Harry and Penny were met outside by Mr Weasley who was thrilled by the news Harry had been cleared. They made their way upstairs, with Harry sniggering at just about anything. That was until they came face to face with Lucius Malfoy once more. Both Mr Weasley and Harry eyed the tall wizard with hatred as he looked down his nose at Harry with a cold sneer. Penny could fill the rage radiating off Harry as images of the graveyard flashed across his mind.
"Patronus Potter." Lucius drawled, his voice reminding Penny so much of Draco's. He taunted both Harry and Mr Weasley, but although his eyes drifted over Penny and Juno, he didn't speak of them.
"What are you doing here, anyway?" Harry asked Lucius Malfoy. Penny snorted audibly.
"Buying his way into the Minister's bed chambers yet again I suspect." Penny goaded, cackling slightly as Fudge looked furious. Although Lucius kept his face composed, Penny could see how tight his jawline had become. "Come on." Penny said quickly under her breath leading Harry and Mr Weasley past them before calling over her shoulder to her uncle. "Oh and Lucy dearest, be sure to give my father my regards, when you report back to him like a good boy." She taunted, Harry letting out a loud laugh, whereas Mr Weasley ineffectively hid his with a cough. She saw Lucius' hand twitch on the cane that concealed his wand, her own hand clenched on her wand, should he draw it. Instead he just glowered after her, his eyes blazing. Penny felt a squirm in her gut but she suppressed it, strutting into the lift and mashing the button repeatedly.
Mr Weasley and Harry had made a few unflattering comments about Fudge and Lucius as they made their way out of the Ministry, Penny watching bemused as Harry turned his money bag upside down into the golden statue. He grinned widely as he did a comical leap off the fountain, his goofy happiness making Penny smile despite herself, even as she shook her head at him, Juno's coarse scales rubbing against her face. She was acutely aware of the stares the three of them were attracting.
As they ascended back to the surface, Penny persuaded Juno to enter the travel tube, Penny's shoulders aching from carrying her, and Juno being too lethargic to trail after them. Both Mr Weasley and Harry looked suspiciously relieved on seeing the serpent put out of sight.
The three of them strolled along the roads, Harry making jokes as Mr Weasley excitedly commented on various Muggle items as they walked. At one point they had to shift closer together to allow a group of people coming the other way to pass. Feeling Harry's hand brush against hers, Penny felt her stomach drop slightly as he retained contact tentatively. Penny glanced at him, noticing a red flicker behind his eyes when their eyes met. Penny half blinked before looking away from him, her gaze along the path ahead.
The next moment the group had past them, and Penny took a large step in front of Harry, breaking the contact, her shoulders hunching slightly away from him as she strode ahead. Harry scratched his nose as Mr Weasley continued his rambling, oblivious.
On returning to Grimmauld Place, the occupants were all relieved to hear about Harry being cleared and Mrs Weasley put on a large spread for lunch in celebration. Clearly everyone had been informed of her return now, as nobody appeared surprised to see her, although Ron didn't look overjoyed. Penny had sat alongside Ginny and Hermione, helping herself to some mash potato after Ron conveniently filled everyone's plate but hers.
"Course, once Dumbledore turned up on your side, there was no way they were going to convict you." He said happily as Penny felt her jaw clench.
"Yeah, he swung it for me." Harry said, Penny noticing a slight bitterness in his voice that made her feel a sympathetic rush of affection. A second later she saw Harry's hand jump to his scar, earning a worried look from Hermione. "Penny's witness statement helped too." Harry added quickly, badly concealing an extra wince of pain. Ron made a noise of contempt.
"I guess it was nice of Persephone to take time from her visits to You Know Who to attend your trial, you know, given it only happened because of her." Ron said resentfully, getting a warning look from Harry and an intake of breath from the room. Even Ginny and the twins froze amidst their celebratory war dance to look rapidly between Ron and Penny.
"Ronald that's very rude!" His mother berated him crossly, but her glance at Penny betrayed a sense of unease. The room seemed to be tensed in anticipation as Penny took a long drink, watching him coldly.
"It was, wasn't it? Shame, I was in the middle of suggesting to my father about employing an army of Acromantulas trained to seek out lanky spotty gingers." Penny said dryly as the twins and Ginny sniggered loudly, the tension in the room broken. "I can only hope he took my suggestions on board." She finished taking another swig of drink. Ron scowled deeply turning back to Harry, his ears a bright shade of red. "I bet Dumbledore turns up this evening, to celebrate with us." Ron said as Penny rolled her eyes. She hadn't told anybody the details of her fight with the Headmaster, and neither it seemed, had Tonks or Sirius. Suddenly not hungry, she excused herself and left the kitchen, finding Juno in the dusty drawing room, and settling with a book next to her. Kreacher had found the young witch and hastily began cleaning the room around her.
The next couple of weeks were fairly mundane, Penny avoiding Harry as best she could, helped by Mrs Weasley who frequently paired her up with Ginny to clean various rooms and objects. Not that Penny did a great deal of cleaning, Kreacher often jumped enthusiastically onto whatever she was meant to be helping with. Sometimes Ginny allowed it, usually when she herself fancied a break, but other times she would glare at Penny with such intensity Penny would meekly snatch up her cloth and scrub. Even then, Ginny had a tendency to go over whatever Penny had already cleaned, earning a scowl from the taller witch.
Sirius had become increasingly sullen, snapping at everyone, including Penny. Penny sometimes snapped back with a sarcastic comment, earning a scowl from the dark wizard, but mostly she just ignored it. Watching him skulk off to shut himself away with Buckbeak yet again, she felt a degree of sympathy. He too, was not inclined to remain trapped indoors unable to take action. In a way she both admired and detested his restraint.
Fred and George still experimented away from the watchful eye of their mother, Penny occasionally dropping by to be nosy and offer her opinion. They had tried to goad her into talking about her absence, receiving only quips and sarcastic comments in response.
Members of the Order came and went, some of them speaking to Penny, others avoiding her gaze fearfully. Mundungus, in particular, seemed very jumpy and tended to make a hasty exit whenever she tried to converse with him. Dumbledore probably scared him silly too, Penny thought, her chest tightening a little. The dinner conversations often wondered onto the topic of the Headmaster, grating on Penny's nerves as the usual nauseating comments were made about him. One evening she could stand it no longer and left abruptly to retreat to her favourite seat in the drawing room, lounging along it. Opening a book, she ran a loving finger along Juno's fresh scales, the serpent finally having shed a couple days earlier. Aside from the occasional rattle of the writing desk in the corner, it was a peaceful escape.
Some time later her peace was ruined by the sound of footsteps, too loud to be Kreacher, but too light to be Sirius. A hand appeared across the door frame, knocking gently before Lupin looked into the room. Penny raised her eyes briefly, a little taken aback seeing him before lowering her eyes back to the book.
"Afternoon, Penny." He said gently, finding a small chair and moving it to sit across from Penny. "A decent place to hide from everyone I must say." Lupin commented.
"And yet here you are." Penny replied drily, making Lupin chuckle.
"Fair point." He concurred. "But as I keep saying to Sirius, it is often those who avoid company who need it most."
"And I expect he heartily agreed" Penny replied. Lupin chuckled again but watched her silently for a moment. Penny raised her eyes, scowling at his expression.
"Why do people's comments about Dumbledore irk you so much?" He asked abruptly, a flicker of surprise across Penny's face. She stared at her book a moment longer before sighing in defeat, closing her book on her thumb to save her page.
"What could possibly be infuriating about people worshipping the very ground he walks on?" Penny challenged.
"I suppose it would be, having seen a less than perfect side to him." Lupin said softly. Penny gave him a searching look, to which he looked back calmly. "If Tonks had not told me everything, Sirius would have." He explained. "I know you ran away because he attacked you –"
"He didn't just attack me, he tried to kill me!" Penny interrupted furiously, Juno hissing startled at her outburst. "He admitted it!" Penny went on, it seemed something in Lupin's calm nature had caused a dam to break within her, a tsunami of frustrated thoughts pouring from her mouth. "He admitted it in front of Tonks and Sirius, and they did nothing! Said nothing! And then I have to walk around being treated like a criminal or a badly behaved toddler whilst they swoon over him like he's the Messiah that craps Galleons!" She rambled on, on her feet as Lupin remain sat, watching her with an infuriatingly kind expression. Juno watched her mistress silently too, her tail flicking a little. "Never mind the Ministry punishing me for my mother's crimes! Never mind I came back and faced both him and the Ministry for Harry's sake! Never mind I am in as much danger as Harry! No! Just should sit down and be a good little girl like always, let the adults keep their secrets, sit down whilst Voldemort has Narcissa and Draco, just sit and do nothing!" Penny finished launching her book across the room where it bounced off the opposite wall with a clunk. Penny made an irritated noise as she looked after her book, summoning it back to her hand. Lupin's eyes widened at the wandless magic but recovered himself and began to speak as Penny flopped back onto her long seat wearily. She rubbed Juno's head reassuringly, who pushed her head against Penny's hand affectionately.
"If Dumbledore had tried to kill you, we both know you would be dead." He started, looking at Penny meaningfully as she went to protest. "You know it's true. Not that it makes it justified, far from it. Dumbledore is an incredible wizard and a remarkable man, but a man he is. And like all men, sometimes his emotions can impair his judgement. I am sure you can relate." Lupin said, the corners of his mouth twitching as Penny shot him daggers. "And whilst they may have kept their cool in front of you, if you think for one moment Sirius and Tonks didn't have a lot to say about what happened, you don't know your cousins very well." Lupin went on. "Tonks may not have the typical Black hair trigger temper, but she is certainly a force to be reckoned with." He said with such fondness Penny stared at him. Her eyebrow raised at his glazed eyes looking into the distance with a smile on his lips.
"The wolf speaks of his desired mate." Juno commented, Penny suppressing a giggle as Lupin looked around abruptly and cleared his throat. A small hint of pink on his cheeks as he hastily spoke on. "Besides, it would appear you also chose not to tell your peers about what really happened. Why was that?" Lupin asked. Penny considered for a second before answering.
"I didn't want them to freak out and do something dumb." Penny replied eventually.
"Exactly." Lupin said nodding. "Sometimes, it's better for people to think their leader is infallible, else chaos erupts." He sighed tiredly. "What are you reading anyway?" He asked gesturing Penny's book. They spoke at length about Dark Creatures and defensive magic.
"It is curious, that you are still unable to produce a full Patronus." Lupin commented.
"I suppose it is." Penny responded airily, as if it was of no real interest to her. "But I wouldn't want to be infallible now would I?" Penny joked as Lupin considered her.
"It's obviously not a lack of power that hinders you. Nor, despite what others and yourself may think, does it somehow mean you are evil." Lupin said firmly, Penny grimacing slightly. "The Patronus Charm requires focus on nothing but pure happiness. Perhaps a mind like yours, somewhat struggles to block out distracting thoughts and feelings." Lupin said wisely.
"Why do you always look at me like that?" Penny said sharply. Lupin blinked at her tone, his eyebrow raising slightly.
"Like what?"
"Like you pity me." Penny shot back. "I have been looked at many ways, sometimes anger, mostly fear and sometimes admiration. But nobody looks at me with pity" She said the word as if it tasted foul. "the way you do."
"I know what it is to be looked at with fear and hatred, Penny. People have looked at me that way most of my life." He said gently. "I know what it is to fear what we are capable of, to fear harming others whilst we are not in control. I know that's why you push everyone away so much. Most of all Harry." He said, Penny's expression hardening.
"You might think you understand me in every way, but you don't." Penny replied tartly. "Now if you don't mind, I already have one animal to keep me company." She gestured Juno "I don't need another." A wounded expression crossed the older man's face. Penny felt a deep stab of guilt in her gut as he stood up and went to leave. "I don't push Harry away to keep him safe." She confessed to Lupin's back, who turned in the doorway. "I mean, I do. But its not the only reason." She chewed her tongue a little. "I can't stand the way he looks at me." She said looking away from Lupin as he made his way back into the room.
"What do you mean?" Lupin asked gently as he resumed his seat.
"He looks at me like….like I am the most amazing thing he has ever seen." Penny said wincing.
"Erm… I am not sure why that is a bad thing if I am honest." Lupin replied.
"Well…I'm not. And…I'm never going to be. He sees this perfect amazing girl, but it's not me. He doesn't see me, not as I really am. Merlin knows I have my flaws, but he just doesn't see it. It's a lot to live up to, you know? His expectations." Penny went on lamely trying to explain herself. "I can't be the girl he thinks I am, and he is only going to get hurt every time I break his illusion."
"You want someone who truly understands you and accepts every part of you?" Lupin suggested to which Penny nodded. "Understandable."
"Plus, Harry, he's…he's a bit much, you know?" Penny said, running her hand up the back of her hair. "He's an amazing guy, he really is…but he's a little intense." Penny confessed. Lupin smiled a little.
"Like he isn't looking for a girlfriend, he's looking for a wife." Lupin said with a chuckle.
"Exactly!" Penny confirmed.
"Well you may want to tell him how you feel." Lupin suggested. "I have no doubt it will hurt him, but the sooner he knows the sooner he can heal. You know as well as I do, he'll never move on if he thinks there is still a chance." He concluded wisely, Penny pouting as she looked sideways at him. Lupin stood and nodded politely, leaving Penny to think. Although she knew his words to be true, it didn't mean she wanted to hear them. Her thoughts drifted to Luna, another who told unashamed truths in soft tones. She smiled slightly to herself as she wondered what the curious girl had gotten up to this summer.
With that thought she ran a gentle hand down Juno's scales and resettled with her book, her lips twitching as she recalled the blonde's hysterical laughter at being called a barn owl, last time they had spoken. It seemed so long ago.