Jaune and Courage the Cowardly Dog
Chap 20: Son of the Chicken from Outer Space
It was few days since Peach came to the farmhouse and left with new plant experiments. Nowhere town still had some soldiers there. But it seemed like today they were leaving. Many were packing up and were in a sour mood as they did not find what they wanted. Which honestly, I doubted they even would as Iris usually spends her time in the clouds as opposed to here on the planet. Though that did change when we started dating. Either way, I am just glad they are leaving which meant we can safely go back into town again. But in the back of my mind, I do wonder how the soldiers would react if they saw the chicken from outer space or even the snowman. And whether or not they could deal with all the man-eating plants we just faced. It brought a smile to my face when I imagined how demoralized they would be after getting defeated by the plants.
Shaking my head, I returned my attention to the matter at hand. And that was dealing with Winter's million questions. We were currently outside next to the chicken coup with Muriel, Eustace and Courage on the inside painting it. Winter had arrived at the farmhouse earlier to question us on whether or not we have seen any strange activities. Luckily, Muriel completely missed what Winter was getting at and said she hasn't. And Eustace, just said no and who cares. She seemed close to a breakdown but went eerily calm when she spotted me. She then pulled me aside began to question me on everything. I at first tried to deny everything, but she then told me that Weiss informed her of New York and the quest we did together to get an evil package. Sighing, I decided to tell her most of the things I have seen. But still did not tell her about Iris. In the end, she seemed close to popping a vein as it was clear as day that she did not believe me.
"I am going to tell you one last time. Tell me the truth of everything that you have seen. I do not have time for games and jokes such as a chicken from Outer Space." Winter warned. At that moment, we heard the tea kettle go off. A moment later, both Eustace and Muriel come out of the chicken coup and head inside the house.
"Take it as you may, but it really did happen. And Weiss is in fact telling the truth that she was lost in a place in New York and that we deliver an evil package." I told her getting irritated. But I tried to remain calm as I knew she would not believe anything I say so easily unless I had solid concrete proof. And while I did have some pictures, she could just as easily say they were fake.
"Mr. Arc I-" Winter began but I cut her off.
"Jaune. Call me Jaune as I am no longer an Arc and do not want to be remined of them." I told her seriously.
"We are not on a first name basis so I will call you by your last- Do you hear something?" She began but stopped and asked when a whistling sound began even though there was no one here aside from us and Courage.
"You mean a whistling SOUND!" I began only to shout when the ground started shaking. At first, I thought it was an earthquake, but a giant shadow appearing over us changed that.
'What's happening?' Courage shouted coming out of the chicken coup covered in blue paint.
"I don't know Courage." I answered.
"WATCH OUT!" Winter shouted and quickly grabbed me and Courage and tossed us to the side to avoid being squashed by the spaceship that just landed on top of the chicken coup.
"Thanks Winter." I said getting up. Only to receive a cold glare from her.
'That ship looks familiar.' Courage said as removed the wooden boards that was on top of him. I helped him up, pulled out a rag and began to wipe away the paint on him. 'Thanks.'
"No problem. And yeah, that ship does-" I began but Winter interrupted me.
"Mr. Arc-" Winter began but I cut her off.
"Jaune. I don't care if we are not on a first name basis, I am not an Arc so don't call me that." I told her through gritted teeth. Winter's eye seemed to twitch at this.
"Please stop talking to your dog as if he can understand you or I will be forced to sedate you. I must tell Ironwoods of this." Winter threatened before pulling out her scroll. But just as she did so, it got destroyed by a laser. "What the?"
'AAAHHHH!' Courage shouted getting my attention. Looking towards him, I saw him look back to the ship. Turning to it, I saw that the laser came from the opened door on the ship.
"On behalf of the Atlas Kingdom, I order whoever is in this ship to... step... out..." Winter began to demand but trailed off at the end as the owner showed its head. Then another. And another. Each head apparently resembling a chicken's head. The first head seem serious while the second head seemed crazy and third seemed to be the smart one of the three.
'EEK!' Courage exclaimed when he saw the heads.
"So... you were... telling the truth about a chicken from outer space." Winter said trying her hardest not to faint and/or comprehend what she is seeing.
"Yeah. I was not lying. Everything I told you really happened." I told her. Unsure whether to feel relieved that she now believes me because of three alien chickens appeared or feel annoyed that we have to deal with three space chickens.
"I..." Winter began but stopped when the chickens stepped forward to reveal that instead of three separate chickens it was just one chicken with three heads. And each head seemed to have a mind and personality of its own. Seeing as one took a picture with the flash nearly blinding the other heads. "Night-night."
"Great." I sighed as I saw Winter faint from what she saw.
'AAAHHHH!' Courage screamed and was about to run back to the house in red heels for some reason but I stopped him before he could.
"Courage, help me carry her back to the house." I told him.
He nodded and with his help, we quickly made our way back to the house. Getting there, we barged into the kitchen before slamming the door shut. We placed Winter on the floor carefully, I then ran to the sink and began to fill a bucket with water. Meanwhile, Courage was trying to tell Muriel and Eustace of what we saw. They were currently eating some cake and drinking some tea. Courage even transformed into a spaceship and three headed chicken and destroyed a cake to try and get the message across. Unfortunately, it failed as usual.
"Hey, what you do that for?" Eustace demanded when he saw Courage smash a slice of cake.
"All right Courage. We'll help you finish painting. Jaune, when your done helping your friend, come and help us as well." Muriel asked as they got up from their chairs.
"All right Muriel." I said as I went back to Winter's side as they left the house. Raising the bucket, I braced myself for the cold hell storm that would come doing this. Taking a breath, I splashed all the water onto Winter.
"GAH!" Winter exclaimed waking up. She coughed a bit before turning to glare at me and Courage. "What did you do that for?"
"You fainted back there." I answered. "Do you remember what caused you to faint?"
"Of course, I remember. But I do believe it was either something I ate or some form of dust that caused me to hallucinate." Winter answered as she got up and dusted herself off. "Now, let us go outside and continue our discussion."
"Alright," I said annoyed as she exited the house. Courage and I followed her but grew confused and concerned when we were outside and saw that the spaceship had disappeared.
'Where did it go?' Courage asked as we began to look around.
"I don't know." I answered as all I saw was a destroyed chicken coup and an angry Eustace muttering about getting his tools.
"As I stated before, please stop talking to your dog an let us continue to discuss what we started earlier." Winter called out glaring at me. I walked over to her while Courage walked over to help Muriel collect all the chickens that were scattered about.
"Okay, so where should we begin?" I asked walking up to her.
"First of all. Mind your tongue. Second, we were discussing on how the activities that you and Weiss claim to have done in a fictional place called New York." She answered with a stern glare.
Sighing in aggravation, I was about to speak but stopped when I heard Courage scream nearby. Turning around and ignoring Winter's demand to face her, I saw Courage dive into a bucket just in time to avoid being turned into much from the laser gun the three headed chicken shot at him. He saw this and ran out of the bucket to take cover somewhere else. But as he ran, I saw the chickens take aim and were about to fire again.
"COURAGE!" I shouted as I ran dove towards him just in time to push him to the ground to avoid the laser. Though, judging from the sound of the flash I heard followed by the growling, I assumed the middle head of the chicken took a picture which blinded the other two heads which threw the aim off. Fortunately for us as this helped us avoid the laser. But unfortunately for Eustace as the laser hit him and melted only his legs for some weird reason.
"Stupid dog.' Eustace shouted as he began to strangle Courage believing that he caused his legs to melt.
"Eustace!" Muriel shouted out suddenly. Turning to her, we saw her walking towards us while carrying a lot of chickens. "Would you leave poor Courage alone and help me with this hen house?"
"What am I?" Eustace began before mumbling as he 'crawled' his way over to the hen house to begin collecting the still good wood.
"You okay Courage?" I asked once Eustace was away.
'Yeah, I'm fine.' He answered as he took a few deep breathes.
"Um, did you see a three headed chicken shoot a laser at your dog Jaune?" Winter asked hesitantly and with uncertainty as well. Not sure of what she just saw was real or not.
"Yeah. And that is the same chicken that you saw earlier that destroyed your scroll and made you faint." I answered before adding. Her eyes widened at this and she immediately reached for her scroll to see if what I said was true. Only to not be able to feel her scroll. She then looked around to see of the she merely dropped but her face paled when she saw the destroyed remains from earlier.
"Okay, so we are dealing with a three headed chicken from outer space. How shall we deal with?" Winter asked trying her hardest not to lose it or faint again.
"Why are you asking me? Aren't you supposed to be trained to come up with plans no matter what?" I asked back.
"We were not trained to deal with chickens from outer space. Not to mention, you have at least some experience dealing with these things." She answered with a glare.
"I don't have time for this. I'm just going to help my family rebuilding the chicken coup. If I come up with something, I will tell you.' I told her and before she could say anything, I walked over towards Muriel and began picking up the wooden boards as well.
"Now, we can rebuild it anyway we want. It will be the chicken coup of our dreams." Muriel said before walking away to pick up more wooden boards.
"Where do you think they will strike next Courage?" I asked him as I put down wooden boards next to me in a neat pile.
'I don't know and that's what worries me. They seem to be a lot more aggressive than the other chicken we faced.' He answered shivering.
"Yeah, as evidence by their laser that melted Eustace's legs." I agreed while holding in a chuckle.
'Do you think they could be related?' Courage asked.
"Doubt it. But then again, anything's possible." I answered.
"JAUNE!" Winte yelled storming over to us angrily. "IF YOU EVER WALK AWAY LIKE THAT AG-Huh?"
I was confused for a slight moment when she suddenly stopped shouted and became confused. But got my answer when a shadow suddenly loomed over us. Looking up, I saw the three headed chicken glaring down from us. Looking back down, I saw that they somehow build and placed an elaborate contraption right behind us without us hearing anything.
"What the?" I asked confused.
"What is this supposed to do?" Winter asked stepping up next to me.
'Whatever it is, it can't be good.' Courage said trembling.
At the moment, the chickens laughed before pulling out a polka dotted egg and dropping it down a funnel where it then went through a tube. Foe a few seconds, it just went through this tube before coming out the end that had a plunger on it for some weird reason. The egg then dropped a few feet where it was caught by a net. However, the impact still cracked the egg shell but because of the holes in the net, the egg yolk slipped through and continued to fall a few more feet where it landed in a frying pan that was above an open flame. The egg quickly cooked and when it was a done, a bell rang which follow the pan flinging the egg over to a row of dominoes that proceeded to fall down from the impact. The dominoes continued to fall down a few levels with our eyes continuously following each domino.
"Whatever their goal is, must they build something that is this complicated?" Winter asked as we continued to watch the dominoes fall over.
I merely shrugged as I did not what was the point of this contraption. Turning my attention back to it, I saw the dominoes finally reached the end where the last domino topples over a plastic thumb that causes it to hit the switch on a light which lit the fuse right over it. Following the fuse, we saw that it led to the rocket that was right in front of us that we somehow missed. Winter tried to stop but it lifted off before she could. We were afraid that it might explode, but to our surprise, it merely hovered in the air after it was a few feet above our heads. The top then opened and a robotic hand came out and tapped something. Squinting our eyes, we saw that it was waking up some strange sleeping spider. Once the spider woke up, the hand got its attention before pointing down to us. The spider then rubbed its hands together as if plotting something.
"What on Remnant is that spider planning and what is the point of all this?" Winter asked wondering what the point of this entire thing was if its purpose was just to wake up a spider. But we got our answer when the spider suddenly threw and extremely large web at us that easily trapped us. It then picked us up before throwing us a good twenty feet away easily.
"Well, that was unexpected." I said as I struggled to break free.
"This is no laughing matter." Winter angrily told me. She then started moving as if trying to reach for something. "If I can just get my sword loose, I can cut us free."
'WAAAHH!' Courage suddenly yelled.
"What is it Courage?" I asked.
'LOOK!' He answered. Turning back around, I saw rolled up train tacks heading towards us. It quickly reached us yet instead of going over us, we somehow went through the spaces unharmed and now laid on top of the tracks. But right after that, I heard something that sent shivers down my spine. A train whistle that seemed to be gaining speed as it came closer to us.
"Um, Winter. You may want to hurry." I told her as she apparently did not notice the train tracks.
"Quiet. I almost got it." She yelled.
"WINTER!" I Shouted getting her full attention.
"WHAT?!" She asked angrily but then heard the train whistle. She quickly turned around and I could tell her eye widened when she saw the train.
"TRAIN! HURRY!" I told her. She immediately tried to get her sword as quickly as she can to cut us free. But with how fast the train was coming, I feared it might be too late. I quickly began to look around for an alternative that could save us. Though from the corner of my eye, I saw Muriel entering the house. Probably mistaking the train whistle for the kettle whistle. A second later though, I spotted something that could potentially save us. A railroad switch.
"Courage!" I shouted getting his attention. He was currently trying to bite through the spider web but stopped when I called him. "See if you can move the switch over there with your tongue."
'Okay. Okay.' He quickly said before extending his tongue out and managing to reach the red lever and use it to change the train's course. And just in time to for as soon as the lever was pulled, the train was less than a split second away from crushing us but changed at the last possible moment. The wind pull from the sudden change caused us to go up into the air and spin us free from the web.
"That was... unexpected." Winter said as I helped her and Courage up. Though also helping each other remain up right as we were a bit dizzy from the sudden spin.
"AAAHHHHH!" Eustace's scream caught our attention. Quickly turning to where it came from, we saw that Eustace was on the roof top of the chicken coup but unfortunately, it got destroyed when the train went through it. Seeing as the coup was destroyed again, the chickens seemed to have had enough and were now leaving. Some with suitcases they got from somewhere.
"Uh, he does have aura, doesn't he?" Winter asked nervously.
"Nope. But he has survived worse than that." I answered before adding. "We should still help him though."
"Right." Winter said as we rushed over to the chicken coup and removed all the debris covering Eustace. Once that was clear, we saw that he had suffered a lot of injuries and broken bones.
"Let's get him inside so we can patch him up." I said as I moved around so I can lift him from the front.
"Then we can discuss on how to deal with these 'chickens from outer space.'" Winter said as she picked up Eustace's legs. Still having trouble believing that she was tied up by a spider and nearly crushed under a train because of a three headed chicken.
Sighing, I nodded aa we made our way to the house. Getting there, Courage opened up the door allowing us to enter. Inside, we saw Muriel in her chair sipping tea. She gasped when she saw Us carrying Eustace and how injured she was. She told us to place him in his chair while she went off to get the first aid kit while Courage went to the kitchen and grabbed an ice pack. Placing him on the chair, we waited for a moment for Muriel to come back which she did a moment later. When Muriel asked what happened, Eustace answered saying that a train came out of nowhere and hit him along with destroying the chicken coup.
"Eustace, I wish you would control your temper." Muriel scolded as we finished putting the bandages on him. "A train in the middle of Nowhere. Really?!"
'Heh, Heh, Heh.' Courage laughed nervously when Muriel tuned to him. Still upset and annoyed, Muriel got up and went into the kitchen to get some more tea. Once she was gone, Winter turned to me with a frosty cold glare.
"Now that we have some time and are safe for the moment, let us discuss how to deal with these 'chickens' before someone seriously gets hurt." Winter said before quickly adding. "Besides him."
"Alright, but where do we-" I started but stopped when knocking was heard on the front door.
'Who could that be?' Courage asked as he walked to the door. But Winter picked him up and handed him to me.
"Let me answer. It could be either the chickens or a trap set by them," Winte explained. Though, I could easily tell she struggled not to stutter as she said that as she did not think she would ever say that in her life.
'Who do you think it is?' Courage asked as I set him down.
"I don't know Courage. Could be either or both." I answered as we looked over to Winter who opened the door. Only to grow worried when she suddenly slammed the door shut and had a panicked look on her face. "I'm guessing the trap."
And I was right for as soon as Winter stepped away from the door, it flung open to reveal a giant floating egg with a fuse on top of it that was lit that told us it was actually a remote control bomb.
"RUN!" Winter ordered. We did not need to be told twice and began to run as fast as we could away from the bomb. However, it continued to chase us where ever we went. Even when we attempted to hide somewhere like in the grandfather clock, it would somehow appear there as well from thin air. But what I noticed while it chased us was that it would go to exactly where we just were. Even if it meant going under a chair to catch us.
"I have an idea. Follow me." I quickly told them. They nodded and followed me up the stairs to the bathroom.
"Great! We're trapped. Nice going Jaune." Winter scolded as she headed over to the window.
"Wait. This is part of the plan. Now hide in the closed. Courage, hide behind the tub." I told him.
'Why? It'll spot me.' He asked nervously and confused.
"Exactly. And when it does, go into the toilet and it follow you and get stuck as a result." I explained.
"How do you expect your dog to escape?" Winter asked.
"By using the pathway that will lead him to the tank in the back." I answered. She still seemed unsure but did not have the chance to say anything as we heard the egg close in on us.
Getting into our hiding spots, we waited for the egg to enter the bathroom. However, it did somehow but did use the door. Courage, who was next to the tub, nervously moved the curtain to see the egg there taking a bath. He screamed in terror before diving into the toilet with the egg following him without hesitation. And because of that it got stuck in the toilet. Courage came out a moment later from the tank behind it. He then started to stomp on it to try and make it go down but it didn't. He was about to try and flush it but Winter stopped him before he could do so.
"Let's not flood the bathroom." She suggested which caused Courage to laugh nervously. She then licked her thumb before using her thumb and index finger to put out the fuse. But as soon as she did that, the egg began to move again and as it did so, we heard ticking coming from it.
"Seems like they expected us to do that." I said as the ticking started to get faster.
"OUT! I'M GOING TO USE A GLYPH MINIMIZE THE EXPLOSION!" Winter quickly shouted before doing so. We nodded and left the bathroom with a moment later Winter doing the same and closing the door.
"Hopefully it doesn't get fully destroyed." I hoped. At that moment though, Eustace came up and heaeded to the bathroom.
"Sir, it is not safe to enter the bathroom." Winter warned with Courage trying to do the same.
"My turn, stupid dog." Eustace said irritably as he ignored us and entered the bathroom. Only to get exploded as the bomb went off with a larger than expected explosion that could have destroyed the entire house had Winter not put a glyph to prevent that,
"Lousy toilet." We heard Eustace complain.
"Does he seriously think it was the toilet?" Winter asked amazed as she waved her hand in front of her face to clear the smoke.
Half an hour later
We were outside the house watching Eustace rebuild the chicken coup. Though because it was destroyed a few times, it looked like a jumbled mess. We could have used wood that wasn't destroyed but because of stinginess and not wanting to spend money, we had to use the wood that got destroyed and glue the pieces together.
"Well, it's not a royal hen house, but it is quite lovely." Muriel said as she sipped on the tea she had.
"It is. And thank you for the tea." Winter agreed before thanking Muriel for the tea.
"No problem love." Muriel said as she took another sip of her tea. "Come Courage and Jaune. Let's go in and have a look-see."
"Jaune." Winter said getting my attention.
"Yes?" I asked.
"We should try and keep them inside the house as I believe they are the next targets of the chickens." Winter warned.
"Your right. I'll think of a way to get them inside." I told her. She nodded and we walked up to the hen house just as Muriel and Courage entered it. Walking up the ramp, we looked around and saw that despite it being a wreck, it did look similar to how it was before.
"Eustace, you did a fine job." Muriel said congratulating him. But as soon as she said that, the opening was suddenly barricaded. Turning around, we saw that the chickens trapped us in here.
'AAAHHHHH!' Courage screamed before jumping in terror. Only to make a hole in the ceiling allowing him to escape.
"Everyone stand back." Winter advised. We did so as she took out some dust. She then made a glyph and combined it with the dust to blow off the barricade on the hen house allowing us to exit.
"Thank you, dearie." Muriel said as we exited the hen house.
"No problem Muriel. Jaune let us deal with these chickens.' She said turned to me.
"Alright" I said as we made our way over to discover they had not notice yet that we were free.
But before we could reach them, the chicken head in the middle took a picture which blinded the other two heads. Once they recovered from the flash, they began to fight with each other. But right before the first blow landed, Courage landed on top of them. This caused them to get even more angry and escalate it even more. At first, their fighting merely consisted of just fists. Then it persisted of anything they could find laying around. Next was things that they started to pull from thin air. Such as a water spray, a pie, watermelon and fish. Courage even began to help by placing things closer to them. Such as a rock, an anchor and a banana peel.
"Here, try this." Winter suddenly said as she handed them a mace, followed by pepper spray and a... pepper grounder and salt shaker. She then gave them some other seasonings as well to use.
'Guess she must be hungry.' I thought as she handed them a blow torch and it instantly started ton smell like roasted seasoned chicken on thanks giving. But my thoughts were interrupted when the fight stopped and the crying began. The chicken had dropped to the ground and were crying heavily now.
"Um, is everything all right?" I asked them. Instead of answering, they handed me a device with a button on it.
"What is it?" Winter asked. I shrugged and pressed the button on it. As soon as I pressed it, the screen above it and what I can only presume is the mother chicken of them. And she seemed angry.
'Now go to earth and destroy dog Courage and human Jaune. Or don't come home.' She threatened before the screen turned off. I gelt bad when I heard that and I could tell Courage did so as well as he was nearly crying. I began to wonder on what we could do when Winter suddenly spoke up.
"I have a proposition." She said with a smirk while looking towards me.
'Oh no.' I thought as I felt a cold shiver trail down my spine.
Ten minutes later
I did not know how I felt Winter now. What she proposed to help was to take pictures of us defeated and humiliated. And while I was more than willing to help the chickens so they could go home, I dreaded what she had in mind as she wanted to get revenge on me for some reason. And she did. First, she made the chickens use their camera to have evidence. The first thing she made them do was strangle both me and Courage. Next was them poking all our eyes as hard as they can. Then was them squeezing the life out of us with their legs. Then having them drop a piano on us. And finally, having us humiliated by essentially turning us into a thanksgiving dinner with sauce poured over us and an apple in our mouths. Once that was done, we shook hands and the chickens went back to their ship. But as soon as they reached the door, they took one last picture but this time it included all of us. With that done, the entered their ship and left.
"Gorgeous. You see what glorious work we can do when we work together?" Muriel asked happily.
"Indeed." Winter said agreeing.
"After all, three heads are better than one." Muriel added with a smile.
'AAAHHHH!' Courage suddenly screamed. Turning to him, we saw him screaming for some reason. But we got our answer when we looked down and saw that we were now all sharing one chicken body. Looking to my left, I saw that Winter had fainted when she saw this as well.
'Great. Now how we get out of this.' I mentally thought as I tried to come up with a way to separate ourselves.
Note:
(1) The House of Discontent with Oobleck. (2) Human Habitrail with Coco. (3) The Quilt Club with Coco.
I should have asked this before, but when Nora appears in a chapter, should I automatically include Ren in it or keep him separate? As in having only Nora appear in the chapter.