Cover source: pixiv 60860510
AN (2. Nov. 21.): Right of the bat, I have no idea how seriously I will take this thing. All that I can say is that I'll be having fun with it and do whatever comes to my mind, respectfully throwing continuity out of the window if it gets in my way, quality be damned. So, see this thing as the result of some idiot having fun with words, and apologies if I happen to offend you with it.
If you still want to read whatever bunch of words I'll be writing in a short moment, be my guest, make yourself comfortable, and I hope you will be entertained.
Kisses!
Catharsis
The process of releasing, and thereby providing relief from, strong or repressed emotions.
Let us strive for this very moment.
"Well, I'm going in now."
Emilia had firmed her resolve, and entered the tomb.
It was finally time to face the last Trial of the Sanctuary.
Just moments ago, she had cleared the second Trial, swearing to big brother Arch that she would now be the one helping others, and also thanking Echidna for showing her that beautiful, but unthinkable present.
The Witch's reply, of course, was none other than...
'You... You disgust me. I just... hate you so much.' whilst appearing shaken to her core.
Emilia did not understand why Echidna would feel this way, and what she could have possibly done to Echidna to treat her with such abhorrence.
It was most likely her existence itself, but Emilia could not change that fact.
With the Witch's venomous parting words, the second Trial had ended, eradicating that false reality, and showing Emilia, for the first time in a long time, her visage in the water's reflection.
Which was a lot more boring than she thought, mainly because it did not look like Mother Fortuna's.
"Take care!" Breaking her thoughts, the inhabitants of the Sanctuary were rooting for her success, to free them from the Sanctuary, to let them choose their own futures.
Yes, she would bring them that future. This would be her first act of unfettered dependability.
No longer would she be helpless, selfishly and shamelessly seeking help at every opportunity, burdening the people around her. No, this time, she would be the one to help.
The encouraging words were getting quieter and quieter as Emilia went deeper, until they were inaudible.
She had reached the chamber of the Trials.
One last time, she had to confront an aspect of her.
Confronting her past, an unthinkable present, and now a future that was not known to anyone.
She would pass this Trial, and prove to everyone that she can help too.
'I'm ready.'
With that, the voice announcing her Trial entered her mind.
What, you expected to face something revolving around you? Pssh, not on my watch. Prepare to understand the person named Natsuki fucking Barusu from the beginning till a point I determine to be satisfactory~!
...
"Huh?"
Unable to comprehend what in the world was just spoken to her in a weird voice, unconsciousness took her yet again, starting the last Trial.
What she was going to face, what she was going to experience... Depending on how one looks at it, some would envy her, while others would not even dare to.
The darkness that had enveloped her being, a feeling she could never grow used to, slowly began to dissipate, replacing her non-existent senses with real ones.
The first sense that registered was sight, as it banished the darkness with a harsh bright light, making Emilia flinch and close her eyes.
The rest of her senses had fully recovered, but before Emilia could reopen her eyes, she heard a voice.
"Yup, it's a boy."
With those appraising words from another unknown voice, the wailing of a newborn child could be heard.
"Where am I?" Emilia's eyes adjusted to the bright light, and observed her surroundings.
It was a room of white, everything was white. The ceiling was white, the walls were white, and even the floor was white. The room was lit by strange tubes on its ceiling which exuded light. A kind of crystal lamp, she presumed, but odd looking. At the far right, there was a set of windows that led to an unknown landscape that she had never seen before. However, it was nighttime, wherever she was. Though, she could see that there were many strange buildings and lights outside.
When she finally looked at the source of the voice and the wailing, Emilia saw several people surrounding a strange type of bed. A woman with eyes that reminded her of Subaru was lying in the bed, panting from apparent exhaustion. Next to her sat a man with hair that reminded her of Subaru, watching with concern and relief at the same time. With them were two other individuals, wearing strange white clothing. Uniforms, perhaps?
But what interested Emilia the most was the new life that had just been born into this world.
Hesitantly, Emilia approached the group of people, unsure if they could see her or not. When she stood next to the bed, nobody reacted to her standing in the way, not acknowledging her at all.
"Nobody can see me, is it?" she muttered gently, unsure how she should feel about this.
"Echidna is not here too, is she?" Emilia looked around her, but she could not find the Witch of Greed anywhere in this room.
"She did say she hates me... Maybe she had enough of me?" Emilia mused. While Echidna hated her guts, Emilia couldn't say she did.
A one-sided hateful relationship.
She did regret it, but as far as she could see, there was not much she could do to change that fact for now.
Having made peace with that piece of knowledge, Emilia looked at the newly birthed life in the arms of his mother. A boy, was it?
As expected, the wailing came from a little newborn child, still tinted red from its recent entrance into the world, with an already pronounced layer of black hair settling on his head.
However, Emilia wouldn't call this little baby necessarily 'cute', per se, as it was still too 'fresh' and scrunched up. But, she could still see this baby as an endearing little thing, and it easily awakened many protective instincts in her. She especially liked the eyes this baby inherited from his mother.
They looked just like Subaru's.
"Are you okay, Naoko?" The black-haired man asked the mother, who had ceased to pant and started to cuddle with her child.
"Yes... I'm just fine, Kenichi. But look, this is our child... This is our son..." The woman, Naoko, dismissed the man's, Kenichi's, worry, and instead decided to rightfully fawn over their crying newborn son.
So this man is this child's father.
"Yes, that's right! That's our beloved son!" Kenichi happily agreed, smiling brightly. "I almost can't believe it. But look, he has your beautiful eyes~"
"And he has your silky hair~"
The couple fawned over each other, and over their son.
Seeing so, Emilia couldn't help but smile happily as well.
What a beautiful picture of a new family, she thought.
"But..." Emilia questioned. "Why am I here?"
She tried to remember the last words that were spoken to her, the words that announced the last Trial...
Prepare to understand the person named Natsuki fucking Barusu
Ignoring how weird that statement sounded, Emilia understood that this Trial had to be about Subaru.
"What is his name going to be?" Naoko asked with a wink, cuddling her now calmer son closer to her chest.
"I think we both know of the perfect name." Kenichi answered with a wink as well, causing her to giggle gently.
"Okay then. Three, two, one..."
"Subaru!" both parents cried out in unison, readily prepared.
Subaru.
Emilia's eyes widened.
She looked at the child, more intently than ever before.
She could see it now. The eyes, the hair, the nose, the mouth, the face.
It was Subaru.
That little baby was Subaru.
The selfless boy who had saved her life in the loothouse just to know her name. The heroic boy that had saved Arlam Village's children from the Mabeasts. The funny and energetic boy that became her very first friend. The stupid boy that just could not keep his nose from others businesses. The self-sacrificial boy that once again saved everyone she knew by the unknown assailants and threw himself into mortal danger. The indulgent boy that forgave her selfishness. The harsh boy that chose to believe in her.
The boy who chose to love her.
All of that, all of that amazingness, all of that dunderheadness...
...began right here, at this place, at this time...
...bundled in this adorable little package that was a newborn baby.
"Subaru..." Emilia whispered at the little thing, amazed, and surprised, affectionate.
After a moment, her face relaxed, and she giggled softly.
"So this is your birth... and those are your parents... I see. I understand now."
While the realization hit home, the parents continued to fawn over their child.
"Subaru..." Kenichi cooed.
"Mommy and daddy love you..." Naoko cooed as well.
Emilia could only watch, and admire the sight before her, ingraining it into the depths of her soul.
What a beautiful and peaceful birth. And the parents seemed to very kind people too.
She bowed to the parents, and spoke the words that her heart desired most to say, at this moment, at this time.
"Thank you for bringing Subaru into this world. Thank you so much."
Her words went unnoticed, as the pair of mother and father continued to lovingly coo to their adorable son, but Emilia did not mind.
Emilia gently brought her hand to Subaru's cheek. Her fingers could not touch him, but she felt at ease, cupping and caressing his tiny cheek, smiling matronly at him.
"Your sleeping face never changed, did it?" A slight chuckle escaped her. "Since your birth, you never changed."
She would always cherish that expression, that peaceful expression of his, when his fierce eyes soften into mellow orbs, free of worry, whether asleep or awake.
And she would always be grateful to the parents that made it possible for him to have that expression.
Always.
Echidna was observing the accursed whore's current situation from her comfy tea party within her castle of dreams, surprised to say the least.
Originally, she wanted to have nothing to do with the third Trial, shall the whore do whatever she pleases.
But this... As much as she wanted to, she could not ignore such a thing.
Instead of confronting her possible futures, the whore is confronting Natsuki Subaru's past?
"Now, this is quite fascinating." Echidna muttered with a slightly perplexed expression, to say the least.
She was sure everything should be working just fine. It did with prior Trials, after all. Then why was the carefully constructed third Trial failing its intended purpose? It was operating in an entirely nonsensical way, not only bringing Emilia into an environment not meant for her, it was also presenting her the memories of an entirely different person. Additionally, the far-past memories of Natsuki Subaru, the memories he shouldn't have in the first place due to being a newborn, appear to be correctly reconstructed as well. It was nothing new with infants, Garfiel's past was correctly reconstructed as well. But Garfiel was an inhabitant of this world, the Trial could resort to the World's memories for the reconstruction. But Natsuki Subaru was from a different world, making that mechanism impossible to use. This was quite interesting.
The Trial was constructing the past of Natsuki Subaru utterly perfectly, it would seem. Better than she would ever have thought possible.
How?
"How is this possible? This was not supposed to happen..." Her greed for knowledge was growing at an alarming rate.
She wanted to know. This was a variable completely unknown to her. Anything that was unexpected, she needed to learn from it.
She wanted to know.
Right you are, Dona~!
A merry voice materialized within her realm, bringing Echidna's turning gears to a temporary halt. Without an instant of hesitance, she looked towards the source of this intruding voice, curious as to what could have entered her castle of dreams without permission.
What her sight greeted was... strange.
It was nothing inhuman, nor extraordinary in any case whatsoever. It was the definition of what you would call a humanoid person, an average human, if you will. It was not even worth describing in her mind.
However, when she looked at it, she couldn't help herself but call it strange. Its nature was completely foreign to her, she could not even grasp from its odd, yet ordinary appearance whether it was sapient, or even sentient for that matter. But given it is most likely the source of the earlier comment of agreement, she mused it must be an entity of civil sapience, capable of human thought, conversation and reason.
How illogical. How peculiar.
Was this how others felt when gazing upon a witch such as herself?
An incomprehensible entity?
Fascinating.
Is this entity behind the malfunction of the Trial? Why is it here? Why did it agree with her? Why did it call her Dona? Is it hostile? Is it passive? What is it capable of? What is it not capable of? Does it sleep? Does it eat? Can it use magic? Does it possess a divine protection? Does it possess emotions? Does it act on instinctual impulses, or composed thoughts?
Dissecting a completely newfound species of being within her mind, Echidna looked at the entity with profound interest.
She needed to know more, so much more.
And to understand more...
"Who might you be, stranger? I do not remember inviting you to my tea party." Echidna, the Witch of Greed, the one who wants to learn and know of everything, asked with all her heart, trying to comprehend this strange entity by opening a diplomatic discourse with it.
The entity appeared to be smiling in return, and approached her with a jovial stride.
"Now, now. Let's not get ahead of ourselves, ight? When demanding one's identity, one has to state theirs first, eh? It's my right, after all. Godimsofuckingfunny." the entity answered with a displaced snicker.
"...Apologies, you are correct. My name is Echidna, though I am known as the Witch of Greed."
"Yeah, I know."
Echidna decided to ignore the rude comment.
"I see. With that out of the way, might I hear your name?"
"I'm parched, do you have something I could drink?" It ignored her request, still smiling.
"Ahem," She coughed gently. What a weird thing she stumbled upon. "I do. Would you care for some freshly brewed tea?" With the teapot in her hands, she politely invited the entity for tea.
"Sure~!" it practically chirped with newfound enthusiasm.
With that, the strange entity sat down to the opposite of her, right where Subaru had sat down when she wanted to form a contract with him.
Not that there were many other places to sit in this tea party for two.
'This entity does not hesitate before me, nor does it seem affected by my nature, just like him... What are you?'
"I'm here to discuss some things with you, Dona." it said while Echidna was pouring some tea into its cup, also putting a small tray with cookies next to it.
"Yes, I thought that might the case."
As she said so, the entity drank from the teacup.
"Mmmhmm! That's some gourmet shit right 'ere, ~tsu!"
Echidna smiled wryly in return. "What if I told you this tea solely contains my bodily fluids?"
Knowing from previous encounters, the reaction was predetermined.
"Nice."
Or not.
Without delay, the entity continued to drink the tea, uncaring, no, more eager after Echidna's comment.
Now this, this is what people would call a degenerate.
Even Echidna understood this fact.
'So that's how a so-called degenerate acts. Interesting.' she thought with innocent inquisitiveness.
With one more aspect of life learned, Echidna wanted to learn more
"Now that you have drunk some of my tea, it would be most polite of you to tell me your name. I am most interested in knowing the identity of my conversational partner."
The entity placed the cup down, and looked downwards, its smile fading somewhat.
"I go by many names..." it muttered quietly, its voice having turned much darker. As if punctuating its words, clouds, too, were darkening the area around them.
"'Tasteless Shithead', 'Menace of Worlds', 'Annoying Piece of Garbage', 'Ask Someone Else To Give You A Nickname', 'Warden'..." It listed off its exalted titles.
"...but you may call me..."
It looked back to her, smiling menacingly.
...
"Kevin."
...
After stating its name, Kevin's demeanor went back to normal, as did the clouds.
Echidna blinked once at the display.
"Kevin, is it?" Echidna repeated.
"Yes, Kevin." he(?) affirmed.
"Kevin."
"That's me."
"Thank you for elaborating."
"You're welcome."
"Now, Kevin, I've been very curious since you've showed up uninvited to my tea party. Are you the one behind the malfunction of the last Trial?"
"Yes, though I wouldn't say it is malfunctioning. It is under new... management. Mine, to be clear." he(!) stated, treating his words like they're a matter of fact.
Hearing so, Echidna sighed gently.
"I figured so. However, I do question: why?"
"Secret~" he said, cheekily, as if wanting to tease her.
"Pardon me?" and it worked.
"Secret~"
"...So, you have your reasons for meddling with my precious Trial, which is: turning it into your toy for your own amusement." Echidna translated his hard-to-get answer.
"Oh wow, you figured it out." She figured it out. "I'm doing this for the lolz, and because I need a breather from work."
What a strange entity, she must say. Though, strange and unpredictable entities were the most fascinating of them all.
"I do not know what 'for the lolz' means, but I presume it means for your own amusement."
"Correct~!"
A new idiom for her personal dictionary.
If she would see Subaru again in the future, she would surely ask him for verification. As Subaru was a fellow weird being, he could surely attest.
"Although your existence is quite interesting, my maidenly heart is being hurt, you know? After all this work, after centuries of waiting for interesting people to enter my trials, you change their contents to your whim."
"Yup, sorry not sorry." he said, not apologetic at all. Quite antagonistic, actually.
"...If you hadn't said that last part, I might have forgiven you because of your strange nature."
"I know." Kevin's grin was wide and proud.
"And your answers to my comments are very succinct."
"Yea."
At least add the h you slothful-
"...At the very least... could you elaborate on your goals and have a chat with me while the Trial of that whore is proceeding?" Echidna poured him another cup of tea.
"Pssh, you don't have to hide your fear of her by acting all hostile to her, Dona!" Kevin chuckled lightheartedly, making her frown. "But yeah, I can do that for a lil' bit. I did say I would discuss things with ya. Besides, my purpose has been fulfilled, so I have not much to do for now. But, the Trial will go on for quite a while, you know."
"What do you mean, specifically?" Trials take hours, at the very best. What does 'a while' mean?
"Well, dear Emilia has been transported way back into Subaru's past, yeah?"
"Yes, so it would seem. I still wonder what the point of something like that could be, other than 'amusement'."
"You see, she will experience Subaru's past, present, and possible futures. Catch is, there is no timeskip for her."
"..."
Does that mean what she thinks this means?
"Yup." He perfectly answered her mute question, all too clear to see on her face.
"At least... 18 or so years?" she prodded the time this Trial could potentially take.
"You got it." Kevin snapped with his fingers, finger-gunning her. "And since this is all wibbly wobbly dreamy wimey stuff, time will go much faster in the Trial. It will probably take an hour or so in the eyes of the outside world. Buuuut~, since you're in this dream realm, who knows how time works here, riiight~?"
Which means that Echidna has to potentially wait 18 years for time to continue normally for her, and to end the Trial for good.
Because of this Kevin's interference, his prank, or whatever, Echidna has to spent 18 additional years in her castle of dreams, without being able to advance the outside world's time.
18 years was nothing compared to the time she had already spent here, but...
"Is this one of those times, where I should be angry?" she asked gingerly, honestly curious.
If this continues, she might be able to learn a new emotion.
"You tell me." was his most helpful answer.
"This is not very helpful." which was apparently not very helpful.
"Does it incite you?"
"Should it?"
"It would be a start to being angry, I guess."
Good to know.
Over the past few days, she was learning quite a lot. How exciting.
"...I think my thirst for curiosity has just tremendously risen. Your existence, your crass attitude, much like Natsuki Subaru's, is a complete mystery to me. While his potential is inexhaustible, I cannot even begin to understand yours."
"I knew it! People like the mysterious guys! I knew it! Take that, Derek!"
What a profound mind she has encountered.
"Whether or not I have to wait an additional 18 years does not matter to me. The whore is trapped in a prison, and will potentially lose her mind due to the isolation, which is a welcome prospect in my eyes. Additionally, I can look at Natsuki Subaru's existence as well. And while that is happening, I get to talk to you. You will not vanish right now, right? You will talk with me, right? You have made me curious, so curious. Natsuki Subaru is not here to quench that thirst, so you have to take responsibility. Do you understand the desire of this maidenly heart?"
Being faced with the passion for knowledge of the Witch of Greed, Kevin completely understood that maidenly heart of hers. Which is why he said, with all his sincerity...
"Nope!"
While he may not really understand her maidenly heart, he's got the spirit.
Readying himself against Echidna's potential onslaught of questions, Kevin smirked without much care. And instead of being the one being questioned for once, Echidna's smile widened, reminding any onlooker of her true nature.
And the first question she was going to ask was...
"Tell me, what are you?"
[Where It All Started]
AN (18. Dec. 21.): And that's the end of the teaser.
Yeah, so... I've had this haze of an idea for a few years now, decided to have some fun with it, and this is the first result which I am sharing for the ones who are interested.
How will things go from here? To be precise, no idea. Generally:
1. Emilia learns of everything from Subaru's perspective, the past (Earth), present (Lugunica), and future (Future Arcs and IFs, but only snippets of the IFs in her mind. Goodness forbid am I ever gonna put Emilia through Greed IF in real time). Still, how detailed will I write this stuff, you ask? Also no idea! I could write all the events in detail, or only take the most important events, or I could summarize all of Re:Zero in just one small chapter. I don't want to work 18 years on this, and there are WHDAAA and company to scratch that particular itch now, but I'll see how I get my fun out of this, sweet and horrible times included. And how will all of this madness change Emilia? Let's see, shall we?
2. Emilia finishes the Trial. What happens afterward? Why, but of course the sole point of this fic: the confrontation with Subaru, with a changed Emilia. That's why I am writing this. What happens afterward? Well, this won't turn into a 'Forced to Listen' nightmare, let me tell you. So... Hopefully fluff times, covered with happiness and sprinkled with joy?
I just want some genuine and definitive fluff for my boy Subaru, lads. Been thinking of that since the end of Season 1 (2016). It has been quietly nagging at me for five years.
But, ambitious as this endeavor is, that all lies under the assumption that I'll even continue this, heh. Though, I am sitting on 35k words right now (less than I'd like), and because I am not writing on this chronologically, it's completely useless for release. Also, it's not like I have a different bunch of words I could be worrying about (not abandoned I swear™, just creative block).
And for those wondering why I chose Arc 4 and not Arc 6 for this work to take place in, I thought the lull after Arc 4 would be a good fluff opportunity.
As for an upload schedule, there is none of course. No guarantees, no promises. I'll only upload when I have something to upload. I may upload next week, month, or year. Who's to say. I may vanish for years this instant, or reappear precisely when I mean to.
Now, let me know what you think of this bizarre fic of mine.
With all that out of the way, let's move on to my obligatory sign-off catchphrase!
/Over and out/