Already Distorted

Pov: Yukino Yukinoshita

The train home was a blur. Emotions obscure ones train of thought and even omits reality as you focus on the origin of your inner thoughts. My mind revolved around the scrabbled words of such a troublesome boy, Hachiman Hikigaya.

"I'll give you everything, so please let me be involved in your life."

Those words I never expected, yet deeply desired to hear kept plaguing my mind. Thinking that he actually saw me in such a way made my heart flutter. Words can not even describe the sensation inside me, it wasn't just the warmness of my body or the increased heart rate. I felt it down to my soul, never in my life has mere words made me feel this way. Nevertheless, they did and I could not be happier.

Buildings passed by as more and more thoughts came to my head. How long did he feel that way? Why did he? Do I deserve him? Whats next? Trying to keep my focus I tugged at my skirt and fiddled with my blazer. These attempts simply failed. Really though, whats next. Would we spend time together?Talk more in an effort to understand each other? I really don't know, I am new to this. My whole life I have been isolated and do not understand how these things tend to progress. Though, the same thing could be said for him, so that makes me feel somewhat better. We would be in this together, and I can not express how ecstatic I am to go forward, with him.

The train pulls up to my stop as a potential issue come to my mind. How would my family take this. As I have been trying to rekindle my relationship with them in an effort to express my desire for my chosen career path, I have been staying at my house for the past week. That means they will probably figure out my relationship with Hikigaya. Hopefully they approve, he is rather crude and misunderstood upon first glance. No matter, that is a problem for another day.

The walk home was similar to the train, his words words kept arising in my head. I could only smile as I approached the door. Upon entering my house I could hear distant chatting coming from the living room.

"I'm home."

"Oh, Yukino welcome home." My mother said as her and Nee-san approached. I hoped to immediately go to my room after after such a mind-blowing day. However, that was no longer an option.

"Ah Yukino-chan did something happen, it's unusual for you to be smiling like that!"

As usual, Haruno sees right though me.

"I... um... nothing in particular I am just in a good mood recently."

"Oh, really... I would would have thought something interesting would have happened on your way home with Hikigaya. I must have been mistaken." She said with a smirk.

"..."

Such a pain she already knows. I just want to go to sleep.

"Please Nee-san, I am truly tired and need to rest."

I walk past them and towards the stairs when my mother asks a troublesome question.

"Yukino dear, I have to ask what is your relation to this Hikigaya boy." She asked in a softer and joyous tone.

"I um.."

I guess it can not be helped, they would find out eventually anyways and it might as well be from me.

"He is my.. we are... partners" I proclaim with a blush.

By now they are both grinning in a relaxed state much to my surprise. Do they approve? By the looks of it I suppose they do, mother would have imitatively intervened if she opposed.

"AWWW! He finally made a move how interesting! What did he say! How did he ask!" Haruno teased excitedly.

"Haruno, please stop bothering Yukino. But I must say he certainly is a interesting individual, do you mind telling me about him." My mother said as she guided me to the living room.

I spent the next 20 minutes explaining my interactions with Hikigaya to them. Needless to say, Haruno got more than her fair share of teasing and mother had more than a few questions. Truly tiresome. One good thing though is that they both are interested in Hikigaya and mother did not say anything that could be considered disapproval. This greatly eased my fear throughout the conversation.

Finally, in my bed ready to collapse. Unexpectedly, I found myself rolling around in the blanket unable to sleep. Of course my thoughts were about him. He is all ready distorting my life. He did say that though, yet I will still blame him for my exhaustion tomorrow. Wait... tomorrow, how would we act? What will happen?

After some time of worrying my thoughts shifted to glee. With a grin, sleep finally took me for a much needed rest.

Pov: Hachiman Hikigaya

"Ahhhhhhhh"

A much needed scream to release my embarrassment. Though not all was wrong, actually, everything went well. Much better than expected in fact. With my smile buried into my pillow I began to ponder, as usual.

I didn't think things would work out so well. Although my message was greatly roundabout and dragged on, it was conveyed. Most importantly mutual. I have never been so grateful that a gamble payed off in my life. The time and effort put into the two proms was a cheap price to have this. The joy of having reciprocated feelings. These unknown emotions to me felt... well right. It's refreshing, like I could breathe smoother and stand with better posture. Can love even make a person healthier? Surely not. But why do I feel like it is?

Wait... love!?

By now I can feel the blood rushing to my cheeks. The realization of my thoughts brought me in state of shock.

Love... Do I Hachiman Hikigaya l-love Yukino Yukinoshita?

After a moment of pondering I deduced that I am not entirely sure if I do. I mean I love Komachi, but... this feels different, something foreign to me. Unexplainable by words and maybe even actions, a feeling I couldn't even understand myself, let alone express to others.

I suppose I can only try. Try to understand. That has been my goal since the start of my unfortunate childhood. I want to understand her. To be there for her, to help her grow and probably grow myself. I want to convey these thoughts to her.

Upon some more thinking I realized I made a tremendous mistake. I can't only want to understand, I also want to be understood. Simply understanding isn't enough. My goal of something genuine can not be complete without mutual understanding. To understand and to be understood. This is what I desire. It doesn't matter if it's everyone but at least with her.

It may be impossible however, I will still try. I need to talk with her sometime about this. That's the only way forward in this path of mine. This path of ours.