(Darry's POV)

When I woke up, the sun was shining through the window, and I was still sitting in the chair next to the bed. My head was tiled backwards, so even before I straightened my neck, I knew I was going to be sore. I was awake most of the night, so I figured I couldn't have dozed off for long. I immediately looked down at the bed, and Ponyboy was still sleeping, but to my surprise, Soda was gone. He was here before I fell asleep. Where did he go?

After confirming that he was still breathing, I reached forward to check Ponyboy's temperature once again. He didn't even flinch at the touch, and he was very warm. I debated taking a few of the blankets off to cool him down, but I wasn't sure if that would've been the best idea after the night he had. Instead, I took one blanket off and left it on the end of the bed.

I ran my fingers through his hair. "Well you're not cold anymore. That's a good thing, right?" He was still out of it and still needed to rest, so I knew he wasn't going to answer, but a part of me still wished he would have responded. "I'm so sorry, Pone."

That's when I heard several voices outside of the bedroom.

Some of the voices were louder than others, but I couldn't distinguish any words that were spoken since multiple people were talking at the same time. The front door slammed once, and there was a short-lived silence. Then, I could finally hear the conversation.

"You sure you're okay, Soda?" Steve asked.

Steve's here?

"I'm fine," Soda said. Even without seeing his face, I could tell he was tired and not entirely fine.

Steve waited a moment before replying. "Alright, I'll see ya later." Then the door shut again, but this time it was a little quieter.

There was some mumbling, and then Soda spoke again. "Let me check on them."

A few seconds later, Soda appeared in the doorway. In the morning sunlight, I could clearly see his injuries that I had noticed the previous night: the cut in his lip, the scabbed-over cut above his eyebrow, and a dark bruise on his jaw. In addition, he had a couple faint bruises and small cuts on his arms, and dark bags under his eyes. As soon as Soda looked at me, his eyes widened slightly. "You're awake."

I scoffed. "Yeah, but it seems like I missed a party out there."

Soda grinned and sat on the bed next to Ponyboy. "You didn't miss much, just the gang getting' caught up on things." He narrowed his eyes at me. "You should get some rest, Dar. You've only been sleepin' for an hour."

I shook my head. "I'm fine. How do you know when I fell asleep?"

Soda shrugged his shoulders. "I couldn't stay asleep for long, kept wakin' up. You were up all night, of course," Soda said with a small smirk. "After you finally fell asleep, I stuck around for a while, then I went to check on Johnny. I got a few things squared away before the guys started showin' up."

I looked at the clock and noticed that it was already nine o'clock– much later than I usually woke up. I rubbed my hand over my face. "I'm surprised none of them barged in here. What did they all have to say?"

"Steve's covering for me at work," Soda said. The guardian side of me thought about how difficult it would make things for us financially if Soda missed work, but the brother part of me was glad he could stay at home with Ponyboy. And me. Then Soda gave me a strange look that reminded me of when a kid knows he did something wrong and he had to admit it. He felt guilty about something. "Don't get mad, Darry… but when you were sleeping, I talked to your boss."

I was confused. That doesn't make any sense. "What? Why?"

He sighed. "I don't know how Pony's gonna be once he wakes up, and with everything that happened… I didn't know how you would be doin'." I wanted to say something, but he interrupted me. "It's okay, Dar. I told your boss that there was a family emergency, but I didn't give him too many details. He's giving you the week off, with pay."

I was shocked. My 16 year-old brother got both of our work situations sorted out for me while I slept. He figured out a way for us to stay with Pony and make sure that he was going to be okay without having to figure out how we could afford to do it. "Thanks, little buddy. I really appreciate it."

Soda just smiled back.

"Can I come in?" A voice asked from behind Soda.

I looked up and found Two-Bit standing in the doorway. "Hey, Two-Bit. Come on in," I said.

Two-Bit slowly walked to the side of the room opposite from the bed. He leaned against the dresser and looked at Ponyboy. "How's the kid? Has he woken up yet?"

I shook my head. "Not yet, but he's warmed up. I'm hoping he's just tired and he'll wake up later."

"I don't blame him for being tired," Two-Bit said with a nod. "Scary shit went down last night."

"You got that right," I muttered. Flashes of the previous night went through my mind, so I shook my head trying to get the imagines to disappear. "Anyone else still here? I heard a few people out there."

"Nah, everyone else is gone. Steve went to work, and Dally took Johnny to go find those Socs," Two-Bit said. Then he smiled. "Steve and I are going to meet up with Dally later… teach those Socs a lesson."

I usually didn't agree with any of our gang looking for revenge, especially when it came to fighting the Socs since it usually ended up in one of our guys getting in trouble, but for once, I wanted the Socs to pay. They almost killed Ponyboy. They almost killed my kid brother.

Suddenly needing some space, I stood up. "Take my spot, Two-Bit. I need to stretch my legs."

I knew Soda and Two-Bit watched me as I walked out of the room, but I couldn't force myself to look back at them. I walked out the back door and was hit with fresh air and sunshine. I walked a few feet to the left before I leaned my back and head against the house. At the moment I felt my composure crumble, my knees gave out. I found myself sitting on the ground, elbows resting on my bent knees, and my face buried in my hands.

They drowned Ponyboy. He stopped breathing. I somehow managed to bring him back, but what if I couldn't? Ponyboy could be dead because of me. I knew he hated me, but now I know I deserve it.

I knew I was sobbing, but I didn't care. I felt like I had a good reason to cry, and nobody was around to see me.

Or so I thought.

I heard a noise to my right, and before I knew it, an arm was draped over my shoulders. I knew without looking that it was Soda. I tried my best to stop crying and I wiped the tears from my face, but once glance at Soda told me that I didn't need to pretend to be strong.

"It's okay, Darry," Soda said softly.

I shook my head and kept wiping my wet cheeks. "Nothing about what happened is okay."

Soda was silent for a moment, but when he finally spoke, he reminded me of Dad. "What's going through your head?"

Normally, I'd never voice my problems to my brothers since it was my job to protect them, not the other way around. However, this was an extreme scenario, and I wasn't going to last long if I didn't tell anyone. "It's all my fault."

"What's your fault?" Soda asked softly.

"Everything that happened," I replied with a shaky voice. "He almost died because of me, Soda. We almost lost our brother because of me."

"Don't say that, Darry. That ain't true-"

"Yes, it is!" I snapped. Even though I was harsher than I intended, Soda didn't even flinch. "He wouldn't have run into those guys if he didn't run out of the house, and he only did that because I hit him. They drowned him because of me." I buried my face in my hands again. "I can't believe I hit him. I don't know what came over me. Mom and Dad never did that to us."

"Mistakes happen, Dar. Even to someone as perfect as you." He pulled me closer to his side. "None of this is your fault. The Socs that put Pony in that fountain are the ones responsible for us almost losing him, not the guy who saved his life." I knew it was difficult for Soda to vocalize how close Pony came to dying, and my heart ached for him.

I shook my head. "He wouldn't have needed saving if we didn't have that fight." I took my face away from my hands and leaned the back of my head against the house. "We've been fighting ever since Mom and Dad died, and I know he resents me for it." I groaned. "He hates me, and I don't blame him."

"Darry, listen to me. Pony doesn't hate you; he loves you. You two just don't communicate with each other real well," Soda said in a soft, caring tone. "You gotta remember, he's barely fourteen. He's still a kid. He feels things differently than the rest of us– he feels deeply about everything, so he takes things personally." Soda paused, but I didn't say anything, so he continued. "And you don't like to show your emotions or feel vulnerable, so when you're worried, you act mad so nobody knows how you really feel. And nothin' worries you more than our kid brother."

I nodded. "You got that right."

I sat there, digesting what Soda said. I knew he was right about me– I hated to show vulnerability to anyone, but especially to my brothers and the rest of the gang. I wasn't sure if he was right about Pony loving me though, especially since we had been arguing almost every day.

Sensing my hesitation, Soda spoke again. "You know, Pony feels the same way you do." After reading the confusion on my face, he explained. "You feel like Pony hates you, but he doesn't. And Pony thinks you hate him, and I know that ain't true."

I felt like somebody punched me in the gut. "He thinks I hate him?"

Soda sighed. "I've told him it ain't true, and I think deep down he knows. But look at it from his point of view… you two argue a lot. You yell at him for every mistake he makes, and he knows that you gave up a lot to be our guardian. You could've gotten out of Tulsa and gone to college, but instead, you're stuck with us. I think he feels like you sometimes regret the decision of staying with us, and he feels responsible for it."

And just like that, tears started streaming down my cheeks again. "It wasn't even a decision, Soda. We were going to stay together, no matter what. There was no way in hell I was going to let the state split us up." Soda gave me a small smile. I wrapped my arms around him, and he immediately returned the embrace. "I'm going to do everything I can to keep us together, and I don't just mean living in the same house. I'm going to make sure Pony and I talk." I reached up and put my hand on Soda's head and ruffled his hair. "I'm sorry you've been the middleman all this time. Thank you for being there for us."

"Anything for family." He tightened his arms around me. "Love you, Darry."

"Love you too, Sodapop."

After we separated, I saw that Soda's eyes were red, and he immediately started wiping his tears. I wanted to tell him he didn't need to, but then the back door swung open.

"There you are," Two-Bit said. "I think Ponyboy's looking for you. He's groaning and mumbling in his sleep."

"Who's he lookin' for?" Soda asked.

I scoffed. "Obviously you, Soda."

"Actually, he's been sayin' both your names," Two-Bit said with a grin. "He wants both of his big brothers." I knew Two-Bit could probably tell we had been crying, but he was a good buddy and didn't mention anything about it.

Soda turned his head and gave me a look that said I told you so. He stood up and extended his hand towards me. I accepted his help, and once I was on my feet, I followed him into the house with Two-Bit leading the way.