Regina felt sick. She sat outside of the palace, in the gardens, staring up at the moon. When you looked up at the moon, did you think of me too? She bit at her lip. The best days of her life had been those spent out of doors at night, watching the moon, and the stars. So many of those had been spent with Daniel. She shoved those memories aside. You know what you love…now go kill it. No. She would not kill Lynn. She loved her, yes, would do anything for her. But was she what she loved most? It made her dizzy to think about. Lynn was all she had left of Daniel. She loved her. But she was also difficult. Since what happened with her being kidnapped, too, she had become more attached to her, but, at the same time, she was more prone to anger. She was more prone to emotional outbursts. She was a child. That made sense. Regina glanced across the sky. It was so bright, so…piercing. They pierced completely through the darkness. They would not be the same for long.

Lynn. She was her daughter, an extension of herself. The horror of the shattered mirror and the arrow came back to her. Supposedly that meant she was who she hated most, she hated herself more than anyone else. Did that extend to Lynn? She tried not to think about it. She paused. Her thoughts towards her daughter were complicated. That was how a parent was, was it not? She sighed. What she loved most was things being clear, simple. Simply right and simply wrong. Was Lynn that? Could she possibly be that? The wind started to stab around her. The queen wrapped her coat tighter around herself. She had no idea how to disentangle everything. What was happening? What did Rumple mean? Was he trying to manipulate her again? She closed her eyes. That seemed to be his favourite thing. He had tried to manipulate her just in telling her how to fix the curse. He wasn't above anything.

Her eyes snapped open.

There was someone who had always done what she said. There was someone who had always supported her. There was someone who had essentially made their job to defend her. There was someone who had never flinched in doing things she demanded. There was someone who never questioned her more than for a few seconds. There was someone who not only loved her, but had defended, fought, and unquestionably supported her. There was someone who cared about her even when she was cold, and angry towards them. There was someone who had lied for her time and time again. There was someone who kept secrets she did not even ask to be kept. There was someone who had done all of those things for her throughout her entire life. There was someone who did not try to stop her even when they disagreed. There was someone who did anything and everything for her sake, and always had.

Her head started to hurt, and her body shook.

She stood up, swaying on the spot.

She wasn't sure how long it took, but she just about ran into the palace, only slowing her step when she knew she was closer to where she and her daughter shared a room. She was probably still asleep. That would be for the best. She felt like she was in a deep trance. She felt numb. Her entire body felt heavy, and every step she took startled her. It was a miracle, she thought, that it stopped bothering her within no more than a minute. All of it became something of a heavy, dark, painful rhythm. All of it was something of a dream, but a dream that was impossible to break away from. No, she couldn't. She couldn't afford to break away from the state she had fallen into. She tossed off her coat, not caring in the slightest when it slid across the floor instead of one of her guards catching it. She couldn't believe, either, how steadily she was breathing. The only thing that could punctuate around her was the questioning from her mirror. She said nothing. It would -

"Did Rumplestiltskin tell you what you needed to know?"

She paused, her heels clicking and then tapering out. She couldn't do it. She couldn't face him.

"Yes," She finally said, her fingers curling around the balcony. "Yes, he did."

She could hear her father approaching her.

She tried not to think.

"And?"

She hesitated.

It was almost too much.

"I'm not sure I should say."

Was this the answer?

It has to be.

Would it work this way?

It has to.

Was there any alternative?

No. There never would be.

What would happen if it didn't work?

It will. It's all about intent.

Was she lying to herself?

Maybe. But who else had ever done everything and anything she wanted, no matter the cost, and without more than brief question?

Would things ever be the same?

Of course not. They aren't supposed to be.

Would the new life be worth it?

It has to. The world will be one of my design. Whatever that design is.

Could she do this?

Yes. She had to be capable.

Was it possible the curse was meant to not work?

If that's true, I'll kill Rumple with my bare hands, and if Snow and her husband think that's worth killing me for, then they'll have lost their minds even worse than they already have.

Would this bring everything back to when it all seemed perfect?

Yes. That's the purpose of all of this.

Would all of it be worth it?

Yes. Justice. It's justice.

Would the dust settle afterwards?

It will. It must.

Would life be worth living like that?

I've done worse.

Would she be able to do it quickly enough to not prolong it?

Yes. I've done it to plenty of people before.

Was this all she needed to finally have everything?

It will ensure the curse works. That's what has to be done for me to get everything back.

Would the reclaiming of power further ensure her victory?

Absolutely.

Could the life she wanted be ensured?

Yes! Stop hesitating, that's the entire point of the curse!

Would there be more there than could ever be left here?

It has to…and maybe even new love.

Was the blonde woman real? Was she on that other side?

That's all I can hope for. Who is she?

Would the difference in the world be too much?

Of course not. That can't be.

Were there any alternatives?

Not without risking my own life.

Would this kill Snow?

I don't care if it kills her or not. If it makes her suffer, that's more than enough.

Was this the end of any good in her?

That died a long time ago. Whomever that woman was, she has not been alive in ages.

Could she do this?

Yes, I -

"Regina?" Her father spoke again, taking a small step back when she suddenly turned around. "Regina, are you alright?"

She sighed, letting her hands go from around the balcony. Then, she started to pace across the room, her hands shaking wildly.

"I'm conflicted."

"How bad is it?" He tried to reassuringly pat her arm, but she was too quick. "Maybe I can help."

Regina almost slipped, and instead pulled her shoes off, and pitched them off the balcony.

"I have to cut out…" She glanced towards the mirror. "The heart of thing I love most."

Horror briefly fell across Henry's face, but it turned to disbelief when he realised his daughter was doing everything possible to not meet his eyes.

"Me…" He got out.

Regina caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror, and brushed tears away from her eyes.

"Daddy," She spoke quietly. "I don't know what to do."

Henry watched her closely. He almost could not believe her. For just a moment, she looked both exactly like her mother and nothing like her.

"My dear, please," He eventually said. "You don't have to do this."

Regina closed her eyes briefly, them only fluttering open and flicking away tears when she started to pace again. She barely reacted when she heard her father follow her.

"I have to do something."

"Then move past this," He said, lowering his voice when she entered the room she shared with her daughter, who was still asleep. It was almost dawn. She would wake up soon. "I know this may sound self, serving," He spoke quietly when she paused in front of the mirror. "But you don't have to enact the curse."

She finally found it in her to face her father.

"But I can't keep living like this!" She brushed the tears away from her eyes. "What Snow did to me, what she took from me…it's eating me alive, daddy. Her very existence mocks me! She must be punished!"

"Regina," Henry said, surprised by his own calmness. "If the price is a hole that will never be filled, then why do it? Stop worrying about Snow white, and stop over. We can have a new life."

Regina shook her head. "But what kind of life? All I've worked for, all I've built…it'll be gone. My power will disappear…they already think I'm nothing."

"Power is seductive, but so is love," He embraced her much as he had when she was a child. "And you can have that again. You've said yourself you want to find love with the woman you've had visions of. I have no doubt you can find her."

Regina felt her voice shake while she struggled to speak.

"I just," She whispered. "I just want to be happy."

"You can be," He reminded her, pausing when he realised she was silently crying. "Of that, I'm sure. I believe, given the chance, we can find happiness together. But the choice is yours."

Regina took a small step back. "I think you're right," She trembled. "I can be happy."

"You're a good person," Henry said with a slight sigh. "You'll find the world will -"

She could not - would not - let herself hear more. She could not hesitate.

"Just not here," She was not sure she spoke, but she was sure that she ripped out his heart. She took a step back when he fell to the ground. Dead. She knew she was still crying. She stared down at the heart in her hand. "I'm sorry…" She whispered. "I'm sorry…"

There was a dark grey, silk bag on the table by the mirror. She shakily slipped the heart into it. Tied it shut.

She was not sure how she managed it, but she found it in her to move her father.

Took him to the forest.

Buried him.

Placed a black rose on his grave.

She was not sure how long anything took, either.

She woke up Lynn.

Walked to the place in the forest to cast the curse with her, and their friends.

She dropped her father's heart into the flames.

The smoke and fire and flames grew higher.

It worked.

It subsumed everything.

She held onto her daughter, never more grateful for how much like her, how difficult she could be.

Then, the world went dark, just like falling into a deep sleep…

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Authour's Note: i know it goes without saying, but the next chapter is Storybrooke! thanks so much for reading this so far, and for all the feedback! it means more than i can ever express!

barrattajennifer: i have to agree. they're not necessarily bad people, and they usually have good intentions, but Emma definitely would have been a lot…odder if she had been raised by her birth parents.

jasouatfan: Rumple is the master of manipulation; it's no wonder he was startled by Regina refusing to give into him for something. and, yes, Lynn and Regina's relationship will be vastly different going forward, all things considered.

Sammii16: i had the same thought, for a long time, but i hope this clears up any confusion. it's an interesting dynamic, for sure, so, like i said, i hope this ultimately makes sense.