Hiroki shut his eyes in content as the hot shower water cascaded over his body, washing away the evidence of his lovemaking with Nowaki the night before. Steam rolled off of his body in clouds, drifting out of the top of the glass shower door.

"Mmm," Hiroki hummed, tipping his head back and allowing the water to hit his throat and waterfall down his front. He chuckled to himself, watching as the water ramped off of his slightly raised belly. "Do you like the hot water, baby?"

Hiroki smiled gently, putting a fond hand on the taught skin over the tiny rise of his stomach.

"You're so small…" Hiroki whispered, coiling his arms around himself and cuddling with his hardly noticeable baby bump. His eyes opened slightly and he frowned to himself, however. He wondered how big his stomach would end up getting.

He wondered how big his stomach would get before Nowaki began to think of him as ugly.

Hiroki reached up to touch his lips, still feeling the tingle of Nowaki's good-morning kiss. Would there be a day that Nowaki wouldn't want to kiss him because the baby bump would get too big? Hiroki self-consciously brushed a wet strand of hair behind his ear, rubbing his belly with his free hand.

"Don't get too big, baby," Hiroki breathed. His voice got even quieter with his next words. "I want to look perfect for your daddy."

Hiroki's lips trembled as he thought back to breakfast. He suddenly wished he hadn't eaten all of the danishes by himself. He wished he hadn't had a bagel with it, and a glass of orange juice. He wished he had just had an apple or banana.

"What am I going to do…?" Hiroki whimpered softly, covering his face with his hands. Before he could continue moping to himself, though, there was a knock at the door.

"Hiro-san? Do you need anything? Do you have enough shampoo and soap?" Nowaki asked from the other side of the door. Hiroki looked up, a blush rising to his cheeks.

"Um… yes. Thank you, Nowaki," Hiroki replied. He heard Nowaki chuckle on the other side.

"Make sure you wash under your baby bump," Nowaki said jokingly. Hiroki pinched his lips together, looking down.

"…Haha, yeah…" Hiroki answered. There was a pause, and Hiroki jumped as the bathroom door opened. He could see the silhouette of Nowaki on the other side of the glass shower doors. Before he had time to protest, he saw Nowaki let the towel around his hips flop to the ground. The shower door opened and Nowaki boldly stepped inside, sliding the door shut behind him. Hiroki cringed against the wall farthest from Nowaki, hiding the front of his body in embarrassment. Nowaki's eyes darkened in slight irritation as he stepped forward and grabbed Hiroki's arm. With a squeak, Hiroki was yanked into Nowaki's chest and was held there by two immovable arms.

"You've been preoccupied recently," Nowaki murmured, lowering his chin to nuzzle against the side of Hiroki's head. "And you're hiding your body from me more than usual, even though I tell you not to. Would you like to tell me what's wrong?"

Hiroki frowned into Nowaki's dampened skin, squeezing his eyes shut. He slithered his hands between them, resting his hands on Nowaki's chest, just above his heart.

"Nothing is wrong," Hiroki lied, his voice wavering slightly. When there was no answer form Nowaki, Hiroki looked up questioningly. Nowaki was staring down at him, his cobalt gaze looking annoyed.

"Hiro-san, I know something's wrong. I'm not ignorant," he said firmly. "Don't take me for an idiot."

"I'm not," Hiroki mumbled, averting his eyes. "I… just don't want to talk about it, alright?"

"No, it's not alright. I don't know if you're upset with me or not. Please talk to me, Hiro-san. I want to be here for you. I love you," Nowaki said, his eyes flickering. Hiroki clenched his jaw.

"It's not something I can talk to you about," Hiroki said quietly. He looked up as Nowaki's face fell and contorted slightly in pain. He let his arms slip from Hiroki and he took a step back.

"Oh. Okay. Sorry I interrupted your shower," Nowaki said, his voice tense. Hiroki trembled as he clasped his hands above his heart and watched Nowaki step out.

No!

Hiroki rushed out of the shower and caught Nowaki just before he could open the bathroom door. He pressed his forehead into his lover's broad back, digging his fingertips into the dampened skin.

"Please, I don't want to fight," Hiroki begged, throwing his pride and shame out the window. "Don't be angry. Please…"

Hiroki desperately clung to Nowaki, shaking. Nowaki sighed and turned to face Hiroki, gathering his dripping, little body into his arms once more.

"Do you understand why I'm frustrated? You need to tell me what's on your mind when you're upset. I don't want to go down the road of miscommunication again and let there be another disaster. I've had enough of those for a lifetime," Nowaki said lowly, tightening his grip on Hiroki. "So, please, I'm begging you, Hiro-san. Tell me what's wrong."

Hiroki sighed.

"It's got nothing to do with you. I was just um… worrying," Hiroki said. "I'm worried about the baby- I don't want to get into the same situation as Akihiko and Misaki."

It wasn't a complete lie. He really did worry about the safety of the baby after hearing Misaki and Akihiko's story. Hiroki felt bad for making it sound like he doubted his trust in Nowaki's ability to protect him, but he couldn't tell Nowaki about his actual concern. It was silly. Vain.

Vain like the receptionist who had flaunted her looks and had gotten Nowaki so angry. Hiroki wasn't about to be like that woman.

"I understand, Hiro-san," Nowaki said gently. He cupped Hiroki's face in his hands and rained kisses down onto his temples, caressing his little lover's blushing cheeks with his thumb. "You don't have to worry anymore. I will protect you and the- no, our baby. I would give up my life if it meant your safety, Hiro-san."

Hiroki clutched Nowaki to him with all of the strength he could muster.

"D-Don't say things like that," Hiroki said softly, his fiery blush heating his chest. "You need to be alive to help me take care of this baby when it's born, idiot."

Nowaki chuckled, squeezing Hiroki in his arms.

"Don't worry, no matter what happens, I assure you that I will protect you."

Hiroki hummed absentmindedly later that Monday night as he hung his grey felt suit on the hanger, patting out the wrinkles. He hung it up in his closet, making sure it was flat against the other clothes that hung there.

"Thanks for washing my coat, Hiro-san. I completely forgot about it," said Nowaki from behind. Hiroki looked over his shoulder just in time to see Nowaki sweep into the room, his medical coat swishing about his legs as he walked.

"Don't forget something as important as that next time," Hiroki said sternly, shutting the closet door and turning around fully to cross his arms over his chest. Despite his annoyance, however, Hiroki beckoned Nowaki to him and reached up to fix the collar of the turtleneck sweater he always wore with his coat.

"Yes, Hiro-san," Nowaki said cheerfully, fondly watching Hiroki straighten his attire.

"The nerve of that hospital, making you work from eight until four in the morning! What do they think you are, an owl?" Hiroki ranted, mostly to himself. Nowaki chortled.

"It's fine, Hiro-san. I had a good night's sleep," Nowaki said. Before Hiroki could say anything more, he stooped down to peck Hiroki's lips. Flushing scarlet, Hiroki pinched his lips together and turned away.

"Have a good night," Hiroki said softly, awkwardly scratching his arm. Nowaki smiled gently.

"Thank you. I'll see you in the morning, Hiro-san," Nowaki said. He patted Hiroki's head and caressed his cheek one last time before sweeping from the room. Hiroki stood in the exact same place Nowaki had left him, listening as the front door to opened and shut, signaling Nowaki's departure.

Hiroki slowly went to the closet and opened it once more. He reached into the pocket of his suit jacket and retrieved the small booklet he had received from Kanagawa, flipping absently through it. He wandered around the room, skimming through the bios of choirs around the world that would be participating in the alumni concerts. Hiroki sat on the edge of the bed and glanced up at the wall mirror to stare at his reflection. He reached up to timidly prod at his throat, rubbing the slight bumps beneath his flesh where his bronchial tube rested. He hummed, feeling the bumps vibrate.

"Houkago no yuuyami warau kimi no senaka…" Hiroki whispered beneath his breath, his pitch rising and falling ever so slightly as he half-sung, half-spoke. He flushed scarlet as his natural vibrato resurfaced, adding spin to his words.

"Hisokana sasayaki fureta koto no nai omoi no naka."

Hiroki stood from his spot on the bed, furrowing his eyebrows and walking to the mirror. He touched the glass and concentrated as he softly sang the bridge of the song:

"Boku no naka no kimi to kimi no naka no boku de,

Karamaru miraiiro no rain."

His lips twitched as his voice came out perfectly, just as it had all those years ago. He took a deep breath, diving into the chorus.

"Ameagari no machi no nioi to

Yumemitaina himitsu wo mune ni daite

Nandomo nakisou ni natte mata warau

Kangaeru yori zutto hayaku

Sono mune ni tobikometara ii

Tsunagatteyuke todoke."

Hiroki smiled as he remembered all of the vocal technique Kanagawa had taught him back in high school. Shifting, Hiroki stood up straight before the mirror, raising his chest and lifting his soft palette. His vibrato reached its full potential, and Hiroki's voice rose up into the air. He took another deep breath, stretching his mouth open wide as he hit the peak of his song, his high voice ringing throughout the house and creating a powerful overtone.

"Nani yori mo daijina kimi no mae de

Kizutsukanai youni daiji ni shiteta no wa sou jibun

Sono hitogoto ga moshimo sayonara no kawari ni natteshimattemo

Ari no mama subete…"

Laughing and grinning triumphantly as he nailed every high note, Hiroki licked his lip and softened his voice to create musical contrast within his song.

Adokenai konna kimochi mo

Hajiketobu hodo waraiaeta hi mo

Taisetsu ni sodateteikeru youni…"

Hiroki hit the climax of his song, bringing his voice up to its full volume once more and tipping his head back in preparation for the highest note in the song.

"Honno sukoshi otona ni natteku

Kimi ni naritai boku wo koete

Tsunagatteyuke

Ima sugu kimi ni

Todoke…"

Hiroki panted, noting that his voice had unintentionally gone a little sharp during the high note.

He was proud. He had done it. He had sung for the first time since graduating high school. To top it off, he also had made only one mistake: a mistake that could easily be fixed with a few touch-ups to his neglected singing voice.

"Hiro-san."

Hiroki gasped and whirled around to face Nowaki, who was standing in the doorway of the bedroom, his black briefcase on the floor and spilling its contents everywhere. He was shaking, gripping the archway with white knuckles to support his wavering body. When he spoke, his voice trembled, thick with emotion.

"Please… please, Hiro-san. Perform in the alumni concert."