The heady mix of excitement and nausea as they step into the parking garage elevator the following morning makes Jane wonder if she's actually ready for this.
Being out. Loud. Proud.
She fidgets with the collar of her shirt, undoing and rebuttoning the top few buttons before she turns to observe her reflection in the mirror, groaning at her wild hair. She combs it down with her fingers, and she's trying to wrestle her ID from her pocket when Maura's hands cover hers, halting her movement.
Maura frees the badge, holding it out for Jane to take and then she rests her hands on Jane's shoulders, smoothing down her blazer. She runs her hands down Jane's arms, then presses two fingertips to Jane's left wrist, measuring her pulse.
"Accelerated heart rate, pupillary dilation. You're nervous."
"Just nervous? No obscure medical term? No neuro…cardiac…pathy?"
"I'm certain you made that word up." Maura smiles, taking Jane's hands in her own and squeezing softly. "We don't have to do this. I understand."
"The only thing you need to understand right now is that I'm not nervous about this." Jane gestures between them, smiling shyly as she does. "I'm feeling a little...exposed, you know?"
"I'm sorry. Is there anything I can do?"
"It's not your fault. Don't apologise."
Jane rests a hand on the small of Maura's back as the elevator doors slide open, her fingertips stroking small calming circles as they move through the pen towards Jane's messy desk. She clears a space for Maura to perch on the edge, motioning for Frost and Korsak to join them as she does.
"Well look at you two lovebirds." Korsak beams and Jane stares accusingly at Frost, hands firmly on her hips as he approaches.
"You told him?"
"I couldn't keep it from him. It's Vince. Come on." Frost shrugs, biting into the bagel that he's holding as he drops into Jane's desk chair, leaning back and looking up at them.
"Ah geez, I'm just made up for you. We should celebrate." Korsak sneaks an arm around Maura, giving her a quick squeeze before he does the same to Jane, grinning from ear to ear as he does.
"Look at him. Like a proud papa. Why'd you wanna deny him of this?" Frost mumbles through a mouthful, spraying crumbs in Jane's direction as he does. She swats at him playfully, lifting a foot to nudge the chair away from them.
"Alright. Cool it. People are looking."
Jane smiles and nods at the other officers around the room, expression turning to one of question as she realises some of them are beaming back at them, a little too knowingly for it to be a coincidence.
"Frost...I swear to god..."
"So maybe a few people mighta overheard..." A chill washes over Jane so quickly that she doesn't hear the rest of Korsak's sentence, ears ringing as she sits next to Maura on her desk.
They know. They all know.
She's dizzy as she braces herself, waiting for the sneers and dirty looks and whispered slurs.
Any minute now.
Her hands come to press against her thighs as she leans forward, eyes fixed on the ground, physically preparing herself for the barrage of abuse.
"What's going on here?"
She lifts her head, jaw set and ready for battle, zoning in on the gruff voice of Sean Cavanaugh as he comes into view, arms crossed over his chest defensively.
Here it comes.
Jane opens her mouth to speak and then thinks better of it, gaze flicking between the sea of faces around them.
It's better to stay quiet and take it. She'd learn that the hard way.
"You think I'm paying you all to sit around doing nothing? Save your gossip for the Robber and get to work. Now!"
Jane remains rooted to the spot as a rumble of chatter fills the room, unable to move even as Cavanaugh holds out an envelope towards her, shaking it impatiently when she doesn't take it.
"What's wrong Rizzoli?"
"Nothing, sir. I..."
"You've had your forty-eight hours. I've got the Deputy Chief of Police breathing down my neck about this. He's threatening to go to the press."
"What?" Jane is snapped from her stupor as Frost snatches the envelope from him, pulling out the letter and scanning it quickly.
"He can't do this. There's gotta be something you can do."
"Do you have an update for me?" Sean questions and Jane shakes her head miserably, consumed with guilt that she hasn't achieved what he's asked. "Then I have no choice. I'm sorry."
"This is bullshit and you know it." Frost crumples the letter in his hand, turning on his heel and walking away, muttering to himself as he goes. Cavanaugh sighs, turning to leave when Jane stops him, hand resting on his arm.
"Just give us till the end of the day."
"I can't. This has gone on long enough."
"C'mon. Don't make me beg. All I'm asking is a couple more hours. Give me until the end of the day and I'll have something for you. I swear it."
"You're pushing it Rizzoli." He checks his watch, then looks up at her, murmuring as he lowers his voice. "You have until I leave tonight. Don't make me regret it."
He turns on this heel, striding towards the stairwell and disappearing from view before Jane can reply.
"I have to go too. I'll see you later?" Maura kisses Jane's cheek, and when nobody reacts Jane looks around the room in disbelief, trembling as she retrieves her chair and sinks into it, a smile spreading across her face as she turns towards her desk.
Nobody is looking at them.
Nobody is talking about them.
Nobody cares.
"It's already old news. What did you expect?" Frost says, lifting the lid from the cardboard box in front of him and grabbing a handful of letters.
He and Jane are sitting on the floor of the evidence room, combing through everything they've collected so far for the investigation, double and triple-checking that they've not missed anything.
"I don't know."
"You're not the only same-sex relationship around here, you know that right?"
"You trying to tell me something?"
He rolls his eyes, laughing sarcastically. "You're a real joker. I'm just saying, it's nothing out of the ordinary."
"It is for me. I got so worked up, I was ready to come out fighting and…well, I got nothing to fight."
"It's a good thing. You should be happy."
"I am. Something just feels odd. It'll pass, I'm sure."
Jane spies the leather-bound journal that was the final push in her decision to open up, stroking a hand over it.
"We gotta catch this fucker, Frost. What are we not seeing? There's gotta be something."
"Maybe it getting out will help. Maybe someone will come forward."
"Or maybe it'll force them into a corner like a trapped rat and they'll double down on their kills. We've seen it before."
"Let's run this from the top. We've got two dead camp counsellors, and someone else dead that we know went to at least one of 'em. We've got threatening letters. We've got diaries. We've got photos."
"We don't have any prints. No partials, no hairs - absolutely no fuckin' trace." Jane adds, leaning against a metal evidence cage and flipping through a pile of various photographs they've collected so far. She stares at each face, lingering over every single one as she waits for a lightbulb moment, growing increasingly pissed off when it doesn't come.
"You think the school have anything to do with it? They were pretty resistant to handing these over." Frost questions, leafing through the printed transcripts.
"Nah. That's regular college bullshit. I wonder if Maura ever got those photos out of the necklace. You remember the ones I'm talking about?"
"How could I forget?" Frost mumbles, face screwing up in disgust. "Want me to go check?"
"I'll go." Jane gets to her feet quickly, dusting her pants off as she picks a path through the scattered papers around them.
"Oh, I bet you will. We're supposed to be focusing, not frolicking."
"Excuse me? I'm taking this very seriously. I'll be back soon - with coffee if you focus hard enough."
She opts for the stairs instead of waiting for the elevator, taking them two at a time as she heads to the morgue, humming a light tune to herself as she goes. She slips into the cold, dark room and towards Maura's dimly lit office, pausing to tentatively knock on the closed door.
"Come in."
"Hey. It's only me." Jane says with a smile as she lets herself in, closing the door behind her and crossing to Maura's desk. When she doesn't look up from the file she's reading, Jane stops to press a gentle kiss to the crown of her head, then flops down onto the leather couch as she waits for Maura to finish, content to quietly watch from across the room.
Jane is aware that Maura isn't sleeping properly lately - neither of them has been really, not since the note had been left on April's car. She can see the tiredness in the way that Maura sits, shoulders ever so slightly slumped as she leans over the report, letting out an exhausted groan as she signs the bottom of it neatly before she closes the file and adds it to the pile on her desk.
Jane offers a smile as Maura looks up, holds her gaze as she stands, rolling her neck with a soft groan. Blonde waves obscure her face as she stretches slowly and Jane shuffles forward, elbows resting on her knees.
"I didn't think I'd see you until later. Have you found something?"
"Well, that's kinda why I'm here."
"What do you need?"
"That locket you found on Sarah Taylor…any luck on the photos?"
"No. I sent it off for analysis though, and they found a name and date on the back of one of the pictures."
"What? When?" Jane's eyes widen, interest piqued. Could this be the breakthrough they're looking for?
"They called right before you came down actually. Let me pull it up." Maura twists the laptop that sits on her desk towards Jane, bending at the waist as she leans down to tap the keyboard a few times. "Here we go. They couldn't confirm the whole name but found an L and a Y. Date is July or June twenty-eighteen. It's not a lot, I'm sorry."
"Not a lot? It's more than we have right now Maur. Thank you."
"You're welcome." Maura turns and Jane pats the empty seat on the couch next to her, gesturing for Maura to sit. She does and Jane leans in to kiss her, twisting sideways so that they're facing.
"I also have an ulterior motive. I wanted to talk to you."
"About what?"
"How are you holding up? You're not sleeping. I've noticed."
"Do I look that awful?" Maura chuckles, self consciously bringing her hands to her face to press fingertips against the barely visible bags under her eyes.
"You look beautiful, always. But I know you're worried."
"Yes."
"Wanna talk about it?" Jane kisses her again, cupping the side of Maura's face gently as she does.
"Mmm." Maura sighs as she wipes her smeared lipstick from Jane's lips with a thumb. "I'm concerned."
"About?"
"April. You. Me. I haven't been able to get the note off my mind."
"I had a feeling it might be something to do with that."
"It's silly really."
"It's not. It's perfectly valid."
Jane's heart sinks as Maura's eyes fill with tears and she reaches out, clasping Maura's hands in her own.
"Listen to me. I will do everything in my power to protect you, now and always. You're my whole world, Maur. I'm not gonna let some psycho ruin that. And you heard April, she's tough. It's gonna be okay. Okay?"
"I…can't help but wonder if we're perhaps too close to this investigation. All of us."
"We're gonna find him."
"I'm scared, Jane."
"I know baby." She brings their hands to her lips, pressing a kiss to the back of Maura's, one after the other. "But I won't let anything happen to you. I promise."
They have one hour left on the clock when they find what they've spent the last three hours searching frantically for.
Jane had been laid face-down on the couch of their secret, fourth-floor office, thinking of all the ways she'd failed the victims and their families when Frost had burst in, panting hard. She'd twisted to face him, pushing herself upright as he'd thrust a battered yearbook towards her, barely able to speak through sharp gasps.
"I…took…the…stairs."
"You gotta hit that gym Frost. A bad guy ain't gonna wait for you to catch up."
"Look." He points at the book, reaching out to flip the pages until he finds the right one, tapping impatiently to a picture of a girl that Jane recognises as Sarah. "Look!"
"I'm looking. What am I looking at? That's Sarah Taylor, right?"
"Yes. Look at her shirt. It's the one we keep seeing."
"Okay, so they shared clothes...and?"
"Turn the page. Next class."
She does, eyes flicking from one smiling face to the next as she tries to work out what she's looking for.
"There. That girl. Look!"
"Jeez, Frost I'm trying. Why don't you just tell me wha-"
"Look at her neck."
Jane stares at the photograph of a blonde-haired girl, immediately drawn to the locket necklace that hangs around her neck, glinting in the camera flash.
"Lily Wright."
They couldn't confirm the whole name but found an L and a Y. Date is July or June twenty-eighteen.
Maura's words echo in Jane's mind as she turns the yearbook to check the date on the front, breath catching in her throat when she sees that it is indeed dated twenty-eighteen.
"It's her, isn't it? She's the one in Sarah's diary."
Frost pulls the dog eared polaroid from his pocket, holding it out for Jane to see. She holds it next to the photograph in the yearbook, comparing both of the subjects. Whilst she can see the similarities, there are also differences that she can't ignore and she shakes her head tiredly, handing both the book and the photo to Frost.
"I don't know Frost. Her hair is darker in the book."
"Like girls don't dye their hair?"
"Her face is...different."
"Jane, c'mon. The name matches."
"It's a partial. We'd be making an assumption."
"What else do we have right now, huh? This is the best we've got."
Jane grits her teeth whilst she considers their options - he's right, really. They have nothing else, and she'd rather chase a lead and hit another dead, embarrassing end than go to Cavanaugh empty-handed.
"Okay. You're right."
"I could kiss you. Get up, let's go." Frost laughs, gripping her hand and pulling her to her feet quickly. She grumbles tiredly, stumbling as she gathers up the mess she'd made. She's on his heels, raring to go before her cell phone chimes with the ringtone she has set for Maura and she snatches it from her belt, answering quickly.
"Hey. You okay?"
"Yes. I'm leaving. I understand you have a deadline, but...maybe we could go together?"
Jane glances at Frost and the book and the photo, torn between staying a little longer or taking Maura home for some much-needed respite.
"I know I'm probably being overdramatic, but I'm not fond of the idea of going home to an empty house."
"No, you're not. Wait in the car for me. I'll be down soon." Guilt twists Jane's stomach as she ends the call, snapping the phone back to her belt.
"I don't wanna be that person but...I promised Maura I'd leave at a reasonable hour today. Don't say anything but I think all this has touched a nerve, and I wanna try and make an effort, see if I can make it a little better."
"You don't need to explain. I get it. I'll take it to him, see what we can pull together. Go home." Frost shuts the door behind them as they leave, heading for the stairs as Jane approaches the elevators.
"Call me, if you get anything. I don't care what time it is Frost."
"I hear you. Get some rest." His voice fades as he departs and Jane steps into the waiting elevator, hitting the button for the parking garage impatiently until the doors close and she leans against the wall, nothing but the promise of a long, quiet evening with Maura holding her up.
If Frost is right, it'll mean that they're one step closer to ending this - one step closer to stringing up whoever is behind this and putting it behind them, for good.
She's lost in thought as the doors screech open and she steps out into the parking garage, idly daydreaming about her stalled proposal plans when a mix of familiar smells hits her and she stops, hand autonomously moving to unholster her gun.
Blood, and the faint gardenia scent of Maura's favorite perfume.
AN: A cliffhanger and a half, huh?! I've had a tough couple of weeks and honestly, the joy that you all bring to me through kind comments/messages/reviews is sometimes the only thing pushing me onwards. I hope this chapter doesn't leave you too tense - and if it does, sorry baby x