Hey there! Long time no see! Well I've been busy with... let's see... two moves, getting a new job, adjusting to a new state, and fanfics in other areas. really, I've been having a lot of fun in Skip Beat, and if you want some father/son fun, Tales of Symphonia got quite a bit from me. And now I'm working on one for Sailor Moon... *sigh* That one has OCs. Anywho, you should know I haven't forgotten DNB here, I've just been working on other things. Wouldn't say I'm completely back, but I am working on a lot of projects, plus retaking a class to finish school. XP I have some DNB Stories written I haven't put out yet too, but it's too soon to publish yet. Set up is a pain in the rear... And my compy's being a bit wonky...
Without further adeu, the next chapter of Daddy, Not Bats!
Dick – 17 Jason – 13 Cass – 12
Summer Showers Therapy
Dr. Pendergast was leaving Wayne Manor after her most recent session with Dick and a quick chat with Alfred. Jason watched her leave from the front window, frowning to himself. He still didn't see the need for a therapist. They were doing fine without one with everyone else. Hey, he was pretty screwed up himself. Why wasn't he going to therapy?
Trick question. Dad didn't force anyone into therapy. He suggested it once but nothing more. It was all the courts fault the shrink came around.
Rolling his eyes, the teen watched the lady drive off before going back to the heart of the house. Near the sitting room he heard Alfred talking to Dick, and Dad over the phone. He was at work, even in the summer. "Dr. Pendergast's suggestion to include water activities into Master Richard's daily life is, I believe, quite wise."
"I'm not sure about this Alfred." The note of fear in his older brother's voice was very unnerving. Dick was always fearless, even when he thought they shouldn't do something because it was dangerous. Hearing him scared… it was just wrong. Where was the guy he looked up to? Jason frowned uneasily at how wrong all of this was. "I mean, using water like that right now… I think I'll just-"
"A bath now and again is all find and good," the butler stated firmly, "but you are taking another semester of physical education come September. You will be in a public place, and you will take showers."
"Don't forget the storm front coming our way." Dad's voice always brought reason, even if the reason was stupid in other's eyes. "What are you going to do if you're caught outside when it's raining?"
"Curl up and die?"
Jason couldn't help but to laugh at the very Dick-like answer, but that gave away his position. The second he heard Alfred's footfall, he ran as fast as he could to the stairs to 'occupy' himself with something else. Breathing hard, he pulled into his room and found a book from his reading list hanging around. He grabbed it, opened it up to a random page, and flopped onto his bed. Alibi secured. All he had to do now was calm his breathing.
One minute: he had himself on a rhythm.
Two minutes: his heart was slowing.
Three minutes: everything was in sync again.
Four minutes: he was almost normal.
Five minutes: normal. Definitely normal.
Six minutes… wasn't Alfred supposed to check on him by now?
Ten minutes… did he really get away scot free?
Fifteen… or was Alfred ticking him into doing his summer reading?
Glaring to himself, Jason closed the book, got off his bed, and made his way back to his door. He paused for a moment before opening it, listening intently to see if someone was waiting for him to appear. He couldn't hear anything beyond that door. Really worried now that something was up, the teen carefully opened his door and peeked outside.
No one was there. "What the…"
Confused, and if he was honest a little disappointed, he opened it wide open and looked around the hallway. Empty. No one was around. Not a sound. Spooky and boring. Not a good combo.
"I'm outta here." Done with the silence, Jason bolted towards where someone was bound to be; the kitchen. It didn't take long to find it, and inside was exactly what he was looking for: people. He heard voices, particularly of little kids laughing.
Curious, he peeked inside and found quite the sight. Dick was surrounded by their younger siblings at the table, blank pages and crayons rolling all over it. Damian sat on his lap while Tim hung over his arm, adding to the drawing they were working on. Cass sat nearby, pointing out things and making suggestions. All of them were smiling. And not just any smile. It was the perfectly happy, perfect picture smile.
Most people would watch and smile seeing that. Jason didn't. Instead he stepped back and walked back to his room, his heart twisting into a knot.
It was too perfect. No room for him.
Was there ever room for him?
"Hey Dick!" Tim's voice carried across the gym, catching Jason's attention. He looked over his shoulder to the kid and how excitedly he bounded over to the acrobat working into a position that shouldn't be possible. It really wasn't that unusual for Tim to run to this guy like that. Really.
Still…
Dick looked up and moved so perfectly and quickly, it would make the Flash jealous. And he was upright catching Tim before he made it to him. "Easy there. What's up Timmy?"
"Can you show me how you-"
Jason punched the bag in front of him hard, forcing himself to not listen. Yeah, Dick's been back for over a month. Two actually. There were a lot of things Tim wanted to show him, to be shown by him. Nothing to over think. Just… ignore it. Ignore it.
Ignore how Tim used to show him what Cass taught him while Dick was gone, and ask him for help. Just… ignore it.
"Dick, mind taking Damian to bed?"
"Hey Dick! Check this out!"
"What would you like for dinner Master Richard?"
"Hey Dicky! What's kickin'? Wanna play Star Wars? I got pizza!"
"Here. Tell me what you think of this case Dick."
"Dick! Sit wif me!"
"Help me with this will you Dick?"
Voices and images kept flashing through Jason's mind, each one really shouldn't make him feel so horrible, but it did. Every time in the past week or so he found Dick, he was interacting with someone else in the family. And each time he just…
The dark feeling inside him was why he packed a backpack that night. He waited until Bruce Wayne was busy down below, Alfred finished up his rounds, and everyone was asleep. The rain was roaring down, but that was good. It was a warm rain and it would cover his tracks. He'd make it out before anyone was the wiser.
Once he was sure he wouldn't be discovered, Jason silently walked through the halls all the way down to the main back door. In the morning Alfred would find a letter, and by then he'd be untraceable. His watch sat on top of it.
He wasn't coming back.
The teen looked back to the picture of him with the rest of the Wayne kids, his heart twisting a little with every thought an memory. They'd be fine without him. They always were. Maybe they'd be better. He was the one who kept getting in fights and arguments with teachers. Mr. Wayne got more headaches from him than anyone else.
They were all better without him.
"Well… see ya." With that, he slipped out the door and into the wet night.
Or tried to.
"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!"
Jason whipped his head around about ten feet away from the door, his eyes wide in surprise. Wasn't everyone asleep? In the dry doorway stood the source of his inner turmoil, one Dick Grayson. He hung onto the doorframe, panting as if he ran for his life. And he was looking right at him. His twisted heart leapt to his throat. What was he… "JASON!"
Coming back to himself, the younger teen shrugged, grinning for a moment. Then he bolted across the lawn with all the strength he could muster. Wasn't enough. Within a minute Dick tackled him into the muddy ground. "Get off! Let me go!"
"NO!" The strained shout in his ear did not stop Jason from struggling with all his might. He managed to turn around and start jabbing at the guy, but he would not let go. It was too dark to see his face, but he knew Dick was mad. "Jason! What are you doing?!"
"Get off Goldie!" Quickly he thrust a knee into the guy's side, hoping to throw him off. They teetered apart for a second, then both started rolling in the mud. "Get lost!"
"No! I'm not letting you go!" Dick rolled to his feet, his body tense and ready to take him back on in a second. "I spent four months-"
"Yeah! You spent four months away! And suddenly you're back and everything's perfect!" He shoved himself into a crouch, snarling his frustrations at the guy in front of him as his chest constricted painfully. He'd never understand! Couldn't understand! "So perfect, I don't belong! I don't belong here!"
"What are you talking about?! Of course you belong-"
"No I don't!" Screaming over the rain, Jason balled his fists, glaring at the one in front of him. "I never belonged! People only want me around when you're not! I'm nothing but your replacement!"
"Since when?!" The accusing note in his voice could not be missed.
"Since the beginning!" Shaking in rage, the teen shouted over the roaring water around them. Somehow it made the tension inside him boil over, tension that started so very long ago. "I had nearly every single teacher you did! Each one of them compared me to you!"
"But that-"
"Even DAD compares me to you!" Tears welled in his eyes as he recalled times Dick's name came up during their discussions and training. "And you're always better!"
"I'm older!"
"That doesn't matter!" Why couldn't he get it?! Jason's eyes burned with the agony he suffered all this time. "You're mister perfect! The one everyone wants! They only wanted me when you were GONE! I'm-"
Dick cut him off with a good fist to the jaw, throwing him to the ground. Reflexively Jason broke his fall and rolled straight to his feet, glaring at the guy. He hit him! Dick hit him! He could see the guy's glare now, and it was very similar to Batman's. "What was that for?!"
"You're an idiot." The cold glare on the older teen's face only edged him on.
"Well you're a DICK!" Not even thinking about it, he kicked the guy's nuts. His reflexes saved him from real damage, but the low blow started the free for all. "A perfect little-"
"MORON!" Dick threw himself at the teen, tackling him to the ground yet again. Both of them bunched and kicked wildly, wrestling in the rain, mud, and grass with everything they had, verbally and physically.
"ASS!"
"STUPID!"
"CLOWN!"
"IDIOT!"
"Said that already!"
"Because you are!" Dick pinned him to the earth best he could, glaring vehemently into his eyes. "Of course everyone relied on you when I was gone! You were big brother then! Everyone relies on the oldest when they're around! That's what it means to be the big brother!"
"I don't wanna be big brother!" The verbal barb was enough of a shock to throw the older boy off and allow Jason to give him another solid punch. "I wanna be seen as me! Not you! I'm not you!"
"Stop being stupid and listen you idiot!" And back to wrestling they went, neither of them really holding back. With the rain pouring down, it was hard to believe they were making any contact on each other. "They know you're not-"
"As soon as you're back I'm-"
A sharp yank from their collars pulled them off of each other in a second, bringing their full attention to a steaming mad and wet Bruce Wayne. "That's enough!" Anger and rage drained from both boys as their father's temper brought them out of their private fight. Their stomachs suddenly had holes in the bottom, their hearts slipping through easily. This was not good. "Both of you! Inside! NOW!"
He all but threw them to the open doors where Alfred was waiting, towels in hand. Both teen stumbled forward, not sure what to do, but the imposing drenched man behind them, and the properly imposing man before them, clearly decide everything long before grabbing them. The butler handed them a towel each, then threw one over each of their heads before coolly giving them orders. "Sitting room. Do not get the couch wet."
"But-" A scowl from the man ended Dick's objection, getting a sigh instead. Nodding, the boys carefully started removing their shoes and socks in the room they were in, dreading the talk they were going to have soon. Pants were rolled up and they toweled down as best they could before wrapping a towel over each of their waists so when they sat down the couch wouldn't be an issue. Casting each other glares from the corner of their eyes, they trudged over to the sitting room to await their punishment. Though they technically didn't break any rules, Dad and Alfred were angry. Punishment would come.
"You shoulda just let me go."
"Not in your life."
"Quiet." The one word from the butler following after them now, was all it took to stop all chatter.
Soon enough they were in the sitting room, where so much happened in their lives. The last vivid memory Jason had in there was being told by Alfred that Dick was missing. It felt like a punch in the gut. Now he just wanted to punch the guy in the gut. Frustrated, the teen flopped on the couch and folded his arms, glaring away from everyone. Dick planted himself one cushion away from him, leaning over his knees and looking at the ground, a similar expression on his face. Feeling they were still too close to each other, Jason tried to get up and take a chair instead. Alfred's vice like grip on his shoulder kept him there.
This just sucked.
Nothing was said between any of them as they waited for Bruce to get in there. It felt like forever and the silence was suffocating. In truth it was only five minutes and it wasn't all that quiet. Bruce was talking to someone on the phone but they couldn't make out any of the details. As soon as his call was done, he swept into the room. "Marshal Miller will be here in half an hour with a new anklet."
"What?" In an instant Dick jerked upright, looking straight to the man for answers. Despite himself, Jason also looked over to him with interest. What was going on?
Bruce glared at both of them reprovingly. "Your fight outside damaged your tracking anklet. He called me immediately and traced your watch outside. You're lucky he called me first instead of the police department. What were you two doing? Fighting out there? At this time of night?"
The questions demanded an answer, and there was only a moment of hesitation before one was given. "Jason was running away."
The temperature dropped the second Dick's lips stopped moving. Once more Jason wouldn't look at anyone, closing himself off from everyone. He was still going to leave if he had anything to say about it. He could feel all the eyes falling on him and knew what was coming before it even started.
"Jason,' Bruce started in a low voice, "is this true?"
He didn't say anything for a moment before muttering, "It's not like ya need me here anyway. Ya got Dick back and he's perfect. I was just his repla-"
"Dammit Jay! It's nothing like that!" Dick leapt to his feet, ready to scream at him all over again. The younger boy still didn't look at him, or the man whose grip was weakening on his shoulder, or the giant who somehow became silent again. They kept their peace while Dick ranted on. "You're not a replacement! This has nothing to do with me! You're just not listen-"
"I have eyes!" With a snap he glared at the guy, ready for another fight. "The second you're back, everyone's concerned about you! EVERYONE! You're the one they talk about! You're the one they run to! They rely on! You're the big guy on campus!"
"Stop being a jealous ass for five minutes and listen for a change!"
"Language," Alfred murmured nearby, but few listened.
"Who are ya calling a jealous-"
"You! You idiot!" Taking a step to him, Dick went on. "Since the first day we met, we've been jealous of each other for stupid reasons!"
"What are you-"
"I was jealous you were adopted first! You were jealous of me being older and better respected! I was jealous of your natural talents, you were jealous of my skills! I was jealous you didn't have any responsibilities and now you're jealous because I've got them again!"
Leaping to his feet, "I am not-"
"You are! And it's ridiculous!" Dick shoved Jason back onto the couch, getting both men to jerk forward in alarm. Looming over him, the young man bore into his brother's eyes. "The minute I'm gone, you get all the responsibilities of being 'big brother'! You're the first one Bruce looks to when getting everyone to do something! You're the one they all confide in! The one they go to for protection at school! For advice with friends or class or training or whenever they're fighting each other! You're the leader! The big example! You get to see the real impact everything has on adults! That is what it means to be the oldest!
"You finally got to see what I deal with all the time, and you felt needed! More then than any time before! And then POOF!" He threw his arms out, taking a step back dramatically. "Lo and behold! The prodigal son returns! And everybody loves him! Even though his disappearance caused everyone grief and he went through Hell on the journey and dumped everything on to your young shoulders! Suddenly the weight is gone! And you miss it! And it's not coming back because 'big brother' is going to be sticking around a little longer. Jealous much?"
"You little-" Jason scrambled to get back to his feet, snarling at the guy.
"WAKE UP! It was going to happen eventually!" Dick's glare and voice stopped him for a moment. Huh? "In fact, it should have been happening now if that monster hadn't taken me!
"Jason, I was supposed to be packing up for college now. I was going to live in the dorms, live life on my terms. I was going to not be big brother except for holidays and phone calls!" He put up a hand momentarily, looking at the two men in the room as he backpedaled. "Don't get me wrong; I love everyone here and I don't hate being the oldest, but six months ago, I was seriously starving for independence. I was looking forward to the dorms just for a change of pace.
"But the point of the matter is," he looked directly back to Jason's eyes, "when I was gone, you would naturally be the one everyone looked up to Jason. That's how it is. And I knew you could do it. It was one fact that helped me get through that whole ordeal."
"What?" Shock found quite a happy home on the lad's face.
"Knowing you were there to help out calmed me down whenever Slade taunted me. I thought…" Looking away, Dick admitted something he hadn't before. "I didn't think I'd ever come back. But knowing you'd stick together, and that you'd never let anyone hurt them… that you could take up my job and make it your own… It let me know everything would be alright without me.
"Even if you think no one here needs you, I need you to be here. To do what I can't and to protect them when I'm gone. To be the mediator for them, to see both sides. To stop Bruce when Alfred can't." Looks were passed around the room but no one dared speak. Dick was too observant sometimes, and acted in ways few realized. "I know you can do it, and you've done it already. I'm counting on you to-"
"I get it! I get it!" Jason held up a hand to stop him from talking anymore, feeling more embarrassed and lightheaded than could possibly be good. Where did he get these lines? A shoujo manga? "Enough with the girly pep-talk already. I won't try to run away anymore. Happy?"
"I don't think you quite get it."
"I get it fine Dick." Standing up, he ran a hand through his hair and tried his hardest not to be anymore embarrassed than he already was. "Just tired of hearing your yapping. Can I just go to bed? I'm wiped out."
Almost ignored the entire time he was in the room, their dad eyed him for a moment before looking over to Dick (who still seemed ready to continue his lecture). "You two were outside fighting in the rain… because you caught him running away?"
"Pretty much…" "Yeah…"
He pinched the bridge of his nose and let out a slow breath in frustration. The man exchanged looks with Alfred, then nodded. "You're both grounded, but yes."
"Aren't I already grounded?" Dick emphasized his joke by jiggling his foot for everyone to see. Jason suppressed a smirk, but was the only one who seemed to want to comment.
"Jason, get yourself cleaned up and go to bed. I'll be checking on you in an hour."
"Got it." He started out the doorway, stopping briefly by Alfred. "I kinda got a soaked bag outside with some things-"
"They will be taken care of Master Jason."
Nodding once, the teen left the room towards his own. He barely heard his dad let out another long breath. "Dick, we really need to talk about how to talk sense to Jason when he's upset."
"You want pointers?"
Jason did his best to not pout when he saw Bat-Bear after his time in the dryer. Alfred was fixing him up while he got to cleaning the kitchen in the man's place. This was his punishment for making a scenario where the Marshal had to come around and interfere with their lives more than usual. Between the rain and their wrestling, the anklet broke and that triggered an alarm on the guy's phone. If he thought Dick had run off or did it on purpose, they could have taken him to a facility for a few weeks. Apparently this was a very bad thing.
'Ah well,' he reminded himself as he finished scraping out the main oven of the kitchen. 'Beats doing all the cars.' That was Dick's job.
"So are you ever going to tell me why you and Dick were fighting outside last night?" Cass' question took him out of his musings for a moment. Not for one second did she believe his story of them deciding to spar in the rain last night. Accidentally breaking the anklet she could believe, but what started the fighting on the other hand…
"Nope." Jason smirked at her knowingly, getting her to roll her eyes in annoyance. "Why are you so interested anyway? Two boys rolling around in the mud outside really that interesting to you?"
"It is when no one else could get him in the rain." That stopped him for a moment, looking at her bewildered. She smirked back at him. "I overheard Alfred and Dr. Pendergast talking about getting him over his water phobia, and one thing she suggested was he played in the rain. I tried to get him outside with me yesterday but he wouldn't budge from the doorway. I even got Damian out there and he wouldn't move.
"And yet first thing I hear about when I get up is how you're grounded because you and Dick fought outside, in the rain, last night." Cass waved a hand at what he was doing, letting him register what she said at last. "I want to know how you did it. What were you two fighting over? What pushed him to go out in the rain? What did you do?"
Jason just stared at her for a moment in silence before coming up with an answer. "Magic."
"Jason!"
Smothering a grin, the teen went back to scrubbing the oven. So… Dick really did need him after all. More than as a replacement or because of his bleeding heart. The guy honestly needed him to push all the right buttons and get him back to 100%. Sweet. If that was what Dickybird needed, who was he to deny him this?
It was really hard not to smile.
A/N: Didn't quite turn out the way I wanted to, but I lost track of what I wanted in the end. I've been working on this one off and on for months! and it started getting too wordy in the end. *sighs* so I cut it short. Roughly, Jason's been a bit of an idiot thinking he has no place in the family now that Dick's back. So he tries to leave. Dick stop him, they fight, and in the end Dick makes him realize that he needs him. Plus, let's face it, soon enough Jay's going to be the eldest in the house. He'd be having all of Dick's responsibilities soon anyway. How he acts as big brother is different, but that's how family is: you look up to the oldest kid who's in the house. I sure did.
Bruce's main role there was to break up the fight. Cass was a last minute slap on that made sense. Dick's hydrophobia is an issue they have to work out, and Jay helps here a little. Will there be more on that, I don't know. I'm kinda tired with doing their summer vacation. I think I'll go on to school starting up again soon. But It'll be a bit. Lots of other projects. Laters!