Chapter 34
"Yes, I'll have some coffee, black, no sugar. And for you Mai?" Kasai asked with an endearing smile.
"I'll have some Lady Earl Grey tea, but if you don't have that regular Earl Grey will do." Mai said with a smile to their waiter and he was gone in a flash. Though he was trying to hide it, Mai could tell Kasai was staring at the bruise on her face.
Between her explosion with Naru, her mess at school today, her overbearing coworkers, the passing of her best friend, and now her detective work against Kasai; Mai was wearing thin and just wanted to pretend nothing had happened.
"Well, how have you been?" Mai asked politely. She wanted to test the waters since she was nowhere near ready to let even a hint of her intentions and stress show.
"Hmm… I think the both of us have been asked that question hundreds of times these past couple weeks. I'm not even sure how to answer genuinely anymore." Kasai said rubbing the back of his neck. He chose to wear a small smile and keep the air light between them.
"I should have known better. I guess the question itself is kind of a loaded one to begin with. I never know what's appropriate to say either." Mai agreed letting her eyes wander out the window.
"I don't think there is a right way to comfort a mourning person. It's like we have to adjust and go through a change. We don't comfort caterpillars while they make their chrysalises." Kasai commented.
"That's because when they enter their cocoons there's the promise of a better tomorrow. They know when they awake, they'll be even more beautiful. With this, it's the bitter opposite. All that is promised is the emptiness of what is missing." Mai said and before she realized she was ripping up her napkin all over the table. She sighed and stopped and started laughing coldly.
"Listen to me. I'm such a drag on this beautiful rainy day. Here you are wanting to speak with me and I'm just blabbing away." Mai smacked her head lightly as a miniature punishment.
"No, not at all. I owe you this." Kasai said as he folded his hands together and stared at his hands solemnly.
Silence overtook the two momentarily.
Normally Mai would have pushed her own hand onto his in comfort, but the thought of him even being across from her was disgusting. Perhaps he had come to her to come clean about what he had done. Only then would Mai consider any gesture of compassion.
Although…
'I don't like to be cruel. I don't like to dislike people. I don't know if it's even possible for me to hate, but my gut is telling me otherwise. However, I have to comfort him like I would with anyone else. I need him to be vulnerable when I get to the bottom of this.' Mai thought.
"A black coffee for the gentleman and a Lady grey for the grey lady." The waiter said with a laugh.
"Oh thank you." Mai said graciously.
"Can I get the two of you anything else?" The waiter asked politely.
"Oh no, I'm good. Kasai?" Mai asked sweetly and he merely shook his hand.
"Alright then. Enjoy your beverages." Then the young gentleman was gone. Silence overtook them again as Mai blew on her tea.
"I'm sorry Mai. My father is the one who put us in this position. I hadn't seen him in so many years. I never thought he even remembered who I was. Let alone was watching me. I should also take responsibility for my father's actions." Kasai said staring into his coffee his eyes void of emotion.
Mai looked him in the eye for the first time since they arrived in the café together, which he quickly averted back to his cup. His face was blank. Naru did this sometimes. Removing all traces of emotions from his face in order to conceal his thoughts.
Mai chose to start weaving her webs.
Gently placing her hand across the table onto his, trying to catch his eye once more. He seemed to give in and raised his eyes.
"I don't think you are being fair to yourself Kasai. You are also grieving not only the loss of Keiko but for the loss of your father. I know he was never there for you, and his place was absent in that regard, but it must hurt you to know he could have been. Also, the way he chose to reappear in your life must be confusing for you as well. Perhaps this is not in your nature, but take some time to consider yourself in this situation. Grieving is about self-reflection, not about placing the blame. The dead don't want that, and neither do I."
Mai said and gave a small smile before recoiling and addressing her teacup once more.
"Th-hank you Mai. I truthfully haven't thought of it that way. I just wanted to come here and let you know I'm sorry about what happened." He stated smiling back sadly. He reached into his pocket and pulled out eighteen- thousand yen to cover the drinks.
"My mother is expecting me to be home soon so I must be going. See you around Mai and thank you for hearing me out." He bowed and then left the small shop with a ding of the shop door.
Mai watched as he stepped back out into the rain.
He disappeared into a cab and was gone.
She exhaled once more now finally releasing the tension within herself. Pondering the irony of her words she couldn't help, but laugh at her falsehoods.
"The dead don't want to place blame huh? Well, that's news to me and every other specter I've met. Placing the blame on him is exactly what I'm trying to do now. After all what if he is telling the truth about his father? He could very well have broken up with Keiko and had his father kil-… I mean, did what he did on his own. How could I figure it out? I should have taken off this stupid key!" Mai though to herself as she finished up her cup.
Her thoughts wandered to that day in the cemetery when Gene made her touch Kasai.
"It was just like what Naru does. Psychometry. I've never done that before and without Gene, I don't know if I could do it again. I could ask Naru for help, but after what I said to him I'd be surprised if I wasn't kicked out for real this time. I can't do that. That means I'll have to ask Gene the next time I see him." Mai leaned her head back and closed her eyes. It was all becoming too much for her now. She wasn't one to complain or make a big deal of her situation, but things weren't looking too good for her.
"Maybe I did something awful in a past life and this is my punishment. I'm just bad for anyone that cares about me." Mai pondered and felt a single tear escape her shut eyelids.
"Excuse me, miss. Are you okay? "Mai leaned forward to see the young waiter looking at her. She wiped her eyes and nodded.
"Would you like me to get some ice for your face? You don't want it to swell any more than it already has trust me. The other day one of our cooks opened a cabinet door on my face and I was swollen like a melon!" He said and laughed and Mai chuckled lightly.
"There's a smile. I'll be back." Before Mai could object the boy was gone.
He couldn't believe her.
There wasn't a trace of rationality in any of her words and she just left him there in the rain. Naru sat back in his car and could see his assistant sitting in the window of some small cafe. The boy she was sitting with had left a few minutes ago and Mai sat there with her head tilted backward.
He recognized him from Keiko's funeral, and something seemed off about the boy.
Naru didn't know why he followed her since the previous times she'd run off he'd leave the idiot to her own devices, but this time he shadowed. Perhaps it was the fact that her mental state was deteriorating due to a number of circumstances. Lin even secretly called
Madoka for advice on how to help the girl, but so far all they had done was make her feel trapped.
The young scientist picked up his phone and waited for his other assistant to pick up.
"Yes Noll." Lin said.
"I won't be coming back today so close up the office when you leave tonight." He said as his eyes watched a single droplet race down his window.
"Is something wrong?" Lin asked his tone changing.
"No."
"Noll, if you don't want me to act inform me of the situation. You left the office immediately after speaking with Yasuhara without a word." Lin said sternly.
"Mai is being stubborn and doesn't want me to pick her up. Evidently, she got into a fight at school and ran away with this boy when I tried to pick her up." Noll explained. Normally he would have hung up on Lin and let him figure out the rest on his own, but he was also growing tired of Mai's behavior.
Comforting was never one of his strong points, and before recently he'd always have Gene for that. He wanted Lin's help but there was no way he'd ask for it outright.
He still had his pride, didn't he?
"A stubborn teenager in mourning who runs away and doesn't listen to authority. I wish I knew what that was like to deal with." Lin responded dryly and Noll rolled his eyes.
"Well, if you looking for advice call Madoka. If it was a spell perhaps, but if it's a woman you're better off talking to her." Lin replied and Noll pinched his nose bridge.
"So you're advising me to ask someone else's advice?" He responded dryly.
"Would you rather I suggest your mother, or Ayako, or Masa-" Lin started but his pupil got the point rather quickly.
"Alright, Lin. I get it. Don't forget to return the papers to my file." Noll said and hung up without another word. He pulled up his teacher's contact information in his phone, but couldn't bring himself to press call. Instead, he pulled down the mirror on the driver's side and stared at it, willing the reflection to no longer be his.
"Gene. I need your help." Naru called looking into his own reflection, waiting for any hint of his brother.
"I'm not sensing any vicious spirits in the vicinity unless you finally want to ask me for my pancake recipe. I'm sorry Noll, but I'm taking that one to the grave. No pun intended." Gene spoke back and laughed heartily.
"It's Mai." He said which cut through his brother's bubbly laughter in a second.
"What happened?! What's wrong?" Gene asked frantically. Naru rubbed his temple in an attempt to lessen the tension rising within his skull.
"She isn't fairing very well." Was all he could say.
"Is it her abilities? Are they making her ill?" Gene fished from his cryptic brother.
"No, that isn't the issue. Though she hasn't been wearing her necklace as often as she should. The idiot probably thinks that will raise her resilience." Naru spoke annoyed.
"Then what is the problem, Oliver? Spit it out and stop keeping me in suspense! "His brother's tone becoming more serious by the second.
"The past couple cases have taken a negative toll on her, not to mention the death of her friend, and trying to control her abilities. I've been taking Lin's advice on helping her move in with me and being stricter when it comes to training, but it's pushing her away. Her mental health isn't improving at all." Noll said frankly searching his brother's eyes for answers.
"Of course not! Lin is the one giving you the advice that's why? Remember Mai is an orphan just like we were. In this sort of shitty situation, she's going to look for a parental role model for advice and comfort. Does she have anyone like that? If not, you should call Madoka to help?" Gene replied and Noll scoffed.
"That's what Lin said and she does have a teacher that used to watch over her whom I have contacted and will be here within the week, but that doesn't help me with her now. Besides, what if she becomes cross that I've continued to intervene in her personal life? I've given her space, but it hasn't reaped any benefits. I even suspended her from SPR which has made our interactions less than pleasant. "Naru vented for the first time in a while to his brother which admittedly gave him some relief.
"Woah, you suspended her?" Gene said astonished.
"Yes, she forced my hand, so I had too." He responded plainly.
"I didn't think you had the balls, that's all. Where is she now?" Gene asked and Naru chose to ignore the previous comment.
"She is sitting in a coffee shop across the street. Alone." Naru said letting his eyes wander away from his mirror once more to the brunette within the window.
"And you are just sitting in the car stalking her?" Gene asked raising his eyebrow.
"No, you ass. I was supposed to pick her up from her study session with Yasuhara earlier since she got into a fight at school today. She clearly wasn't in the mood for extracurricular activities. When I tried to pick her up, she scolded me for and I quote "holding council over her life without considering how she feels" and ran off with some boy. They spoke at the coffee shop and he just left before I called you." Naru informed his eyes wandering to the girl in the window every now and then.
"And you called me to vent? Or would you like my advice?" Gene said curiously.
"The latter."
"Well, I supposed I shouldn't be expecting a pretty please from you anytime soon, but you are asking for advice about a girl. Luckily I'm already dead or I certainly would have had a heart attack after hearing this." Gene said and laughed and his brother's expense.
"She is my assistant and productivity would suffer if I wasn't able to count on her abilities. The sooner she's back on her feet the sooner SPR can continue business as usual." Naru rationalized.
"Yeah sure. Just your assistant? That's complete bullshit Noll, and you know it! You wouldn't have opened up your apartment to her or be this concerned for her if that was all she meant to you. Aren't the two of you at least friends?" Gene asked his brother honestly.
"Maybe at one point, but not after how things have been going as of late, especially today." Naru response strategically ignored the commentary once again.
"Fine, you want my advice? Go and talk to her. From what I observed she always calms down and comes back when she's cooled down. She always makes you tea and reconciles her issues internally in order to prevent any further problems. Do her a favor. Let her vent so that she can also have a say in her life instead of you pulling the strings in the background. Listen to her, give her choices, and if she asks your advice then you may intervene. "Gene said and Noll sighed heavily and crossed his arms.
"I see." Was all Noll responded.
"Alright, if things go really well don't forget to wear protection because…" Before his brother could respond he closed the mirror and turned the car off.
He was going to have to make this right.
Mai felt bad for causing the waiter so much trouble. He'd gotten a bag of ice for her still smarting face. He even said she could stay as long as she needed, and Mai was grateful for his kindness. She didn't mean to start crying after Kasai left, but it felt like her new default mode when her guard was let down. Even if it was in public if felt good to let go for a bit.
"Mai." She closed her eyes and sighed knowing who it was before she turned her head.
"What? " Was all Mai had the energy to respond and wiped her eyes gingerly.
"May I sit?" Naru asked and Mai sighed but nodded. Her gaze remained out the window not wanting to observe whatever expression her boss was currently wearing. Knowing full well that whatever it was would have a tremendous effect on her current mood.
'I'm surprised he cared enough to follow me here, and he even used some of his manners. Maybe I should tell him off more often.' Mai considered.
"I thought I made it clear that you didn't have to babysit me." Mai said relieving herself from the ice pack for a few moments.
"You made it quite clear actually." He responded noting the size of the bruise she wore.
"Then why are you here? Finally come to the realization that I'm more trouble than I'm worth? Let me guess. I'm fired." Mai laughed hollowly.
"For someone who supposedly enjoys working for SPR, you speak about me firing you quite often. Do you no longer want to work for my company?" Naru questioned and Mai was silent for a few moments before replying.
"Not at all. I do love SPR. It has changed my life in the most wonderful ways, and given me a family and relationships I thought I could never have again." Mai replied and was even able to smile a bit.
"Then is it me? Do you detest being around me so much that you are hoping I'll fire you?" Naru asked again and Mai picked up the ice pack and applied it carefully.
"No, as much as I want to hate you sometimes, I can't. Evidently, I wouldn't have learned everything I have about ghost hunting if I hadn't met you. I also wouldn't have met any of the others or had any of the great adventures I've had either. As you've heard me say twice now it's quite the opposite actually. Even though you parade yourself around like a narcissist asshole; you actually do care more than you're willing to admit." Mai replied still keeping her full attention to rain outside.
"Perhaps it was the case with the poltergeist who imitated your father. If I'm correct that was the beginning of the change we've all observed in your behavior." Naru questioned further.
'Leave it to you to stomp right through a sensitive topic.' Mai thought at the researcher's mention of the previous case.
"When you take a life, it never leaves you, especially when it's the very man who brought you into this world. No one deserves to have their life and chance of redemption taken from them. No matter how far we think they've gone because we're only humans and have no right to lay ultimate judgment on one another. Besides, I can still remember when he was kind to mom and me; the times when he still loved us. I don't think I'll find my peace with it, but then again I don't think I deserve too." Mai said allowing more hot tears to fall from her eyes.
"Don't be an idiot. You were only a child. Mai, you can't possibly justify blame when your rationality was lacking. I have no doubt that you had no intention of killing your father, and thought only of aiding your mother. Besides he most likely would have killed you and your mother if you hadn't stopped him and then we wouldn't even be having this conversation." Naru reasoned and Mai let her eyes look at his for the first time.
"You'll have to teach me how to do that one of these days." Mai said and laughed wiping her eyes for the millionth time.
"And what is that?" He asked his eyes wandering hoping to catch the eyes of the waiter.
"The way you comfort someone while also stomping all over their self-esteem. It's probably one of the weirdest quirks there is about you. Second only to your love for magic tricks." Mai said noticing his plight with the waiter and she waved her hand and got his notice.
"Hey, how may I help you sir?" the waiter asked whipping out his notebook out.
"Two earl greys, one with cream and sugar the other without. " He ordered and the waiter nodded.
"How's the ice going? Do you need a refill?" The waiter asked and Mai shook her head.
"It's still pretty cold so I think I should be alright. Thank you for asking." Mai said giving him another smile as he headed back into the kitchen. Soon Mai felt a hand on her chin and Naru was observing the bruise on her face. He traced his hand over it and pressed into it gently.
"Hey! Oww Naru!" Mai said as she tried to swat his hand away but he caught her wrist and looked into her eyes. Mai challenged his gaze for a moment, but then scoffed and looked away blushing lightly.
"It's not as bad as it looks, but it should be gone in a week or two with proper care." He said removing his hand and leaning back into his seat.
"Don't you get all buddy buddy with me mister. I still have several bones to pick with you, and you are going to hear me out." Mai said pointing her finger and following by crossing her arms.
"Why do you think I'm here? Pick away." Naru replied flatly.
'Is that really why he's here?' Mai thought squinting her eyes suspiciously at the boy.
"I understand you can't have your crazy assistant going off the deep end, but you've got to give me some room. Ask me when you're going to make a decision regarding my life like the move or forcing me to do study session with Yasuhara." Mai complained.
"You forced my hand in both cases since you were neglecting your health and your studies. When you are back on your feet and have your education figured out, you are free to go. Besides, that was the doing of Monk and Matsuzaki who are also willing to house you. However, they both have more dubious work schedules and live far away from your school. Next complaint." Naru said resting his head on his fist boredly.
"What? What do you mean next? So I have no say in my life decisions anymore, and you are going to rule over me like some dictator?" Mai argued.
"Mai, you gave me two examples, neither of which were valid in proving your point. Yes, if there is a situation where I believe your council is necessary, I will ask for it. Next." Naru said again as the waiter came over with the tea.
"Thank you." Mai said hurriedly knowing that Naru wouldn't thank the boy. Naru pushed the lighter of the two teacups toward her and started to blow on his cup of tea.
"Is that all then?" Naru asked barely giving Mai anytime to make more complaints.
"My suspension from work!" Mai said fiercely.
"If you reflected on your behavior not only toward me, your boss, but towards the other members of the team, not to mention the client; I do believe that I was quite valid in the punishment you were delivered. Next." Naru said again angering the girl even more.
"UGH! He's so infuriating!" Mai thought as she blew on her tea and fought the urge to strangle him.
"What about you? Do you have any complaints about me since you're being so confrontational today?" Mai asked raising her eyebrow.
"You are coping terribly with Keiko's death and it's having a negative effect on your work ethic and ability to make smart choices. Is there something you are unable to let go? "Naru said bluntly causing Mai's heart to drop into her stomach.
'Of course, he would notice! He's a stupid insensitive genius. Pshh… like he has any room to lecture about shitty coping skills. The kid still wears nothing but black.' Mai thought pondering her next words carefully.
"Yes, witnessing a murder can do that to a person. It's just that I found some comfort after my parents died, and I forgot how bad it hurts to lose someone you love. I don't feel comfortable getting close to anyone right now. I'm too scared." Mai admitted looking directly into her teacup and running her hands through her hair and gripping her roots roughly.
"Psychologically speaking it makes sense that you'd be averse to attachment after so many losses, but keeping your track record in mind you aren't someone who takes typical emotional long routes." Naru responded making Mai looked at him in confusion.
"What does that mean Professor?" Mai asked sarcastically.
"It means I'm sure you'll bounce back because you have in the past. Until then you will have the support of SPR." Naru said sipping his tea.
Mai sat and looked at him, and felt as if she was seeing him for the first time.
He was being slightly awkward, so nerdy, full of himself, inquisitive, and most importantly he was so kind. Even if he never overtly said that he cared for her wellbeing, he was able to show it through his actions. Mai was thankful and couldn't help the well of emotion that overcame her suddenly as she chocked a sob causing her boss to look somewhat alarmed.
"Did I say something upsetting?" He asked furrowing his brow, but somehow looking even more handsome. Mai laughed as she tried to stop herself from making a bigger fool of herself in front in public.
"No- hiccup- the opposite actually. I'm just very happy to have you around –hiccup- which for some reason –hiccup- makes me cry even more." Mai admitted as she laughed at her own stupidity. If Mai weren't wiping her eyes she'd be able to notice the warm smile Naru had on his face when he looked up from his tea to the girl he happened upon in an abandoned building next to her school.
'As am I.' Naru thought genuinely.
Long time no see reader. Therefore in my absence I give you fluff! Enjoy and thank you for all the ratings and reviews!Enjoy your day!