Beatrix's hands shook as they tied off her braid. She had to redo it three times, because of how unsteady her hands were. She still wasn't satisfied with it, but she didn't have time to redo it a fourth time. She had to get down to the courtyard where her carriage was waiting. Despite the time until she had to be there ticking down, she couldn't seem to convince herself to get up from her dressing table. She simply sat there and stared at her frowning reflection until one of the servants came to fetch her.
It took every ounce of strength to stand, and leave her chambers, but she did her best not to show it. Her mind went blank and focused on the way her muscles moved as she walked. She focused on how deep her breaths were. She studied the barely there cracks in the wall. It helped distract from the growing anxiety, but it also meant that she arrived at the courtyard faster than she wanted.
Her heart hurt as she saw Alistair standing there dismissing the servants that had helped load the carriage. His hands were clasped behind his back, and she could see him repeatedly clenching them to relieve his own stress. She thought she saw something metallic, but didn't pay it much mind. The servant who had accompanied her to the courtyard bid her goodbye with a nod, and left with the others, leaving her alone with Alistair, the carriage drivers and a handful of guards. She wished that she was alone with him, but she understood why the others need to be there.
She walked up to Alistair wordlessly, and simply leaned against him. It was uncomfortable with her armor on, but she didn't mind, and knew that he didn't either when he slid his arm around her and kissed the top of her head.
Alistair finally spoke after a few moments of silence, "I wish I could go with you."
"And I wish I could stay."
He turned fully to look at her, and slid his hand from her back to her hand, "Are you sure that you have to go? The Wardens here need you, don't they?"
"The first insisted that I go."
"And you couldn't fight it? It wouldn't be the first time you've butted heads with him."
"I think that's why he wants me to go, and while that actually really concerns me, I think that I have to go. This is..." her voice cracked, "this could change everything. I don't trust anyone besides the people I am bringing with me to do this."
He looked less stressed now, and more sad. She could see that he was trying his best not to cry. He cradled the side of her face, and his own voice shook as he spoke again, "I know, but, I don't want you to leave, Bea. We don't know how long you'll be gone, or what will happen. I just... I don't want to lose you, my love."
She placed her hands on either side of his face, "You won't lose me. I will come back, and I will have the cure. The time I am gone will be made up for with our new lives. I promise."
He leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on her lips, and another on her forehead, "And I believe you."
He pulled her into a hug. After a few moments she realized his left hand was balled up against her back, but she didn't say anything about it. They didn't move until one of the carriage drivers awkwardly coughed, and reminded them that Beatrix needed to leave.
As they pulled away, Beatrix wiped the tears that had fallen away. She went to give him a final kiss, but he placed his right hand on her shoulder.
"I have something for you," he said, and opened his left hand. A necklace sat in his palm. The chain was obviously of a high quality make, but the small rose pendant was what caught her eye. The stem and leaves were made of what looked like pure silver, but the petals had tiny, brightly colored rubies set in them. She gasped slightly when she saw it.
"Can I put it on you?" he asked, and she nodded eagerly. She turned, and he did the clasp. She touched the pendant gingerly. It was an obvious tribute to the rose he had given her all those years ago during the Blight.
"I hade it and a matching one made when I heard that you were leaving," he said when she turned around. He pulled out a matching pendant from under his clothes. "I know it's cheesy, but I thought you would appreciate it since I can't go with you."
"I love it, Alistair, and I love you."
"I love you too, now you should go, love, before I decide to accidentally make you too late."
They shared a final kiss, and he helped her into the carriage. They stared at each other as the carriage pulled out of the courtyard until they could no longer see each other anymore. Her fingers closed around the small rose pendant as she rode to Vigil's keep. Though it was just a small piece of metal and a collection of stones, it helped ease the anxiety of not knowing when she would return.