He was a curious boy with eyes a strange mix of orange and yellow, resembling the dawn that breaks through the night or the dusk that gives way to it. They held a strange contradiction in them- of hopelessness and hope, of faith and faithlessness, of strength and weakness.
Remus didn't quite know what to make of the enigma that was Ciel Forrest.
He was wary at first, his condition no longer allowing him to grow too close lest someone found out. It didn't help that the boy was most likely a muggle. There was a bit of pity for him as well after Remus found that he was an orphan. Remus himself wouldn't have been able to imagine a life without his parents.
He didn't really know why Ciel would always seek him out either. Two weeks since they had met, they had fallen into a routine of meeting during the afternoons. Remus would sit on the rock and Ciel on the ground. In a gesture of politeness, Remus had once offered his seat, to which Ciel replied,
"It's okay," a small smile had flickered on his lips as his eyes glazed over in nostalgia (they did that often. Becoming glassy and looking at something that wasn't quite there), "There's a certain feeling that the earth has. Balance and stability. Reminds me of a friend."
Remus wondered what kind of friend would leave such a pained feeling of loss in the boy's eyes.
However, today was a day following the full moon. Remus had no reserves about staying inside the house instead of meeting up with the boy. They weren't that close anyways. He didn't think that Ciel would knock on the door.
From his room, he heard his mother answer. There was a short conversation with her explaining to Ciel that he was sick before Remus heard a wish from the boy to get better soon before he left.
"You have more scars," Ciel noted the day that Remus finally returned.
Remus flinched, his head ducking in a futile attempt to hide his face. A frown tugged at Ciel's lips as he kneeled in front of the boy. One tender hand, free of any marks that most young boys carried, extended to trace the fresh pink lines marring Remus' face.
The contact had Remus jerking his head back and leaving Ciel's hand to linger in the air. There was a terse silence between them as Remus watched Ciel with wide eyes and Ciel kept his eyes on his hand, a little hurt and confusion mixed in them.
"Sorry," Ciel finally apologized. "Force of habit."
"'S okay," Remus mumbled, his hand absentmindedly moving to trace the places Ciel's fingers touched.
When Remus looked back at Ciel, he was sitting, his head cocked to the side as dawn coloured eyes watched him. There was something eerie about them- something knowing and probing.
"Do you have a pet cat?" Ciel asked after many moments passed.
Eyebrows knitting in confusion, Remus answered, "No?"
Ciel's lips made an 'oh'. "Those are scratch marks. On your face."
Once again, Remus tensed. Ciel smiled in a comforting manner, making Remus' muscles relax. He was still wary of the boy who seemed too observant for his own good but there was so much warmth radiating off of him that Remus couldn't help but feel a little at ease.
"I had a friend with a rather temperamental cat once," Ciel recounted, fondness in his tone. "The amount of scratches that he had incurred were numerous." He paused before squinting his eyes. "But the scars on your face aren't too much like a cat's now that I look closer. Maybe a dog's?"
"Can we…." Remus trailed off, feeling rather uneasy.
Ciel blinked. "Oh, right. I'm sorry. It's none of my business." There was a short laugh. "I forget sometimes."
Remus let out a small sigh of relief.
"I haven't really," there was a pause as Ciel's eyebrows furrowed, searching for a word that was escaping his grasp, "interacted with anyone lately." Another laugh, a little hollow this time. "Just a little rusty on my people skills. I'll get better."
"Oh," was Remus' bland response. "What made you talk with me then?"
"Promise you won't be offended?"
Green eyes narrowed. "We'll see."
"That's not much of an assurance," Ciel pointed out, a soft smile on his face. "It's because I heard your face was scarred."
Ice cold water seemed to have been thrown on Remus.
"But not because I wanted to make fun of you or pity you," Ciel continued, sensing the barely concealed hurt in the boy. "I knew someone- he was someone close to me and well, he had a lot of scars on his face too."
Remus gathered himself together again. If Ciel went on like this, he would be gaining many mini heart attacks. "Really? How'd he get them?"
"Can't really say," Ciel said, looking into the distance again with that far off gaze. "When I came looking for you...I don't know. I just wanted to see a shadow of him I guess."
"Did you then?"
Another laugh, this one long and slow and full of memories. "Not exactly. Xanxus, oh kami-"
The unfamiliar name, word and the way his voice slipped into an accent not quite British had Remus looking at Ciel in curiosity and wonder. Ciel did not seem to notice, too caught up in his memories.
"He was- well, he was the very personification of wrath. But he was good you know-" a moment of silence, "-well, he wasn't actually good per se but he was one of- well, I can't really explain. I loved him, in simplest terms. You- you have a hidden rage in you but I can tell that you want to be soft-"
And there was that mini heart attack.
"You're sneaky and clever- don't think I haven't noticed- but your heart's in the right place. And well- you remind me of more than one of my friends." Ciel blinked, eyes finally focusing back into reality and turning to look at him. He laughs sheepishly. "Sorry."
Remus hummed in response, not bothering to tell Ciel that it was okay because it really wasn't. He was beginning to feel a little uncomfortable with the way that Ciel would just...not be there at times. He was there, physically, but not quite mentally or spiritually. It was like he was in another world, seeing people of another time. It sent a strange feeling through him that demanded him to abort.
But that warmth he emitted was so welcoming.
Ciel let out a deep shuddering breath. "You're Rain."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Remus asked, tilting his head.
"Tranquility," he answered, a little thoughtful. "To be the blessed shower that settles conflict and washes everything away."
Remus mulled over his words. It was almost as though Ciel was quoting something as he spoke and he wondered what classification Ciel was using to determine what he was. Looking at the boy with strangely coloured eyes, he noted how they were looking at something far away again. Remus was beginning to grow a little tired of it.
"And how would you describe yourself?" Remus inquired.
He meant it as a way to redirect the boy back to reality but it seemed to have the opposite effect for Ciel's expression turned very pained. There was a war going on in his eyes and Remus regretted his question.
"You don't have to answe-"
"A failed Sky," Ciel spat as though disgusted with himself. "A worthless, failed Sky."
They fell into silence. Ciel lost in his thoughts once more and Remus awkwardly sat beside him, trying to decipher what the boy meant. Remus had only known him for three weeks, not enough time to comfort the boy from a past that he did not know. However, his curiosity was alighted.
But he did not dare ask. Not about what being a Sky meant or what it meant to be a failed one. Instead, he silently filed the information in his head later. He would write it down when he gets home. Maybe even jot down a few other odd behaviours that Ciel exhibited. Perhaps it would allow him to figure out the mystery that is Ciel Forrest.
Six weeks since the day they first met, Ciel finally seemed to get his act together and display appropriate behaviour. His eyes rarely glazed over, although Remus had an inkling that it was more due to him having gained control over his displayed emotions rather than his sporadic moments of 'not being present' stopping.
He seemed to have grown more sauve, having mannerisms and actions unbefitting of a seven year old. Not that his previous behaviour was like a seven year old's but this was more...mature whereas the previous was more lost. Remus didn't know what switch was turned that allowed this rather drastic change but he didn't hate it.
Ciel was now...he was more than just a companion. He would give him chocolate ("Bought it with the allowance that the head caretaker gives," he had said.), and would talk with him about the books he read, and it was just so nice to finally have a friend. The things about Ciel that had previously annoyed him seemed to have simply vanished and it was as though Remus found the perfect friend.
But there was always the nagging fear that someday, Ciel might find out who he really is and hate him. The same eyes that look at him with such tenderness would change into one of fear. Soft spoken words would be laced with disgust and poison.
But a month passed, and then another, until two years had flown by. Despite the transformation every month and the obvious signs of exhaustion that would weigh upon his shoulders, Ciel never spoke a word about it. Instead, he would trace the new scars that were created with a touch so gentle, he would barely feel it.
Remus hadn't let him do it at first, of course. He couldn't remember the last time someone other than his parents had touched him. But he had eventually caved in to the lost puppy look that would cross Ciel's face.
Remus' worries had eased in the stretch of time that had passed. It wasn't so difficult to hide his furry little problem when the other party didn't probe too deep. Not like the adults or the other children he had encountered elsewhere.
Of course, good things never lasted with Remus.
This A/N's going to be long lmao.
Suddenly got back into reading HP x KHR fics and went through my own archive to find this. I had most of this written out already from when I first started writing this fic, couldn't remember where I was going with it, and just decided to add the last couple of paras to end it there.
I don't know if I'll update this anymore. Tbh, haven't felt like writing for years now. I don't really have much of an interest in reading anymore too. But I suddenly got a random burst of energy and inspiration (just so happened to be at the worst possible time too cause my arms hurt). I genuinely don't remember where I was going with this story at all though.
Thanks for reading despite everything though!
