Chapter 29

Coward

Sirius and James had never been so bored in their life. Remus was making them study, he even went as far as threatening them. He was going to tell them that it was them who dyed the prefects bath purple, and if McGonagall found out she would give them a detention for every prefect that walked out of there with purple skin, and it wouldn't even be counted in the competition because Remus was the one keeping score. Sirius decided to change his nickname to cheater for revenge.

"Do you think the levitating spell will be on it?" Peter asked, he didn't want to miss anything.

"Definitely." James answered and Sirius leaned back in his chair.

"This is dumb, the only subject I need to study for is transfig and I already did that."

"It doesn't hurt to study a little more." Remus said, not looking up from his book.

"It does too. All this information is hurting my brain. It's sensitive, it can only take so much at a time." James laughed.

"Trust me Si, we all know how little and weak..." James couldn't continue do Sirius putting him in a head lock.

"Take it back." Sirius demanded but James just laughed even harder. "Take it back Jamesy-poo."

"Stop calling me that!" James said and began struggling, which was exactly what Sirius was hoping for.

"Take it back and I'll consider it."

"No."

"Then I won't either, Jamesy." Sirius teased when James managed to break free. James tackled him.

Remus sighed and stood to put his book away and get a new one. He shook his head at the two boys wrestling on the floor and just stepped over them. When his got back to the table, he noticed Peter watching them admiringly.

"What's wrong Peter?"

"Nothing." Peter looked back at the notes he was reading. Remus made it pretty obvious that he didn't believe him. "It's nothing really." He tried to pass it off, but realized he did want to talk about it. "I wish I was strong like that."Remus looked at them rolling around on the floor.

"It doesn't look strong to me, just immature."

"I think it looks strong, look at them, I'd be begging to go to the hospital wing by now." Remus chuckled.

"Promise me something Peter." Remus said smiling at him.

"What?"

"Promise me you would try and change just to be like them." Remus gave him a soft look. "Everyone's different Peter, you should be happy with who you are, because it's who you are. Don't try to be like someone else." Peter looked at him in surprise.

"But-But I'm a coward."

"There is a difference between trying to improve yourself and trying to be like someone else Peter. You need to want to be stronger to improve yourself, not because James and Sirius are stronger."

Peter looked at the table, thinking about what Remus said. He looked at James and Sirius who were finally starting to tire of their fight, and probably didn't even remember why they were fighting in the first place.

"What is a good reason to want to be strong then?"

"Well, protecting someone is always a good reason. I think that's why Sirius does it." Remus said watching Sirius get off the floor and help James up.

"Why do you think that?"

"Have you ever noticed that he seems to get kind of protective over us?" Peter shook his head, he actually noticed how harsh Sirius was with them.

"One example is when he got so mad at that last howler. You had to have noticed the difference between that one and the one before it." Remus looked away from Sirius and James who seemed to be thinking up another of their schemes.

"The first time he tried to cheer us up." Peter said glad to actually be able to contribute some information. "And the second time Dumbledore had to knock him out." Remus nodded.

"The first time his mother was insulting him, the second time his mother was insulting us." Peter thought about this for a moment, and realized Remus was right. Sirius hadn't cared in the slightest when his mother had insulted him, but when she started on his friends he became nearly uncontrollable. Peter nodded and opened his mouth to speak, but Sirius unknowingly interrupted him.

"Hey Remus." Sirius said innocently instantly causing Remus to become suspicious.

"What?" He asked eying Sirius warily as he sat in a chair beside him.

"I was wondering..." Sirius paused for a moment. "Since we've been so good.." Remus snorted.

"Good you call wrestling around on the floor as being good?" Sirius thought about this for a moment.

"One second." he said rushing back to James. Remus laughed. Next James came over.

"Remus..." Remus interrupted him before he could get his hopes up.

"I think you two had a big enough break while you were wrestling on the floor."

"That's exactly why we need a break Rem." Sirius joined into the conversation. "I'm.." James glared at him. "I mean we, have been studying so hard that I as starting to worry that our brains have completely snapped." He said overdramaticly.

"Right, I mean why else would I attack my second best friend it the entire world."

"Second." Sirius glared at him.

"Umm..." James face turned red.

"Who's number one then!"

"Umm..."

"It's Peter isn't it, just because you've known him longer."

"Umm..." James began to back away.

"Sirius I think he only said that to get on my good side." Remus defended though he knew Sirius already knew. Sirius looked curiously at Remus for a moment.

"You have a good side?" He teased causing James and Peter to laugh. Remus smirked.

"No, but a guy's allowed to dream." They were all laughing now,

"If you boys don't quiet down I am going to kick you out again." They jumped when they heard the librarian's voice behind them.

"Sorry ma'am, we didn't mean to." James said quieting his giggles. The librarian rolled her eyes, obviously not believing him for a moment, and walked away.

"Seriously though Remus, I think we do need a break." James said, and Sirius nodded after glaring at James for a second because his word choice.

"Fine, go ahead, but don't take too long. Sirius still needs to do a decent transfiguration."

"Yes!" they cheered and gave each other a high five. They walked out of the little circle of bookshelves that hid the table they were sitting at. They walked along the shelves of books not even looking at them.

"Do you think you'll be okay for the transfig exam?" James asked Sirius, it was the first thing that popped into his head to talk about.

"I don't think Remus is going to let me not be okay." He joked. "Calm down, I'll be fine."

"What about History of Magic? You sleep though that whole class." Sirius laughed though a little confused as to why James was so worried about him.

"Trust me James I learn more from copying Cheater's notes then I ever would from Binns. In fact I told Remus he should be a teacher when he grows up because of how much detail he puts in the notes."

"What did he say?"

"He acted kind of weird actually; said he didn't think that was possible and walked off." Sirius paused for a moment considering whether or not to voice his thoughts, he chose to, maybe James would tell him how ridiculous he was being so he could finally believe it. "I think he's hiding something, James." James didn't answer for a while.

"I've been thinking that too." James told him crushing all hope Sirius had that James would calm his fears.

"Should we talk to him about it?" Sirius asked, but James shook his head.

"No, if he wants us to know then he will tell us, otherwise it isn't any of our business."

"But what if it's important?"

"If it was important than he would tell us."

"What if... What if he isn't telling us because he doesn't really want to be around us?" James gave him a confused look. "I mean what if he has ulterior motives to being our friend?"

"Why in the world would he do that?" Sirius looked at the ground and James sighed. "Sirius you can't be suspicious of everyone who won't tell you everything about them."

"I know, but why would he be keeping secrets from us?"

"Maybe he doesn't trust us enough with them, and who can blame him you know we've only known each other for a school year."

"It doesn't feel like it's only been that long, it feels like I've known you guys forever." James smirked glad for the change in subject.

"But if we had known each other forever then you wouldn't be such a bad kid."

"What makes you think that? No I think if we had known each other forever then you would be a bad kid too."

"Would not, I definitely have more influence on you then you do on me."

"I'm the reason you're a bad kid now." James opened his mouth to retaliate but couldn't think of a good response, Sirius just smirked.

"Fine you win." James gave up and began looking though some of the books, Sirius did the same quickly pulling one out.

"Have you ever seen a patronus James?"

"Huh?" James looked at Sirius, noticing he had a book on patronus. "Ya, my dad's is an owl and my mom's is a unicorn."

"Really?" Sirius looked up from the book. "Are they cool looking?"

"Ya, they look awesome, especially when my dad's flies."

"They've always kinda intrigued me. You know their made of nothing but happiness?" James just nodded. "I suppose that's why I've never seen one, there's nothing happy at Grimmauld Place."

"I'm sure you could find something..."

"There are house-elf heads mounted on the walls, James." James stared at him.

"Please tell me you're kidding."

"Nope. When they can't work anymore 'we' cut off their heads and mount them on the walls." Sirius sarcastically over pronounced 'we', he was really wishing he wasn't part of that 'we'.

"That's sick." James said looking completely disgusted "I think now would be a good time to change the subject before I barf."

Sirius chuckled before nodded. "When do we get out of school?"

"Third week of June." Sirius moaned.

"Only a month of freedom left."

"You know, most people look forward to getting out of school." James teased.

"Do you?" Sirius asked and James thought about it.

"Well I'm not sure, I miss my parents, and I miss being able to get out of bed when ever I want. On the other hand though, I know I'm going to miss you guys, and I will be worrying about you all summer."

"Don't worry about me I'll be fine."

"I will anyway." James said in a way that Sirius easily realized that he wouldn't win if they got into a fight over it, so he ignored it. "What do you think your parents are going to do when you get home?"

"Depends on which parent your talking about. My father probably won't even acknowledge I'm home, though he probably wouldn't have if I had been the perfect child either."

"Why?"

"He never leaves his study for anything but food, and sometimes he has Kreacher deliver that to his study too. I don't think I've had more than one full conversation with him my whole life." James was surprised by this, he couldn't even imagine a dad like that. "Though my Mother is a completely different story. She will probably yell a lot then lock me in my room or something."

"Hm." James leaned against a bookshelf. Well we've got that two-way mirror remember. So we can talk when ever we want."

Sirius smiled. "Don't be surprised if I bug you a lot with it, I'll probably need it to stay sane."

"I would if I were you."

"No, if you were me then you would probably die." Sirius teased, trying to lighten up the mood.

"Would not."

"You would too, your parents spoil you too much."

"I'm not spoiled."

"Oh please, your parents would let you get away with murder."

"They would not." James' face was beginning to turn red.

"Yes they would and you know it."

"Shut up." He knew it was true, but he refused to admit it, especially to Sirius. "We should probably get back and study some more. I'm still having problems with all those names in History of Magic." Sirius nodded and they headed back to where Remus and Peter should have been sitting.

They were surprised though as to what they found when they got there. There was only one Marauder there, apparently Peter had booked it when the other guests showed up. There were four Slytherins surrounding Remus.

"Expelliarmus!" Sirius yelled pointing his wand unsurprisingly at the biggest one. James noticed Snape was there, though he didn't know the other three.

The Slytherins turned at Sirius' yell, the one he had aimed for just smirked and easily retrieved his wand.

"You okay, Remus." Sirius asked while James got his wand out as well, though he knew he wouldn't be much help in combat. Unlike Sirius, his parents hadn't illegally taught him underage magic.

"Depends on what you mean by okay." Remus answered his voice shaking ab bit. Sirius got a mean look on his face.

"You're gonna regret ganging up on him like that." Most of the Slytherins just laughed.

"Aww the little first year thinks he's tough." One of them taunted.

"Is it okay if I go get some help, or do you need me to stay?" James whispered in Sirius' ear.

"Please get help" Sirius quietly begged, he wasn't as calm as he let on. James ran off. Sirius didn't respond the the Slytherins taunt, he just stood with his wand ready for an attack. Remus noticed him shaking a little, it wasn't even enough to make the Slytherins notice. He marveled at Sirius' ability to hide his fear, it was nothing short of amazing.

"Stupefy." On of the Slytherins cried, and then it began. Sirius was barely able to dodge the spell he hid under the tables and began flying random spells in every direction. Remus managed to push away from the Slytherins and get under the table as well. He didn't know near as many spell but was still able to think of a few he could use. Sirius was just shooting off random spells that happened to be the first ones that came to his mind.

James was surprised when he came back and found Sirius and Remus hiding under the table. One of the Slytherins was petrified and another one was trying to find his wand. What really surprised James was that none of the Slytherins had their natural hair color.

The librarian's face turned blood red and she easily petrified the Slytherins. As soon as they were all on the ground Sirius and Remus came out.

"I was going to do that, you just got to it first." Sirius said helping Remus off the floor.

"Sure you could, Si" James teased. "Why do they have multicolored hair?"

"Umm, it was a defensive maneuver, it easily distracted them allowing us to get to safety." James laughed.

"In other words it was the first thing that popped in your head."

"Yep."

"Are you boys alright?" The librarian asked.

"I'm fine. What about you Rem?"

"I'm fine."

The librarian nodded then levitated the Slytherins out of the library, not bothering to make sure they didn't hit their heads on anything.

"She is really mad they made a mess in her library." Sirius observed, Remus laughed quietly.

"She'll be even madder when she sees what they did with her books." He said picking up a book and watching as the pages fell out. "In fact when she does she may want their heads on a silver platter." James and Sirius nodded.

"We should probably leave before she comes back."

"That is a good idea."

The walked out of the library and headed towards the common room.

"Why did they attack you Remus?" James asked curiously.

"I'm not really sure."

"I think it's obvious why, it's because of all the pranks we've pulled on them. I think we need to find a better way to protect ourselves we're beginning to become a target." Sirius suggested and they all knew he was right.

"True, we will probably have to do it quickly too, we can't wait till the teachers teach us how."

"I can teach you some of the stuff I know to start with, that way we can all be on the same level. I can also learn at home. I'm going to have plenty of time alone this summer." Sirius said the last bit rather bitterly.

"You can't, It's illegal to do magic outside of school." Remus said.

"They only enforce that rule on muggleborns, Remus." James explained

"Why?"

"Because they have no way of telling when a person with wizards in their family is doing magic, they can only tell that magic was performed around the underage wizard, not who is performing the magic."

"That's annoying, would they be able to tell if I did magic at home?"

"Not if your around your dad." Sirius told him. "Which is dumb because we don't have to be anywhere near our parents."

"Dad said they don't bother putting sensors on pure-bloods because there is so much magic around them that it would be going off so often that it isn't worth it." James told them, he had already explained that his dad worked for the Ministry of Magic.

"Oh." Sirius said the password for the Gryffindor common room. "Peter!"

James and Remus followed Sirius' gaze and saw peter sitting on the couch by himself. He looked up fearfully at Sirius.

"Where have you been!" He yelled though knowing the answer.

"Um...I" Peter stuttered.

James watched as Sirius' expression turned murderous. He had apparently been hoping Peter had left before the Slytherins attacked, but Peter knew exactly what had happened. He sighed, he couldn't defend Peter this time.

"What is wrong with you! If you were going to run away like a coward at least get a teacher or something! What if Remus had gotten hurt!" Everyone in the room was watching Sirius yell.

"Um.." Peter couldn't even think of an excuse, he looked to James hopefully. James just shook his head.

"I'm not going to make excuses for you every time you screw up Peter." James told him. Sirius continued glaring and Remus sighed.

"Come on guys. It's over with now let's just forget about it." Sirius growled and stomped to their dorm not agreeing to anything. James followed him hoping to calm him down.

"Told you I was a coward." Peter said quietly and was surprised when Remus answered.

"The only thing you're doing that's cowardly is not trying to be brave. You could be brave if you were willing to face you fears, but you won't, you run away from them and expect them to just turn out okay while you're gone. This time it worked but next time, James and Sirius might not be there to fix what you ran away from." Remus told him before following them up the stairs.

Peter didn't follow, he knew he had been sorted into the wrong house.

A/N) Hi again. This chapter, was mostly just character development. It was actually really hard, because when I started it I really had no idea what I was going to put in it. I really had no plan on them being attacked, I just wanted to mention that they did do some studying, and I noticed it was kind of starting to get boring so I let Remus get bullied. Weird how my mind works, I want entertainment so I put in a fight .

Wow, this story is 130 pages in a word document. I'm rather proud of myself.

Thanks to Lovealwayshopes for her support of this story. It's really helped me keep going.

I hope I'm not boreing you to death. Next chapter the Map is back! Until then my loyal readers! I bid you adieu.