C 3

"You minx. Trying to turn a good girl into- into whatever you are."

The words rang through the house as if Mrs. Weasley was the only one there. Rose put a hand on her chest as if to try to suppress the ragged breathing, desperately wishing that she had her wand to put a silencing charm on the room. In an attempt to ground herself she pressed her back against the inside of Tonks's bedroom door, cradling herself.

She closed her eyes and listened to the noise outside. The woman was going on about corruption, perversion, and some other words that ended with - tion, all while screaming about how people like her, like Tonks, were menaces.

"Yes, menaces! And you prey on poor girls like Rosie. Hasn't she been through enough, Nymphadora?" Rose perked up, as a tired but steady voice finally responded.

"Yes.. Don't ya think I know all this Molly?"

Rose could imagine her standing there, in her bathrobe with the same decisive look as before, perhaps with less puffy eyes now. Tears washed away by Rose's hands.

It wasn't like she hadn't been aware of Mrs. Weasley's views on people like Tonks.

Although incest and forced marriages weren't unheard of nor necessarily frowned upon in the original pureblood families ( 'Anything to keep the blood clean') homosexuality had been almost unheard of until the last decade. Perhaps not new, how could it ever be, but something that couldn't be buried anymore now that magazines like The Quibbler had started to report on muggle happenings as well as those in the Wizarding world. While Luna might've always been an outcast, the day the piece on muggle homosexuality and Aids had been published things had gotten so much worse.

Rose buried her face in her hands in an attempt to keep out the rather one-sided shouting that was still going on. She had been a coward when Luna had ended up at Saint mungos and she was a coward now.

"Don't talk back. You will stay away from her, do you hear me Nymphadora? If she ever attempts to speak to you, and god knows she will, the sweet girl has a heart of gold, you will turn her away. You don't get to look at her after what you have brought upon us. Is that understood?" The sound of walking back and forth echoed as Mrs. Weasley's hard sole met the wooden floor with a 'tap'.

" I won't. I will leave, and I wouldn't want to..."

A part of Rose wanted to jump out, stand by Tonks's side and look Mrs. Weasley in the eyes, maybe the auror's hand and- but she wouldn't. She couldn't even entertain the thought of losing the woman who took her in and treated her like her own, much less being the one to cause the break. Rose couldn't even dare, bother, peaking through the keyhole.

She didn't want to see.

"And if she ever comes here, I want you to know that it'll be out of pity. The same goes for Hermione or any of my children. Don't you ever think that she would want someone like you? Ever."

Mrs. Weasley's voice now barely a whisper, strained and filled with seeping poison.

"She deserves a nice boy, someone like my Charlie maybe. Don't think you'll ever be that, love. You're just like every other Black. Filth and self-destruction, so very much like those nasty Lovegoods."

Roses' head was overflowing with thoughts and as the last few words were uttered her mind raced to Sirius. She sighed. Sirius.

" Rose would never get with Charlie, she'd never - "

The sound of skin against skin made Rose hold herself closer, tighter. She wasn't brave, had never been. A chair fell to the floor as the kitchen table scraped against the floor when someone's bodyweight was put on one of its sides.

"Don't you dare, Nymphadora."

The young auror breathed heavily and Rose could identify quiet sobs in the sound.

"Not with that filthy mouth of yours. Working so hard to defile that young girl, are you? I'll make sure to speak to Shaklebolt, so don't expect to have any Auror business to attend to tomorrow or the days after that."

And with that Mrs. Weasley promptly apparated away, the faint pop seeming to pull the plug on the tension that had joined her arrival.

Still with her arms around her knees Rose pressed her ear against the door, listening for crying or maybe a call for her. Something to let her know that the damage could be fixed. Tears can be dried, and calls can be answered but the soft knocking on the door didn't have such simple answers.

"Yes," Rose said quietly, lifting herself up to her knees and then to her feet, grabbing the handle in the process. The hesitation to open was subconscious, yet it didn't pass unnoticed. A heavy weight seemed to have found its way to her gut.

Black strands of hair met her eyes when she finally opened the door, and so did a bitter yet tired hald-smile.

"The color- it's not because of you." Tonks's gaze traveled over Rose, the room, and herself in the mirror by the bed, the smile still glued on her lips although it never really seemed to reach her eyes. As if woken up by a trance she blinked a few times before walking to the bed where she sat down.

" You should probably leave."

They didn't look at each other. Tonks's eyes were on the wall before her and Roses on the other woman's knuckles. White enough to be one with the bathrobe which she was holding onto tightly.

"Tonks I wouldn't let Mrs. Weasley stop me from-"

"But you will. And you should go now better than later. I'll understand, you know, I get it, and I'm sorry for dragging you into this."

The contrast to the crying and cursing woman from before was unsettling. A single tear made its way down her cheek. She brushed it away. Her voice was steady when she continued to explain why it'd be better, in fact so much better, if Rose were to leave, but there was no substance to the words, nothing Rose could hang on to. So she did the next best thing to listen.

Almost on autopilot, she began going through the wardrobe next to the bathroom door. Piece after piece of clothing was pushed aside after having been deemed insufficient until she finally found a thick sweater at the very back of the bunch. After some more looking around Rose had a pile of clothes in her arms. For merely a moment she allowed herself to stop focusing on the task ahead and listened, hoping to hear that Tonks maybe had changed her mind. Silence met her. Hurriedly she turned around, dropping a pair of panties in the process, to find that the young auror was looking at her intently. Her hair was a lighter shade of grey and Rose's heart skipped a beat.

"Here... You'll freeze if you don't put something on soon," she said awkwardly and she could feel her cheeks turn red when she took a few steps towards the bed.

"Thanks" Tonks muttered.

"Would you…Would you like me to leave?"

"No." came the reply a bit too quickly. Tonks looked away.

"Oh, I mean so you could put your clothes on- I'll be just outside if that's okay," Rose said hesitantly, mentally cursing her heart for doing its best to beat out of her chest.

"Oh. Of course. Thanks."

For the second time that day, Rose was leaning against a door with her heart in her throat, only now on the other side. And yet again her mind began working its way up to a panic. It seemed she was only able to be stable if someone else was doing much worse. With a quick glance towards the door she sighed loudly, Hermione had been so right about the savior-complex thing. Moments passed without any sound and a part of her was relieved that it was so. Ignoring the owl at the window who was still hooing angrily Rose attempted to form a sort of coherent plan.

Would she come out? That was the only thing she needed to decide, everything else would fold out by itself after that decision. Whether it was losing or keeping people in her life. She would be okay with losing Neville, Ginny, and Luna she thought, shifting uncomfortably as the last name was added to the list. She would miss them for sure, but their potential departure from her life wouldn't weigh heavier than losing a life with Tonks. But Mrs. Weasley… and Sirius. How could she do something like that to him after everything he'd been through? She pulled at her jumper as anxiety began to rise within, and she turned her face towards the ceiling. How, after almost getting him killed at the department of mystery. The same went for Lupin. She simply couldn't disappoint them that way, she thought, and the lump in her stomach grew even bigger.

"Tonks?" She said, doing her best to make her voice as neutral as possible.

"...Tonks?" She repeated, before opening the door.

The dark brown of her hair didn't quite fit in with all the yellow and pink decorations that covered the room, where she sat on the bed. The robe was off, thrown aside on top of the clothes that Rose had placed carefully beside her. Although it seemed she'd put on the panties as they were missing from the pile.

"Oh- I'll just- Sorry." Blushing hard, Rose looked away, shuffling unsurely, debating whether to leave or not. Before long it was decided for her.

"Please stay, okay?" Tonks didn't look at her directly and instead seemed focused on the doorframe. Her voice sank to a whisper. and her hair flashed red before returning to the rat brown of before. "My hands are shaking too much to put on more clothes." The slight shiver in her voice told the unspoken- she was freezing.

"Would you like me to use your wand to put your clothes on? I'm 'fraid I forgot mine at the burrow."

Tonks shook her head. "Cant. Mine has an anti-share spell on it. A cautionary thing for when we're out doing fieldwork."

"I'm sorry, Rose. " She continued. "You really don't have to be here."

Slowly Rose got closer, cursing herself like so many times that evening for allowing nervousness to get the better of her. She took a deep breath and stood before Tonks with the jumper in her hands.

"Don't worry." She said softly. "of course I'll help you." Slowly she assisted the auror in putting her arms into one sleeve and then another before finally pulling it over her head. Constantly making sure to not let her fingers touch the smooth skin of Tonks's hands, shoulders, and - She didn't look down. Couldn't. Partly because she didn't want the young auror to notice her gaze and think less of her, partly because she didn't trust herself with the image, another one, of tonks nude body on her brain. And maybe because Mrs. Weasley's words on perversion had caught on to her. Rose looked away for a moment to gather herself, before jumping at the realization.

"Tonks, don't you want a bra? Maybe you'd feel more comfortable if I got you one. Wait a second." she said and turned to go look through the drawers again. Although she only managed to take a step before a hand grabbed her wrist, making her tense up instinctively.

A low 'oh' escaped Tonks before she smiled tiredly, shaking her head.

"It's okay, I usually sleep without one anyways."

It didn't escape Rose how her eyes locked on Rose's arm, right where her hand had been, with a hurt look every time she thought Rose's attention was elsewhere.

Soon Tonks was tucked in, although forcibly so, and Rose rested half-sitting, half-lying down beside her on the bed.

"I fucked up."

"Sleep."

"You should go home, Rose. Molly's probably looking for you."

"Sleep."

" Sirius too, you know, he'll be worried."

"And?" Rose said, and put a hand on the bed, patting the space between them in what she hoped was a calming motion. Yet again Tonks took the opportunity to grab her wrist, this time ignoring the reaction.

"You shouldn't even be here, anyone but you. I- Molly isn't wrong, you know. You deserve better than to think that this is something you can save. I'm gonna lose everything and what happened today is just a taste of how I'll spend the rest of my life, Rosie." She bit her lip hard until she winced, before continuing, now with a thick voice.

"I know you don't feel the same, you're good. But you shouldn't even associate with me, to begin with. I'm gonna drag you into my filth and we know it. I know it." A steady stream of tears made their way down her cheek and she brushed them away aggressively. Tonks looked between Rose and the door multiple times, obviously making a point, although she didn't say anything. Merely crying silently.

Then and there Rose could have told her. Her heart was aching to do so. Maybe she could have shouted it, maybe looked deep into Tonks's eyes and said it in a neutral, matter-of-fact tone. Perhaps she could've started crying too, to show just how much she meant it. Say I love you, adore you, or maybe just 'like you'. Anything. But she didn't.

Tonks was far too fragile. It was soon, far too soon, so Rose, as always, did the second best thing, and lied down beside the auror who was becoming undone at her very seams. Gently, she put her hands on warm skin and scooped Tonks into her arms, time and time again checking to make sure that she was comfortable. At first, tonks cried silently, wetting Rose's sweater in the process, but as the night grew darker she began crying harder. Rose whispered soft words into her ear, every time the sobs turned into hyperventilating. Stroking the everchanging hair in an attempt to make Tonks understand just how much she wanted to be there. Just how much she loved her.

After a while, she finally fell asleep. Leaving Rose awake and pressed against the person she'd longed to be next to for years, wondering.

What on earth did she do now?