I don't own or profit from Oregairu
Author comments at the end, but let me say this:
Johari's window is so fucking stupid to work with in high school level dipshit kids, I literally wrote Yukino's monologue about schoolwork last chapter just to live it in the flesh a week later, at least I should do something good out of it. xd
This chapter is almost entirely OC, so far the story has more or less been following the novels in chronology, but I have no creativity to make something cool out of the sports festival, so plead put up with my larping as an expert. It turned out a little bit Angsty.
Gaze through Johari's window and you'll see fire
Hachiman POV:
Memento Mori: Remember that you are going to die
A phrase that reminds us of the whimsicality of our stay in the mortal plain. a phrase that puts an ambiguous end for all roads which make human life, the beauty and terror of certainty and uncertainty, knowing it'll happen, but in most cases not having any idea whatsoever on how or when.
Normies tend to interpret such a phrase as rash decisions and carefree attitude towards life, a naive way to cope with the black darkness that is uncertainty. Essentially the concept behind 'memento mori' is widely interpreted as a philosophical way of saying 'fuck it.'
This way of thinking has survived a long time, from the first I read of such a thing I learnt it had its origin in ancient Rome, knowledge of the Sabines. Well the damn thing has survived, some years ago the Americans came up with a silly acronym. Not long until you had idiots placing `#YOLO' in every single post on the internet. (It was a long time ago, Social media is a wasteland I have no desire to return to) and Ikebukuro sunshine was filled with T-shirts with prints saying 'ヨロ' with the english typography for 'You Only Live Once' below.
What a retarded way to go about things.
In deep analysis of the normie behavior and brain, you would think that these two phrases are connected with dauntless situations which are automatically going to end well. But to me what comes to mind is the dialogue from that old movie Rocky 4, after the Russian guy beats the lights out of the black guy he says 'If he dies, he dies.' When people think 'If I die, I die' it encourages the guy on a diet to eat that greasy calorie bomb. Source: Zaimokuza. Or the creepy pariah to confess to the extroverted girl. Source: Me.
Were we rewarded for being stupidly bold? No, we regretted it and we felt stupid afterwards.
I am a firm believer of the idea that if you fuck up you can only stomach it and carry on with your luggage. What-ifs are shallow delusions, or well another way of coping with things.
"That's the guy who tried to blackmail Yukinoshita" I hear some snickers coming from my surroundings as I arrive at the bike rack
Ugh, now I remember why I was so entranced thinking about stupid things like regrets, alternate dimensions and coping.
I'm not even going to bother thinking about if I should or shouldn't have lied about coercing Yukinoshita into… petting my head? I don't know what I confessed doing, it's something that bitch Sagami made up as her own way of coping.
What I'm pondering about right now is that. I like Yukinoshita, and that's not rhetorical.
I already had my fair share of meditation with the usual doubts of 'Do I really like her?' and good old denial. But unlike having to deal with external feelings like, say the very legitimate doubts about Yuigahama liking me. I have to be real with myself, I like Yukinoshita.
And what my recent past Hachiman in denial, or better said suspicious Hachiman was wary of is that I only projected some concerning thoughts based on Yukinoshita's physical attractiveness and her impressive intellect. At most repeating my Orimoto mistake by looking up at something deeper to something superficial and tangible which was our usual banter and discussions.
Everybody can agree with me that Yukinoshita is gorgeous, or that her voice is soothing and elegant, or that her legs are mesmerizing and…
Wrong point to make. Objectively correct, but I was not heading there. Bad Hachiman!
Right, her voice. Well with that voice I heard something that I've been repeating in my head over and over again.
"Hikigaya-kun. I don't know what to tell you, I thought I knew you at least a little bit, but now I know you better."
Hearing that stung. Yet I couldn't really do much more than sighing, stomaching it and carrying on with my luggage.
To even have the right to think I like Yukinoshita, there is zero room to think about a 'what would have happened if I didn't act the way I acted?' Because the answer would be that she wouldn't have come to know me better, staying on that tangible superficial bond to project delusions and assumptions onto.
Yukinoshita came a little closer to seeing what I am, and she didn't like what she found, reassuring to myself that the 'desire' Haruno speaks of is bound to crashing and burning or dissipating to time.
That's a bitter way to see it, but objectivity is lost with wishful thinking and some more coping. I'd have to be very high on copium to think otherwise. This is what I got. This is what I am. This is what it is.
Putting a mental bookmark on this train of thought I dismount my bike and lock it. Pull out some earphones.
Now Playing-Re:Re. Asian Kung-Fu Generation
"...it is among the most commonly used methods in Communication Theory, usually used in self-help groups."
Ahh Human development Class, the professor that hates his job and constantly talks about cool topics to discuss, not to work on. In fact, not even to discuss, as if these normies could comprehend the most basic tldr'd lecture on psychology, let alone philosophy. They're required to stop their unstoppable youth rush and ponder for a second? Unthinkable! Literally.
Boy, did I enjoyed actually falling asleep instead of pretending the day he asked us to answer in our own words what we think 'Philosophy' means and made everyone read their answer out loud. That's generic class content 101 in the books of professors that don't really get excited about their job, I get that, but please understand that it's also painful on our side.
But I get you Dipshit-sensei-san! That's right, a double honorific for you! You are among the many fallen believers in the theory of unemployment that was forced by this cruel world to abandon your principles. I salute you my comrade.
Holy fuck that was some repressed Zaimokuza speech if I ever had one, let's see what today's torture session has in store.
"For this activity you'll be working in teams of three, got it?"
Impressive, first sentence and I already lament not being rolled over by Yukinoshita's car.
"...right, so the teams go as follows."
Man, already shuffled? I can't even play the 'Seems like I got no pair/team for this activity, whoops. Guess I'll work alone' while deliberately stalling in the time of choosing teams. Unless you can't get ignored it's easy to dread choosing teams. Even someone like Kawa… like Mitsubishi can just pretend to be discerning the firmament itself by gazing at the window, and that is it. By the time the sensei asks you who you're with you play dumb and say you work better this way.
Of course I have the privilege of skipping those steps since no one considered me in the first place, but I do wonder how Yukinoshita manages with everyone wanting to be her teammate but no one actually suggesting it in fear of the imminent crap talk.
"The first team will be formed by Hyodo… Totsuka… and"
AND?...
"Kawasaki."
Shame.
"Next team is formed by Yuigahama…. Hasegawa… and Sagami"
"Tobe… Ooka… Yamato."
My head hurts just by imagining what the stooges will come up with
"Alright, next team!" The tired professor gets back the attention of the class after people started talking.
"Hikigaya…." that is me.
"Miura…" Oh, of course. I forgot the Romcom Gods sometimes take a break and are subbed by some sadistic entity hellbent in making me yield
I don't even need to turn towards her to know the queen bee is already seething in disgust.
"And…. Hayama."
…
Sigh
No, this was the Romcom God's doing, but they remembered I'm a background character that doesn't get named.
"Damn, Miura-san and Hayama-kun got unlucky."
"That's the creepy guy who was harassing Yukinoshita?"
"I heard he isn't like that, some people in the committee didn't think he would do that, but I mean, look at him, he looks like he wants to beat everyone up, I wouldn't be so sure he's clean."
"Yeah, he's also the guy who lost his shit while screaming at children, he must be an actual piece of shit to do that and then manipulate Yukinoshita"
Damn, Sagami got me good, I never really cared about my standing in the social ladder, but being branded a predator isn't something to skip your steps about.
"Enough" a stern voice shuts the others and makes everyone turn towards the speaker
"Hikitani might be troublesome, but he didn't do that." Hayama says firmly
Uhhh, why are you defending me? Why are you taking such a-
"How can you be sure Hayama-kun?"
"Yeah, the guy has the history of two scummy events, are you trying to tell us something Hayama-kun?
Is he threatening you too?"
…Risk.
"Holy shit this guy is trash."
"I wish Yamato had landed some more blows on him, his nose looks a little too straight for my taste."
Well, thanks a lot Hayama, you are my hero.
As the teacher seems mildly amused with this commotion, he still opts to wash his hands and decide that it's not his problem to deal with.
Hey… Teach'
I mean, I can dig that, I would do the same if I was in his position, but still, dick move.
"Tell us Hayato kun! Did he threaten you or not? Or are you perhaps so nice that you even look up to defending someone like him, you're such a great guy!" Sagami says, I can almost see her licking her lips at the prospect of payback.
Ok, even I feel a little bit overwhelmed now, it's like apart from Tobe, Kawasaki, Totsuka and apparently Hayama, the entire mass is demanding my blood. This isn't new to me, but in middle school I rarely got threatened with physical violence, having people remark with sorrow that my face isn't a bloody pulp is a bit unnerving.
So much for passing by unnoticed and minding my own business. As fellow japanese countrymen and schoolmates of a supposedly prestigious school I should be fine, but this hostile air everyone is showing me makes me wonder if I'll have to pedal faster from now on.
"Well.." Hayama starts
"Well?"
He looks at me "Did you do it Hikigaya?"
I close my eyes "I did."
Audible gasps came from here and there.
I plead guilty, what will be the verdict? I had already accepted ostracism as a lifestyle before I could even be judged, but what happens now? Will I be hanged or forced to commit harakiri? Will Cillian Murphy sentence me to death… by exile? Or will it be a fight to the death with knives.
Fucking hell, I'm about to be punished and here I am thinking of dumbass references, welp, let's open my eyes and see my executioners.
"See? What did I tell you? This guy is pure trash, the scoundrel didn't even hesitate to say yes." Sagami says to someone beside her
The door opens suddenly, startling much of the class. Even the most neutral ones who never engaged in the usual affairs of the jungle (I should be among them) were at the edge of their seats awaiting to know what was to be 'Hikitani-kun's fate'. Did I just get Deus ex machina'd?
"Alright that's it Hikigaya." A serious Hiratsuka-sensei comes in
"Sensei?" I and a couple others ask at the same time and she puts her fingers to the bridge of her nose.
"While I agree with Sagami that Hikigaya is a shameless scoundrel, it really isn't like what you are all saying, Hikigaya didn't do anything of what you are accusing him of."
I would see Hiratsuka as my shining armor prince and think of something implying I'll eventually marry her, but it's no use. The damage is done. If she overheard everything from behind the door before announcing something or calling someone to her office she heard I declared myself the perpetrator. Normally it wouldn't take as much for the crowds to mob on someone that hasn't been proven guilty. I note again how even the quiet and reserved were flowing with the class brainwave that yearned for retribution upon me.
That's the tyranny of the masses in function, people usually just jump onto a rumor, distort it, milk it and spread it. But I can't blame it on herd mentality this time. by taking the blame I validated my detractors, my lynching would be justified.
Remember what that commie, I think he was called Erich, the guy who wrote 'heart of man'. Well,that guy. He said something about ordinary men holding extraordinary power was a bigger threat than malicious men. That's precisely it. Sagami, who is clearly carrying a grudge against me, can scream and talk crap about me all she wants, and most would believe her, heck, that started this mess in the first place. But people who saw how we worked in the committee didn't buy her shit, even Shiromeguri-senpai with her megu megu megurin power could not hide the sun with her fingertip.
Sagami was incompetent and a fraud, and the committee took notice,Yukinoshita and I made sure of it. Some people who had friends on board were skeptical of the idea of me forcing Yukinoshita to do things she didn't want to. But if I admitted it it would wreck any credibility or sympathy individuals could have towards me, it's not something I'm proud of, but this would be the smoothest road to walk.
"But Sensei, he literally admitted to doing so."
"Oh yeah? Who here saw it happen?"
Sagami tenses "I-I did"
Hiratsuka groans "Honestly Hikigaya, if it wasn't for me and a certain someone arriving at the last possible second you'd be in some pretty deep…manure."
Hai?
And honestly Sensei, there's no point in holding your tongue back, I think I was just insulted with every single jeer and hateful word existent in the Japanese language, all in earshot of the teacher who is currently… playing project diva in a Vita just like the one I played with some years ago. Goddamn this guy is like a future reflection of myself.
"Certain someone? And what do you mean Sensei?" Hayama asks with a soft tone adequate to mediate the usual normie quarrels.
"Heh, you brats may buy the crap Hikigaya says to cover something, usually himself, but sometimes he lies with better motives, like this time but the idiot can't fool me. Much less her."
…Huh
"Furthermore, Sagami. Legally, I can't say to you the same thing that Hikigaya said to you, but this is some low thing you are doing, just know it."
"w-w what do you m" The cocky redhead starts stammering before being cut off
"While Hiratsuka-Sensei may be legally and morally compelled to talk nice to you Sagami-san. I am not." Yukinoshita enters 2-F, whatever activity they are currently doing in the international curriculum class must be either free hour or Yukinoshita has the warhammer titan.
"Shit, who knows what's happening but this just got interesting." The teacher mutters in a low voice
"Yukino..
Yukinon..
The smartass princess…" Hayama, Yuigahama and Miura narrate what they see
"In fact, I believe I have already done it twice before, and believe me. The saying that there's joy in repetition doesn't apply in this case. But I cannot stand people who fabricate slanders out of spite and spread it like wildfire. It's unforgivable."
"Lies?! You bi-. Do you have Rome syndrome or something? I literally caught a pervert blackmailing you and you come here to insult ME?"
Hayama grits his teeth and the temperature seems to get lower.
"Is that so? Then could you please remind me what were Hikigaya-kun's words and what he threatened me with? Because not only STOCKHOLM syndrome, I must have also developed amnesia. I don't remember it."
You know, I feel like a sack of shit right now. By some apparently logical decision I took in the moment I ended up burdening her more and I can't open my mouth right now.
To complement it, she's being surprisingly tame…
'Sh-she says I need to be more assertive and less aggressive when approached, according to her my honesty and bluntness is not a problem but my 'insistence on keeping everyone away' is something I will regret later on, she thinks I solve matters with only the perspective of solving a problem immediately with no care for what the collateral damage or consequences might be.'
...I am actually guilty.
I acted in a way that never took into account the collateral damage and would only immediately deflect the negatives. I don't give a flying fuck about what happens to me or my reputation. But did I ever stop to think what would happen to her with that lie?
Of course, everything branded Hikigaya Hachiman would be tainted. I am the president of the Service Club and she's the only other member. That would sink her name to the midnight zone, essentially disabling any reason to disprove I 'coerced her' into doing something that didn't happen.
But look at her, actually solving a problem while taking her own request into consideration. She could have destroyed Sagami there and then by calling her a retard for not knowing the correct disability and for lying, but instead she's taking her time, to completely burrow the lie and countering the rumor with her version.
I…I don't deserve this.
"... of course after he exposed the joke of management you had been showing until that point, you were bound to see it as the murder of a family member. As harsh as that rascal was with you, he was exercising the de facto motto of the Service Club. To not give a fish to the hungry, instead teaching you how to fish."
"THAT ASSHOLE DIDN'T DO THAT."
Correct, I didn't do that Yukinoshita. Please stop praising me or defending me.
"I will give you that one, I don't believe even he looked at it that way. He probably was just fed up with the sheer incompetence and stagnation. After seeing your proposal for a slogan I was close to also exploding on you.
But even if he didn't plan it. You will not forget that experience, you are proving it right now. If you ever opt to take in another administrative experience in the future, his dead eyes will come back to you, and the points he mentioned will make you not repeat the same mistakes.
If anything, I think he actually completed your request with that scolding he gave you. I said we rescinded it, but you asked for 'a little push' in order to achieve growth and experience. Hikigaya-kun overdid it and gave you a good shove."
"Hiratsuka-sensei, I loathe to say this, but that's one point for Hikigaya-kun in our bet." she turns towards Hiratsuka who is leaning her back in the wall
Ultra Competitive Yukinoshita, the girl disgusted by what she found a meter deeper to my person just forfeited a point to me, and is ironically saving me while also saving the club's reputation and her own.
While I am awestruck at this demon superwoman standing in the middle of my classroom. The thought of how independent and strong she is, is…so attractive. Not to mention that little thing she always does with her hair tossed behind her right ear is now making me blush…
no, no NO. Go back on track Hachiman. You are a sack of shit and you just burdened and troubled someone dear to you.
"Don't give me that shit BITCH!" Sagami yells in pure rage, even startling Miura, who is quick to lash out her tongue towards the peasants. I feel some anger rising within me.
"That piece of shit has been treating you like a wh-" she stops herself "I mean. What about the second day?! He literally begged you to stay in a seat beside him, how can you tell me that's not acting of a predator?!"
A cornered animal, pulling out everything in her arsenal to not die alone. Yet again, my dumbassery enabled this chance for her to take.
"I see, you saw something like that and took it to yourself to fill in the blanks. I know from experience what it's like to not be given a chance to defend yourself. The only course of action to take is to submit yourself. I cannot let that happen again." She turns to me
"Hikigaya-kun, did you or did you not ask me to stay aside you with hidden perverted motives?"
I wanted to confirm if I actually wanted to be with you… but not once did I think of harming you, that is for certain.
"I did not." I say clearly but with my gaze downwards.
"I see. Even if your focus theory was masochistic or colossally stupid in its own way, I believe your words Hikigaya-kun. I'm sure the committee members will also vouch for your innocence."
When did Human development hour turned into Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney? Are greeks gypsies? Is soup a drink?
"So he is. Hikigaya must have had his reasons to take the blame, but all of you should know better than to not question why or even if the rumor in question was true."
As Hiratsuka-sensei was ranting and making up shit that made me seem a lot more heroic than what my little move was, I noticed Yukinoshita turn around and leave.
I wanted to follow her and apologize, but that wouldn't do anything. Even if I didn't go in pursuit of those two ocean blue marbles that stared at me in a poker face, I still had to leave this classroom as soon as possible. I wasn't out of air nor did my blood pressure spike, but it still felt suffocating and trapped.
Hiratsuka-sensei not so inconspicuously told me to meet her in her office later and dismissed me, I bowed half assedly and left that asphyxiating room.
Ah, I have my phone with me, I thought I left it back in the classroom. Shit, I didn't bring my earphones… there's not much to do with this if I can't listen to music.
I can always put the speaker close to my ear and play it in a low volume, I have to wait for Hiratsuka-sensei anyways, and I already spaced out plenty, in fact, I'm very conscious about my own thinking since that weak display of nothing from me when those two saved me.
Heh, Self Conscious thinking about thinking itself, that's like making meta jokes about the meta of a topic. I left RE:RE half listened.
play
I Wanted to tell you to hold on to
Times spent under the overpass, fleeting days
That I have such regrets—words I couldn't voice that day
There were times when we connected
Brought together emotions that wouldn't untangle
That was my everything
And I lost it all, just now
"."
"Good taste, if this were the last day and you put Rewrite, I'd give you permission to blast it in the sound system in which we call people and use in earthquakes early warnings."
The accustomed voice of my favorite teacher (not that I will say that) makes me slightly jump in surprise
"Sensei"
"Come inside Hikigaya." She leads the way into the faculty building and her office
"."
"."
The mature woman grabs a cigarrette from her purse and hold it in her fingers but doesn't ignite it.
"Quick exercise Hikigaya."
"Huh?"
"You're by far the most skilled in Japanese literature and language in 2-F, only outclassed by Hayama who doesn't get points deducted for writing outrageous stuff."
"I am aware, Yukinoshita tends to remind me I'm below her."
"Ah, that Yukinoshita lass. Quite the show she put on for you earlier didn't she?"
I visually cringe
"Yeah, I get why you'd feel that way, anyhow. Exercise."
"Yeah?"
"In a few or many words, think of a title to describe your situation."
"Situation?"
"Yeah, this whole ordeal, whatever's happening with ya kid."
"Hachi-kun can't communicate."
"You're not that cute, think of something else."
Aw fuck, being born in the Komi family would be the dream but not worth losing Komachi.
"I don't know what to say, I can only hand you light novel and manga rip-off titles."
"I'll pummel you if you don't come up with something."
Geh
"You know, I always wondered why that friend of yours calls you 'his comrade'."
I froze at the mention of Zaimokuza and the implications of Hiratsuka having this knowledge.
"When Yukinoshita was fresh in Service Club she informed me of this. say, were you Chūnibyō in the past?"
"Uhhh… it's not like that.. I just… that was… ok, yes. I was, WAS a deluded dumbass."
That's why I cannot think of an original title for this mess, or better said, I don't want to. I could cogitate some sucker allegory or metaphor, but one of the main focuses of being a logician is to see things for what they are, not romanticize them.
I mean sure, I have a schizo ongoing joke about the Romcom gods, but that's just because some of m my predicaments are outright ridiculous.
"How about you bring out your inner deluded dumbass for a bit?"
"Sensei, what is the point of this?"
"No point, but giving name and face to a problem or enemy usually rallies spirits to fight it. Maybe giving it a title can help, I don't know Hikigaya, I'm just a deluded dumbass."
Now I feel bad.
I mean, it's not actually forbidden for someone like me. Us 'monsters of logic and reason' according to one very annoying siscon called Haruno Yukinoshita, otherwise known as INTP-A type Logicians.
That whole 16 personalities thing seems a little arbitrary and square, I mean, sure. It sounds fancy and gloating to say ' I am an innovative inventor with an unquenchable thirst for knowledge.' When in reality I'm just an asshole who can dispense a whole lot of fun facts and useless bullshit I store in my brain.
But, it is true that I can sometimes see things from a perspective no one else approaches.
This whole thing made me realize how disparaged my banter with Yukinoshita is. I call her Yukipedia and she calls me 'Hiki-insert insult of the day'. Heh
Well, that way of seeing things and the fact that I am objectively smart, actually comes in handy at the time of coming up with creative or argumentative essays, how hard can a fucking title be.
…
"I can't come up with anything"
"Really? You can submit shit so well written you'd think you could compete for a Kafka in the future but can't think of a title to describe how you feel?"
"Well that's not entirely true. I can think of a title for your own situation sensei."
"Oh yeah? What 's that?"
"How about…Wotakoi: Love is hard for an Otak-"
Bonk
I caress my injured skull and the Kairagi samurai I have for a teacher grumbles
"...sorry"
"Get real Hikigaya, and stop fucking around or find out."
Alright, enough stalling.
'But now I know you better.'
'Hikigaya-kun overdid it and gave you a good shove.'
'Even if your focus theory was masochistic or colossally stupid in its own way, I believe your words Hikigaya-kun.'
It was in Human development class as well the first time I wondered why my mind was clogged with raven hair, thigh high tights and freshly brewed tea. Well the thing is that the Service club, or better yet, Yukinoshita was pretty much the most eventful part of my day.
Even ignoring the out of nowhere crush I got on her, her and the club were bound to get huge real estate in the plane of my thoughts.
I got comfortable with her, showed her some part of me and had to depend on her, that's pretty much the fact of the matter.
The demon bugging me. The thousand demons bugging me.
"I have a thousand demons closing in on me…"
"..."
"Whispering hymns of joy allergy…"
"As if the sorrow only belonged to me…"
Hiratsuka closes her eyes, humms and repeats my brainchild
"I have a thousand demons closing in on me, whispering hymns of joy allergy, as if the sorrow only belonged to me." She chuckles
"Yup, that's on point from my perspective. So you were a deluded dumbass in the end."
"Huh?"
"You were aware if you could come up with that, just in denial."
"I don't follow." She pinches the bridge of her nose
"Hikigaya, has it ever occurred to you that some people give a shit about you? Has it ever occurred that you're not the only one troubled and burdened?"
It has, from day one, I could see her walls and her defenses, as everyone can see mine, but that does not entitle me to depending on her.
"I'll let you think about that, the sorrow isn't entirely yours, that's for sure. Moving on from right to left. Yet again, precise and accurate. You, you two in fact, both of you have a massive joy allergy, but it was probably severe now that you grew attached to it."
'So I ask if you're actually getting drunk. I'm gonna be honest, I don't think you can, but in the end it all comes down to you.'
"."
"And finally, a thousand demons. Not much to say, I know it, Haruno knows it, you know it. You have so much weight in your head you turned into a devil of logic, not necessarily bad, I think you would be a bland riajuu if you weren't this devil, but it gets hard for you Hikigaya, it'll get even harder."
She finally ignites her cigarette
"How do you know Haruno calls me something like that?" I ask
"Kid, come on. Who do you think she pestered to get info on you?" Fair
"You're dismissed Hikigaya, I liked your title."
I nod and get up to leave
"Oh, one last thing!-" I turn around "Having it harder from now on is something you'll have to face eventually, you specifically will have to make it through of your own volition if you are to make meaning of your title."
Meaning, I know for sure that I know nothing. But I definitely have a thousand demons closing in on me, whispering hymns of joy allergy, as if the sorrow only belonged to me.
To all this, I have no idea when that stupid work with Hayama and Miura is due for, nor what we have to actually do with that Giovanni's window bullshit.
I assume we fill in the respective areas featured in the concept, but why in teams? That kind of defeats the purpose of a hidden area.
Giovanni's window, something something 'Don't go Campanella, you promised we would see the Galaxy together.' I always cried when that part was shown.
Hmm, what other witty things can I think of with this thing? If you gaze through Johari's window you'll get reported for breaking and entering?
I'm out of ideas.
Oh well, I can always do emergency plan in case of teamwork #11. Just ignore that I am in a team altogether, do my part of the work or the entire assignment by myself and just deal with it later. Worst thing that can happen is I get scolded for not upholding the priceless learning of cooperation and team spirit, but given how the teacher is, I don't think he'll give a minimum amount of fucks.
I get near the gate when I'm intercepted once again by king normie and this time also his loyal companion. I think that's a big enough party to join.
"Oe Hikigaya!" Hayama calls to me with a smile and with Miura making a scowl besides him
There went Plan 11
"Yo."
"We were thinking of finishing the assignment today, I'd offer you to join our group, but we pretty much need you here so let's link up." Miura once again shoots me daggers with her eyes. I can't recall the last time I was a third wheel. I only ever go out with Komachi or with Hiratsuka, the latter being a weird situation in which we're both worth absolute dick, so it's not even a two wheel any more than it is a meeting of loners.
"Where are we going to do this?" I ask "Should we just head to the library to save time?" While I can say that the less time I spend with the heads of the popular clique the better, I was also thinking of brigading Zaimokuza's territory, he should be there right now. If I show up with two normies in tow he'd have a panic attack.
"Nah, let's go somewhere quieter for that." Uhh, was that code for something? Where can we get more quiet than the library? And I think Miura just fainted from hearing you say those words.
"Lead the way then."
I walked in silence for most of the trail, while the (blatantly fake and Hiki-Repellent) atmosphere was single handedly carried by Hayama. I sensed Miura was still bitter at my 'intruding', for she started to eye me at one point, probably thinking I couldn't notice.
"Ne Hikio"
"What"
"Where would you take a girl out?"
Huh?
Both Hayama and I are taken completely off guard by this question. Miura and I haven't interacted in the doubled digits, and I'd say ⅔ out of those she called me disgusting, or creep or something along those lines.
"Why- What brought this on?" I respond with another question hesitantly
"That haughty stuck up girl put her all in defending you earlier." Once again, the awkwardness is palpable within this trio without Miura noticing it.
"No comment." I say in a semi hushed volume
"I wasn't asking why she did that, she must have her reasons for seeing someone like you worth that much effort. But if you were to, say, take her out as a way of saying thanks, where would that be?"
…
This is some pro level of imprudence, almost at my level when speaking of Hiratsuka's age and socio affective status, but well, I usually know what I'm getting into.
"Uhhh.. Saize I think?"
They both deadpan
"You really are trash." The fire lady gives a verdict
Hayama gives what would seem like a lighthearted chuckle, so I'm not just surrounded by plastic riajuus, but also antisaizeriyan barbarians, disgusting.
We arrive at a coffee shop that seems rustic and a bit cozy. There are leather-like chairs and yellow light bulb strings.
What it is by Made in Japan is filling in as ambience sound added to the roasters and machines. Although this place seems like it would be my shit if I managed to gather enough willpower to go out of the house on weekends, I still don't know how this is any quieter than the school library building.
I order a cup of the house blend, black for once. Because albeit this place is admittedly nice, I refuse to have a good time in the company of these two, doing homework, no less.
Bleh, that 's bitter.
Miura orders a white Mocha with whipped cream and Hayama comes back with a vanilla cappuccino, we sit down close to a wooden furniture with newspapers and paperbacks to grab while you indulge yourself in caffeine.
"I thought you had a sweet tooth" Hayama mentions. Right, he was there when I got cocky with Haruno
"Life is bitter right now, thinking otherwise because of some sweetened drink would be delusional." I say with my eyes closed
Oh, shit. I sound like my old man.
"Well, let's get into it." I say as Miura attacks her mocha with gusto and Hayama nods
"We can either make a collective presentation talking about each other's areas, or respond to a questionnaire together."
"The questionnaire."
"The questionnaire." Miura and I reply immediately, to the notorious relief of Hayama.
Fake or not, we can all agree that talking about yourself on a profound level in front of your whole class is a fate worse than death. Hayama is faking everything, I am half embarrassed, half misanthropic. And even if Miura shares my gargantuan narcissism, she must understand how shit these are.
"Alright, the format will be the following, each question will be responded thrice. One answer for each of us." We nod
"First one: Public area."
"What do you think is the most notorious thing about you to the common eye."
"M-my smile?" Hayama says 'nervously', I presume not wanting to come off too egoistic, and of course Miura is turning into putty.
"I agree" She says meekly, I keep quiet, not objecting to it.
"Okay, most of Japan has black hair, so my locks?" Miura says and we both nod, writing down her answer.
My turn. "Uhhh my ahoge." I say absentmindedly
Miura, again with a poker face. "Hikio, your eyes are one of a kind, and I'm not complimenting them, you can put money on that."
Geez
"Hehe, I think she's right about that Hikigaya, your eyes are…memorable."
Damn.
Miura never holds back in calling me names, yet she still pulled her punches with this. And of course Hayama has experience in shallow compliments and sugarcoating insults. Apparently, the normie programming prohibits them to actually say something that harsh about my appearance, at least to my face that is.
Of course Yukinoshita would have had like a hundred words or more to shit on them by this point.
"Next question: What would you tell the world as a fun fact about yourself?"
"I like football"
"I like AKB48"
"I like MAX Coffee"
"A new transfer student asks you to hang out, what do you do?"
"I say sure and bring him in with my friends."
"Depends, is he a boy? or is she a girl? are they rude? Are they too much trouble?"
"Pretend to be asleep."
"Alright, hidden area: First question, what are you afraid of?"
"Hmmm, I don't like the thought of losing my friends, but I am more afraid of not being able to take back something I lost."
Seriously, like reading encrypted messages. Of course, neither Miura nor the stooges that make the peanut gallery of the classroom would pick up on. But ever since he told me about his feelings for Yukinoshita it's almost as if he transmitted a second code whenever I'm around.
Sometimes he doesn't even camouflage it with another rambling of normie gibberish I wouldn't relate to. But that one time in the committee he outright told me he was following my advice. Which is a lot, since I know for a fact Tobe and Totsuka also know he likes Yukinoshita, but he doesn't see a threat in them like he sees in me. Which honestly, realistically and regrettably I am not.
"Honestly, me too. I share that exact feeling" Goldielock queen bee seconds
What should I say? Japanese older people can get away with being edgy. Can I say I'm old fashioned and I am scared of Gaijin? Like say, an iron man masked black guy? Nah, not willing to go to the less cool councilor.
Digging deeper, I have a bit of repressed Gerascophobia. I still think the artificial magic behind youth is bullshit, but I kind of know that adulthood might be worse. I'm comfortable without that many responsibilities, I'm comfortable with leeching off my parents, I'm comfortable with Komachi!
I'm uncomfortable with throwing my last year of relative no fucks given freedom away…
Ugh, how the mighty have fallen, I thought something these two would say. But honestly, these years have been shit, and I had accepted they were shit. I tried making them enjoyable at one point and it blew up in my face.
But being frank, dancing the air guitar… having an empty call log… seeing Yukinoshita stride away in dignity, it all amounts to having other type of concerning thoughts.
Because hope is youthful, and hope in most cases is a blindfold that keeps you from discerning correctly.
The probability during that time in the bonfire of no girl wanting to touch me was high, so it happened that way.
Nevertheless, I have a lingering hope that refuses to die, I don't want to live the normie youthful experience ™. I am fine with not engaging in pleasantries or being excluded from social gatherings and interactions. The thing is, for once in my life I have actually talked to someone and I find it addictive.
If the options are staying the way I am or coping with the fear of missing out on something fake and shallow by joining a clique, confessing to someone equally desperate or going on a group date to see what I can fish out. I much rather keep to myself as the creepy loner with creepy eyes that Hiratsuka will whack with her fists of justice from time to time and Komachi will call a deadbeat.
But if a third option as appealing as the one that has made me grumble and space out for knocking me into an existential crisis appears. No matter how much I reason that it's stupid, no matter how much I come to terms that I will most likely grow old in a comfortable independence and solitude. That equally if not more comfortable routine of back and forth, intellectual debate with obscene amounts of narcissism and smugness from both parties, the tea and MAX coffee aficionado club it turned into. I feel like the prospect of an honest and authentic relationship with Yukinoshita is wiggled at my face like a cruel teasing with a cat wand.
I can't help fearing that it will end bitterly.
"Umm.. I fear that something will happen to my sister."
Neither of them seem to mind an answer like that, which is a truth anyways.
"Alright, Hikigaya fears for the safety of his sister… next question" Hayama mutters out loud while writing in my answer in his paper
"..." Hayama lets out a frown while he looks at the question, what does it say?
Oh.
'Have you betrayed someone? (Or has someone betrayed you?)'
Ugh, I just cannot get her out of my mind can I? I already had an intropunitive cringe session earlier, if I let down anyone, it's her. Aside from my disappointed parents that is.
Hayama seems to be thinking of the same girl as I am. Once again, neither have told me explicitly what happened in the past between them, but when Yukinoshita told me who Hayama was she once described him as her former favorite person in the world but now she expresses animosity towards him. And in that event a week ago he recalled their old bond as 'what he stupidly let go off'.
"err can it be someone famous? Can I write in Hajime Isayama?" He says nervously
Just as I thought, we- wait what? Miura also raises her brow
"D-did you read Shingeki?"
"Yeah, I did. I was quite disappointed with the ending. I felt deceived."
I see, I was thinking of this phrase in another context, but it fits.
Ehem (Crappy imitation of Kaji Yuki's voice) "Hayama, we are the same."
The blond fuck seemingly catches onto my reference, I wonder if he understood it completely. It has more than two layers.
"Hikigaya… what a man you are."
"Hayato, what are you saying?" Miura is visibly cringing at her prince partaking in otaku speak with 'Hikio'
We both avoid addressing what just happened any further. For starters, it can give some weird idea that we're friends, secondly. Hayama is also clever, he purposely got us a scapegoat in the form of Yams to avoid digging further into our regrets.
Miura shrugs "Well once not so long ago I had promised Yui that we would go watch a movie together and I completely forgot about it! I had to take her to Marinpia like 5 times along with Ebina to get the guilt off me!"
From there on out I replied relatively absentmindedly to most questions, I took some insults from Miura when we took on the Blind area and there wasn't much to do with the unknown area other than speculate and ponder.
For some reason I couldn't get out of my head the melody of Two-Lives from the 3:22 timestamp
Interlude
Summary: Controlled Correspondence
Interpretation: The youngsters feel that life has so much more to offer to them and for that, it is imperative to find the responsive and comprehensive association that they are looking for. Because of this, they accept most if not all opportunities presented to them. However, they maintain a critical attitude and reject being dragged by someone's magnetism unless they are guaranteed absolute genuinity and Integrity. Therefore, they conserve a strict control over their sentimental associations given that they must know with exactitude the situation they are in. They demand total sincerity as protection against their own tendency to be trusting.
Hiratsuka Shizuka POV:
Sigh
"Haruno, we're too old to be meddling like this with Kids, I have enough and more by just keeping them from becoming either cult leaders in case of Hikigaya or heartless robots in the case of the other two."
"But Shizuka-chan! This development I did not see coming, it's too interesting to ignore!" My former student pouts
"I don't doubt he's growing attached to her, but don't you think that if you go through with that you'll break him with no way to put him back together? That'd be a dick move considering your little sister worked hard to get to this point."
The images of them laughing together in the conference room and Yukinoshita sitting closely to a snoozing Hikigaya flash through my mind.
"Ah, that's exactly it Shizuka, I expected all along that little Yukino-chan would be the fragile one that would become dependent on him. Yet out of nowhere, the little demon of efficiency and objectivity surrenders to her, I don't buy it. He wasn't that strong if he could bet it all in a russian roulette like this." Haruno says in a cold tone
"How can you say that he 'surrendered to her'?"- I do the quote signal with my fingers to emphasize my skepticism "To my knowledge, brat's still a tactless jerk. True, he finds it in himself to care enough about his sister, and he saw himself in Rumi-chan. But I don't think he has yet developed romantic feelings for your sister."
"He's kind, from time to time he's surprisingly brave for how cowardly he usually is, and he craves something to the point I've observed him and read his shit he might find with her, but do you really think they can fall in love?" I continue
"Probably not, he told me that the monster of logic wishes with all its might that he didn't."
WHAT?
"Oi! Repeat that." I say with a stern voice to which Haruno grins playfully
Again with her original cheerful tone she starts
"You like battle royales don'tcha Shizuka-chan?"
"Huh?"
"Well we have one right here! Blonde mane vs raven ahoge. Warm confident blue marbles vs dead and reclusive dark orbs. Simping gallant vs needy tsundere. Hayama Hayato vs Hikigaya Hachiman. The finalists of the Yukibowl."
Her smile disappears
"No one will win."
"I feel like this is talking to a wall, but please don't toy with my students too much."
"Eh, can't help it, they're too cute and too fun."
"Aight, shut up kiddo, let's go get some beer." I say tiredly
Yukino POV:
"Miura-san?"
"Um… s'up Yukinoshita."
No headache yet, but I feel like there's one incoming. The blonde girl arrived alone in the clubroom which is only occupied by me at the moment. When I spoke with Hiratsuka-sensei earlier she told me it was probable that Hikigaya-kun would skip club today.
But I wonder, if she's here, his teammate, then why did Hikigaya-kun not show up?
Well, I actually shouldn't have expected him to come, we are in the closing 20 minutes of Club hours and someone as lazy as Hikigaya-kun wouldn't make the effort for a formality of attendance when there's nothing to do in such a little time.
But I wanted to speak to him, I have to.
"What do I owe this visit to? Do you have a request?"
"Um, yeah." She twirls her finger nervously around her lock
"I see, do you prefer to issue it tomorrow? Given that the club president isn't here right now, and well, geez Miura look at the time."
"I know, I know, dick move to arrive before closing time, but I seriously need your help. And it suits me best if Hikio doesn't hear."
I sigh, it could be something related to femininity if she prefers that the male member isn't present, and might be embarrassing of some sorts if she swallowed her pride to come here and ask for my assistance.
"Very well, what do you need help with?"
"It's about Hikio and Hayato.."
…
"Um.."
"Normally I would be raising hell in petty jealousy, but I know you guys have history together, can you help me understand Hayato?"
"A-are you asking for dating advice? Correct me if I put words in your mouth, but I don't think I am qualified, I have never dated anyone, and Hayama-kun isn't an exception. We were close friends when we were children. And furthermore I don't see how Hikigaya-kun fits in the equation."
"Err, that too. I'll be blunt Yukinoshita, I hate you, but I saw how you defended Hikio today when he had resigned himself to wherever his actions took him, and honestly… I was impressed."
"."
"But answer me this. Did he actually not manipulate you? If he did I would have no use to be here."
I wouldn't have to answer that, but I decided earlier I wouldn't stand to just observe through a glass. Not me.
"He did not manipulate me or coerce me in any way. Whilst his actions were idiotic and rash, he did it to protect me and my image in the moment of crisis, I just thought I could protect him too when he simply did not deserve to have his figurative throat cut for a morally grey lie."
A white lie from my part. A half truth from my part.
I wanted to scream at Hikigaya-kun while at the same time I wanted to protect him from the measured cruelty of the things that lurk, the things to which I was left to fend off.
My resentment from that time of my life is directed not just at Hayama-kun, but at my family, at professors, at my peers, at this world. At myself
It was not just the event in the camp with Tsurumi-san that triggered some caring instinct in me and left my mouth bitter, I witnessed a repetition of things that I have lived but this time through a third person angle. It felt horrible, I know it's childish to be bothered by things that happened due to my own weakness in arrogance, and in elementary and middle school no less. But I wanted to protect Tsurumi-san somehow. At that moment, everything I wanted was for her to have a pillar of support, a knife to fend off the bloodthirsty dangers that waylay in circles.
Yet Hikigaya-kun appeared and beat me to it, since I didn't have a plan to begin with. While I had felt warmth from his actions to console Tsurumi-san earlier, since I didn't have that either in my younger days, his very elaborate stunt I did not see coming.
If the only method to protect me from the harassment was for Hayama-kun or Nee-san to sacrifice themselves, I prefer the way things turned out. I felt helpless when the day we returned to school the story of the Oni was spreading. But it passed quickly since the festival was now on everyone's minds.
While Hikigaya-kun and I felt in some ironic comfortable groove while handling the organization of the festival, I started to doubt everything when I felt overwhelmed and both him and Hayama-kun immediately tried to support me, in different ways.
While I dislike Hayama-kun's approach as he tried to shamelessly pamper me as if I demanded tribute and attention, Hikigaya-kun did worse.
Once again, he took a bullet, but this time it seriously hurt me, for I was the one it was aimed for.
Past me would have been extremely happy if I told her she would have someone that would shield her from the same tiring adversities she faced, but I repeat myself, with the context that she would be protected at the cost of someone's dignity and pain. It was not worth it.
I felt angry, I felt betrayal, I felt a lot of negative emotions. Because the Service club president with whom I had grown more close than anyone, revealed himself as someone with no regard for himself.
Kind enough to keep my, our labor in mind, but reckless enough to cause long term damage to himself. Did he not think that just because of this little joke of a solution a University that asks for references to professors and associates might turn him down? That's even without mentioning the hell that he faced in the classroom.
He took a PUNCH to the mouth for the sake of my reputation. I wouldn't accept it.
If well I was mad at him, I couldn't bear to be indifferent to his suffering as people were with mine, whether it was of his own doing or not, I had to be different this time.
Then it hit me 'I want the both of you to help the other, by any means necessary'. That was what Hiratsuka-sensei told us to do the day I met him.
A forced routine at first, but I had to find a way to give back to Hikigaya-kun, and if I want to even alter this world and its ruthlessness, I should do it in the best way possible.
Ergo, I went with an option that rarely works, humans are brutal and speeches usually fail to make ends be fulfilled in confrontation. But talking down the story of a raging high school girl that was relying on an accepted image engraved to Hikigaya-kun's person was like handling the bull from the horns.
"So? What is it that you want to understand?"
"Give me some few words on how you would describe the both of them based on these answers."
She hands me her paper
"Hayama-kun is a reliable person who wants to establish himself as a shoulder to lean on and an ear to listen." I reply first with a quick skim over his answers
"R-right?" The old Miura-san that picks a fight whenever she sees me has seemingly returned
"Hikigaya-kun on the other hand…"
'A3 (Hikio): His eyes'
'A3 (Hikio): He likes coffee'
'A3 (Hikio): He'd pretend to be asleep'
'A3 (Hikio): He fears for the safety of his loved ones'
That last one is not an answer I'd expect from him, but knowing him he must have been thinking of Komachi-san, and that boy is a hopeless siscon.
'A3 (About Hikio): He sometimes drools when he actually falls asleep in class'
I repress a chuckle as I have witnessed that sight several times here in the clubroom. Alright, I suppose Miura-san will get a better answer if I just speak from experience.
"Hikigaya-kun is a slothful, utilitarian and vile boy, but he is intellectual and compassionate. He talks very selfishly, almost infuriatingly so, but very occasionally he can be sweet. He's a boy whom you should expect to say something appalling, but also someone that would give you the coldest drink on a warm day.
While he's pessimistic and at times would seem insecure, you can't help but find amusing and astounding how he stands up to a hostile society and takes pride in his ways, not commendable ways at that, but resilience and identity are always praiseworthy.
And…and he behaves like a cat."
Some seconds pass and I look up to see Miura-san completely flabbergasted. I might have gone a little overboard while speaking of my clubmate. Superfluous but truthful anyways.
"Yeah, I'm not writing that."
"You are to write what you will with the information I gave you."
"But that was so disparaging in comparison! You gave me the most generic 'He's a nice guy' when speaking of Hayato, and then went all Shakespeare when speaking of Hikio! Are you going to compose a Haiku about his ahoge next?"
This made a little bit flustered
"Wha?! I most certainly didn't! I just gave you info proportional to who I spend the most time with, wouldn't you get angry if I talked about Hayama-kun for a long time?"
I hit back and now she's the blushing one
Knock knock
Miura-san slightly jumps from the surprise and in a panicked state tries to lower the flush in her cheeks.
"Come in." I say in a smooth tone to calm us both down
When the door opens I stiffen and Miura san almost chokes, the door reveals orange hair let down and a black messy bird nest.
"Huh? Hikio?! Tobecchi?"
"Oh Yumiko!"
"Miura? What are you doing here?"
The two question why is she here, bringing her into an even deeper panic. I understand why, I managed to conceal the embarrassment upon realization. We were literally discussing boys, not that different from when Nee-san brought friends home to slumber parties when she was in middle school.
In my now confused clubmate's words: The epitome of youthful shenanigans. And added to that he was the main subject, if it's embarrassing for me, he'd have a seizure if he learnt two girls such as ourselves were debating about his qualities and disadvantages.
I'm not sure what I would even do with that knowledge now that I think about it, but at least I can be grateful Nee-san wasn't here to tease me, I know she would be having the time of her life.
I bring a half closed fist in front of my mouth and rasp my thoat
"Ehem Hikigaya-kun. Tobe-kun, what is it that you need?"
"I…uh, Tobe has a request, I was coming to the clubroom when I ran into him."
"uM… Hikitani-bro, I think it's b-best if we talk this later hehe" Tobe-kun says in an incredibly shaky tone
Hikigaya-kun stares at him, of course discerning that he doesn't want to talk about it.
"I see, can I tell Yukinoshita? I mean, she has to know eventually if we are to work on it."
"I-umm, sure, but I'll come again tomorrow."
Hikigaya-kun shrugs "Suit yourself" Miura-san raises her brow, despite her not being the brightest in this school she noticed she was the only one not let into whatever Hikigaya-kun will inform me of later, of course a tantrum is incoming.
"Oi! Now what is this you're keeping from me Kakeru!" At the use of his given name and being called out, the orangette turns into a stuttering mess
"We are the real guys of Daft-Punk without helmets Miura, it was a secret but you discovered us, we were going to ask Yukinoshita to help us perfect our french accents when speaking."
Miura-san can obviously tell Hikigaya-kun gave her the most childish lie he could think of, but she lets it go.
"Come on Yumiko, I actually called Ooka and Yui, we can meet up with them in Parco, Hayato said he'll also come but will get there, like late and stuff" Tobe-kun starts drawing escape plans, I try to not let a wince show in my face at the mention of Yuigahama-san.
Following her display after word got around of Hikigaya-kun's lie she's no longer welcome in this club room.
"Oh, uh sure."
"Right, `noon Hikitani bro! peace Yukinoshita-san" He says in haste
"Thank you for the help Yukinoshita" The blonde follows him
"It's no problem Miura-san, goodbye Tobe-kun."
"Take care Tobe. Also you Miura" My clubmate also bids farewells to them and they close the door behind them.
By now the club hours are over and the orange of the evening tints the clubroom. Silence traps us with the only sounds being distant noises of the last people leaving the school grounds.
"."
"."
"Hikigaya-kun"
"Yukinoshita… I.." His face contorts into one of extreme displeasure, almost painful
"...I'm- I'm sorry. I know a shallow apology means absolutely nothing, it does nothing, it solves nothing. But still, please forgive me." He looks directly at me
Sigh "Hikigaya-kun, I'm… not angry at you, at least not anymore." The painful expression of his rotten eyes looks more prominent and he cringes
"You should be"
"Hmmm, perhaps."
"And… thank you" He almost whispers
I giggle "Did I or didn't I tell you that this type of idiocy would catch up with you and with the club. Serves you right for ignoring my advice Hiki-stubborn-kun"
"Heh, I'll give you that one. This one backfired magnanimously and royally." He gives a self deprecating expression
"Ara, quite submissive today? Not surprising taking into account how many hills I have killed you on before."
After a little while of mild banter I suggest we should wrap everything up for today and he stops me.
"I…uh. Hey, uh.."
"Get on with it Hikigaya-kun, it's getting dark."
"Sorry, had a lot in my mind and lost track of words."
"No worries, but please hurry up."
He looks at me with a completely neutral face, only his ears being tinted red betraying his newfound seriousness.
"Can we exchange contact information?"
"."
"Yes."
I could think of a million ways to tease him about his faux bravado and too hard attempt to remain stoic, but honestly it's surprising how well the club has functioned with zero communication outside school hours with few exceptions.
"Komachi-san, your parents, Zaitsu-kun and Totsuka-kun. I see I get the privileged spot number 6 in your contact list excluding some businesses. It's crowded here, no?" He grumbles
"Leave me alone."
' 'The castle really does exist' she thought.
She stroked the walls and fingered the candlesticks, tested the soft red carpeting with her toes. This is no illusion
But what is this place?'
Bzzt
I am brought back from the immersion of my reading by the vibration of my phone.
Hikigaya sent an Image
I rub my bare shoulder left uncovered by my cardigan. To say I am surprised is an understatement, I assumed he couldn't have cared less about if he got my number correctly or not and only communicated when we had club business.
When I open the image with no text I find a silly picture of a cat loafing in a bathtub.
"Good evening to you Hikigaya-kun, May I ask if this is the famous Kamakura-san Komachi-san mentioned during Kawasaki-san's request to which you cruelly denied me the pleasure of meeting?" I reply
Bzzt
"Geh, forget about that, that was a stupid proposal for the context anyways, and no, you're not worthy yet of Kamakura daily pics."
"Yet? How may I become worthy then?"
7 minutes passed and I was about to resume my reading, assuming he forgot to reply.
"Trade me random cat pics."
My lips curve upwards. That I can do. Even though I don't own a Michi myself, I scavenge some internet forums in search of amusing cat pictures from time to time. In fact, they are the sole reason I have some accounts in some social media networks and a large portion of the pictures stored in my phone.
I send a rather silly picture of a Scottish fold in a fridge diligently nibbling the plastic package of a rotisserie chicken.
"Heh, cute. But watch this."
I receive a video of someone's hand frantically petting a kitten curled into a ball while screaming as if charging into battle.
I think out loud with a smile on my lips.
"Dummy."
Lads, don't get scared by what I put on the last afterword, that whole cheating then separation theme/arc won't be featured in this story. I actually lost some follows, I have no way to know, but I will attribute it to that idea XD
Following up with something I said last chapter, I was looking for Hayama inspiration and finally dared to read 'Our wedding anniversary is wrong' by the guy who wrote Love and Coffee…while I found jackshit regarding Hayama, that's one hell of a story. I postponed reading it because I was actually scared by a well written story involving 'Hayama Yukino.'
Once again, my painful stories are shit so far, stories like that one make me want to one day have a breakthrough.
TLDR: Fret not, there won't be any NTR in this fic.
Also, Fun fact: I only mentioned Re:Re to pay homage to the second japanese song I added to my playlist almost 3 years ago when I started to walk the way of the Otaku, only preceded by Cruel Angel's Thesis (Yes, believe it or not Eva was one of my first animes I watched as a weeb) I heard that song before watching Erased. But now I have. Anyways, the song is a fucking banger….
This is it, my last month as a high schooler. It was shit honestly, but before going to University I should be able to write a lot of stuff.
Next Chapter: Old capital.
