AN: I really really really want to hear from you guys!Your thoughts, what you think is going to happen, if you're liking the story or not. Etc. Etc.
I really enjoyed this chapter for all of the dialogue between Meredith and her friends plus some fun Meredith/McSteamy dialogue. I always loved their friendship and wanted to see more of it on the screen. Anyways, we have an angry Derek and an angry Meredith who are fighting the feelings they still have with one another coupled with random sex that's leaving them more confused than ever.
Mad Woman
And you'll poke that bear 'til her claws come out
And you find something to wrap your noose around
And there's nothing like a mad woman
It's been seven days since Jackson told me about my mother's diagnoses. I sat on it. I knew I should call, knew I should be there, knew I should be doing something more. I was an intern, a grunt, a nobody at the hospital. Interns couldn't just leave and fly across the country for their sick mother's. I could tell the Chief, but my mother didn't even want me knowing and somehow the idea of telling him, felt like the ultimate betrayal. My mother is an incredibly private woman. Plus, I'm an intern. And interns don't take time away. They answer pages. They work 24/7. They don't take time away to fly across the country, sick mother or not.
So instead, I sat at our table at Joe's at the end of a 48-hour shift. We should be sleeping but, it's 9 pm and we're young and all high off surgery. I was with my people. Alex, Izzie, Cristina, and George. Bailey's interns. Each other's persons. The bond we've been forming was the only good thing I had going for me. Somehow, I had already screwed up at work, with being kicked off neuro's service. I knew eventually, Derek would have to let me back in as he was truly unable to kick an intern out of an entire specialty, but it would be a while. Plus, I wasn't exactly itching to see him either. Just because he's angry doesn't give him the right to say to me what he said.
Cristina and I had already enjoyed two tequila shots and she was fishing us a third from Joe. I needed it. And truthfully, so did she. She had something going on that I couldn't put my finger on, but she was extra secretive and private. We were the same in that way, we both held tightly, bone crushingly tightly onto our secrets.
"What should we cheers to this round?" I asked when she made it back over and set my shot on the table. We had been cheering to the most random things the past hour and as we got more inebriated, the subject of our excitement got weirder and weirder.
"To Good Sex" Izzie piped in eyeing a 5th year resident named James that she had the hots for. She wouldn't join us in drinking tequila, but she did hold up her beer.
"To good sex" Cristina raised her glass. I sat there watching Cristina throw her shot back and Izzie gulp down a huge chug of beer.
"Oh come on, don't tell me you haven't had good sex? I've seen you leave with a couple guys here and at least one of them had to be good." Cristina told me hardly with a laugh.
I rolled my eyes. So not going there right now.
"I haven't had sex in 3 months. 3 freaking months" Izzie replied looking at me with a knowing look. I wasn't ready for it to get out to everyone yet about me and Derek and the random sex in my parent's old house on their living room floor.
"I could help you with that." Alex told her with a smirk
"Ewww" Crristina and I said at the same time
"Sorry, I don't sleep with evil spawns" Izzie replied, and George laughed. Him and Alex always had a rivalry.
"What's going on between you and Torres, Georgie?" Alex mocked knowing they were going through something weird. They haven't been dating long enough to call it a rough patch, but things were tense between the two of them.
"And, that's my que to leave." George said getting up from the table, grabbing his beer and making his way over to another group of friends. He had a great relationship with most people in the hospital and had multiple friend groups. The rest of us weren't like him. Cristina barely made friends with us, Izzie was an acquired taste, Alex could be downright repulsive, and I just wasn't that likeable in my opinion. Plus, I had all the secrets. Friends typically want to know your secrets and I don't supply them willingly.
"Oh come on George. Just ignore him" Izzie called but it was too late, he already made his way over to a group of nurse friends.
"Pussy" Alex stated, and Izzie punched his arm
"We're being supportive Alex" Izzie told him sternly.
"You hate Torres." Alex reminded her
"I don't hate Callie. I've just seen way way too much of her." Izzie said with a laugh, and I laughed with her.
Callie Torres has stalked around my house naked for the past month and Izzie was not kidding about seeing too much of her. I've seen too much of her. I'm not usually one to say anything though because my life, messy enough and who am I to judge.
"That's hot" Alex stated.
"In your dreams evil spawn" Cristina scoffed.
Izzie and I laughed. Cristina's sarcasm and biting personality served as a comic relief a lot of time and I was grateful for it.
In the midst of genuinely having a good and much needed night with my friends, I suddenly felt the energy change and I knew he was here. I looked at the door that just chimed and saw him and Rose entering the bar. I quickly downed my shot. I was going to need it.
"McDreamy alert." Izzie told me with wide eyes.
Alex and Cristina gave her a weird look and she quickly resolved into a bad lie "Oh, I uhh had an awkward encounter with him the other day. It's nothing." Izzie countered looking at me nervously.
"Oh juicy. Spill." Cristina demanded
"No really, it's nothing." Izzie stated to which I could hear Cristina and Alex prodding her in the background to spill whatever juicy info they thought she had on the hot shot attending. I was tuned out though. My thoughts and my eyes were on Derek. On how we left things. On him calling me a whore.
His eyes pierced mine for a second and I challenged him. I could see the exhaustion and hatred that occupied his beautiful blue orbs. Our eyes lingered on each other's for a second too long before he tore his gaze away and grabbed Rose's hand as they made their way up to the bar.
I could see Mark Sloan, Dr. Bailey, and some of the other attendings gathered at a table a small distance from ours. He likely would be sitting with them. I didn't care though or at least that's what I told myself.
"Why are there no other bars near the hospital? I mean we are surgeons, and we need options." I said to the table clearly feeling the effects of all the tequila at once and feeling anger at seeing Derek.
"We could open one!" Christina chimed nodding along as if it was a great idea.
"When would we have time to open a bar? The hospital owns all our asses. Every time, I take my pants off, I swear written across my ass is going to be Property of Seattle Grace Hospital." Alex replied.
Izzie grimaced "I really don't want to think about you with your pants off." Izzie told him
"My bar would serve nothing but tequila and no frilly drinks. If you order a Cosmo, you're banned. No explanations. No questions asked. Just banned. Thrown on your ass" Christina piped in. She was drunk. I loved drunk Christina.
"Single Malt Scotch and a Cosmo" we heard Joe shout from the bar, and I looked over to see Derek and Rose grab their drinks.
"Of course, McDreamy's scrub nurse drinks Cosmo's. I don't get why all the girl's go crazy over him; I mean he's dating a scrub nurse." Christina laughed and Alex chimed in with her. Izzie and I faked laughs before she brilliantly changed the subject back to our hypothetical bar.
As the hour passed, and it was my turn to buy drinks. While waiting at the bar, Mark Sloan came over to speak to me.
"I don't usually converse with interns but seeing as I'm drunk and can feel the tension in the air, I made an exception to come say hello." Mark told me with a smirk. I could see a glint of teasing in his eyes.
Mark and I had barely conversed since I started my internship. We always got along but he got Derek in the breakup, and I figured he didn't have a whole lot to say to me.
"McSteamy." I told him with a grin. At this point, I was drunk and couldn't stop myself. I did miss my friendship with Mark at times and finally he was standing right here willing himself to say hello.
"McSteamy. Well, you know I love that." He told me offering me a charming smile. Everything Mark said always had an underlying porny layer to it.
"Of course, you would." I said with a playful eyeroll as he told Joe he wanted a Single Malt Scotch. Joe told him he needed a second to refill ice out back.
Guess I would be standing here for a minute because Joe didn't get to my tequila shots before disappearing.
I felt a hard stare and looked over to see Derek looking at us. He was playing darts. Mark laughed at the sight "Oh, he is so picturing you." He told me.
"He lost the right to picture me when he called me a whore." I told him. Hoping that Joe would hurry up just a little so I could go back to my friends who were luckily amused in their own chatter and games to notice me and Mark Sloan speaking.
"Derek called you a whore?" Mark asked loudly. The table closest to the bar turned and looked at us. Great, a table of nurses. This info would be all over the hospital by tomorrow. I looked over to where Derek was, and his face dropped. I knew he heard Mark.
"Yup. He called me a whory whore whore." I informed Mark throwing a seething look at Derek.
"He used the words whory whore whore?" Mark teased
I gave him a look and he softened. "Well, if you're a whore that must make me-" he said lightly before I cut him off.
"The owner of the whore house." I finished for him with a laugh.
He threw his head back and laughed along with me. Derek seethed. People looked at our table including my friends who were now drunkenly eyeing us curiously.
"It's not going to last with her." He told me seriously seeming to sober up for a bit. Thank God Joe was back dumping the newly acquired ice into the ice bin.
"Thanks for the patience! Ah Meredith- sorry about that. Let me get those tequila shots, on the house for having to wait so long."
"Thanks Joe" I said with a lazy smile. I turned my attention back to Mark.
"I don't care if it does or doesn't" I told him smoothly.
He smirked at me "Sure you don't."
Out of the corner of my eye I watched Derek stalk back over to where Rose and some other attending were. He kissed her lightly on the cheek.
"Maybe you two should talk." Mark told me following my gaze.
"Maybe he should apologize." I countered.
"God, what's taking so long" Cristina said interrupting us and grabbing the drinks that at some point Joe had put in front of me.
Cristina and I knocked the shots back at the bar side by side.
"We didn't cheers." She said bummed out and clearly more drunk than all of us.
"What do you usually cheers to?" Mark asked with an eyebrow raised trying his best to seduce Cristina.
Cristina started laughing "Oh, you're not trying to - on me?" she laughed harder and harder.
Mark looked frustrated.
"I'm sorry but yeah no. No chance with me. Ever." She told him and I pulled her away.
"See ya" he called after us. I threw my hand up in response.
M&D M&D M&D M&D M&D M&D M&D M&D M&D M&D M&D M&D M&D M&D M&D M&D
I saw Mark making his way back over to where I sat with Rose once Meredith left. I pulled him aside over to the bar "What the hell were you doing talking to her?" I spat
"You called her a whore?" he questioned
I pinched the bridge of my nose. "Not exactly." I told him. He shook his head at me.
"What are you doing Derek?" he asked me, and I didn't have a response.
"You can't let her ruin you again, man. Find another outlet to take your anger out. Don't take it out on her. It won't be worth it." He told me sincerely.
I ran my hands through my hair when I felt Rose come up beside us.
"Is everything okay?" she asked peering at me sensing the conflicting emotion.
"Fine" Mark and I both concluded at the same time.
"Do you mind giving us a minute?" Mark asked a bit more harshly than he needed to, but Rose offered me a confused look "I'll just…. go order another drink" she muttered leaving us to finish our conversation.
"Sorry" he said to me thinking I was upset that he asked my girlfriend to leave.
I could feel Rose's eyes on me, but I brushed him off "It's fine… I just… I need time to process to think to-" I sighed drifting off. "She wasn't supposed to be here." I finished lamely.
"I know that, but she Is here." Mark told me sounding more and more like the voice of reason.
I nodded kicking back my drink.
"I don't know how to exist in Seattle with her here. She's everywhere. She's at the hospital. She's here at Joe's. She's-"
"She's what?" Mark asked
"She's infected my brain. I can't stop thinking about her. All the time. I think about her all the time. And I know it's wrong, but I… I don't know how to turn it off."
"You think about her all the time." Mark stated mostly to himself.
"Derek, what happened after the two of you left the bar last week?" Mark asked.
Guilt flashed on my face "Oh come on. You didn't" he stated looking at me like I was the stupidest person he'd ever seen.
"I did. We did." I told him quietly looking to see Rose starring straight at me. "I can't talk about this here. I need…. Some time. In the woods. On my land. I'm taking tomorrow. Clearing my head. Join me if you want. I just can't do this here." I stated and turned my gaze to where Meredith sat with her friends. Her back was to me, but I swore I suddenly smelled lavender as her perfect, infectious laugh filled the room. God, I would do anything to be the one making her laugh like that right now.
To Be Continued.