konoha breeding nowadays? Once upon a time, he and his teammates had simply been children when they were Genin: innocent. Not like this.

He thought that his godson, Kakashi, was a one-in-a-million: a little adult stuffed into a child's body. It seemed his goddaughter was the same, though. Maybe it wasn't fair that it made him want to pound Sakumo and Minato, since both his friend and student fully expected their children to be shinobi. Maybe their children never had a choice, considering their fathers' blood-soaked careers. Their fathers' enemies would always be their own, wouldn't they?

Until someone can solve this cycle of hatred.

And because of his duties to the village, he'd failed both of them. Well, because of his duties, plus Kakashi's apathy and bloody determination to be alone - and Naruto's status. He should've never agreed to be a godparent.

"Can you tell me anything about him? Specifics, Naruto-chan."

Naru nodded and allowed her mind to relive that ridiculous mask on that terrifying shinobi again. "An Uchiha in a long black robe or cloak with red clouds on it; the red clouds were outlined in white. He was wearing a large, bright orange mask that only showed an... evolved or weird Sharingan?" She hoped that description would appease him. There was no way that she'd tell anyone about the Mangekyo that Shisui and maybe even Itachi had.

"The mask was swirled, and he managed a teleportation technique that he used through that ONE EYE," she continued, trying to suppress her disgust. "Male, average height and weight. Bulky, muscular stature, and either pretending to have or has multiple personalities," she chuckled without any mirth. "One minute his voice was high and childlike, the next it was deep and slow. Then there was his third voice," she said and gagged. Managing to keep her ramen down, she resumed her report. "Manic or at least hyper. The Kyuubi thinks he's Madara or at least thought he was, but I think that's because he summoned him."

"You can contact the Kyuubi?" Jiraiya asked hesitantly. "How long have you known about him?"

"He's in my gut; of course, I can contact him," Ru said bitterly. "I met him when I was little after something happened… An assassination attempt or something."

"You were supposed to be protected by ANBU!" Jiraiya exclaimed. And you're still little.

Ru was surprised that he was so vociferous about it. "I was. But things happen, Jiraiya-sama. I love my ANBU: they were always there, raising and protecting me."

"Right," Jiraiya said, clammy and wiping his mouth shiftily. "And drop the -sama, kid. I'm... I'm your godfather," he said as he flushed and covered his eyes, finally whispering, "for fuck's sake."

"..."

Naru cleared her throat, deciding to put that piece of information away, for now, to get this shitty report over. "The unknown Uchiha would've killed me, but Ichika-sama... Mikoto-ob," the tears began to come, and the blonde dug her fingernails into her skin to suppress them. "I was ordered to the Uchiha main house..."

"Because it's sealed," Jiraiya surmised wrongly.

Ru would let that go. She'd thought about it and didn't want to get Mikoto-oba in trouble, if that were possible, for wanting to protect Sasuke, her son! "H- her uhh chains suppressed that man, squeezed him and it worked! Other things just- they just went right through him," she exclaimed in something between wonder and horror. "Goddam freaky ninja shit," she said to herself, rubbing her arms. "Then sh- she fell. H- he left." Jiraiya started to speak again, but Naru tried to finish. "She didn't die just then. I thought she did, heheh, a few times, ya know, but she gave me a seal to protect Sasuke-kun and maybe me, too. Then I left cuz shishou's chakra dropped," she whispered, but there was a snarl to it.

Uzumakis and their snarling, Jiraiya thought fondly despite the gruesome topic and setting. "Did Uchiha Mikoto order you to kill Danzo?"

"Wh- what?! I - that guy was Danzo, huh?" she asked in realization. "I was always told to stay clear of him," she said to herself. "From Mikoto-oba, too. Guess I didn't, huh?"

Jiraiya watched as the kid shook in silent laughter before the tears came and quickly went. She wouldn't look at him now. That reaction was a little more normal, but he knew there would be dark days to come.

"Shisui? Did he make it?" she finally asked in a small voice, clutching her filthy top.

"Yeah, kid. He's in the hospital, but someone's here who'll be able to heal him: no sweat," he said, hoping Tsunade could fully heal the kid. And he got why the little blonde broke out in a sob, he really did. She looked so small, curled up, holding her knees, but she needed to understand her situation now. "Look kid: here's the deal. You killed a 'beloved village elder' and as the jinchuuriki, you're not really liked," he said using finger quotes, laying it on the line. "More than half the Uchiha are dead, there's a village lockdown, but I gotta get you outta here. People are stupid, Naru-chan," he continued, a little too familiarly considering that he'd only seen the girl once in her life. "I need to report in, but if anyone other than an Uchiha or ANBU you know WELL comes into this shithole, you attack them. Got it? Run for your life and I'll meet you in Tanzaku Gai."

Naru's eyes went wide. "You want me to go rogue?!" She knew what happened to rogue ninjas, and fuck that! She'd take her chances with the Hokage and guilt his ass out! Or better still... "Fuck no! I'll go to the compound and seal my ass in with everything I can find, but fuck NO I won't do that!"

"Yeah," Jiraiya admitted reluctantly, "that's a better plan. I forgot about the compound." He was just trying to keep her alive!

Ru cursed him in a little over a whisper, "Stupid old man."

"Brat," Jiraya replied with no heat. "What do you remember after you took Danzo's head?"

"Nothing," Naru replied after a beat. "Absolutely nothing. I only remember swinging at him. I, uh, took the sword from Mikoto-oba's closet, you see. Just," she paused, trying to think of what happened after that, but her memories were blank. "I woke up here on the floor this morning: about an hour ago?" she asked, more than said.

Jiraiya nodded but corrected her. "It's evening now, and you've been here a while. C'mon, hop on my back." Ru's lip curled up as if she'd rather jump off the Hokage monument than do so. He bent down. "Get on and that's an order. I hear your genjutsu sucks and I'm gonna hide you and sunshin us over there in one so that nobody sees ya."

"Jailbreak," Ru said in a single unhappy snicker. "And I'm working on the goddamn genjutsu." She just wanted to be alone, so acquiesced to his demands. She had a feeling they weren't really orders issued by the Hokage, but what was she supposed to do? Jiraiya was a Jonin and said to be the strongest ninja in the village - well when he was in the village. Otherwise, he was said to be one of the strongest ninjas anywhere.

Fucking ninjas.

Moments after, he put her down inside her clan compound. Without saying a word, she went inside her parents' house - the one she'd tried to avoid staying in outside of getting scrolls or records from. Jiraiya, unfortunately, followed her in.

"Clean up and pack your things," he said, looking around solemnly. "Lock and seal yourself in here, too. I'll be back in a bit." He turned to her, stared at her small form, and flopped the large scroll he always carried down on the floor as the girl stared into nothing. Pulling out a few empty storage scrolls, he eventually snapped his fingers a couple of times to get her attention. "Seal everything you want to keep in here, kiddo." Standing up, he patted her blood-caked stiff hair, knowing that she'd have to wash it several times to get all of it out. "Ja," he said as he left, not knowing what else to say. "Lock and seal it up, Naruto-chan!"

He hit the other side of the door hard enough to break Naru out of her funk. She did as he requested. She walked up the stairs and opened the nursery door that she had completely avoided since that one day. She reached out to a teddy that reminded her of Pooh Bear but pulled her hand back. She didn't want to taint the pure bear with her filth. She made a clone inside her mindscape and laid down.

She wasn't sure when she stepped into a freezing cold shower with her clothes on but watched the porcelain tiles and water turn red as it ran down the drain.

Jiraiya stepped into the Hokage's office and walked over to his godson. Kakashi had his book in his face, as he often did, and Jiraiya pulled it away from him slightly. "She's secure," he whispered behind it.

The silverette showed no emotion, but Jiraiya knew the kid's chakra well enough to know that he was relieved.

"Morons," he said loud enough to get Hiruzen-sensei's team's attention. They were still at it: still trying to get his sensei to send out a missive to find another Uzumaki to stick the Kyuubi in. He'd die and kill them ten times over rather than allow that to happen. "What?" he asked them flippantly as they turned to him. "You are morons."

"Do you have any more information?" Hiruzen asked exhaustedly while his teammates sputtered. Honestly: what do they expect? It's Jiraiya! And they are being morons! Even the idea of retrieving an Uzumaki from outside the village - if there were any - was preposterous. Give the Kyuubi to someone outside of Konoha; to someone who was even less loyal than Naruto? There was still time to ensure her complete loyalty to the village, and she was obviously already loyal to the Uchihas - but of course, that was a problem, too.

And how would we even transfer ownership of the fox? He supposed they could find the scrolls necessary in the Uzumaki compound. He knew what the seal looked like; he'd seen it on the babe and believed he knew what it did, but Minato hadn't left a key that he knew of. The Kyuubi would die with Naruto, from what he understood.

"Mikoto-chan didn't order her to kill Danzo," Jiraiya said with a roll of his eyes. Even the idea of Mikoto doing that was ludicrous to him. "Her mind's blank from when Shisui-san stopped her to only about an hour or so ago when she woke up. I said it before, and I'll say it again: she should've been in the hospital and not locked up on the floor in the fucking mountain!"

"She's compromised," Homura said scathingly before turning to his teammate. "You know what Tobirama-sensei always said about the Uchihas, Hiruzen, and they've ensnared our jinchuuriki!"

"Biggoted old man," Jiraiya said to get another smattering of scoldings. He was unrepentant and shrugged the old bitties off. Sensei really needs to step down. "They should make you Hokage; you're the only one in the village who could handle it," he whispered to his godson.

"Fuck. You," was Kakashi's succinct reply as he once again wondered why he was still present for all of this nonsense. Was it so he could Chidori the remaining elders? He could do that. He'd be happy to do that.

"Do you want to hear what she said or not?" Jiraiya exclaimed, finally getting completely pissed off, his chakra flaring. Clearly, the elders wouldn't believe Naruto regarding the loyal Uchihas, but he needed to tell them about the remaining assailant who said he'd also unleashed the Kyuubi from Kushina.

That's where he started.

Jiraiya found his goddaughter curled up in what should've been her nursery, once upon a time. It should've been a happy time, he thought, stepping into a room he'd never even seen. What a sad, sad place.

"You ready to go, kid?" He needed to get her out of here before they ordered a Mindwalk on her. The idea of doing that to a jinchuuriki OR a child was ludicrous, and Jiraiya wouldn't doubt if it would destroy both the child and the Yamanaka in charge of the Mindwalk. IF they could order a Yamanaka to do it; he hoped there were clan laws that protected them from being forced to use their techniques like that.

And Kami only knew what the fox would do if it happened...

It took her a while to reply, and when she did, she stood up while tightly clutching a teddy bear. "I wasn't sure what scrolls to take," she gulped, gathering a bunch of storage scrolls. Jiraiya picked her up and put her on his hip, and Ru didn't even notice. Neither did Rachel. He carried her downstairs into what was once her parents' office.

She'd been caring for it, Jiraiya noticed. Before he learned that the toads had been given Naruto's seal, he had come here to find it. He clearly remembered breaking down on the floor in this room, so weak and begging Kami to bring back his student and so many others, clutching one of his student's Kage robes. He cleared his throat and looked around the room before beginning to seal up as much as he could.

"Are you sure you should be traveling with all of that?" Rachel asked numbly. She wasn't quite sure what she thought about being let out, but she felt so bad for Naruto - although the little girl could be scary-tough. Jiraiya mumbled something she didn't understand - Japanese wasn't her first language - and she looked at the girl with the brighter blonde hair laying in front of the big fox in the cage, sighing.

How was she supposed to do this? She'd sort of done it before, right?

And back then, Naruto had been a baby. Naruto was an idea: some kind of animated nonsense first! "What a drag."

"You sound like a Nara," Jiraiya said idly. He then stared at the girl, wondering what she was thinking. She looked like a chibi-adult, with the way she was standing. It didn't seem right. Her chakra didn't feel right, but he had to disregard it for now. "Sign this," he said after pulling out the summoning scroll.

"What is it?" Rachel asked blankly. "I won't put my signature on things I haven't fully read."

Jiraiya began laughing. "You are a riot."

Rachel looked at him in disbelief, shifting to her hip. "The fuck?" Who the hell wouldn't first read what they signed? Seriously, she'd been one of those oddballs who read the whole Apple agreement every time it changed. She'd had her digital identity stolen twice! Did he not know how long it took to recover from that? And she'd been young and had little credit history at the time!

"We've gotta work on your language and just... Just sign the damn scroll," Jiraiya griped.

Rachel bent down to the young girl in her mindscape, shaking her a bit to get her attention, and ignoring the fox who was watching them with interest. He was alright: she liked him, although he could be a jerk sometimes. But so could she. "Hey, Naru-chan. I can't do what he's asking. I can't write Japanese, er- hiragana, katana - I mean kanji, whatever it is."

Naruto sat up and looked at her former self, wondering what the heck was going on. "To itte imasu. Watashi wa eigo o hanashimasen."

"Oh fuck. This isn't good," Rachel mumbled, wondering if this separation was permanent. She understood enough to know that the little girl she'd been reborn as apparently didn't understand her: she'd said something similar to those whose first language was Japanese often enough back when she'd been alive. In most likely broken Japanese, she tried to tell the little girl what she needed. "Uhh... Watashi wa anata... shinobi no tawa - uhh, suru hitsuyō arimasu, onegaishimasu?" The little girl just stared at her. "What I'm trying to say is that you have to handle the ninja stuff, honey! I can't do it!"

"Ninja no mono?" Ru asked before laughing brightly. "Ninja… shit!"

"That's right!" Rachel said encouragingly, patting the little girl on the head, her smile faltering completely when the girl went away. This is the second weirdest thing that's ever happened to me.

She realized Jiraiya had understood everything she as Rachel was saying, so she must be better at Japanese now than she thought.

"A second personality?" the Kyuubi asked with way too much interest. The fox seemed much too happily reflective at the possibility.

"Maybe? And don't get any ideas, Fluffy. We'll still manage... I think we both still want to live, and we'll get it together eventually," Rachel said, waiting for Naruto to come back although she was plenty worried about it. "Maybe it'll be like babysitting a child or childlike clone. Oh well, I've lived through worse, I suppose." The Kyuubi tsk-ed and closed his eyes, although Rachel wouldn't put it past him to be thinking of a new escape route with this information. She had more immediate concerns, however.

Ru had sat up and signed her name: it only just fit into the space allowed and was the first time she'd signed her full name, Namikaze and all. She watched as Jiraiya stood up, then decided to let the Rachel lady handle the rest.

Rachel rubbed her temples and tried to think of how to "recombine" herself with Naruto. Or just let herself go. She could pray, right? On her own, she'd definitely never make it here...

Jiraiya picked her up to put her on his hip again and Rachel freaked. Gross! No way was she putting her legs around an old man in her/Naruto's childlike body. "Put me down!" Once again, Jiraiya understood her. Following the man outside of Naruto's parent's home with a big scroll on her back, too, she stopped as she looked at the two women who were in the compound, feeling... irritated. She looked at Naruto in her mindscape, who looked absolutely furious and held onto her small shoulders. "Shall we?"

Naruto stomped over to where her godfather - GODFATHER! - left her to the two women she knew by reputation. "Hello, cousin."