Notes: Dean raising a teenage Sam with Cas's help. Reviews are warmly welcomed. If anyone enjoys this chapter enough to want more, please give me a shout.
Disclaimer: I own nothing expect my own obsession with Supernatural
Trigger Warnings: Mention of past child abuse. Grieving the loss of a parent. Consensual spanking of an adult during sex. Ten year age difference between Dean and Cas.
It's not that Dean isn't grateful for the way everything is working out. He is. For everything Cas has done for him and for Sam. For getting to keep Sam with him after their father died. Dean knows that Cas is the key to all of it. That there's no way Dean could make any of this work on his own. That no social worker in her right mind would have given custody of Sam to a 21-year high school dropout who worked two menial jobs and still struggled to make rent and keep a growing 15 year-old fed and clothed. But Cas had stepped in, with his ten years on Dean, his crisp dress shirts and ties, his solidly middle class income, and his impressive record of community service. Cas gave Dean respectability. Cas had moved Dean and Sam into his house when Dean couldn't afford the rent on their own apartment without his father's income. Cas had attended what felt like countless meetings with social workers and the dependency court hearing with Dean to help him get custody of Sam. And in those first dark days of grief, when the loss had made it difficult to breathe, and Dean had barely been able to keep it together for Sam, Cas had waited up in bed for Dean, every night, so that he could hold Dean while he cried himself to sleep, after Dean had done the same for Sam in the room down the hall. Dean is grateful for all of it. He just hadn't counted on all the tension between his two favorite people. And, he doesn't know what to do to make it better.
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"So, I can go, right?" Sam asks, his voice all teenage impatience and irritation, his eyes laser focused on Dean, a direct message to Cas that this question is for his brother alone.
Dean can feel Cas watching him, waiting to see if Dean is able to actually hold Sam accountable for his behavior and deny him something he wants. Dean considers taking another bite of his dinner, just to buy himself time, but worries that Cas might answer for him, and if he does, wouldn't that just set off a shitstorm with Sam. Dean sighs.
"I don't think so, Sam. You haven't really been holding up your end of the bargain lately." Dean watches Sam's eyes narrow with annoyance and he almost loses his nerve. "I had to be on you all week to get you to do any of your chores. And, your attitude has really sucked lately. Even after we talked about it last week and you said you'd be better." He almost adds 'to Cas' but catches himself in time, not wanting to get into all of that at the moment. Dean glances toward Cas then, at his spot at the head of the table, his careful expression giving Dean none of the encouragement he had expected to find. Dean turns back to Sam. "Do you honestly think you deserve to go on this camping trip?"
"Yes, I do. It's a school trip, Dean. That's like asking me if I deserve to go to history class." Sam says, the disgust clear in his tone.
Dean tries to remain neutral, to be an adult and not rise to the bait of Sam's hostile tone. "I know it's a school trip. But, it's also something fun. And it's optional. You said so yourself. And, we don't exactly ask a lot from you Sam. Just to clean up after yourself, and do your chores without making us hassle you about them. And to talk to us without a ton of attitude. And, it feels like you can't be bothered to do either lately."
Sam rolls his eyes. "Fine. I'll be better about my chores. And my attitude. But, that has nothing to do with this. This trip is part of my education, Dean. Just because you didn't care about your own education enough to graduate high school doesn't mean you have to wreck mine!"
"Hey, take it easy, Sammy." Dean regrets saying it almost immediately, recognizing that telling a worked up teenager to calm down typically has the opposite effect.
"No! This is bullshit!" Sam slams his fork down onto his plate.
"Samuel." Cas is leaning forward, his gravelly voice taking on the firm, authoritative quality that always goes straight to Dean's lower belly, simultaneously turning him on and giving him butterflies like a little kid who's about to be chastised. "That kind of language will not be tolerated in this house. Your brother is showing you the respect of having a civilized conversation with you. You will show him the same. Apologize. Now."
Sam won't look at either of them, his eyes trained on the half empty plate in front of him.
"It's ok, Cas." Dean starts to defend his brother, trying to make peace. "Sammy was just-" Cas gives Dean a stern look and he shuts his mouth without finishing his sentence.
Cas turns back to Sam. "We're waiting, Samuel." Dean knows that the whole 'Samuel' thing Cas does when Sam's in trouble drives his brother crazy. Even their dad hadn't done that. But, Cas is different from their dad in so many ways. He never yells, or hits, or threatens. He never even raises his voice. Dean has never seen his boyfriend out of control, not even for a moment. Cas is soft-spoken, but he isn't a pushover. He gets results through sheer force of will, and Dean has wanted to please him and make him proud since the first time they met. But, Dean still can't squelch the uneasiness that rises up in him when Cas and Sam are at odds like this. The feeling of apprehension that reminds him that he is still on guard for the type of sudden violence that had occasionally punctuated Sam's fights with their father, a slap or push for Sam when he wouldn't back down, or a backhand for Dean when he tried to intervene. Those things had only happened when their dad had been drinking, and only occurred a handful or so times, all within Sam's teenage years, but that had been enough for them to imprint themselves on Dean's expectations of family dynamics.
Sam looks up at Cas. "Fine. Sorry." The words are bitten off with defiance and Sam doesn't sound sorry at all, but Dean hopes Cas lets it go anyway. "Can I just go to my room now?"
This is something they never did with their dad, ask permission to leave the table. It was something Dean had previously associated with reruns of old sitcoms. He hadn't known that any families did that in real life until Cas had insisted on it with Sam after they moved in. Dinners in Dean's family had mostly consisted of eating takeout or microwave pizza in front of the television, with their dad missing as often as he was there. But, Cas had grown up in a very strict religious household where old fashioned manners had been the norm. Cas doesn't try to carry all the elements of his childhood forward. Cas's family had been true believers in the spare the rod spoil the child mentality of childrearing and Cas has shared stories with Dean that had made him sick to his stomach. But, respect is huge to Cas, and Dean doesn't really feel like he can argue with that. And, Dean loves having family dinners every night, eating a meal that has been prepared with care, and getting to listen to the people he loves talk about how their days went.
"May I please be excused?" Cas corrects.
"Sure, Cas. You're excused." Sam gives Cas a smug smirk, clearly proud of himself.
Dean feels like he should be saying something, but he isn't sure what he can say without looking like he's undermining Cas or not supporting Sam, and he doesn't want to choose a side.
Cas sighs softly. "That's very witty, Samuel, but it's inappropriate right now."
Dean watches Sam's smile falter into self-conscious uncertainty and he thinks about how different he and his brother are. Dean knows if he had had someone like Cas in his life at Sam's age, someone who had made it a priority to instill discipline in him and keep the chaos of his childhood at bay, Dean would have been putty in the man's hands.
"Dean worked hard to make this lovely meal for us." Cas says, his tone gentler, reasonable. "And I would really like for us to enjoy this meal together as a family and for you to finish what's on your plate before you're excused."
"This isn't a family." Sam mutters the statement toward his plate, the words barely audible, the hostility clear.
"Sam!" Dean scolds angrily. "Hey, c'mon!"
Cas is still staring at Sam, his expression softening slightly. "You are correct, Sam, that we are not a family in the traditional sense. You and I are not related by blood or marriage. But, I consider Dean my family because I love him with all my heart, and I extend my sense of family to include you because Dean loves you with all of his, and it would be impossible for me to not feel strong attachment and affection toward someone who is so important to Dean. I sincerely hope that someday you will think of me as a part of your family as well, Sam, but until that time comes, I will refrain from using that word to describe our relationship if it upsets you. Regardless of how you feel about me, I would still like us to sit and enjoy our dinner together while you live in this house."
Dean watches Sam process the change in Cas's tone, the use of 'Sam' instead of 'Samuel'. The boy frowns but picks up his fork and uses the side edge to cut off a piece of the remaining black bean enchilada on his plate, scooping the bite up with his fork and lifting it to his mouth. Dean watches Sam shoot a furtive glance at Cas as he chews. Cas rewards the boy with a warm smile for his compliance and something settles in Dean's stomach as the crisis is averted relatively painlessly.
"So." Dean starts, wanting to change the subject. "Sammy, how did that geometry test go today? I bet you aced it after all that studying you did this weekend."
Sam swallows what's in his mouth and turns toward Dean with a small sigh, accepting the question as the olive branch it is.
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Cas waits until they're alone, with Sam upstairs in his room working on his homework. Cas has his shirtsleeves rolled up, and is washing dishes, starting on the pots and pans Dean cooked with, while Dean clears the table. Dean places the empty plates in the sudsy water in the sink and steals a quick kiss from Cas. Sometimes it still feels unbelievable to Dean that the man in front of him is his, to be with and touch whenever he wants. He pulls back to see a warm smile on his boyfriend's face, the one that never fails to remind Dean that he's loved, and not alone, and so incredibly grateful for this man.
"I thought you did very well expressing yourself with Sam tonight, Dean." Cas says, and Dean can feel himself physically lighten as his body responds to the praise.
"Thanks. I really tried to do what we talked about, and hold him accountable for his behavior. And, I know his attitude's been pretty shitty the past couple of weeks, and he hasn't exactly been a joy to be around." Dean positions himself behind Cas and wraps his arms around the man's waist, just because he can, feeling the warmth of Cas's back against his chest, the solidness of his torso in his arms, resting his chin on Cas's shoulder and watching his boyfriend pull a submerged plate of the water and start scrubbing it with a sponge. "And, I'm sorry about that, Cas. You shouldn't have to put up with that kind of crap from him."
"You don't need to apologize for Sam's behavior, Dean. I understood coming into this that living with a teenager would be…..an adjustment."
Dean squeezes Cas lightly. "Yeah, but you shouldn't have to adjust to his bad attitude. I want to do better at helping him move past this shit and understand that there are consequences for his actions. You were right that I was letting him get away with too much, and it wasn't helping." Cas has helped Dean see his relationship with his brother more clearly in the time they've all lived together. Dean recognizes his proclivity for letting Sam get away with misbehavior, first as overcompensation for the mother Sam had lost as an infant, then to make up for the father who was gone for work for days at a time, and now for the loss of their father. Dean can recognize that not all of his indulgence toward Sam has been to his brother's benefit, and he wants to change that and be able to give Sam what he needs instead of just what the boy wants.
"I appreciate you taking our last conversation about this to heart. But, I wasn't expecting the next thing Sam asked for to be school related." Cas turns his neck to see Dean's face out of the corner of his eye. "I think we should let him go on the camping trip."
Dean lets out a breath and turns his face away from Cas, resting the side of his head on Cas's shoulder, feeling his face flush with shame that he had tried so hard to be what Sam needed and had still made the wrong choice and done the wrong thing. He hears Cas shut off the faucet, feels the man move as he reaches for a dish towel to dry his hands and gently extricates himself from Dean's hold. Dean lifts his head as Cas's shoulder slides out from under him as the man turns to face him.
Cas places his hands on Dean's sides, holding him gently at his waist. "I know it's just a camping trip, but I don't think we should keep him from any part of his educational experience as punishment. I think he should be allowed this outing with the rest of his class. He already had to switch schools for his sophomore year when you both moved in with me. I think the camping trip might offer valuable bonding opportunities with his new classmates. And, school is one area of his life in which Sam works very hard and doesn't require any prompting from us. I think it would serve Sam well if we respected that domain and didn't take aspects of it away to discipline him for undesirable behaviors at home."
Dean feels guilty for his quick reaction to say no to Sam without really thinking the whole situation through. "You're making some good points, Cas. I hadn't really thought about all of that. I guess I didn't think past 'Sammy's been acting like a little shit, so I'm saying no to the next thing he wants'."
"I can understand that. And, I'm not trying to undermine you, Dean." Dean finds himself staring into Cas's blue eyes and losing himself in the kindness there, the empathy and concern for the social well-being of a teenage boy who doesn't treat him with anywhere near the respect he deserves. "If you feel strongly that he needs to miss the camping trip, I will support that decision and help you enforce it with Sam. I just wanted to share my thinking with you."
"I appreciate you telling me this, Cas." Dean says. "And, I think you're right. He probably should get to go on the camping trip."
"We could consider taking away his phone, or something else important to him, for a few days instead." Cas says. "I am not suggesting his behavior doesn't merit punishment. Though, I do think that perhaps we should inform Sam of the potential consequences in advance so that he will understand what he can expect if his behavior doesn't improve. That seems like the fairest way to do it, since we did not bring up specific consequences the last time we spoke to him about this."
Dean feels his stomach tense at the suggestion. He realizes it's possible that he jumped on the camping trip because saying no to something new Sam was asking for felt like an easier option than actually grounding the boy or taking away privileges that he already has. That felt so much more like real punishment, and Dean can't wrap his head around being the person who punishes his brother. He was trying now, with Cas's help, to hold Sam accountable for household chores and rules, and to not tolerate disrespect, but the idea of actually punishing his little brother, when for so long he had been the person always in Sam's corner, does not sit well with Dean. It feels like a betrayal.
Dean closes the gap between them and presses himself against Cas's chest, feeling the man's arms wrap around his back, enveloping him in a warm hug. There are days when Dean wishes he could live his whole life in Cas's warm embrace, feeling as cherished and safe as he does in this moment. He feels one arm leave his back and Cas's palm press against the back of his head, fingers rubbing gently at the base of his skull, and Dean lays his head down on Cas's shoulder, his breath warm on his face tucked against Cas's neck.
"Can we think about that part later?" Dean tightens his squeeze around Cas's body. "I just want to enjoy being here with you right now, and feeling your body against me like this." Dean knows that if he lets the topic go too long, Cas will accuse him of avoidance and that Cas will be right, but he just doesn't want to deal with anything else right now.
Dean feels Cas's thigh slide between his own and rub slowly against his crotch, waking up his dick. Cas's hand leaves Dean's head and lands on his left ass cheek, squeezing firmly as he pulls Dean tighter against his thigh. Dean lets out a soft exhale and starts to move, rubbing himself urgently against Cas's leg as the heat builds in his groin. "Oh, fuck, Cas."
Dean feels a slap on his ass, soft enough that the sound of impact is muted by his jeans. He pants hard into Cas's neck as he feels the teasingly light tingle in his cheek and the surge of arousal that goes straight to his dick, leaving him wanting more. "Now, Dean." Cas speaks the words softly, directly into Dean's ear and Dean can feel the warmth of his breath accompanying the intimacy of the gesture. Dean hears the twinkle of mischief beneath Cas's fake sternness, the tone that tells him that Cas doesn't just want sex, he wants to play. "That kind of language will not be tolerated in this house." A part of Dean's brain wonders if there's something messed up about how hot it makes him when Cas repeats the same reprimand he used earlier on Sam. The rest of him doesn't care and just ruts even more desperately against Cas's thigh. "That sort of talk will earn you a good, hard spanking every time. I would have thought you'd learned your lesson by now, Dean."
Dean lifts his head to see the wicked little smile on Cas's face. "Can we, Cas? Please?" He all but begs.
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Forty-five minutes later, Dean is coming back to himself, spent in every way, on his knees in the backseat of his father's old chevy, pants and underwear down around his knees, forehead resting on the leather seat between his forearms, which had long given out supporting his weight. The inherited Impala is parked in Cas's detached garage, while Cas keeps his own car, which gets more frequent use, in the driveway. They had discovered fairly early into their new living arrangement that the spacious backseat of the old car, surrounded by cinder block walls, set a good twenty or thirty feet from the house, is the perfect spot for particularly loud, boisterous sex when Sam is home. It isn't that they're ashamed of what they're doing, but Cas has rules about things he doesn't believe Sam should be exposed to, such as hearing his older brother getting his ass spanked or listening to Dean crying out in ecstasy while Cas fucks him like their lives depend on it. Dean can't argue that he feels much more comfortable being vocal when he knows Sam is not within earshot, but he can admit that he finds the rules frustrating sometimes, like when they're making love in their bed late at night and Dean is desperate for something a little rough. No matter how much Dean begs in those situations, even for just one or two good hard slaps, Cas doesn't give in, holding fast to his belief that Sam is a child and his comfort has to come before their sexual gratification. It's something Dean loves about Cas, that he's willing to put Sam's needs before his own.
Dean raises his upper body and feels pain in his ass at the movement, tingling on the sensitized surface of his skin and throbbing through his muscles. He knows his ass must be pretty red from the spanking Cas has given him, first stretched out over his lap while Cas gave him a playfully stern lecture on swearing and mock-scolded him for being a naughty little boy who needs his mouth washed out with soap, and later, when Cas had brought him to the verge of cumming without having his dick touched and helped him onto his hands and knees, fucking him and slapping his ass just enough to keep the burn from the spanking pulsing through him. If Dean thinks about any of this too much, it leaves him with a bone-deep feeling of shame, so he tries not to think about how Cas spanking him makes him feel safely settled and completely free at the same time, or how being scolded for his naughtiness goes straight to his inner core, igniting an intense arousal that nothing else touches in quite the same way.
Dean feels a hand on his lower back, gently stopping his movement. "Do you feel ok, Dean?" He feels Cas gingerly running the fingers of his other hand across his right ass cheek. "You're a little redder than I intended." Dean hears the concern in Cas's voice. "This is going to be sore."
"S'ok, Cas." Dean's voice sounds a little out of it. "That was awesome."
"Let me clean you up before you move."
Dean nods and feels Cas reach around him to wipe down his stomach and groin with a wet wipe. Dean hangs his head and watches Cas pick up the towel that was beneath his body, fold it up to hide the damp spots from Dean's release, and pat Dean's belly and genitals dry with it. His ass gets the same gentle treatment with a fresh wet wipe and the towel before Cas moves on to clean himself. Dean can still remember the first time they had done this in the car, when Cas had insisted on a break mid-way through to run into the house and grab the wipes and towel. Dean had tried to convince him that it didn't matter. That people had been having sex in the backseat of cars forever, that surely cum must easily wipe off of leather. But, Cas hadn't been swayed, citing that Dean's father had kept the car in mint condition for over thirty years and the least they could do was minimize any damage from bodily fluids. That was the respectful thing to do, Cas had explained with a smile and a soft pat to Dean's bare ass as he had quickly redressed himself to run back into the house.
"All set. Thank you for that wonderful experience, my love." Dean looks over his shoulder and takes in Cas' grinning face.
"Thanks yourself, Cas." Dean says. "I really needed that."
Dean watches as his boyfriend bends down and places one feather soft kiss on his right cheek and one on his left. "Are you ready to get up, sweetheart?"
Dean nods and raises his upper body, letting Cas help him out of the car. They've learned it's much easier, and less painful, to put Dean's clothes back on in the garage than having him squirm around on a sore ass to do it in the backseat. They get themselves dressed and presentable and Dean licks two fingers and reaches up to tame a few pieces of Cas's slightly mussed sex hair.
Dean takes in the blissed out expression on Cas's face, and knows he must look the same.
"I love you so much, Cas."
Cas smiles and raises a gentle hand to cup the side of Dean's face. "I love you, too." Cas kisses Dean's lips slowly, then pulls back and takes Dean's hand in his, and they head back to the house.
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Sam is at his desk working on an English assignment on his laptop later that evening when he hears a knock on his bedroom door. He feels a spike of embarrassment over how he acted at dinner, how he's been acting in general lately, and he's hoping he's not about to get another talking to for his behavior. He misses his dad. He misses his old school and his friends. But, mostly he misses how his life used to be when it had been mostly him and Dean, when Dean was still acting like his brother instead of trying to be his parent, and he didn't need to feel nervous when Dean knocked on his bedroom door.
Sam sighs, not wanting to talk, but hoping that Dean is at least by himself. That much he can handle. "Come in."
Sam holds in another sigh as he watches Cas follow Dean into the room, both of them wearing small, contented smiles.
"Can we talk to you for a few minutes, Sammy?" Dean asks.
Sam nods, knowing he doesn't really have a choice. "Yeah, sure." What else can he say?
Cas smiles and gestures toward the bed. "Is it ok if we sit?"
Sam nods again. This is the kind of stuff that drives him crazy, how formal Cas always is about everything, asking permission to sit on a bed in his own house, or requiring Sam to get his permission before leaving the dinner table. Sam has never seen that at any single one of his friends' houses in his entire life. It's like the guy's on some ridiculous power trip. "Yeah, of course."
Sam watches them sit on the edge of his bed, and notes the subtle grimace that flashes across Dean's face.
Sam frowns. "Are you ok, Dean?"
"Huh? Me?" Dean looks caught off guard. "Yeah, I'm ok, Sammy. All's good on my end." Sam watches as an amused private look passes between the two men. Great. Another inside joke that Sam's on the outside of.
"What do you guys want to talk about?" Sam tries to keep the annoyance out of his voice, knowing anything perceived as disrespect will just prolong any conversation with Cas, and he wants to get this over with so he can return to his homework as quickly as possible.
"Well, Cas and I were talking, and we think you should go on the camping trip with your class."
Sam feels a smile spreading across his face. He quickly glances from his brother to Cas to make sure Cas is on board and that this isn't some kind of trick. The other man is smiling encouragingly. Sam looks back to Dean. "Really?"
"Really, kid." Dean confirms, grinning. "We thought about it, and we think you're right, that you shouldn't have to miss a school thing because of how you've been acting at home."
Sam feels his cheeks warming slightly with embarrassment at the reference to his recent bad behavior. He wonders if he's about to get an at home punishment to replace the school punishment that's just been lifted and his stomach flutters lightly. "Thanks, Dean."
"Thank Cas, too, Sammy. He's the one who convinced me that you should get to go." Dean is mirroring Cas's encouraging smile now, and Sam can feel his annoyance building in response.
Sam pushes down his resentment about being told to thank his brother's boyfriend like a little kid. He makes eye contact with Cas and does his best to keep anything that could be perceived as even remotely disrespectful out of his voice. "Thanks, Cas." The man gives him such a warm and genuine smile that Sam can feel himself involuntarily reciprocating. It makes him want to give Cas something more. "I really appreciate you talking to Dean about this."
"You're very welcome, Sam." Cas is grinning, clearly pleased with the interaction.
Sam hesitates, unsure if he should just quit while he's ahead, but knowing the comment he made about Cas not being family is going to gnaw at him if he doesn't say something. "And, Cas, I'm sorry for how I was earlier, at dinner and everything."
Cas's smile widens further and Dean's turns downright proud. Sam is surprised to find himself enjoying the approval. "Thank you, Sam." Cas says. "I very much appreciate you saying that. And, I forgive you."
Sam doesn't know why, but that annoys him, too. That Cas feels the need to formally forgive him. Who says that? Why can't he just say that it's all right or tell Sam not to worry about it, like any normal person would do when someone apologizes to them. Sam isn't sure if he's supposed to thank Cas for his forgiveness, and it leaves him fumbling awkwardly. "Uh, yeah, ok." Sam watches Dean's smile dampen slightly and he figures he made the wrong choice yet again. He really wants to wrap this up. "So, um, if that's it, thank you guys, but I should probably get back to my homework. I need to write another two pages on Lord of the Flies for tomorrow. So…" If it were just Dean in his room, Sam would turn back to his laptop to drive the point home about how busy he is, but he doesn't dare do that in front of Cas, knowing it would likely earn him another sternly worded lecture on respect, and Sam has had his fill of those.
"We're almost done, dude." Dean says. Sam watches his brother take a deep breath and feels an uptick of apprehension. "We also wanted to talk to you about how you've been behaving lately. Leaving messes around the house, not doing the few chores we ask you to do. Giving us attitude, especially Cas, if we ask you to do something you don't feel like doing." If it was just Dean, Sam would interrupt now and shut this down with vague promises of being better in the future. But, Cas's presence changes things, so instead Sam focuses on actually listening to his brother. "This kind of stuff needs to stop, Sammy. So, we're going to revisit this conversation a week from today and if your attitude hasn't improved, there are going to be some consequences for your behavior that you probably aren't going to like, like maybe losing your phone for a few days. Do you understand me?"
Sam nods. "Yeah."
"Yes, Dean." Cas corrects, his expression firm, but encouraging. Sam watches the subtle surprise flicker across Dean's face and it makes Sam feel better knowing that Dean thinks this is as ridiculous as he does. When Dean doesn't say anything, it hits Sam that his brother is so firmly on Cas's side that he won't stick up for Sam even when he disagrees with one of Cas's rules. The realization makes Sam feel lonelier than he's ever felt in his brother's company.
Sam holds back an eyeroll as he dutifully repeats. "Yes, Dean."
That earns him another pleased smile from Cas and a look of relief from his brother. "All right, Sammy." Dean stands up. "We'll get out of your hair now and let you get back to work." Dean holds his arms out, a playful smile on his face. "Any chance I can get a hug before we go?"
Sam is not exactly in a hugging mood, but he rises from his chair anyway and allows Dean to pull him into a hug. He can admit that being held doesn't feel terrible, but if he can't be alone with his brother, he just wants to be by himself.
"I love you, Sammy." Dean says as he kisses the crown of Sam's head.
"Love you, too, Dean." Sam mumbles into his brother's shoulder. Sam wonders if this is what his relationship with his brother is going to look like forever, having to have what should be private family moments in front of a man who still mostly feels like a stranger to Sam.
Dean releases him and Sam sees Cas take a tentative step toward him, a small, hopeful smile on his face. Before Sam can stop himself, he's sitting back down at his desk, turned back toward his laptop, aiming for preoccupied obliviousness.
Sam feels Dean playfully ruffle his hair. "Goodnight, Sammy."
The gentle pat on the back that follows from Cas makes Sam feel like a jerk. "Goodnight, Sam. Sleep well."
"Goodnight guys." Sam mutters to the keyboard of his laptop.