SEVEN OF CUPS
upright — choices, searching for purpose,
illusion, fantasy, wishful thinking
reversed —lack of purpose, disarray,
confusion, clarity, making choices
NOVEMBER 1975
THERE WAS A PARTICULAR blonde maiden that caught Regulus' attention when he chose to hole himself up in the library while everyone else was having their lunch at the Great Hall. The girl was hunched over the table, browsing a book as she scribbled in her notebook with an all too familiar pen he can recognize.
As the boy approached that corner of the library, he heard her mutter to herself as her finger traced an unfamiliar sheet of paper.
"—In order to find the cusp, represented as spokes on the wheel, observe the horizontal line across the natal chart. The leftmost arm signifies the beginning of the first house, also known as one's ascendant. Proceed counterclockwise to locate the other cusps of the next—"
"What are you reading about?" Regulus interrupts her train of thought, causing the Hufflepuff to jolt in surprise.
"Regulus," Amaris smiles as she looks up from her notes to greet him. Not a second later, the girl turns to her left and right, checking if there were any onlookers before whispering in concern, "Should you be talking to me in public?"
"No one's around," he shrugs nonchalantly as if he's already confirmed such beforehand. A smirk tugs on his lips as he adds, "And I can always obliviate them if I have to."
She eyes him warily at that.
"I won't. It was just a suggestion," the Slytherin assured before motioning towards the mess of papers on the desk. "So, what are you doing?"
"Studying Astrology," Amaris informs him, pulling out a chart from underneath the pile to show the boy standing behind her seat.
He makes a face at that, scrunching his nose in derision, "Divination?"
"This branch of Divination makes use of numerical patterns in the same way Arithmancy does. Plus, it makes use of star maps as we do in Astronomy. If anything, it's a mix of both worlds so quit giving me that look."
"The way you're comparing Astrology to Arithmancy is laughable. As for Astronomy, that discipline consists of facts, not baseless interpretations. Divination makes use of generalized descriptions that only make it seem like it's personally catered to a person themselves. Therefore, it's absolutely and utterly ridiculous."
The Hufflepuff huffed, "Too good for Divination, are you?"
"It's bollocks, Amaris," Regulus scoffed. "Do you honestly want to believe in something that dictates your whole life based on what's claimed to be destined for you?"
"I do believe in fate, but I don't think it has to be referred to as something absolute," she refutes him. "The fact that we can predict the future provides us with an opportunity to change it. A small alteration undoubtedly goes a long way. In the Muggle world, we call it the Butterfly Effect."
"Muggles, really?" the pure-blood snorts.
"Hey, they made a pretty convincing point!" Amaris defended. "It's involved in time travel and considering the existence of Time-Turners, which Pandora had recently rambled to me about, you can't completely deny its existence."
"Those nutters from Ravenclaw are rubbing off on you."
She gazes back at his eyes just as daringly, adamant to defend her friends, "Pandora and Xenophilius aren't mad. If anything, they're ahead of their time."
He only returns it with a scoff, "As if."
.
Growing exasperated, Amaris instructs him, patting the empty seat beside hers. "Sit. I'll give you a demonstration and then you can tell me whether it's poppycock or not."
The boy takes the seat, only to drawl out sarcastically as if he was confident in proving her wrong, "Alright. Fascinate me."
"Hand, please," the Hufflepuff opens her palm towards him, waiting for him to rest the back of his hand on hers.
"Hand?" Regulus looks at her incredulously. "I thought you were learning about Astrology?"
"I'm still learning about Astrology," she corrects him cheekily. "We tackled Palmistry last year, so I'm a lot more confident giving you a palm reading than trying to decipher your horoscope."
"Fine," Regulus ends up huffing haughtily at that, trying to ignore the warmth spreading in his chest when he places his hand on hers. He grumbles as if his pride won't allow him to concede to her, "It's all the same anyway."
.
Amaris gives him a mischievous little grin as she whips out a blue pen from her pencil case to write on the groves of his palm.
The Slytherin immediately jerks back to snarl, "What the hell do you think you're doing—"
"Shhh!" the girl hushed, tilting her chin up to motion towards the librarian roaming around the grounds. "Madam Pince is going to kick us out if you don't keep your voice down."
"Whose fault is that?" Regulus shoots her a glare.
The corners of her lips tug up wryly as she whispered, dismissing his concerns, "You can erase it with magic when you're done."
And much to his chagrin, he ends up indulging her like he often does.
.
Amaris was leaning awfully near him as she continued to draw on his hand, encircling islands, tracing branches, and trailing along broken lines. She was close enough for him to hear her breathing, and he felt an odd tingle from the feeling of her skin against his.
Thankfully, before Regulus could continue to pull on that particular thread —before he becomes overly conscious of their proximity and manages to do something beyond foolish— Amaris disrupts his train of thought as she begins the reading.
"The most important lines in Palmistry are these three," the Hufflepuff caps her pen before dragging a finger against each line on his palm.
"Your Head Line is more straight than curved, which means you tend to lean on traditional thinking. Its length shows how smart and brilliant you are. The way it's separated from the Life Line means that you're also a rather independent person. No matter how difficult your problems will be, you'll be able to overcome them."
"No need for flattery, Leclair," he snorts in amusement.
She ignored his mocking tone as she continued to explain, "—But despite this, you suffer from a sense of inferiority."
The smug look on his face morphs into a scowl, "You—"
"If I struck a nerve then that only confirms that there's a certain truth to it, Reg," the Hufflepuff retorts smoothly, a knowing smile playing on her lips. She goes as far as to challenge him, "Should I go on?"
He clicks his tongue with indignation, "Finish the bloody thing, and then I'll take my time proving you wrong."
"The Heart Line shows your attitude when it comes to romance and whatnot. It ends between the Mount of Jupiter and Saturn, indicating true love," she continued to trace his palm. "However, the split at the end curves downwards, depicting your willingness to sacrifice everything for the one you love."
Regulus lets out a grunt as if to disagree with such a foolish notion. Slytherins were infamous for their natural instinct of self-preservation, after all.
He doubts there was any truth in it, but regardless, Amaris proceeds.
"The Life Line doesn't necessarily portray longevity but instead it reflects your vitality and life energy… See this?" the maiden motions towards the crease near his thumb, "It's more straight than curved and it sticks close to your thumb. It means you're cautious about relationships. Your energy is limited and you're prone to exhaustion."
There's a familiar warmth stemming from her chest, albeit it was definitely not the usual wave of affection she held towards the boy. She pulls on the cord around her neck to pull it out of her clothes as if wrapping her fingers around it would alleviate its growing heat.
The witch is adamant to ignore it as she continued, "Broken lines depict illness or danger but this short parallel line between that means that you will eventually overcome it, turning danger into safety or recovering from said disease—"
.
"I…" Amaris finally gives into the growing urge to peer into the hole of the Dobbie stone. It turns out to be a fatal mistake on her part.
Her words got caught in her throat as the noise reverberated in her ears, echoing loudly in their midst.
It feels both familiar and new, yet the neverending pull and overlapping of sounds made it feel like someone drilled through her head, or better yet as if someone shoved a wand up her nose to pull her brains out.
There were three things she managed to make out of it: the sound of water and crashing waves; the scream of the boy in front of her shouting in pain; the hiss of a snake whispering in her ear.
It overlaps in her head like clattering pans and ringing bells. Her ears feel like they'll start bleeding.
Make it stop.
Make it stop. Make it stop. MAKE IT STOP.
.
"Amaris!" Regulus whispered harshly, snapping the witch out of her trance. She opens her eyes to catch sight of his grey orbs eyeing her warily. And yet, the girl continued to press her hands against her ears as if to shield her from some unfathomable racket.
Something about the way she was suddenly crumbling against the desk caused a sense of fear to well up in him.
She was whimpering in pain, tears welling up in her eyes despite their reluctance to fall.
"What's wrong?" he attempts to gain an answer out of her, but to no avail, the girl merely shakes her head in an attempt to brush him off.
Amaris feels a cold shiver run down her spine like the cool touch of a blade gently grazing her skin.
"Are you— Are you alright?"
Despite the way Regulus had been trying to check on her, she only managed to answer weakly, hands still pressed against her ears, "I… I'm fine."
If anything, the cracks in her voice only proved otherwise.
.
She clenches her eyes shut as a stinging sensation spreads throughout her left arm, skin feeling like it was being seared by fire.
Regulus holds onto both of her arms, forcing her to look him in the eye. It was his own attempt to intervene in her restless state.
"Amaris—"
"I said I'm fine!" she eventually snaps, pulling her left arm back.
He stiffened, releasing her from his grip and recoiling as she sought.
In realization of how she had lashed out at him, Amaris also freezes. Guilt settles in her stomach as a lodge forms in her throat. She looked back at him with wide eyes when her actions had finally dawned on her, "Sorry… I'm so sorry. I was just—"
"What the hell did you do, Black?"
.
A venomous voice cuts through before they get a proper chance to talk about what had occurred.
Two figures were standing right behind them. Pandora Lestrange held her wand, aiming it towards the unsuspecting Slytherin, whilst Xenophilius Lovegood hooked one of her arms with his in an attempt to hold her back from harming anyone in the library.
The former glared daggers at Regulus Black as if he was being condemned to drop dead in Azkaban— because here it was:
The gut feeling she refused to acknowledge.
She knew. She knew that Regulus Black would be more trouble than he's worth.
And somehow, despite the lack of conclusive proof, despite the way that Pandora Lestrange was never one to put her faith completely on the unfathomable, she can't bring herself to think otherwise.
Despite how Amaris Leclair had cleared up the misunderstanding in the library that occurred almost an entire year ago, Pandora Lestrange refuses to let her guard down.
She tried. Really, in her defense, she gave it her all.
The Ravenclaw had considered their similar backgrounds, had taken into account the way her best friend seemed awfully fond of the boy, had paid attention to how comfortable they were around each other— And she didn't want to be the one who'd ruin all of that but…
Bloody hell, Pandora wasn't willing to take the chance to believe in the boy even if Amaris had constantly insisted that it was her fault for jumping to conclusions and not taking his housemates in regard because Regulus was only attempting to protect her (something none of them would have ever imagined).
It wasn't entirely because he was a Slytherin, Pandora would defend. (Although as a group, they were undoubtedly the last people that should be trusted in all of Hogwarts)—
No, it was because she was aware of the glimpse of pain present in the girl's eyes when they heard him call her that notorious slur.
Even if the Hufflepuff's facial features didn't give her away, Pandora had stuck by Amaris' side and observed long enough to know —to see— the truth.
Regulus Black was trouble.
Not merely because of Amaris' evident attachment to him —not simply because of their incredibly distinct background— but also because he can't be trusted to own up to what he had gotten himself into.
Unlike the confidence she had in her own abilities to protect her best friend from their fucked-up pure-blood society, Pandora can't trust Regulus enough to sacrifice the same for Amaris Leclair.
Thus, why Xenophilius Lovegood had found himself running behind the furious Ravenclaw when they had encountered the pair in the library later that day.
.
He tried to stop her. That notion could be proven by how the Ravenclaw boy had managed to wrap his arm around her waist, restraining her from jumping into anything rashly. But nevertheless, such an attempt clearly had its limits, seeing as the maiden had still managed to hold her wand up, aiming it dangerously towards the unsuspecting Slytherin.
"What the hell did you do, Black?" Pandora had seethed.
Regulus Black evenly matched her glare, sneering at the accusation, "I didn't do anything, Lestrange."
He was standing up from his seat as if the difference in their height was a sure-fire way to intimidate her.
The Ravenclaw didn't budge an inch.
"Then, explain why she's—"
"Regulus didn't do a thing," Amaris stood in between them in an attempt to shield the boy despite her pounding headache, "It was my fault. I was practicing Divination, Dora."
Xenophilius ignores the tension between the two other pure-bloods, asking the question that seemed to matter the most, "It happened again, didn't it?"
Amaris winces slightly at that as if she were a child being berated by her parents.
Pandora seemed to calm down at that, the boy finally releasing her from his lock as she heaved a sigh.
"Amaris—" the girl began, only to be cut off by her friend's stubborn insistence.
"I'm fine. I've done readings before and I came out unscathed. It's just a little headache."
Regulus doesn't let her off that easily, turning to Xeneophilius, "What do you mean by again? How often does this happen?"
"Whenever she makes readings it's terrifyingly accurate, but she also gets too immersed in them that she ends up getting headaches or fevers…" Pandora answers matter-of-factly. "We haven't ruled out the specific cause. Although, I'm inclined to believe it's also because she's prone to overworking."
"Am not," Amaris mumbles in protest, pain not subsiding in the least.
"Are too."
"Says the girl who immerses herself in a pile of books without realizing that the sun is up—"
.
The Slytherin averts their attention, turning Amaris around to force her to look at him, "I know a charm for headaches, why don't you let me—"
"It's no use, Black," Pandora cuts him off, protectively linking her arm with Amaris' to tug her away from the boy. "Charms and potions don't work for her condition. It's not that she's immune to magic… It's just— It's hard to explain, alright?"
Regulus rolls his eyes at the Ravenclaw's antics while the Hufflepuff continues her attempts to mediate the hostile tension between the two infamous purebloods.
"I told you, it's fine. They also provide Muggle medicine in the infirmary and those work just fine—"
"Does it have anything to do with this stone?"
Xenophilius answers Regulus' question rather reluctantly, "There wasn't any conclusive proof."
"I tried it myself," Pandora confirmed. "It's just a stone. Although, I think Professor Dumbledore is keeping more than we ought to know"
"Is she a…"
"Seer? It's hard to confirm. We can't tell whether that stone is the cause or if it's an inherent talent. And there's no way to prove that what she sees is even part of the future. She doesn't even remember her visions."
"But does it have an influence over those visions?"
Xenophilius answers this time, "It's a Dobbie stone. They claim that it allows one to see the Otherworldly."
"Not that," Regulus reiterates his point. "I meant magical properties, curses, or whatever bloody pest there is."
"There are engravings on the stone. At first, I thought they might have been ancient runes, but I've tried to go over them and they're absolute rubbish. They might as well be a poor attempt at an aesthetic," Pandora explained.
Amaris merely looks at the three, unable to fathom how they were both talking about her and casting her aside at the same time. She doubts they'd buy it even if she had consistently and adamantly insisted that she was fucking fine.
"No surprise there," Regulus scoffed haughtily, reaching out for the pendant hanging on Amaris' neck. "The results might be different if I give it a shot. Hand it over."
The Hufflepuff shields it in protest "No—"
Pandora scowled, "Arrogant prick. Are you looking down on my ability to read runes?"
"Doubting means I believed in you at some point, Lestrange," he retorts easily. "I never did."
"Be my guest, Black—"
"Stop," Amaris muttered. The pain overlaps with the noise and their arguing voices, but she says it too softly for the other two to hear.
It's Xenophilius who interrupts their ongoing debate by tapping both of their shoulders to say, "Pardon me but I believe hearing you two argue may make her headache worse than it is."
.
It seemed to work efficiently, seeing as the other two fourth-years had immediately turned towards the maiden, concerned expressions plastered on their faces.
Pandora attempts to make up for her behavior by offering, "Let's go, I'll bring you to Madam Pomfrey."
As much as Regulus would love to do the honors himself and as much as he hated being kept in the shadows, the boy was perfectly aware that they couldn't be seen together. It was at times like this he was a tad bit envious of the courage Pandora Lestrange had.
Either way, Amaris had taken it upon herself to refuse their assistance, "It's alright. I think I can manage by myself. Can you watch over my things instead?"
"Ames—"
"Thanks, Dora. Don't worry, I'll tell Poppy you said hi," the Hufflepuff continued before the other had a chance to protest. Forcing a smile on, she turns to each of the two boys, "Xeno, thanks for keeping her in line. And I'll see you tonight, Reg."
And just like that, Amaris Leclair made a run for it before any of them had the chance to follow.
. . .
"Poppy?" Among all the things she said, the first thing that registered in Regulus' mind was how friendly the maiden seemed to be with the school matron.
As awkward as it was for the three of them to be left with each other without their mediator around, Pandora gives her all to act civilly in Amaris' favor, "She's been on good terms with Madam Pomfrey ever since she was stuck at the infirmary last December."
"She was— What?" Regulus snaps his head to face her, a look of incredulity plastered on his face. "How often does that girl get sick?"
"Oh, pipe down, Black," she crossed her arms together. If not for his concern for her best friend, the Ravenclaw wouldn't have spared him the truth. "Remember when you thought she was avoiding you? She wasn't doing it on purpose. We told you, she feels ill every time she peers into that stupid stone."
Xenophilius opted to keep his mouth shut, slightly intimidated by both of them together. But it seemed that their tempers had quelled and the tension between them had considerably dissipated as they continued conversing about the particular Hufflepuff.
He thinks that there were a lot of things Pandora and Regulus both had in common— the way they cared so deeply for Amaris for one. But they didn't need to know that.
After witnessing them both, he can only assume that expressing such an opinion would inevitably cause them to blow a fuse and revert to their quarreling.
So instead, he opts for world peace.
.
"Amaris wants to be a healer so the matron is taking her under her wing. Sometimes she just visits the infirmary to learn a little more about it," Pandora had informed the Slytherin, speaking both endearingly and enthusiastically as if she was teaching a subject she was confident in.
"We're just fourth years," Regulus says, believing it was too early to be dwelling on such.
"So what?" the Ravenclaw scoffs. "We've all given our future a thought. The twins want to be Aurors, Mary wants to be a professional Quidditch player, I for one want to be an inventor, and Xeno here is planning to be a Magizoologist or a journalist."
"You never did? Think about the future, that is?" the other boy finally joins in. Not once did Xenophilius Lovegood think that he'd ever have a civil conversation with the infamous Regulus Black.
"What's there to think about?" the Slytherin mutters derisively, "There's a war looming over our heads. We don't know what to make of the future—"
"I don't care what you think, Black," Pandora hissed before he even gets the chance to finish his words. "But don't go downplaying Amaris' dream. She's been through a lot."
It takes a whole beat before he brings up the proverbial unicorn in the room.
"Does that aspiration of hers have anything to do about her parents?"
Pandora looks at him agape, "She told you?"
Instead of answering her question, he merely quirks an eyebrow, "She said you and MacDonald knew the gist of things."
The girl repeats her words, tone entirely different, "She told you?"
"What's the matter?" Xenophilius asks in concern.
"She…" Pandora looks almost scandalized. "Amaris never talks about herself unless you pry— We had to pry. And she just told you?!"
Xenophilius attempts to pacify her by rubbing circles on her back, "It's not a competition, Dora. Maybe she just didn't want you to worry… And well, unlike you guys, I doubt she ever expected Black to be concerned."
(If Amaris were to hear that, she would've wondered if Xenophilius was a Legilimens, but she wasn't here so instead—)
"Did you—"
"I don't extort information out of her," Regulus talks over her as if he knew what the girl was about to insinuate. "She told me. We talk. And there's an unspoken rule in which we don't press each other for answers. So calm the fuck down Lestrange, I'm sure she hasn't said anything that she hasn't already shared with you."
"You don't get it, do you?" Pandora laughs mirthlessly. "I find out things. I watch her close enough to tell—" Because Amaris builds a wall around herself, showing just enough but never letting anyone in as if they couldn't afford to care for her— As if she's going to be some sort of burden.
And yet, of all people, Regulus Black seemed to be the person most likely to break past that.
It's not fair.
It's not fair because what if she's been looking at this the other way around?
What if Amaris was better off without her?
All this time, she believed that Regulus Black might be a thorn in the witch's side but at least he had the decency to hide their relationship for her sake. She, on the other hand, always seemed to give her best friend more trouble than it was worth.
.
The Ravenclaw continued to prattle on, frustration evident in her tone and from the way she runs a hand through her brown locks, "I've only had guesses as to why she'd go that far but I don't know why— Point is, when it matters, Amaris never counts on other people."
"Did you know, there was that one time she caught a cold and couldn't visit Hogsmeade? We wouldn't have known if we didn't drop by the Hufflepuff dormitories and asked around," the girl rambled on in order to prove her point.
"Did you know, she never dared to tell me that her housemates refuse to approach her because she's friends with me, an atrocious spawn of those pure-blood bigots?"
"In fact— Did you know, we don't even know something as trivial as her birthday or her favorite color?"
"But, Merlin, she opened up to you. And you don't even know what a bloody miracle that is," she lets out a sigh of exasperation or mortification, whichever it was, neither of them can tell.
.
Pandora Lestrange always believed that Amaris Leclair deserved the world ever since the time she met Mary MacDonald.
Amidst their freshman year, Mary had come waltzing in, claiming to protect the Hufflepuff from the Lestrange's daughter. Too caught up in those malicious rumors and all high on the archetypical Gryffindor savior complex, she had failed to see past Pandora's background and yet, Amaris (bless her soul) didn't hesitate to stand between them to shield the Ravenclaw against such accusations, forcing them to see eye to eye.
Amaris was the first person who didn't see Pandora for her sordid background. She was the reason why the Ravenclaw even had friends in the first place. The Hufflepuff had always protected her in the same way she did when the latter held her wand against Regulus Black—
Because that was just the type of person she was.
Amaris was always the one doing something for them, and yet they could never do the same for her.
It makes them feel like rubbish.
.
Instead of placating the Lestrange girl with empty words, the Slytherin pursed his lips together, acknowledging her actions, "I'm surprised you caught all of those things."
"That's not even half of it," Pandora mumbled, looking at Xenophilius from the corner of her eye as if he provided her with the least bit of assurance.
Her fellow Ravenclaw doesn't dare interrupt their conversation, unsure whether he should even be present to witness such, but he manages to give her an encouraging smile.
It takes another sigh before Pandora confesses, giving in to the thought that maybe the Slytherin was better cut out for it, "You have to watch closely to tell. There are small tics in her gestures that manage to give her away. She might be spacing out more often or smiling too much. She might be talking too often or humming to herself—"
"Impressive, Lestrange."
"Ravenclaw, remember?" she raises her eyebrow as if it was part of their nature to be that keen on observations.
"I'm beginning to think it'd suit you more than Slytherin," Regulus mused. It's the most of a compliment she'll ever manage to ring out of him.
Pandora seemed to accept it with a nonchalant shrug, but neither of them plan to maintain fake niceties.
.
Regulus is the first one who opted to leave. He stuffs his hands in his robes and turns his heel to head towards the door, "Unfortunately, I don't have much time to listen to you complain about your issues with your mates."
He threw a sneer over his shoulder as he added, "Try not to aim your wand at me the next time you see me around."
Pandora shoots Xenophilius a hesitant glance. He seemed to have read her mind because he nudged her in response.
"Black, wait."
.
The boy turns around, an irked expression plastered on his face. Although she certainly felt the same way, she at least had the decency not to express it.
'For Amaris,' Pandora had to remind herself. 'It doesn't matter if I'm the one who's going to help her as long as someone does.'
So, although it was certainly a blow to her pride, she begrudgingly takes a shot at Regulus fucking Black.
"Amaris she… She has a habit of keeping people at arm's length, retreating into her shell…" Pandora warned, "Her smiles are what gives her away. You have to be wary of which—"
"I know," he cuts her off confidently. "I'm not daft, Lestrange. You're not the only one who's been watching her closely."
"I know," she smirks wryly, meeting his gaze evenly as she retorted both mockingly and knowingly, "I caught you doing it a handful of times. If you plan to keep your friendship away from people's eyes, you ought to be a little more discreet about it, yes?"
He refuses to dignify that with an answer.
When the boy walks away without another word, she considers it as her victory.
Later that day, after the Hufflepuff's return to the library, just as they were about to head to their afternoon classes, Xenophilius Lovegood turns to the brooding girl beside him to express the thoughts weighing on his mind— the same words he wasn't able to express.
"Pandora…" he began reluctantly, pursing his lips together to give her a sheepish smile, "I also had the pleasure of meeting Amaris, and just from that, I can assure you, she'd be the last person on earth to even be thinking that."
Before the youngest Lestrange gets the opportunity to speak against such, he continued to prattle on as if he had the capability to read minds, "She chose to stick around."
"But what if—"
"Knowing her, Amaris wouldn't trade any of you for the world. I can see it in the way she cares for all of us," he continued, eyes softening as he met her hazelnut orbs, "I'd like to think, I've also made the right choice of sticking around the lot of you."
She averts her gaze as she huffed petulantly, "You're a sap, Xeno."
"Am I?" He chuckled softly as if he was unaware of it himself.
"That was incredibly sappy…" The Ravenclaw girl mirrors the gentle expression on his face as she reiterated her words to add, "But I have to admit, you also are rather brilliant."