CPOV
"I love you baby" I whispered, seeing her face above me, her beautiful smile lighting up the room. "Ana, you're my forever, don't ever forget that."
"Never" she giggled. "You're stuck with me forever too, now behave and keep still Christian, it's time for my fun."
I closed my eyes, feeling her lips all over my body before she took my cock into her mouth. I had to fight my body from bucking, fight the loud moans from leaving my lips as this was her bedroom we were in, not mine.
Her parents had been out when we had arrived here but I don't know how long we had been in her bedroom, exploring each other's bodies so they could be home by now.
Feeling her mouth on me was one thing but as she hovered over me, teasing me as her pussy brushed against my cock, before then dropping down until I was balls deep inside her, the feelings of pleasure increased a hundredfold.
I fought to keep my eyes open as Ana rode me, fought to let Ana lead and not take over, wanting to flip her onto her back and fuck her hard. Instead, I let her bring us to a very happy conclusion, one I savoured every second of until that blasted alarm went off.
"For fuck's sake" I groaned, upon being forcefully woken up.
My heart felt like it was thumping out of my chest, my whole body shaking. Was it because of the incessant racket that woke me every morning or was it because of the dream I'd been having, one I realise now had caused me to cum in my pants.
Despite the mess I was now in, I didn't want to get up, I wanted to lay here, thinking of Ana, memorising every detail of her face. If I didn't do that every single day, I feared I would forget.
I never wanted to find myself here at Washington State Penitentiary. I thought moving to Montesano and meeting Ana, my life would take a different turn. I suppose Carrick was right, Elliot and I, we deserve to be locked up, only my brother isn't, he's free, a long way away from here.
"Another day, another day of nothing but the same old shit" I heard above me before Jason looked down on me from the top bunk. "Morning."
"Morning" I groaned. "You looking forward to Friday."
"No," was his immediate reply. "I have lots of opportunities waiting for me out there," he said sarcastically.
"You do Jason, you just don't see it yet."
"Maybe but I know one thing for sure, I'm not going back to the job" he stated, jumping down from the bunk before banging on the door.
"Give me a minute" Guard Lowe shouted, opening the door a few minutes later.
"If you're going to wake us up with that infernal racket, the least you can do is be on time to let us out" Jason smiled at our favourite guard.
"Get out then," she said. "Behave yourself, boys, you'll be out of here soon and I don't want to see either of you back."
"I promise, I'm never coming back here when I get out" I stated and I had never said anything more truthful other than when I had told Ana that I loved her.
Thinking her name, remembering her face brought an ache to my chest. We should've never been parted in the first place. If only I had kept in touch with her, let her in instead of wallowing in self-pity and allowing the guilt to consume me. If only, all those years ago I had told her the truth.
Leaving our cell, Jason and I went to the bathrooms to wash up before we headed for the food hall, ignoring the snide remarks on the way. It was a dog eat dog world in here and as Philips turned in our direction, the con most in here feared, I knew backing down would just show we were fearful of him and others who think they ruled this place.
So we carried on walking, stopping right in front of Philips, showing him and others no fear. It was he who moved out of the way when Guard Booth and two others came into the room but not before I was called the name, one, ever since I had accepted without question Jason as my cellmate, cop fucker.
"Problem here," Booth asked.
"No problem sir" Philips replied. "I was just letting Taylor know that when he's released he needn't worry about Grey because we'll protect him."
"No thanks," I replied, calling Philips out on his lies. "I'll look after myself."
I could tell Philips was pissed but he didn't say anything as Jason and I took a tray each that was soon filled with what they called food and found a table away from the others.
Jason and I didn't say anything while we ate, we didn't need to as words had already been said in the privacy of our cell. He was worried, worried that upon his release I would be alone, at the mercy of the guards, most of who were likely to turn a blind eye should a fight break out with someone they disliked.
I've never caused any problems here, I keep to myself, making very few friends. I had the respect of some for standing up to Philips but I know those, should a fight break out, they would not help me out. Only Jason would wade in and have my back but not for much longer.
….
"28, 29, 30, you going for more" Jason asked, standing behind me as I did chin-ups on the bar after lunch.
My morning had been in the one place that made staying here bearable, the garage. There, just like I had done on my Saturday job when I was a kid, I honed my skills as a mechanic feeling now that no matter what vehicle was put in front of me, I could fix it. Being in a farming area, tractors and other farm machinery were what I fixed the most.
"No, I'll spot you" I replied dropping down from the bar as he lay down on the bench before I lifted the weights into place.
I ignored the sun that beat down on us, counting how many times Jason lifted the bar. For the briefest of seconds, I looked around me too, making sure we were both safe and that neither Philips nor one of his cronies were close.
"Grey, visitor" Booth shouted, his booming voice so loud I could hear him across the prison yard.
"Sir" I called back, knowing Booth's big mouth and my one word reply had the attention of many here. It was not visiting time yet so I know and I was right as I was called "guards pussy" amongst other things, that many here thought I was getting extra privileges they were not.
Taking the weights from Jason before putting them back into place, I started to walk over towards Booth with Jason by my side. The attention from us most here craved, the need to cause drama, to say we had caused it should we retaliate was ignored as we crossed the prison yard.
"I don't remember calling your name Taylor" Booth spat.
"I'd like to go back to my cell. I'm feeling a little unwell, sunstroke I think, Sir" he replied, the last word said with disdain. "I have a class this afternoon, my final one so I don't want to miss it. I'm hoping that by getting some water and staying somewhere cooler, darker, I will feel better when it's time to go."
"And on the bench press?" he challenged. "I was watching, you were fine doing that."
"I wasn't sir but you know what this place is like. Should I have done nothing out there, stood around when I'm usually working out, it would be seen as weakness by others, that something was wrong with me."
"Get in" he grumbled.
As we were both allowed to enter the building, Jason went his way and I went mine.
"Sir," I said, hating that word. "Visiting time is later this afternoon and I've never had anyone on my list so there is no one to visit me."
Booth ignored my comment as he led me through the food hall, through two sets of gates and the corridors that they were attached to, each gate banging closed behind me. Only when he stopped outside of a room did he finally speak to me.
"Your lawyer is here. He obviously doesn't need an appointment after seeing how pally he was with the warden when he arrived."
"Lawyer, I haven't…. No, if you mean him, I'll go back to my cell."
"Get in there" he barked, pointing into the room where a man I hated now stood.
Do I kick off in front of him, no that will just convince him that he was right about me all along? So I walked into the room, taking a seat before my so-called father could turn around and witness me being handcuffed to the table. With Booth being asked to leave, his position now outside the door looking in, it was now just him and me.
"Christian," he said, walking towards the table before taking a seat on the other side.
"Carrick" I replied, as this man was no father to me.
"I have come to speak to you about your release next month and your intentions thereafter… Your mother would like to know."
"My mother" I laughed. "My mother killed herself when I was four years old."
I watched as he shook his head, the look in his eyes making any lesser man wither. I had spent too much time over the years being the recipient of that look, of hearing his vicious tongue. I wasn't that boy, that young man that he could bully anymore.
"Your mother is worried."
"Funny, for someone you say that is worried, she's never been a visitor here. You only come when you want something so why don't you do us both a favour and leave."
"Christian" he seethed, getting angry and despite what I said to him, he got no anger from me. Not outside anyway, inside, I wanted to knock him through the wall.
"I plan to come to Seattle, tell the world all about the real Carrick and Grace Grey. Not the facade that you put on as the perfect couple, the one even some in here have heard of, even mocked. Mack, you would probably have met someone similar to him at some point. He was talking about her actually after seeing you both on TV, about how he wanted to make her scream all night long before slitting her throat when the sun came up. You meet such lovely people in here... He mentioned the charity ball that you attended all to raise money for the children's hospital where she works. He asked if I knew you, sharing the same surname and all, I told him no, that my parents were dead... A loving couple with so much love for others you portray, it's such a shame that that woman you think of as my mother and yourself didn't care for those you adopted in the same way."
"If you" he seethed.
"If I what, tell the truth. You wouldn't know what the hell that was."
"Christian, I could cause a lot of trouble for you, make your stay in here a lot longer" he spat, his body shaking in anger.
"Really, what are you going to say about your visit today then, that I got angry, that I hit you and you don't feel that I should be let out. Go ahead, but you should know there are camera's in every one of these rooms and after telling my favourite guard" I said looking to Booth. "That I didn't feel safe around you, I asked him to record this whole session" I lied.
"You what," he asked, looking to the small window in the door where Booth looked stonefaced back at him.
He may think that Booth had heard everything, that his cover here today as my lawyer is blown and not the bastard father who wanted to know my future movements. What he doesn't know is that's Booth's usual look.
"You want to know my intentions after I've ruined your life, Carrick. I intend to go home, back to Montesano to the only home I've ever known."
"To her, Anastasia," he asked, disgust filling his voice. I wanted… I wanted to jump over the table, to hurt him as much as he had hurt me. I wouldn't give him that, in fact, I gave him nothing else, not one more word before he walked away.
I walked in silence back to my cell, not even saying a word when I passed Jason who was on his way to class. Once there, I climbed onto my bed.
Reaching under my pillow, I pulled out the only photo of Ana that I had left. It had been in my wallet that night but I had taken it out at the bar. It had only been found out about when I had been told to change, having been hidden in an inside pocket of my jeans. The guard that had seen it tightly grasped in my hand so they couldn't take it from me had held his hand out for it. I wanted to fight him, terrified that he would take it away but looking at it, telling me she was a beautiful girl, I think he knew I was in such a fragile state of mind that he gave it back to me. Had it been the man who had shown me, pushed me more like into a cell that first night, I know he was the type of man who would have taken pleasure in destroying it.
This photo of my Ana was the only treasure I had left in the world.
….
When Jason went to dinner that night, despite feeling guilty that he was on his own, I stayed in the cell, my appetite having left me the moment Booth had shouted my name. I had said previously that I didn't want any visits at all from Carrick Grey or anyone else that I knew. Obviously, in here I had no right to refuse anything, they called the shots not me.
"I miss you baby" I whispered, placing a kiss on the photo before closing my eyes, craving sleep. Twenty-seven days I had left until I was out of here and if I could sleep through all of them then that is what I wanted to do, sleep, or if not, keep as busy as I can when I'm not locked in here and survive the rest of my time.
…
"Can I ask you something?" Jason asked the night before he was to be released. We were locked up now, lights out coming very soon but despite trying, I couldn't sleep.
"Sure, ask away."
"Your girl, why did you never call her, tell her where you were."
I sighed hearing his question, the guilt of what I'd done eating me up inside. A few minutes later is when I'd answered him when all the words were right in my mind.
"I thought it would be better for her, to let her go."
"That's bullshit" he replied, shocking me as it was the first time he'd spoken like that to me. "You call her name in your sleep, did you know that. You sometimes cry out for her, did you know that too" he asked, looking down at me from the top bunk.
"Just because I said goodbye doesn't mean that it doesn't hurt. Anastasia was the only light in my life."
"And yet you let her go," he said, stating the truth as he lay back down on his bunk.
"Ana, she was so beautiful, she was the only person I've ever loved."
"Was, you speak about her as if she's in the past."
"Isn't she. I'm going back to Montesano when I leave here Jason but I don't expect Ana to have waited for me especially when I disappeared off the face of the earth…. I never told her, told her why we'd moved there in the first place, she just thought it was because Grace had taken the job of doctor there. In truth, they wanted to move us away from Detroit because of the trouble we were getting in…. Elliot, he was in and out of the police precinct, one step away from a stint in jail. Me being the naive younger brother followed his lead as he's the only real family I've ever had. Elliot protected me when I was little from Carrick's anger, he would do something, antagonise him just to get the focus away from me. I felt I owed my brother a debt so I did whatever he asked me to do."
"Would you do it again now, go to him that night knowing what the outcome would be?" he asked, as I brushed away the silent tears that fell.
"I can't answer that…. I don't know."
"Are you sure about that?" he asked, pushing me to answer the question he had asked before but got no answer to.
"No" I finally answered truthfully. "Had I known what was going to happen I would've ignored the call, stayed there wrapped in a blanket with Ana and let my brother for once deal with his problems on his own. I would've supported him after, done whatever I could to help but I know it would've been him in here instead of me."
I can't change the past but I can look to the future. I just hope when I reach Montesano a future is there waiting for me because, without the only place I've ever called home and the people who had welcomed me there, I have nothing.
What I received a couple of days later, a package no doubt from Carrick that contained photos of my girl stating that she had moved on and to stay away, made me more determined than ever to go home.
Thank you for reading and for all your lovely reviews for the first chapter.
I know a lot of you will want to know what happened that night but I thought I would let you learn that when Ana does.
Until next time, take care.
Caroline.