EPOV

By the time the following Friday rolls around, I'm packing up the last of my toiletries when my phone rings. Flashing on the screen is a picture of Delores Umbridge, and I wince. I don't want to talk to Bella when I'm about to be in an enclosed space with her for eight days.

Reluctantly, I pick up my phone, swiping to answer. "How can I help you, Satan?"

"Hilarious." She sighs deeply. "Have you spoken to your lover Jasper today?"

"Not really, why?"

"He apparently thinks that if we drive ourselves, we won't actually go to the cabin."

Dropping my toiletry bag into my duffle, I pace around my bedroom. "What do you mean? They gave us an ultimatum. It's this or we're out. Did you talk to your conjoined twin?"

She snorts out a laugh. "Yeah, she actually agrees with him. Can you believe that?"

I stop short, pausing to think. Do our best friends really think so little of us? "Uh, Bella? Maybe we need to be really careful." I sink down onto the armchair in my room, running my free hand through my hair.

"What are you talking about? We agreed to a truce. It'll be like the Christmas truce of 1914."

Rolling my eyes, I fight back a retort; everything this woman says is layered with an attitude of arrogance about how smart she is.

"I can be an adult, Bella. I'm sure you can too … if you try hard enough." I stand up, needing to end this conversation sooner rather than later. "So, what's the plan then? I was going to pick you up at noon tomorrow."

"The car service is going to pick me up, and then we'll come get you. They'll drop us off at the cabin, and then we're on our own."

"What if we have an emergency? What about food?"

"Alice has promised us a stocked kitchen, and she said there are bikes at the cabin."

So I'll be essentially stranded for eight days with this harpy, with no means of escaping.

"Please tell me there's plenty of booze?"

"I have no idea, but I'm at Costco picking some up."

"I'd never thought I'd say this, ever … but you're a genius." I can feel the smile creep across my face and wonder if we might survive.

"Of course, I am. But I never said I was sharing with you, asshole."

The line goes dead, and I sigh.

With Bella, nothing was ever that easy.