AN: Thank you so much for all the lovely reviews that you guys are leaving! They make my lil heart so happy :) So, what do we have in C6? Reading it back to myself, it feels like the end, but trust me when I say we're just getting started! This one is a little fluff, mainly Jane making up for all that time she fought her feelings for Maura...and Maura is finally home!
Eight hours.
Just eight hours until Maura is due to land in Boston, and Jane can barely contain her excitement.
She's taken the day off to do something special to surprise Maura - nothing too flashy, just a home-cooked meal for the two of them that she now begins to prepare with the help of Angela who leans against Maura's kitchen island, a brown bag of groceries clutched in her arms.
"I just couldn't believe it when you called this morning, I thought you'd forgotten about me."
"Ma, c'mon. I've been-"
"Busy, just like ya brother, I know. God knows you get your work ethic from me, ya father-"
"Ma! I asked you to help me cook, so help me. Did you get everything?"
"I got enough to feed half the state, and then some. I picked up some groceries for Maura too, with her coming home today. Oh, this is such a nice idea Janie, you're such a good friend."
Jane smiles at the mention of Maura's name, draining the last of her coffee and stacking her mug in the dishwasher. She'd spent any free time away from work nesting, as her mother would call it - fresh flowers in almost every room, new plants for the kitchen windowsill, bottles of Maura's favorite wine and beers for Jane stacked neatly together in the refrigerator along with macarons from a patisserie they frequent. Jane worries she's gone slightly overboard, but she doesn't care - she's determined to make up for lost time, and this is only just the beginning.
"What's got you in such a good mood?" Angela interrupts her train of thought and she shrugs, grabbing an apron and tying it around her waist.
"I'm about to be in a bad one if you don't set those down and help me."
"Alright alright. Unpack these, and get me a couple of bowls out - not the good china ones, Maura likes to serve in those-"
"Not mix in them, I know." Jane finishes the sentence for her, transferring groceries from the bags to the refrigerator. "What are we making?"
"Well, I thought we could rustle up a dip and some veggies, and I know tomorrow is gnocchi day but I thought we'd do it today instead. Maura loves my gnocchi ya know?"
"I know she does. Pumpkin?" Jane balances a pack of sliced pumpkin in her hand, holding it out for Angela to take from her.
"And sage. I was looking through some old recipe books from nonna and found this one I've been dying to try out, so I thought why not?"
"I want it to be perfect Ma, not an experiment."
"Have you ever not liked something I've made, huh? Tell me."
Jane's eye-roll is met with a flick of a kitchen towel and she yelps, twisting out of the way.
"You make some questionable stuff, remember the zucchini spag- ow!" She rubs her towel whipped arm, pouting.
"The one time I try to make something healthy..."
"Pasta is healthy. Vegetables posing as pasta? I'm glad nonna wasn't alive to see that."
Angela crosses her chest and then picks up a potato, throwing it to Jane who juggles it foolishly a few times, tongue poking out of her mouth in concentration.
"Hey! Quit messing around and start peeling. We got a feast to make."
They don't speak again for a while, Angela busy whipping up her magical ricotta dip and Jane concentrating on peeling potato skin rather than her own skin.
Cooking has always been a family affair, but for Jane it's a form of therapy - the set of clear instructions to follow, the rhythmic motions of chopping, peeling stirring...it's enough to shush her brain, even just temporarily. After that experience at school had almost ripped her apart, her relationship with her mother was fraught to say the least, and cooking together had helped mend their bond tremendously.
Jane looks up and Angela now, mouth turning up into a smile at the scattered, off-key singing she does whilst she cooks, interspersed with loud humming and the occasional curse thrown in for good measure.
"Mom!"
"What?"
"Do you have to do that? It's annoying."
"Do what baby?" Angela hums a couple of beats and Jane sighs, looking up from the chair she's curled up in, notebook open in her lap.
"That. I'm trying to concentrate."
"What are you doing?"
"Writing."
"Writing what?"
Jane lets out an exasperated groan, flipping the book from her lap onto the floor. Angela raises an eyebrow and then takes a pan off the gas, wiping her hands on a towel draped across her shoulder. She crosses the room and picks up the notebook before Jane can snatch it from her, taking a few paces backward and reading.
It had been Cassie's idea. Write down the things she can't say out loud, or the feelings she can't put into words for them to go through in their sessions together.
"What is this?" Angela asks and Jane stares down at the floor, not wanting to meet her mother's inquisition.
"It's for therapy. It's nothing really. Just...stuff."
"Why didn't you tell me you felt like this Janie?"
Met with silence, Angela takes a few steps forward until she's standing over Jane, then drops to her knees, reaching a hand out to stroke the top of Jane's head comfortingly. She's crying before she can stop herself, and Angela tilts her face up, her own vision clouded with tears.
"Nothing will ever make me hate you, Jane. You're my baby. I don't care who you are, or who you love, as long as you know that I love you, forever. It's a mother's job, and even if it wasn't I still would. Do you hear me?"
Jane nods and Angela wipes the tears from her cheeks gently.
"Your father didn't leave because of you. If he doesn't respect his daughter, then he doesn't have a place in this house, or in my life."
"Mom." Jane's voice wobbles and Angela coos quietly, pushing herself to her feet. She takes Jane's hands and pulls her up too, arms wrapping around her shoulders.
"You listen to me. I love you. You belong here. It's gonna be okay baby. We'll get through this, eventually, but for now, how about you put this down and help me with this damn chicken?"
They joke and fight and fall out on the flip of a dime, but if there is one thing that Angela has always provided for Jane and her brother's it's been a safe, caring haven to call home, no matter where they've ended up.
It's this thought and memory that propels her across the room, arms snaking around Angela's shoulders to bear hug her tightly from behind. She yelps in surprise, then relaxes into Jane's hug, twisting to her head to place a loud kiss on Jane's forearm.
"Thanks, Mom."
"For what? Cooking? You don't have to thank me, you know I love it."
"Yes for this, but also for...everything. You're the best, Ma."
"The best? Can ya tell your brothers? Can I get that in writing?" Angela cackles infectiously and Jane can't help but join, giving Angela one last squeeze before she moves back towards the potatoes she'd been mashing, blinking through thankful tears.
Jane decides, there and then, with a heart full of worth that when the time is right, Angela will be the first one she tells about everything.
Her. Maura. Them.
She can't wait.
Four hours to go.
She's been watching the clock all afternoon, annoying herself with her own impatience whilst she's tried to stay busy in hopes it'd make the time go faster. It'd worked so far, but now, as she tapes her hands ready to spar with the punch bag she's hung in the garage, she feels like time is passing at an agonizingly slow rate.
Four hours. An hour to workout, an hour to shower and change, and then as much time as it takes to drive to the airport and wait.
It feels like a lifetime.
She lifts the headphones from around her neck and places the cups over her ears, tapping into a workout playlist on her phone. Heavy metal blocks out all other sounds and she smiles to herself, rolling her neck a couple of times before she starts punching, the dull, satisfying thuds as she lands hit after hit triggering a flood of endorphins.
She feels...happy. Happier than she's ever felt, despite the permanent unease that exists within her, stirring when she least expects it.
It's always there - put there by years of bullying and intimidation and firmly cemented by her own fear and anxiety that words others had spat at her were true. She's not stupid - she knows that her life is different now, surrounded by people that love and admire and respect her, but there is still that tiny, doubtful voice scaring her into keeping her walls high and her mouth closed.
She's been compliant to her demons for far too long, afraid to be loud and proud, and for what? A life full of meaningless relationships with men she'd deemed socially acceptable, crushing and squeezing herself to fit into an image that she'd told herself she needed to portray to the world to get anywhere in life.
It's hard, but she's beginning to see it, and to feel it - little chinks in the steadfast armor she wears, shining a rainbow of love and light into the darkest corners of her very existence. It had always been there too, under the surface, held back by Jane's relentless persistence of slipping through life quietly, convinced that if she ever sought out the love of another woman she'd face nothing but persecution and humiliation once again.
And all this time, how utterly wrong she'd been.
She'd found Maura without even trying, unconsciously slipping into a relationship filled with joy, acceptance, hope, and love.
Unconditional, forever love.
Jane has never been so sure of anything in her life.
Two hours. One hundred and twenty-eight minutes, if the clock on Jane's dashboard is correct.
She's ridiculously early and she knows it, but if she has to anxiously pace she'd rather lap around the airport instead of wearing a trail into Maura's expensive, Persian living room rug.
Flipping down the mirror in her car she checks her appearance for what must be the twentieth time, pushing her curls behind her ears before tying her hair up entirely, and then shaking it down again seconds later.
Up? Down? Does it even matter? Will Maura even notice?
She sighs, pulling out a tube of lipstick and swiping it across her lips quickly before she studies her reflection closely, pouting and then scowling before folding the visor up.
She doesn't look anywhere near as good as Maura undoubtedly will, but she'll do.
Exiting the car, she makes a mental note of where she's parked and then follows the signs for arrivals, pushing her sunglasses up onto her head and heading straight for the nearest coffee cart in hopes of finding something strongly caffeinated to calm her nerves.
Jane is two coffees down, three thousand steps up and jittery when the large, electronic flight information board informs her that the flight she's been slyly tracking on her phone since it took off has arrived. She pops a mint just in case and then brushes her hands down across the deep purple sweater and black jeans that she's wearing, mind abuzz with excitement and anxiety as she approaches the correct gate, stepping into a throng of people waiting to greet their own loved ones.
She spots someone waving a welcome home sign, and a guy holding a bunch of flowers almost as tall as he is and she starts to panic at her own empty hands. Should she have brought flowers, or made a sign? She curses quietly to herself, wondering if she's got time to run to one of the gift shops across the lobby when the crowd around her begins to jostle and she dips away, gaze trained on the steady stream of passengers beginning to disembark.
She's pretty sure that her nerves have finally gotten to her when Maura steps through the doors, rolling her case forward with one hand and the other clutching her phone, fingertips quickly moving across the screen.
Her own phone vibrates in her hand and she opens the message, smirking proudly that she's truly managed to keep being here a surprise.
Just landed, on my way for a cab. What time will you be home?
She's tempted to send a message back but decides against it, tucking her phone into her back pocket and then taking a deep breath before she hollers, truly not caring at the confused glances in her direction.
"Maura!"
Hazel eyes lock onto her own and she can't help but grin manically, waving at the blonde who pauses suddenly, letting out a small laugh of disbelief before she begins to hurry towards Jane. Maura is barely through the waiting crowd when she abandons her suitcase and breaks into a run, launching herself into Jane's open arms with such a force that Jane has to steady herself to keep them upright.
"Ohmygod. Jane!"
"Surprise?"
"What are you doing here? I thought you were at work!" Maura's face is pressed so close against her neck that she can barely hear her, arms clutching Jane tightly to her.
"You didn't really think I'd let you take a cab, did you?"
Maura squeezes her hard and then pulls back, hands framing Jane's face as she presses kisses to her cheeks, the tip of her nose, then her forehead before ending with a kiss to the lips that melts away everyone and anything but the two of them. Jane's arms lock around Maura's hips and the happy moan that she exhales into Jane's mouth is like a drug that she just cannot get enough of.
She's still on a high thirty minutes later as they pull into Maura's driveway, Jane regretfully removing her hand from where it had rested across Maura's thigh, squeezing comfortingly as Maura had filled her in on what she'd learned at her conference, Jane trying her best to understand and nod in all the right places.
"Did you know that the bacterial cells in your body outnumber your human cells? Studies have shown there can be thirty-nine trillion bacterial cells compared to only thirty trillion human cells."
"Only? Wow. So I'm a walking infection, is that what you're telling me?"
"Actually, bacterial infections are usually a proliferation of a harmful strai-"
"Maura?" Jane interrupts, already out of the car and holding Maura's door open for her.
"Yes?"
"I've missed you so much that you're making bacteria sound sexy. Can we please, please go inside?"
"You don't have to go back to work?" Maura questions, unclipping her seatbelt and taking Jane's outstretched hand. She steps out of the car, watching as Jane retrieves her suitcase and handbag and wheels them to the front door, one hand gripping Maura's and pulling her along.
"I've taken the day off. I wanted to be here when you got back, I want to spend time with you. Unless you want me to go in?" Jane unlocks the front door and guides Maura in, kicking off her sneakers.
"No! No. I'm just...I suppose I'm not used to..." She trails off, scanning the room, "Peonies? My favorite."
"Pink, not red, coral, not yellow." Jane recites, encouraging a wide-eyed Maura towards the staircase, pecking her cheek with a chaste kiss, "I'm going to finish a few things off, you are going to go take a shower, get dressed in the comfiest clothes you can find, and come down in around thirty minutes, okay?"
When Maura doesn't answer, too dumbstruck at the effort that Jane has made just for her, Jane grabs a hand, bringing it to her lips and kissing softly.
"Okay?"
"Yes. Okay." Maura smiles and departs, Jane pausing for a few seconds to make sure she's really gone.
Satisfied that she's got a little time to prepare, she immediately sets to work laying out plates and cutlery on Maura's dining table, leaving just enough time to set up a playlist of songs she'd picked to play in the background and pour a tall glass of chilled wine. She's popping the lid off a bottle of Sam Adams for herself when Maura glides in, wearing Jane's aged BPD sweatshirt and a pair of fitted white shorts that are so short that Jane has to steady that glass of wine she's holding, afraid she's about to drop it.
"Wine?" Jane suggests hoarsely after a beat, transfixed as Maura takes it from her, sipping slowly.
"Thank you. Something smells amazing. You cooked?"
"I did, with a little help. Go sit, it's almost ready." She plates up a pile of steaming, fragrant gnocchi, adding a sprinkle of sage like she'd promised Angela she would and then joining Maura at the table.
"Jane. This is such a surprise. I don't know what to say."
"You don't have to say anything Eat."
They slip into a comfortable silence whilst they eat, stealing occasional glances at each other across the table. Every single time Maura's eyes capture hers, Jane feels her stomach flutter, something about the way that Maura just looks at her sending electric shivers down her spine. She's not sure how she's coped with Maura's absence, now she's sitting here in front of her - in fact, she's certain that she never wants to spend another night apart again.
Jane is wondering how to express this without sounding corny when Maura leans across the table, gathering their plates together.
"I can do tha-"
"I want to. You've done some much, Jane."
"I wanted to make it nice for you." Jane's flushes, feeling slightly self-conscious. As much as she wanted to impress Maura she hadn't wanted to make a big deal of it, Maura's happiness being the only thanks that she'd wanted.
"You did. You have. I'm in awe."
"Good. I mean, that you...like it?"
"I do."
"I...me too. I love being here. It means a lot, Maur. I figure I've done a really bad job of showing you how much I appreciate you, so I guess this is the start of me making up for lost time."
"Speaking of time...I have something for you." Maura's eyes glint mischievously and Jane narrows her own, tilting her head to one side in question.
"You do?"
"Mmhm. Wait here."
Jane chuckles, leaning back in her chair, "I'm not good with surprises, you know that?"
"Don't peek."
She listens intently, keeping her promise not to look as Maura clangs around the kitchen, followed by an unnerving silence. Footsteps pad softly towards her, and she waits until Maura pushes something small and hard into her hands before she opens her eyes.
"It's...a box?"
She turns the gift-wrapped box over in her hands, giving it a teasing shake before she delicately removes the metallic silver paper, heart in her mouth when she reveals a familiar logo. She knows what it is immediately. Months ago, she'd been flicking through one of Maura's fancy subscription magazines when she'd spotted the watch of her dreams - a Luminox Pacific Diver, black on black edition, priced way above any amount she'd ever consider spending on herself.
She'd folded the corner down in the magazine, intending to tease Maura that apparently she too had expensive taste, but she'd forgotten about it entirely, until now.
"Maura..." Jane breathes, pushing the gift wrap to one side and opening the presentation case with a click. She stares at it longingly, running her thumb across the bezel before she snaps the case shut, placing it on the table in front of her.
"How did you even...?"
"I have my ways. Try it on!"
"I can't take this Maura, it costs-"
"At least take it out and look." Maura gives her a few seconds before she impatiently opens the case up and retrieves the watch, turning it around to show Jane an inscription across the back. The small, neat handwriting that has been engraved is undoubtedly Maura's, and Jane traces the letters with a fingertip carefully, heart thundering in her chest.
Until the end of time.
"Maur. I..."
"Jane Clementine Rizzoli," Maura starts, leaning down to strap the watch to Jane's wrist and then tilting her arm back and forth to admire how good it looks before bringing her hands to gently turn Jane's face towards her own. "I love you. I have always loved you. I will always love you, until the end of time."
She smiles lovingly, dropping a kiss to Jane's lips before she leans back, searching Jane's face nervously.
Jane utters her name again, lost for words and on the verge of bursting into tears.
Maura loves her. Actually, truly loves her. It's not a wish or a dream. She knew it, deep down, but hearing it from Maura's own lips is something different altogether.
It's real. Really fucking real.
She needs no further encouragement as she tugs Maura down onto her lap, needs no motivation when Maura's gaze meets her own.
She's all in.
"I love you too."
