"Summons?" Kakashi-sensei drawls, an eyebrow raised at his three impossible little Genin. "I leave you alone for two days and you manage to acquire summons?"
"Well technically we had the scrolls the whole time, we just chose to use them now." Sakura reasons.
"Semantics, cub." Kakashi counters. "Summons are no joke, you three. Holding a contract is a defining part of a shinobi's life. You need to take it seriously."
"Yes, sensei," the three of them echo.
They sit in the heart of training ground three, taking a break from morning exercises. They're all progressing fantastically on their basic skill sets, the bread and butter of shinobi fighting techniques. "Don't practice until you get it right," Gai always says "Practice until you can't get it wrong!" It's good advice despite its source, and Kakashi has always put a high value on being able to react to any situation, to adapt to any variable.
He's found the best way to get them to focus, to get the most out of every minute of training, is to make it all a game. So he takes some of his most advanced team training techniques, (originally designed for those of Chunin rank or higher, since anything less wouldn't be a challenge) and dresses them up with competition and rivalry and reward. It's been working so well that he's started doing it with as many techniques and training regimens as he can, all molded after their first morning training sessions. The tradition had held, and almost all their mornings now start with what is essentially ninja tag. They play until the cubs get exhausted and give in, but they get closer and closer to catching him each time.
It's good for keeping Kakashi on his toes, if nothing else.
It's clear living together has resulted in a few notable changes, even after only a few days with all three of them crammed together. They're getting better and better at communicating without words, and Sakura has become more thoroughly entrenched in their team dynamic. All that's really left is smoothing out the kinks and teaching new techniques and formations.
There are also the changes that are more obvious at first glance– like how Sakura regularly and obviously steals Naruto's dark orange sweatpants and how some of the shirts Sasuke comes to training wearing have a little orange spiral stitched on the back somewhere. The opposite is true as well if the Uchiha crest Kakashi can see sticking out of Naruto's collar is any indication.
Kakashi shoves a hand into his pocket and flicks his Icha-Icha closed, tucking it back into his pouch. "Alright then, change of plans. We're playing Three Monkeys, and then we're going to start training with your new summons."
"What rotation?" Sasuke asks, already moving to stand. They've been questioning him less and less lately, and the lack of backtalk is starting to freak Kakashi out a little. Sure, they still sass him about everything from morning exercises to what they order for lunch, but they listen to him– all the time in combat and most of the time outside it.
He wasn't sure it was a good or a bad thing, that these kids and their strong personalities and drives have started following his orders and instructions almost unconditionally, by when he'd mentioned it to Iruka he'd just laughed and told him that he's already in way over his head.
He's afraid what Genma would have to say on the matter, or worse, Gai, so he's kept the questions to himself.
"Weaknesses, today." Kakashi answers.
There's a unanimous groan.
"Now now, don't give me that." He chastises. "It will get you into the mindset of adapting to uncomfortable situations. Summons are a big part of combat and you need to be adaptable with them to form unique fighting bonds and formations. Now come on, handicaps."
This particular game is one Kakashi developed using ideas from the Anbu sensory deprivation training he remembers from his younger days, a combination defensive and adaptive training.
Each of the three brats are deprived of either speech, hearing, or sight for the duration of the game. The goal it to get from point A to point B without getting 'killed' or tagged by Kakashi. They have two main rotations of the game, playing to 'strengths' and playing to 'weaknesses'. Weaknesses deprives them of their greatest asset, and strengths deprives them of superfluous senses to hone those assets.
"This version always stresses me out." Naruto whines, going through the minor hands signs for the shinobi equivalent of earplugs.
"Ugh." Sasuke agrees, but finishes his hand signs and closes his eyes, allowing the jutsu to seal them shut.
Sakura doesn't respond, but when she's finished her hand signs she taps her throat to let Kakashi know her own jutsu is in place.
Hear no evil, see no evil, speak no evil. Jiraiya would be proud of the allegory.
He begins to count down, both out loud and on his fingers, and the three of them spring into motion. There are three places that the brats are allowed to use as their goal safe zones; Iruka's apartment, Iruka's academy classroom, and Ichiraku Ramen. The three form a near equilateral triangle just shy of the Hokage tower and administrative buildings, and each one has a different set of advantages– Ichiraku is almost always filled with people and it's easier for the brats to lose him in the crowds or the marketplace at certain times of the day, Iruka's apartment has open roofs and close-cornered alleys to cut and dodge around, and the academy has both crowds and close hallways that make tracking difficult. The last is the obvious choice, but it also happens to be the farthest away.
He tucks his final finger back into his palm and cracks his knuckles. He wonders who'll win this particular match for a moment, but then figures it doesn't really matter. He wins either way.
"Oh come on, Shikamaru. We've only been at if for a few hours!"
"Leave him alone, Ino. We can take a break, can't we?" Choji groans, casting pleading puppy eyes over towards Asuma.
Their teacher sighs around his cigarette, eyes tracing between the angry blonde, the hungry brunet, and the Nara napping under the tree. "I suppose." he allows.
"But sensei, how are we going to get better if we don't train?"
"'How am I going to catch up to Sakura' you mean." Shikamaru mumbles.
Ino flushes. "That is not what this is about."
"Good, because you don't need to compare yourself to her anyway," Shikamaru mutters under his breath, and then by all appearances rolls over on the grass and goes back to sleep.
Ino freezes for a second, momentarily stunned, but then she shakes the surprise off like a bird shaking out its feathers and with a bewildered half-smile she sends a playful glare at his back. "Do you always have to make your compliments sound like insults?" she grouses.
"I'm not complimenting you," he says drowsily, interrupting himself with a yawn. "I'm just stating fact."
Before Ino can come up with an appropriate response to that, there's a rustling behind her in the trees, just a few soft steps that crunch the undergrowth enough to announce a presence. Asuma looks up and raises an eyebrow at the intruder.
"Shiranui? What are you doing clear out here?" Asuma asks, and Ino turns around to see a tall Tokujo standing in the shade of an elm, light shining in his copper hair and glinting off the senbon tucked between his teeth.
"Recruiting." The man says without preamble. "You up to anything pressing at the moment?"
Asuma gestures to Shika Ino and Choji as his answer.
"You can bring your brats. In fact I'd prefer if you did." The Tokujo admits, ticking the senbon in his mouth up and down so that it flashes in the light. "The more hands we have the better."
Asuma narrows his eyes and stands. "What's this about exactly?"
"Iruka will explain once we have enough people, but let's just say it has something to do with everyone's favorite emotionally stunted Jounin."
Asuma huffs, amused. "I know about half a dozen people who fit that description, but I'm going to assume you're talking about Kakashi."
The Tokujo nods, grinning widely. "So, are you in or not? We have to get this done while he's distracted by his kids or we'll never pull it off."
Asuma looks down at his three Genin. "Your training session, your choice."
Shikamaru sits up and sways to his feet, all trace of laziness gone. "I'm in, sounds more interesting than training anyway."
"Will there be snacks?" Choji asks hopefully. "I'm starving."
"One more time Konohamaru, you've almost got it."
The little brunet nods, shaking out his hands and flicking his long blue scarf back over his shoulder. He makes the hand signs again; still a little clumsy for his young fingers, but this time the clone that puffs into existence looks virtually identical Konohamaru, if a little pale.
"Much better." he praises, giving Konohamaru's messy brown hair a pat. "We'll work on the timing and the chakra moulding speed, but for now, well done."
Konohamaru beams and whoops, punching the air in victory, and Iruka tolerates the display with a patient smile and nudges the boy back towards his peers.
He's about to beckon his next student forward when the window across the room bursts open and three bodies fall through it, sprawling over each other and the floor with groans of pain and relief in equal measure. Every eight-year-old head in the room swivels at the intrusion, fixing on the pile that is team seven, rolling around and extracting limbs from under torsos and other limbs.
Iruka only breathes out a put upon sigh and raises an eyebrow. "Is this going to become a regular thing with you three?"
Naruto rolls to his feet, shoulder to shoulder with Sasuke as they both haul Sakura up after them. He flicks his fingers through a few hand signs and then scrapes his fingers over his ears, undoing a deafening jutsu. "Sorry sensei, what was that?"
"Our apologies, Iruka-sensei." Sasuke says as he rubs a similar sensory deprivation jutsu out of his eyes.
"I just don't know why you three insist on using my home and workplace as safe zones for training." Iruka mutters.
"Isn't it obvious, sensei?" Sakura chirps. "You scare all the Jounin, even Kakashi-sensei!"
"Especially Kakashi-sensei." Naruto corrects.
The squad of kids at Iruka's feet all turn and look at him with some kind of surprised awe, and Iruka grimaces.
"Well, while you three are here, you might as well make yourselves useful. Class, this is Haruno Sakura, Uchiha Sasuke, and Uzumaki Naruto. They graduated from the academy last year."
Naruto and Sakura chirp hellos, but Sasuke just leans against Naruto and gives a lazy wave of his hand.
The kids are instantly captivated. They start peppering them with questions, about training and graduation and missions. Naruto and Sakura answer most of their questions, with Sasuke throwing quips in every now and then. The girls in his class seem to be equally captivated with both Sasuke and Sakura, for very different reasons, but all the boys are eagerly eating up Naruto's abridged story about their mission to Wave. Iruka lets it go on for a few minutes before he calls the class back to attention, to the boos and whining of many.
As he does he senses a presence at the window again, and when he looks up, he catches sight of Kakashi sitting on the sill, chin in his hand, watching the proceedings. Iruka allows himself a small smile at Kakashi's obvious attachment to his kids, but doesn't announce his presence.
"Alright, alright, settle down now. We're going over clones today. Would any of you three care to give a demonstration? I think they're tired of seeing the plain old version of it from me."
He says the words to the three of them but he looks right at Naruto, and the blond boy smiles and leaps forward.
"Sure! Just one clone?"
"As many as you can make without breaking my classroom." Iruka allows. According to Kakashi, Naruto's multi-shadow clone jutsu is something to see these days. Iruka is inordinately proud of him, since it was the plain illusion version of the same jutsu that had forced Iruka to fail Naruto the first time he'd applied to graduate.
The kids watch in awe as Naruto channels his chakra and Sasuke and Sakura step pointedly backwards. In a burst of smoke the room is full of a dozen Naruto look-alikes, perched on the ceiling and the walls and some of the desks. The original smirks as the kids look around in awe and immediately start jabbering at him, pestering him with more questions.
He's nearly attacked by a swarm of little fans when he sheepishly explains that it's only about a fifth of his normal clone capacity, and Sasuke is forced to snag Konohamaru by the back of his shirt when he starts trying to climb Naruto's arm.
The third's grandson glares hard at the Uchiha for separating him from his idol, and Sasuke glares right back, igniting a crackle of animosity.
Kakashi's laughter from the window turns the heads of all three Genin and by default the rest of the class, and Kakashi sways to his feet.
"Sorry Iruka-sensei. I hope they haven't disturbed your routine too much," He says blithely.
Iruka huffs. "What's a shinobi's life without a little of the unexpected?"
There's a peppering of more whispered questions from his class.
"Who's that?"
"Is that their sensei?"
"Like a real-life Jounin?"
Iruka hushes them again as Kakashi gets closer. "It's rude to whisper."
"We won, so can we do our summons training now?" Sakura asks.
"That was the deal, cub," Kakashi agrees. "But that's something best done outside your dear teacher's classroom, I think. Training ground 18 now. Off with you."
The three Genin take off with hardly a word of assent, and Iruka watches them go with an indulgent smile.
"Alright, class dismissed!" He calls. "Don't forget to practice your taijutsu for tomorrow's spar."
The kids scatter in a flurry of papers, dulled shuriken, and raw energy, leaving the room empty in moments.
"I can tell them to pick a new safe zone, if they're too disruptive," Kakashi assures him.
"I honestly don't mind," Iruka says easily, moving behind his desk to shuffle his papers together. "Besides, it's good to break up the monotony, keep the kids on their toes. Have you told them?"
Kakashi shuffles from his right foot to his left. "Told them what?"
"Don't play dumb with me Kakashi."
"But I'm so good at it." The Jounin jokes.
Iruka sighs. "The paperwork went through this morning, you know. The lands are officially open again."
"That doesn't mean it's ready to move into," Kakashi reasons. "It still needs to be cleaned and the rooms sorted out… and they still might not…"
"They could help you with that, you know. They would be glad to."
Kakashi looks doubtful.
Iruka puts a hand to his forehead, patience running thin. "Oh my god you're such a moron," he mutters under his breath. "Look, Hatake. Those three brats are some of the most stubborn, obstinate, and independent kids I've ever taught. They're opinionated, intelligent, curious, and pretty much impossible to control on a good day."
"Yes?" Kakashi says uncertainly. "What's your point?"
"Do you know why they listen to you?"
"They have to?" Kakashi guesses, and Iruka wants to take his glass paperweight to the side of his stupid head.
"They respect you, you moron."
"Well, ya, a little," Kakashi admits.
"No, not a little," Iruka counters. "They respect me, to some extent, because I taught them for years. You've only been their sensei a few months and they respect you more than anyone. Probably even the Hokage."
"That's ridiculous."
"No, it's terrifying." Iruka states, but then sighs. "Look I'm not going to give you a lecture. I just want you to know that you're freaked out about something you really shouldn't be worried about. Just tell them."
Kakashi shifts again and meets his eyes, but Iruka clearly hasn't gotten through his thick head just yet because the doubt in his eyes is still prevalent.
"I'll let them know that it's an… option. Soon." He hedges, backing up towards the window. "I should make sure they didn't break anything on their way across the village. See ya."
Iruka smirks to himself as the Jounin disappears out the window. He'd expected Kakashi's emotional stall, counted on it actually, but it had been worth a shot to try and talk some sense into him. Oh well. Genma should be done acquiring enough help by now; he should go check on his progress now that class is out.
Poor Kakashi. He thinks. He's not going to know what hit him.
"Oh my god, are our senseis dating?"
"I believe they are attempting to be subtle about it. Perhaps you should keep from screaming it from the hilltops."
"Come on you two, please don't start a fight."
Kiba casts Hinata an apologetic glance. "Sorry Hina. We'll behave, promise."
"I will endeavor to be… less antagonistic. Apologies," Shino adds.
"Seriously though," Kiba asks Shikamaru, who's nestled into the shade of a tree like he's about to melt into it. "How long has that been going on?"
"Two months, give or take a week," the Nara mutters, eyeballing the two Jounin on the other side of the small path, leaning just a hair too close together to be considered polite for company. Asuma has his arm braced high on the tree trunk he's leaning against and Kurenai has her shoulder propped just beneath it, her arms across over her chest and her hair tucked back. Definitely not platonic body language. "How much longer are we going to be sitting here? Because if it's much longer I'm going back to my nap." Shikamaru complains.
"Genma-san said he'd be back in twenty minutes. It's been sixteen," Choji informs him helpfully.
"I'm back you guys!" Ino calls, jogging up the rough-hewn path, ducking under hickory branches to keep from snagging her fine hair on any of the leaves. She has a takeaway bag tucked under her arm that she cradles close as she leaps up the steep incline.
The path is an overgrown one, so reclaimed by nature that it can hardly be considered a path at all, the shallow groove carved into the earth is overgrown and covered with mossy stones, shoots of new trees sprouting up along the edges. No one's walked this path in a long time. Decades at least.
Kiba takes a deep breath through his nose, cataloging all the scents. Cedarwood, undergrowth, a bit of the fog that found sanctuary from the fire country sun beneath the thick canopy of branches overhead. More potent are the smells of his friends so close by; Shino's clean and earthy smell, the scent of Hinata's jasmine shampoo, Choji's constant aura of fried food. As usual, Shikamaru smells of deer and sandalwood, and Ino's normally floral scent is overpowered by the smell of the barbecue she'd volunteered to go get for Choji, and the Akimichi stares at her like she's some kind of messiah.
"You're the best Ino," He babbles, making grabby hands at the food. Ino laughs and hands him a to-go box, then fishes out a folded paper bag.
"I brought some wontons, too, in case anyone else was hungry."
Nothing brings people together quite like food, and within a few seconds Ino has passed her goodies out into eager hands until she has only two of the crunchy snacks to her name. She then sits down and lies back against Shikamaru's legs, handing him a wonton before she begins to tear hers delicately into fourths. Kiba watches as Shikamaru tears his apart into fourths as well, and then starts to hand them one at a time back to Ino, keeping only one for himself and smiling a little when Ino happily scarfs them down.
Shiranui Genma treks up the path a few minutes later, laughing at their little camp, Iruka-sensei behind him.
"You ready to get this show in the road?" he asks the eight of them at large, finally drawing Asuma and Kurenai's eyes away from each other.
"I don't even know what we're doing," Kiba complains, feeding Akamaru the crunchy ends of his wontons.
"Lets consider it a mission for now," Iruka says, brushing leaf matter off his flak jacket. "Top secret. Are you six up to a little espionage?"
"A few more drills and we can call it a day, I think." Kakashi looks down at Pakkun, who is giving his three cubs his usual bored stare as they flit through the trees above their heads, flashes of fire and cuts of wind and water glinting off scales and fur and feathers. "How do you think they're doing so far?"
"Difficult to say this early." The pug admits. "They're still clumsy, but that's to be expected adding new factors like summons into combat dynamics. The summons suit them well, though, and they're already fostering respect for one another, so it's off to a healthy start."
"I agree. Sage summons are problematic to master, but not impossible, especially when you have the initial presence of mind to treat them as equals. Turns out I worried for nothing."
"Boss."
"Hmm?"
"Are pups supposed to be this strong this young?" He asks, watching as Sasuke's young Roc wrestles with Sakura's Zotl, and Naruto's fox summons wrestle with each other.
"It's not unprecedented." Kakashi reasons. He himself was a prodigy, and while the word could apply to his brats, he also feels like the truth is somewhat more complex.
"You sure? Because I'm not." Pakkun grumbles, and then suddenly cuts himself off to bark up at the kids. "Stop messing around up there! Next formation, come on now!" There's a slightly embarrassed laugh and a vaguely irritated huff, but then training is back in full swing.
"You're not just talking about strength or skill are you?" Kakashi guesses.
Pakkun huffs through his short nose. "That too." he admits. "But usually skill like this comes at a mental or social cost– isolation, mental health problems or ticks, personality issues, even god complexes if we look at some of the crazier ones. But other than being stubborn little shits and possibly some codependency issues, the pups are almost alarmingly healthy in that regard."
"And I'm glad for it." Kakashi say firmly. With the hurdles the three of them have been forced to overcome, he isn't surprised that they found that extra needed strength in each other. And if that stability comes at the cost of them being a little too dependent on each other, then Kakashi has no problem with it. He has a feeling they'll grow out of it with a little nudging, and even if they don't, there are worse weaknesses to have.
Their conversation is interrupted when Naruto's summons dissolve into a fight again, Kuran-kha and Renge-kai if he remembers their names correctly.
"And we've lost them again." Pakkun grumbles. Kakashi just laughs.
"Alright alright. How about a lunch break?" Kakashi calls.
"Can we shower first?" Sasuke complains, alighting on an oak branch and eyeing the bluish toxin on his clothes with distaste. "Ravia spat venom everywhere."
Ravia flutters from Sakura's shoulders. "You are lucky I did not aim for your eyes."
"I'll meet you three at Ichiraku in an hour then." He agrees.
"Come on you two, break it up." Naruto grumbles, prying Kuran and Renge off each other by their scruffs.
"He started it!" Renge snarls, diving into Naruto's arms for shelter. After a few hours of training the little fox had finally decided that Naruto wasn't half bad and had grown rapidly attached. He seems a bit pampered for a summons, in Kakashi's opinion, and he tends to tuck himself into Naruto shirt or the crooks of his limbs when he's upset.
The dark-furred Kuran leaps into his favorite spot curled around Naruto's shoulders. "Liar." He counters, but calms down when Naruto gives him a scratch behind the ear.
"Give it a rest will ya?" Naruto grumbles at them both, and they grudgingly settle back down.
"That was very bracing." Kikri chirps. "I quite enjoyed it."
Kakashi grins behind the safety of his mask and Icha Icha when they part ways on the street outside the training ground, watching as a couple of Chunin stall on the sidewalk across from them to gawk at the three Genin and their summons.
He gives the memorial stone a quick visit on his way home, talks with Obito's memory for a while about the cubs and their progress.
"You've turned into such a sap." he can imagine Obito telling him. "What happened to that aloof little asshole I knew?"
He died when you did. Kakashi thinks sadly. I won't make the same mistake I made with you. I will never again take something I love for granted.
He wonders what Obito might think of him now, a Jounin-sensei, guiding his own brats through the motions of shinobi life the way Minato had guided them. He likes to imagine that Minato-sensei would be proud of him, that Kushina would ruffle his hair too hard like she had when he was young, when she was still alive.
He wonders if they would forgive him for leaving Naruto alone for as long as he did, Hokage's orders or no.
He's not sure, but he's still a long way from forgiving himself.
He's practically at his doorstep when he senses Sasuke, Naruto, and Sakura leap over the rooftop behind him at full speed, and when he turns he sees they're still in their old clothes.
"What's the matter? Did something happen?" he asks when they land out of breath on his porch.
"All our stuff is gone!" Sakura declares wrathfully.
"We've been freaking robbed!" Naruto affirms. "Someone took all our things out of the apartment, my Uzushio scrolls were in my bag!"
"What?" Kakashi growls, wondering who could be stupid enough to steal from his cubs, and then feels a sudden sense of foreboding and turns to his own apartment. He disarms his chakra alarms and opens the door.
Sure enough, even from the entryway Kakashi can see that all his things are gone. The pack is missing, even Pakkun, who'd been dismissed a mere half-hour ago. His weapons are gone from the shelves in the living room, his dresser drawers are open and empty of their contents, and Mr. Uki is missing from his place on the windowsill. He suddenly knows exactly what's happened.
"Goddammit Iruka." he mutters.
"Sensei? What's going on?" Sakura asks, leaning sideways to peer past him into the apartment. "Is there a serial burglar around?"
A burglar wouldn't know the key sequence to the traps in my flat.
"No." he answers. "Just a sneaky academy teacher." he closes his apartment door with a fatalistic smack. "Come on, you three. I think I know where your things are."
The path Kakashi-sensei leads them to runs up through the hills deep into the woods at the edge of the village proper, a steep overgrown incline that looks like it hasn't seen foot traffic in years. In their panicked rush, the three of them had yet to actually dismiss their summons, so Renge-kai is still tucked into Naruto's arm, and Kuran-kha remains draped over his shoulders.
Renge pokes his head up from where it had been tucked into Naruto's elbow, giving the air a cautious sniff. "This place smells like wolves."
Kuran nods, tipping his head to glance up at his summoner. "Are you sure it's okay for us to be here? This whole place screams direwolf territory, even if I can't sense any around."
"Kakashi-sensei wouldn't lead us somewhere dangerous without telling us." Naruto assures them.
Kikri looks around from her perch on Sasuke's shoulder, hopping sideways so that she's teetering almost on the edge of his bicep. "This is exciting. Is this the way the thieves went?
"More like pranksters, probably." Sasuke reasons. "But yes."
Ravia hisses. "Pranksters or not, that was incredibly rude."
"I'm sure it was harmless fun." Sakura soothes.
"Sorry about this cubs." Kakashi says as they reach the end of the incline. "Here we are."
As they exit the forest the trees part around a field of thick grass, tall enough to brush Naruto's knees. It's split here and there with tall rocks before it gives way to a set of sprawling buildings, old and overgrown with vines and other greenery. They're beautifully crafted underneath their cloak of plant life, old traditional architecture with carved doorways guarded by statues of wolves.
"Where are we?" Sasuke asks.
"These are my old clan lands." Kakashi explains, and in his tone Naruto can sense a trace of sadness followed by the bitter earth-and-rust smell of old pain. "They haven't been in use for a long time, since I don't need the space."
"This whole place is yours?" Sakura marvels, taking in the rolling space and the painstakingly crafted buildings. "Is that a dojo?"
"You have a clan?" Sasuke asks softly.
Kakashi turns to look at him and smiles with his eyes. "'Had' would probably be a better word, but yes. My clan declined heavily during the shinobi world wars though, so it's just me now."
Sasuke doesn't say anything in response, but Naruto knows him well enough to see that his view of their sensei his changed.
"Why would someone take our stuff here?" Naruto wonders.
Kakashi grimaces strongly enough that it's visible a little underneath the mask. "I, uh, had this place reopened recently. Just in case of emergencies, or if you three needed more room, I suppose."
And that's stress and a little bit of embarrassment that Naruto can sense coming off him in waves, and is Kakashi saying what Naruto thinks he's saying?
"ABOUT TIME HATAKE."
Kakashi turns his gaze to narrow his eyes across the green at the purple haired kunoichi stalking towards them from the main house. "Anko? What are you doing here? And why are you wearing an apron?"
The kunoichi in question is in fact wearing a short black apron covered in grey and white smudges, her hair tied back with a black bandanna.
"What the hell does it look like? Spring cleaning, jackass. You really let this whole place go to hell, you know. You better be grateful Iruka knows you better than you know yourself."
"I- what?" Kakashi says, confused.
"Whatever." Anko dismisses. Hurry up then. We're almost done."
When Kakashi ducks into his old childhood home, he almost trips and smacks his head on the doorframe when he comes face to face with Genma in a bright fuchsia apron decorated with yellow sunflower patterns.
"What?" Genma grumbles, flicking his senbon crossly. "It was my mom's."
"I didn't say a word." Kakashi defends, holding up his hands in placation once he has his balance back.
He pauses again once he gets a look at the main room past Genma's eye searing cleaning-wear, and finds he hardly recognizes the place. It's been stripped of all the old furniture but for a few of the fur rugs he remembers, which have been rolled up and set in the corner. Everything has been scrubbed down to a spotless shine, even the dusty old carvings over the doorways and the corners. All the traditional elements of the house have been left where they are, the statues and the wall scrolls, but all the personal elements of the house that Kakashi had been afraid of tripping over emotionally have been either discarded or moved somewhere else.
"I put a lot of things in storage." Iruka says as he comes around the corner from an adjacent room, as if reading his mind. "You should have listened to me Kakashi. If you'd have told your kids about this in the beginning I wouldn't have had to take such drastic action."
Kakashi groans and leans against the doorframe dramatically. "Was this really necessary?"
"Yes." Genma snaps at him.
His kids had been accosted at the gates by Kurenai's Genin and the Ino-Shika-Cho trio, where Kiba and Shikamaru admitted to breaking into the apartment and grabbing their things with the help of Shino and Choji, and Ino and Hinata told Sakura they'd gotten even more of her things from her house, including a snow globe that nearly got Ino bowled over for how happy Sakura was to see it.
"Gai was here earlier, but he said he had to get back to his students. You actually just missed him." Genma informs him.
"Thank god." Kakashi mutters. "I mean, too bad." He says louder, but Genma is already laughing at him.
"Sensei!" he hears Sakura call, and he turns without thinking as she appears around the corner. "Yes, cub?"
He regrets the word almost as soon as it leaves his mouth then he sees Genma still in the corner of his vision, a hand coming up over his mouth.
"Which room is ours?"
Kakashi's brain stalls at that, puttering out until he manages a quick reboot. "What?"
"Was that offer to stay not serious, sensei?" Sasuke asks, appearing over Sakura's shoulder.
"It was." Kakashi manages, still bewildered and blinking.
"Okay, because Naruto is wondering if the big room on the far end is yours."
Kakashi's brain abruptly stalls again, memories of his father's blood painting the floor of that room, silvery in the light shining through the shoji doors– he shakes his head to clear away the memory. "No. If you three are staying in the same room, then it's best you have that one, I think."
Sakura makes a shout of triumph and Sasuke disappears down the hall quick as a flash, already shouting at Naruto to set up their things.
"Told you." Iruka says easily, and then Genma bursts into laughter.
"Oh my god." he gushes. "The great Hatake Kakashi, the feared Copy-nin, is a parent."
"Please shut up." Kakashi groans, but doesn't contradict him.