A Song of the Heart

A When Calls the Heart hope-filled story

Chapter One

Inquiring Minds

Bill was distracted this morning. He almost dropped his mug of coffee. He caught the bacon just before it burned. Quickly moving the pan off the burner, he flipped the eggs, realizing they were almost ready to brown. "Not my best morning," he muttered.

"What was that?" Clara asked.

"Nothing!" Bill replied brusquely as he slid the eggs onto a plate, added bacon and handed it to Clara.

Familiar with Bill's oft curmudgeon-like ways, Clara made no further inquiries and turned to deliver the plate to the final breakfast customer in the Café's dining room. Bill was probably stressed because Mrs. Jenkins couldn't work until later this morning.

"Ouch!" Bill exclaimed from the kitchen, as pans clattered. Clara ran back to find Bill waving his hand in the air while this time muttering in earnest! "That blasted pan. I forgot it was still hot!"

Clara grabbed the honey from the shelf, applied it to Bill's burned hand and wrapped it in a linen towel. Assuring him that she would clean up at the Café and stay until Mrs. Jenkins arrived, she sent him to the Infirmary.

Forgetting his intended destination, Bill determinedly walked right past the doctor's office and arrived at his office.

Bill dropped heavily into the chair behind his desk. Looking out over the Judge's office, he recalled the Mountie inquiry that had ended yesterday. All night he had replayed the accusations and words that had filled his office. He'd had little sleep. Something was wrong. It was unsettling. Bill's instincts were first heightened when he had noticed Nathan's interaction with Superintendent Andrew Hargraves upon his arrival the previous week. Both men said that they had "crossed paths," yet that wasn't sufficient to explain the animosity Bill had observed.

Further conversations with Andrew hadn't offered any satisfactory answers, and Andrew's comment, "Nathan didn't tell you about what happened at Fort Clay then?" only made Bill more uneasy.

Then there was Nathan. Grateful for Allie's impassioned plea and the decision to close the inquiry, exonerating Nathan, Bill had watched Allie run, jump and hug her uncle as he emerged from the Judge's office. Deciding to let them have their space rather than follow-up with more personal inquiries at that time, Bill did not go after them. Yet he knew there was more to discuss and, earlier that morning, Nathan had barely answered his questions.

Bill didn't doubt Nathan's truthfulness as he had never known him to be anything less than honest. Nathan was soft-spoken but firm, careful but truthful, wise but prudent. Yet when a man of integrity, a man you know, cannot hold your gaze and only responds with one-word answers, something is definitely wrong.

Over the past couple years since Nathan had served in Hope Valley, Bill had grown to appreciate Nathan as both friend and colleague. He trusted Nathan with his life and together they had proven their Mountie instincts and skills on more than one occasion. Bill had even begun to think of Nathan as a beloved son, right alongside Jack Thornton.

Thoughts of Jack brought Bill's attention back to what Andrew had mentioned throughout the Mountie Inquiry. Andrew constantly wanted to refer back to events that happened at Fort Clay. It had been news to Bill that Nathan had even served at Fort Clay! He was surprised Nathan had never mentioned it and knew he needed to address this further with Nathan.

"So I need a plan," Bill stated emphatically. His words echoed in the empty office and he startled himself.

Opening his desk drawer he retrieved pen and paper. "A plan," he thought, sitting back down and staring at the blank page. "A plan? No, I need to start with a list!"

Bill divided the page into two columns. One he labeled 'What I know.' The other he labeled 'Need to know.'

Before he could begin to fill-in the columns, the office door opened and Molly entered. Usually she was a welcome distraction, but today he had to try extra hard to concentrate on what she was saying.

"Cleaning? Later this afternoon? Oh, okay. Sure."

Smiling, Molly turned around and closed the door, leaving the scent of lilies behind.

Bill remained unsettled, but the interruption left him without words to even think.

Nathan awakened refreshed. He stretched. The past few nights had been sleepless, but last night he had slept solidly. He laid in bed, watching the sun filter through the curtains as he thought and prayed.

"Thank you, Lord, for a new day. Thank you for Allie and her sweet love. What a privilege to have her in my life, in my home. When I took her in I thought it was for her, but now I know it was just as much for me. She has brought me such joy and laughter. So many hugs amidst the challenges. Thank you for opening my eyes to the depth of her love for me yesterday. Wow, God, she was amazing! Help me bless, guide and love her today. I pray this will be a special day for Allie at school. Protect her and continue to grow her into Your girl, Lord."

Nathan sat up, swinging to sit on the edge of the bed as he continued. "Lord, thank you for the final outcome of the Inquiry. Thank you for Bill and the blessing he is to me. Thank you for his antics and how You used them to redirect the questioning yesterday!" Nathan laughed, remembering. "Help me be a blessing to him today."

"Thank you too for dear Lizabeth. Lord, You know how I love her, how I long for her. You know how it hurts right now. But, You also know rejection, so You understand. Please help me to keep showing her love, whatever this day brings. Show her your love as well. Your will be done. Amen."

Hearing stirrings from the kitchen below, Nathan rose and dressed while humming an Irish folk tune. He hadn't meant to sleep late, but he decided he had needed it.

Allie was busy fixing oatmeal porridge when Nathan came downstairs. She turned and grinned, "Hi Uncle Nathan!" She ran over to give him a quick hug before returning to her breakfast preparations. "I made your coffee and thought we could add some honey to the cereal today?" Allie bustled about the kitchen, placed a basket of scones and a jar of blackberry jam on the table, between stirs of the cereal.

Nathan immediately joined the preparations and set out silverware and the napkins. Allie served while he poured his coffee and they both sat down to eat.

Reaching their hands across the table Allie said, "Can I pray today? Please?"

Nathan nodded and Allie offered a heartfelt prayer of thanks for the results of the Inquiry, for their day ahead, for her uncle Nathan, her teacher, her friends… "Oh, yes, and thanks for the food! Amen." She concluded.

"Amen," Nathan added, smiling as he opened his eyes and gazed at her. He couldn't wait until her adoption was official. His daughter. Allie.

As they ate breakfast Nathan and Allie discussed their day. It was the final school day before graduation, so Allie was excited but also a little sad. She was prepared for her recitation and song at the ceremony, but she wasn't prepared to not see her teacher, Mrs. Thornton, and all her friends every day. Summer would be long!

Uncle Nathan had promised they would do a lot of fishing, have picnics and go horseback riding. He had also surprised her and asked Mrs. Ashley to give her some art lessons. Allie had a lot to look forward to, but as they rose from the table and she looked at her uncle, she saw a brief shadow pass over his face at the mention of Mrs. Thornton. Allie hurt to see her uncle hurt and she could not understand what was happening with him and with Mrs. Thornton. Even in class her teacher seemed different, but ever since she had cancelled dinner with Uncle Nathan, Little Jack & her, Mrs. Thornton had also been sad. She still smiled, but she often wore the same sad expression as Uncle Nathan had right now.

"Uncle Nathan, can we pick some wildflowers for Mrs. Thornton on the way to school?"

Nathan looked up, adjusted his expression, and said, "What about Mrs. Thornton?"

Allie knew he hadn't been listening. "Can we pick some wildflowers for her this morning?"

"Um, sure, Allie." Nathan buckled his belt as Allie helped bring the strap over his shoulder. She waited as he tightened the strap, then pulled his red serge down to straighten the wrinkles. It was their daily ritual and today she wrapped her arms around her uncle, holding him tightly.

Looking up, she whispered, "I love you, Uncle Nathan."

Nathan's arms held her snugly as he responded, "Oh Allie-girl, I love you too. So much."

"So, are you ready?"

Allie relaxed her hug and retrieved her lunch pail and book-bag. "I am now!"

Gathering wildflowers into a pretty bouquet along the way, Nathan and Allie neared the schoolhouse. Mrs. Thornton stood at the bottom of the steps, bell in hand while watching them approach. She spoke first, "Good morning, Allie, Nathan." She took a deep breath and continued, "It's a beautiful morning isn't it?"

"It is," Nathan replied.

Nathan squeezed Allie's shoulders and kissed the top of her head. Then, glancing down he said quietly, "Bye for now, my sweet girl."

She looked up with a smile, "Bye for now!" and ran to give the flowers to her teacher.

Nathan smiled, waved and turned towards the stables, unaware that Mrs. Thornton was distractedly accepting the flowers while she watched Nathan walk away. Allie saw it though and grinned, climbing the steps to school. "Yeah. I know," she thought as she smiled.

As Nathan made his rounds, he hoped for a quiet, easy day. After his inner turmoil with Elizabeth over the past weeks, and his challenge at the Mountie Inquiry these past few days, Nathan felt he needed a break. A vacation. His rounds uneventful, Nathan turned the corner and his heart sank. Two Mountie horses were tethered outside the door of the Mountie office.

"What's the meaning of this?" Nathan wondered as he dismounted and tied Newton to the post. Giving his faithful horse a pat, he climbed the steps, bracing himself. Nathan opened the door to see Commander Ash sitting in his desk chair with Commander Marshall across from him. Nathan breathed a relieved sigh, thinking, "At least it's not Hargraves."

"Good morning Sirs," Nathan spoke cautiously, nodding at each of his superior officers. "I thought you were departing earlier this morning."

Commander Ash smiled and stood. "I wanted to speak to you before we left, Constable."

"I am sorry to keep you waiting, Sir. Sirs. I just completed my rounds."

"Understood, Constable. I had hoped to talk to you after the Inquiry concluded, but you disappeared with your niece. By the way, she is quite a young lady. Admirable, strong, brave and articulate, much like you. You are her guardian, am I right?"

"Yes, Sir, for more than six years no." Nathan volunteered, "I am in the process of formally adopting her."

"Good. Good. You are raising her well and it is obvious, she loves you very much!" He smiled and glanced at his comrade who nodded.

"Thank you, Sirs. I love her as well."

"Of course you do." Commander Ash paused for a moment. "I must say I have been impressed with your character from the first day I heard of you taking on that responsibility as a single man. Lesser men would have found a way out of child-rearing as a single parent. We need more men like you."

Nathan lowered his head, not knowing what to say.

The Commander continued. "There are a couple items I want to mention to you as well as a couple questions."

Nathan hung his hat on the rack and joined his hands behind his back. He looked from one Commander to the other, uncertain what to expect.

Commander Ash cleared his throat. "Constable Grant I want you to know you handled yourself well throughout these past few days. We both agree." The Commander glanced at his colleague before continuing, "I recognize there is some history between Superintendent Hargraves and yourself, but that is not the issue for today. Just know I saw it. Today, I want you to know that your concluding remarks touched me deeply. I doubt I have ever heard such an impressive admission. You expressed the heart of a Mountie. That leads me to my next question, "How well do you know Mrs. Thornton?"

Startled, Nathan sucked in a breath. He never expected that question.

"Sir," Nathan paused, "Mrs. Thornton is Allie's schoolteacher… and we have become friends."

"I figured as much," replied the Commander. He continued, "I understand you declined the offer of the Inspector position in Union City this past Christmas?"

Nathan gave a slight nod, "Yes, Sir."

Commander Ash steadily held his gaze on Nathan, then questioned, "Is Mrs. Thornton the reason you chose to remain in Hope Valley?"

Nathan swallowed hard, wondering where this line of questioning was headed. He maintained his attention on the Commander while responding, "Sir, I chose to stay in Hope Valley for Allie's sake, as well as for the friends we have made."

The Commander noted Nathan's discomfort and sought to reassure him. "Constable, please do not be alarmed. If your interest in Mrs. Thornton extends beyond her being Allie's teacher and your friend, I totally understand. I have no problem with that. I believe she is one of the 'family members' to whom you referred in your remarks yesterday? She is one you have chosen to honor and serve?"

Nathan glanced down before raising his eyes once more to the Commander. "She and her young son are included in those to whom I referred." He felt the heat rise to his cheeks.

"Hmmhmm," voiced the Commander. "I thought as much."

He motioned to his colleague who stood.

"Constable, do I assume correctly that you still wish to remain in Hope Valley?"

"I do, Sir."

"Good. Thank you for answering my questions. Your remarks yesterday prompted an idea in my mind. I have some discussions to attend to at Headquarters, but I will be in touch."

Turning to his colleague, he queried, "I believe we are ready to depart?" Turning back to Nathan once again, he put out his hand. Surprised at the informality, Nathan took it, giving him a firm handshake.

The Commander noticed Nathan was holding his breath.

"Breathe, son. Breathe." he said quietly as he moved his hand to Nathan's shoulder. "You have my admiration and I think my idea is a good one for you."

Nathan exhaled slowly. "Thank you, Sir, and safe travels to you both." He saluted both of his superiors who returned his salute and left the office. Nathan watched as they mounted their horses and each gave the common, but hardly perceptible, nod.

Nathan took a deep breath, let is out slowly as he closed the door and went to his chair. His knees felt a bit wobbly. "I did NOT see that coming. Whew!"

Before Nathan could formulate another thought, the door swung open to a rough-looking Bill.

"Uh oh," thought Nathan.

"Why were those two Mounties in here, Nathan?" Bill grunted as he took the seat across from Nathan.

Nathan backed up his chair. "They had some questions to ask me."

"And?"

Nathan sighed, "It was all good." Pausing he added, "I think."

"You think?"

Many years of questioning had taught Bill how to draw out information, but they both knew the tactic and Nathan just quietly looked at him.

"Care to elaborate?"

"No. Not now," Nathan knew Bill well. He knew Bill was on a mission and was waiting, wanting him to reveal something, out loud.

Exasperated, Bill leaned in to Nathan. "Okay. If that's the way you want to play this. Here's another question. What happened at Fort Clay?"

Nathan had expected this inquiry from Bill. Cautiously, he answered, "Hargraves and I crossed paths. I told you that already."

"That. That is not what I am asking. Hargraves told me that. You told me that. You also told me about the formal reprimand, following and arresting the cattle rustlers. I am talking about something else. What else happened at Fort Clay?" Bill stared hard at Nathan.

"I am not prepared to answer that question."

Bill's voice rose a notch. "Prepared?"

"Okay, I am not ready to answer that question."

Bill gave his most withering look to his friend.

"Bill. I cannot answer, okay?"

"Not okay, Nathan. Not okay at all." Bill could see a story there, but couldn't break down Nathan's internal barrier. Temporarily postponing that line of questioning, he sighed.

"Let me ask another question then. You said you never met, you never served with Jack Thornton while you were at Fort Clay?"

Nathan quietly answered although he diverted his gaze, "No, Bill. As I have told you, I never had the honor."

"But you knew about Jack? You knew about his death?"

Nathan shifted in his chair. It was not the time to get into this. "Jack Thornton's reputation, his story, was widely circulated among the Mounties. We didn't know many details but his heroic action to save those Mounties became a legend very quickly." Although the truth, in an effort to diffuse Bill, he added, "He was an excellent Mountie."

Bill stared at him. There was something Nathan was not saying. He felt the unspoken was far more important than the words he'd just heard.

Bill waited.

Nathan remained silent.

"So is that all you are going to say?" Bill questioned.

"For now, it is."

There is was. Nathan was telling Bill that there was something he was not telling Bill. Now, Bill knew it was connected to Jack.

"And, Nathan, when will it be the time to tell?"

"I just don't have anything more to say right now, Bill."

"You will not or you cannot?"

"Both," replied Nathan as he raised sad eyes to stare at Bill.

Bill recognized that look. It was the end of the conversation. Yet only, as Nathan had just said, for now! Bill stood slowly.

"I'll let you get back to work." Bill emphasized, "For now."

Nathan nodded as Bill departed, then as the door shut, put his head in his hands. This burden was getting increasingly heavy to bear. Still, he knew his friend Bill, Elizabeth, the entire town—no one was ready to hear what happened at Fort Clay.

"God, help me." Nathan verbalized his prayer, then lifted his head to attend to the Mountie business of the day as best he could.