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Pleasure Meadow - 2F

As it stood, a hundred different things were going through my mind at the moment. Apart from a mystery dungeon fittingly named Pleasure Meadow, I still had no idea where I was, who I was, or even why I was. As it also stood, the acquaintance I'd made in Poppy didn't seem like she'd be much help in furthering any of said ideas at the moment. The Pikachu was just... sitting there, fiddling with the frayed threads of her bandana and looking straight ahead with the thousand-yard stare of someone suffering a crisis of the existential variety.

It had started after the electric mouse had cleaned her and my semi-conscious self off following our little escapade. She'd retrieved a burlap sack carrying various supplies, producing a pair of hand towels and a flask of water to get us as clean as could reasonably be expected when lost in a twisted parody of the great outdoors. I was worried that I'd pop another boner as she scrubbed at my crotch with the wetted towel, but I must've been too exhausted because my tool stayed thankfully hidden from where it'd finally retreated. After repeating the process on herself, the rodent offered me what she'd called an Oran Berry to put a pep in my step. My genuine unfamiliarity with the fruit had somehow been what was needed to convince her that I might've been telling the truth about being human.

As was being demonstrated now, she wasn't handling it very well.

Watching her look ahead without blinking for this long was really starting to worry me, so I swallowed the last of the peculiar-tasting berry and licked its juices from my muzzle with a new, more flexible tongue. I quietly marveled at myself, strength seeping back into me in a second wind. I stood on legs that were more sure of themselves, putting the idea of magical healing berries on the backburner as I meandered over to Poppy's side. "Hey," I tried, tapping her on the shoulder with a paw. "Are you uh... doing alright?"

The Pikachu started and looked at me for an uncomprehending moment before realization dawned on her. "O-oh yeah, I was just thinking to myself. Did you already finish eating? 'Cause nothing good will come from just sitting still here."

This time it was my turn to give the appraising look. It was hard getting past the fact that I was peering at a real-life Pikachu, but apart from that, it wasn't difficult to see through the front she was putting up. She was definitely rattled about the elephant in the room... or whatever the Pokémon equivalent to an elephant was. The smile she was offering me was as plastic as a Barbie doll's and there was just something in her eyes that screamed to me that she was distracted. Was she really that much of an open book or was I just good at reading people? I didn't know and, frankly, didn't care. All that mattered was that something was wrong and I wanted to fix that. Despite having cleaned me, she gave off some serious tomboy vibes, so maybe some light teasing would put her in a better mood. "I'm ready..." I said, "unless you want more time to come to terms with how good the sex was," I threw in an exaggerated smirk for added effect and breathed an inward sigh of relief when she snorted.

"As if," she shot back, rising to her feet, "that didn't even make it to my top five." She reached for her bag, every item (Wonder Orb included) having already been placed inside, and slung it over a shoulder.

"Guess I'll have to try harder next time, then," I winked. "Top ten will have to do for now."

Poppy made a scoffing sound. "Top ten? It's a bit presumptuous to think I've had that much sex."

"Ooh, bustin' out the big words, eh?" I chuckled, quickly growing to enjoy myself as I fell into step beside the Pikachu. "Hard to not presume things when someone you've met for less than a minute asks you for a good fuck."

Poppy made a face and I was pretty sure a blush had appeared beneath her fur, the red circles on her cheeks having lit up with a glow that was hard to spot in the daylight. My smile slid from my face as she turned to look ahead, clearly uncomfortable. "Point taken, though the notches in my bedpost were all gotten under a dungeon's influence. Believe it or not, most of us aren't raging sex addicts."

Damn, I pushed a bit too hard there. I tried thinking of a way to salvage the conversation but ultimately failed, responding with a grunt. A silence grew between us as we walked and I only had myself to blame. Note to self: more or less calling someone a slut wasn't the best way to cheer them up. "Sorry," I apologized, breaking the awkward lull, "I guess I overstepped my bounds there. I'm pretty new to all of what's going on."

Poppy cast me a sideways glance, looking genuinely caught off-guard by the apology. "It's fine," she replied. "You were just trying to take my mind off things and got carried away."

I had a misstep and nearly faceplanted into the ground. My eyes fell back to the Pokémon and I was met with a coy smile. It looked like this girl was more clever than I gave her credit for.

I picked up my pace until I was back beside the electric mouse and made a harrumphing noise, feigning agitation. "Well, since you just ruined my whole plan to make you feel better and get to know one another, do you just wanna skip to the part where we become friends or whatever?"

"Sure, just as long as we add 'with benefits' as an amendment," Poppy said, sniggering. "You seem pretty cool, even if I am a bit disappointed that the human I met is a teensy little Eevee and not something more exciting." Her mirthful expression became one of deep thought as we rounded a corner. More silence followed before she nodded to herself. "Evan," she said simply.

"Evan?" I echoed, tilting my head.

"Yep, Evan," Poppy confirmed, nodding again in satisfaction. "That's what I'm calling you since you can't remember your name. You look like an Evan and it's a pretty generic name for an Eevee so... you're Evan now."

"Whoah, hold on a second," I began, "you just said I was cool. Why are you giving me a boring-ass name like Evan? Shouldn't I get a cool name, like Wolfgang? Or Max Thundercock?"

Poppy made a spluttering sound. "Max Thundercock?!"

"Well... I did sorta bang a Pikachu," I defended. "That's gotta count for something, right?"

"Umm... not unless you're weak to Electric-types," the Pikachu said. "Sorry, dude, you're stuck being Evan."

"...Yippee," I groused.

A more amiable quiet fell over us as we continued down the corridor. This seemed to be the longest one I'd gone through yet, but the room it led to was just ahead. We entered without fanfare and stopped to get a good look at everything. My eyes brightened at seeing another set of magical stairs to the left, but I was stopped from heading that way by a paw that grabbed me by the scruff of my neck. I tried turning to look at the Pikachu, but she used her hold on me to direct my attention toward something else in the room. Emerging from another corridor was one of the pink deer that I'd seen earlier, freezing upon spotting us, its eyes wide and ears erect like... a deer caught in the headlights.

"Oh, this is too perfect!" Poppy exclaimed, sounding very eager all of a sudden. "Since you're new to being a Pokémon and being in a mystery dungeon, I can totally use this to properly introduce you to how things work in this place!" I was let go of and my companion came into view, gesturing at the hoofed creature. "You see, mystery dungeons are crawling with feral Pokémon like that Deerling. Despite the look he's giving you, that little weed is ready to do anything except run away. Most of the time, ferals in mystery dungeons can be dealt with in one of two ways: you can fight them... or you can fuck them."

I felt my jaw go slack. She wasn't serious, was she? Paying no heed to the dumbstruck look I was giving her, she continued to point. "And since you strike me as the kind of guy who isn't into riding cervine dicks—which are entirely different from Servine dicks, by the way—that means we're not going up those stairs until you fight and, preferably, win."

Somehow, that was just as ridiculous as the idea that I could actually fuck my way through a place like this. "I-I can't fight," I stammered, "I don't even know if I had a decent punch as a human and you want me to throw hands when I don't even have hands? Not happening."

"It'll be fine," Poppy promised, "just throw out a few moves and he'll go down before you know it."

"What do you mean, 'moves'?"

Poppy blinked. "What do you mean? Do humans... not have moves?"

"If you're talking about how you can shoot lightning and shit, then no."

The Pikachu regarded me with a slight frown before turning back to the surprisingly patient Deerling, then back to me. She hummed thoughtfully for a moment before turning that frown upside-down with the same plastic smile from earlier. "It'll be fine. Think of it as a learning experience."

Alright, this was definitely payback for calling her a slut.

For a moment I considered making a break for the stairs, but there was something about standing next to a taser with legs that made the idea less and less appealing the more I thought about it. That didn't make the alternative any better though. I was pretty sure fighting or whatever was synonymous with Pokémon from what I could gather from my fragments of memory, but I seriously didn't know the first thing about doing... whatever an Eevee was supposed to do. My eyes flicked back to Poppy. "Fine," I grumbled, "but will you at least back me up when things go south? Because I'm pretty sure things are about to go south."

The Pikachu nodded. "Sure."

My gaze returned to the Deerling and I took a deep, steadying breath. I can't believe I was actually about to do this. I placed one paw in front of the other and began to walk toward the pink deer Pokémon. "Hey, Bambi," I barked out, "unless you wanna end up like your mom, you'd better run for the hills. Otherwise, I'll have to bury you beneath 'em."

"What are you even going on about?" Poppy called from behind, "He can't understand a word you're saying, just learn to Tackle his ass so we can keep going."

I turned back and narrowed my eyes at the Pikachu. "Bro, if you're making me fight a Pokémon I'm damn well gonna talk smack to it and—"

For the second time that day, I regret taking my eyes off a feral Pokémon. The world went tumbling as the cervid plowed into my flank in an explicitly non-sexual way, getting me what felt like pretty good air time. I came to a rolling stop back beside Poppy, who was currently trying and failing to cover her smile with a paw. "You uh, might want to pay a bit more attention there," she instructed, voice quavering as she tried not to laugh.

"I'll get right on that,' I grunted, pushing myself back upright to glare at the Deerling. His head was lowered, a foreleg pawing at the grass in his best imitation of an angry bull. "Alright, pinky, I'm gonna have to end your bloodline for that. Don't say I didn't warn you."

Taking a page from the feral rat I already had to deal with, I lowered my own head and charged straight toward the creature. I let out a battle cry as I approached the deer and pounced, but was woefully unprepared for the creature to rear up and smack me out of the air with flailing forelegs. I felt a hoof crack me over the head and I went down with a soft thud in the grass below the creature. That was apparently too much for Poppy to handle and I heard the Pikachu bust out laughing from where I was currently experimenting with a soil-rich diet. I glanced up in time to see the Deerling preparing to instead bury me beneath the metaphorical hills and rolled to the side as another hoof came stomping down where my head had just been. Still between his forelegs, I took the opportunity to finally land a blow of my own, shooting to my feet in record time to spring up to slam the creature in the chest with all my weight.

I... might have forgotten in the excitement that I was now the size of a lapdog and, by extension, likely weighed the same as one.

I wish I could say the move did something, but it didn't. The Deerling barely budged from my puny counterattack and Poppy began laughing so hard that I was sure if I turned around to look at her she'd be doubled over. I barely had any time to react before the Pokémon had taken a step back and spun around to lash out with its rear legs in a donkey kick. I instinctively fell back to the ground, the hooves sailing over my head, and got a good look at the Pokémon's junk. Wait, I just had another idea! It probably broke the rules of chivalrous combat, but fuck chivalry! The creature's legs landed with a slight spread and I took the chance to finish this fight the dirty way. I repeated what I'd done earlier and rose as fast as I could, shooting up into a headbutt.

Right in the Pokéballs.


Somewhere within the second floor of Pleasure Meadow, a long, agonizing bleat tore through what was an otherwise peaceful morning ambiance. Every feral Pokémon with a dick, upon hearing the anguished sound, shuddered and crossed their hind legs in a primal gesture of male solidarity that transcended such paltry concepts as species.


Pleasure Meadow - 3F

"Geez, even I felt that," Poppy finally commented once the distorting void receded and we found ourselves on the next floor, looking as though she wanted to drop her bag and cradle her balls despite not having said balls. "You might've gotten a bit zealous about winning that one."

I couldn't help but agree in part. My own marbles were still aching with phantom pain from the sound the Deerling had made but I didn't necessarily believe I went overboard. The fucker had tried to cave my skull in. I glanced over to my chaperone and gave another quadruped equivalent of a shrug. "What's done is done... unless you want to head back downstairs and give him one of those fancy blue fruits as a participation trophy?"

"Pfft, don't be ridiculous," Poppy replied, "even if it were possible to go backward in a dungeon, my ass is too poor to be handing out free food to ferals. Still, you need to learn how to battle as a Pokémon if we're assuming you might be sticking around for a while. What you did in that fight was less a Tackle and more you slamming into him with your body weight."

"Umm, I don't want to be that guy, but I'm pretty sure that's what a tackle is."

Poppy blinked dumbly, then she facepalmed... or would it be facepawed. "Oh, I didn't mean tackle as in the action, I meant the move Tackle. They're two totally different things. It probably doesn't make sense since you don't know what a move is in the first place but I can explain it better once we're out of here. This place has four floors, so we're over halfway through."

I nodded and kept pace with the electric mouse as we left the latest room and came up to another T-shaped intersection. Her eyes bounced between the two paths for several moments in what was in all likelihood a mental game of Eeny, Meeny, Miney, Moe and she ended up taking a right.

We continued with no interruptions and my mind began to wander. I mulled over everything that had happened in the short time between waking up and now, finding it a tall order to wrap my head around the idea that I was suddenly a Pokémon in an unfamiliar world. A world with space-time fuckery that liked to give everyone inside a serious case of horny. A world where humans were apparently a bygone race from a bygone era. That last part in and of itself was pretty wild when I thought about it...

...

...

And the more I thought about it, the less sense it made.

The problem was this: I was a human from Earth, that much I knew, but Earth didn't have Pokémon... or at least we didn't have them running around in the flesh. Yet this world, which had humans in it at some point, did have real Pokémon. Did that mean Pokémon became real in the future and I was sent through time to this future? Or was this some parallel Earth where Pokémon was more than just some franchise? Wait, was this even Earth? What if this was an entirely different planet in an entirely different universe? Jesus Christ, this situation was even more fucked up than I'd first realized! And I still don't know why I can't remember—

"Hey, you okay? You look like you're about to start freaking out on me."

I jerked at the voice and my eyes roamed back to Poppy. Her face was an unreadable mask but her eyes were full of concern. "I'm fine," I said, shaking my head some. "I was just thinking to myself. I uh, noticed something that wasn't adding up. Something about me being human and what you said about them earlier."

We stopped moving through the corridor as I relayed the discrepancy I'd noticed between the Pikachu's version of humanity and what I could piece together from my clusterfuck of a brain. I held nothing back, even telling my companion about how Pokémon didn't exist in the traditional sense back home. I voiced the questions that had just crossed my mind and for the first time since waking up, I could feel a genuine fear starting to rise within me. I guess I'd finally processed everything and my emotions were self-correcting to where they should've been from the very beginning. More pressing questions were worming their ways in, too, like wondering what was I going to do about food and shelter. What was I even going to do after we got out of this place? I didn't even know what lay beyond this labyrinth! My gaze fell to the grass between my paws and I started to shiver like a damn chihuahua in a thunderstorm. I could feel my ears pinning themselves against my head and my heart was picking up in tempo. Was I seriously about to have a panic attack right now?

I felt a paw bop me on the head and I looked up to see the Pikachu fixing me with the most serious expression I'd seen on her yet. "Oi, I don't need you shorting out on me right now. This is some crazy shit you're laying out, not gonna lie, but listen—everything will be fine. I can bring you back into town, clean ourselves up nice and proper, get some good food, and spend the rest of the day figuring shit out. How's that sound?"

"...Pretty good," I muttered, taking slow breaths to try and steady myself. "Sorry about that, I guess the gravity of everything just sank in all of a sudden."

The Pikachu's expression softened. "No need to say sorry. It's better than trying to just bottle everything up, or at least that's what I've been told by this Indeedee I know." She turned away and continued walking with her bag. Now let's keep going. If we take any longer, the dungeon will start to affect us again and it'll only be a matter of time before more sex happens."

"And is that necessarily a bad thing?" I inquired, going along with the topic shift. "Because that really was a good time I had. Maybe all those furries online were on to something, hehe."

Poppy chuckled too, though for a different reason. "I have no idea what you're talking about, but no, it isn't a bad thing per se. It's just that I don't have an infinite supply of Oran Berries. If earlier was any indication to you, fainting from post-orgasm exhaustion as opposed to being defeated in battle is a real thing and it happens more often than you think. Even in top condition, most Pokémon with no means of recovery can only climax around three times before passing out."

I nodded, resigning myself to going along with whatever the Pokémon said. She was the expert of this world, after all, so it made sense to defer decisions to her for the time being. We continued down the latest corridor until it gave way to another room. This space was slightly different in that it was much longer than it was wide, with an exit on each of the four walls. We'd entered through one of the narrow ends, meaning there was a lot of space between us and the opposite wall. I got one of those sinking sensations in my stomach upon seeing another one of those stupid purple rats nosing about in the grass. It was practically on the other side of the room and hadn't seemed to spot us yet from where it was nosing around, so maybe we could sneak past it and go for one of the exits on either side of us. I turned to ask Poppy if that was our move but found her already marching ahead, heedless of the other rodent. It was only when she swung her bag off her shoulder and sat it on the ground that I figured out what her intentions were.

"It's time to show you how battling's actually done," she stated, flashing me a toothy grin before turning her focus back to the rat. She cupped her paws to her mouth and shouted in what could only have been a mocking parody of my earlier bout. "Hey, whiskers! Get over here so I can kick your ass!"

I couldn't tell if she was teasing me or just trying to take my mind off things as I'd done for her. Maybe it was a little of both. From the distance, I could make out the purple pipsqueak raise its head and look our way. It was motionless for a few tense moments before scurrying straight at us. Poppy made no move as it approached and I was left wondering just what she was thinking when I caught the subtle glow of her cheeks. It was faint at first, much like when she'd blushed, but it was quickly growing in luminosity, turning a harsh yellow-white that made me think back to the shocks my dick had received. The smell of ionized air was returning and sparks were crawling through her coat once more. My eyes darted between the two rodents as the distance was closed and I spotted the Pikachu flashing another savage grin my way before she unleashed her attack.

Several things happened at once. There was a flash that left me seeing spots as an arc of lightning shot from the electric mouse, accompanied by a loud bang and a buzzing like the sound a transformer made shortly before committing seppuku. After I was able to see again, I stared down at our attacker and swore. "Holy fuck! I think you killed it!"

The purple rat lay prone in the grass, wisps of smoke curling up from burnt fur as it occasionally spasmed. Poppy stepped over and examined it closely, nudging it with her foot. "Nah, she's fine, I can see her breathing," she concluded. "As proud as I am of my Thunderbolt, it'll take a lot more than that from a little ol' Pikachu to outright kill a Pokémon—especially if they're still conscious."

As if to prove her point, the rat began to stir from where she lay as I came over to investigate myself. I looked down at the injured Pokémon and honestly felt a bit bad for the creature. "And you said I got overzealous," I said, glancing back up with a frown. "That was a little unnecessary."

"Hey, I'm just demonstrating how a battle is supposed to be fought," Poppy retorted. Her gaze began to wander and I couldn't help but notice an amused little grin cross her muzzle again. "Aww, she sees a cute boy and all of a sudden she's raring to go."

I followed her gaze down to the rat and felt my stomach lurch. Despite the electrical burns, the rodent had rolled over and was now staring at me with a pleading, if tired, look. It was pretty hard to miss how her hind legs were spread-eagle to present herself. Son of a bitch that was... kinda hot...

"Alright, let's go," Poppy said, turning to head back to her bag and breaking me from my ogling of the injured rodent. "I'm getting tingles downstairs, which means this place is starting to mess with me again. As fun as it would be to have a threesome with you and your new friend, I want to keep going and find the next floor... or any other items to sell."

I nodded, her words bringing attention to my own budding arousal brought on by seeing the feral so willing to be fucked despite the condition she'd been put in. Already I could feel my tool coming to life from within its sheath, getting ready to pop out and say hi to the world at the first chance it got. I turned back to the purple rat and surprised myself by muttering an apology before moving toward the center of the room. While waiting for Poppy to get her bag I took it upon myself to try and decide which of the three exits we should take. Despite how my day had begun and all the questions I still had about myself and this world, I was starting to enjoy myself a little. Maybe I was some sort of gamer as a human because, now that everything had more or less been processed, there was something about crawling around in what amounted to a procedurally-generated dungeon and getting two different kinds of booty that rubbed me the right way. Yay for silver linings!


A/N:

This one came out a bit later than I thought it would. My mind has been frazzled and I've had my thoughts occupied with other things, neither of which are things that lend themselves well to writing. I'll try and do better.