One week after the war
"Hermione."
She was dying. No, she wasn't dying. Dying would be better.
She was enduring pain. Unimaginable pain. The kind of pain that made her wish she was dying instead.
"Hermione, stop."
Why wouldn't it stop? Why wouldn't Bellatrix stop? Why wouldn't she just kill her already?
"Hermione, please, it's okay, you're okay."
She was screaming. She was screaming and Bellatrix was laughing and she couldn't bear it anymore, she couldn't bear it. Why wouldn't it stop? Why wouldn't it just stop?
"HERMIONE."
She gasped, jerking forward into a sitting position, into a pair of waiting arms beside her.
It took her a moment to register where she was, just a moment for the pale blue walls of the guest room in Andromeda's house to erase Bellatrix's laughing face from her vision.
A moment, in which the sobs tearing from her ruined vocal chords were the only thing she could hear, aside from the fading sounds of Bellatrix's cruel laughter.
She could still feel it though, the pain, as though it were real.
Could still feel the echoes of it coursing through her.
"Hermione, you're okay, you're safe."
Draco's voice dragged her mind back to her surroundings. She needed to focus on what was real.
Draco was real.
His arms holding her tightly against his chest were real.
The moonlight filtering through the curtains and casting a silver sheen over the blue of the walls was real.
The soft bed below her, the sheets she was fisting her hands in, that was real.
Bellatrix was gone.
She was gone.
At least physically.
"Hermione…"
She flinched at the sound of his voice, strong and clear beside her ear. Real. He was real.
"I'm sorry," she whispered. It came out broken, soft. She hated it.
But she couldn't stop herself from repeating it over and over as he rocked her, like a robot, programmed to sound as pathetic as possible.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry…"
He didn't hush her, didn't tell her to stop, didn't mention how small she seemed in that moment. He simply held her, and rocked her, until the silver on the walls had morphed into a buttery yellow with the rising of the sun and her whispers had quieted to silence.
She didn't know what time it was when she finally pushed off of Draco, stretching her aching and tired limbs, stiff from sitting in the same position for so long. He let her go easily. It was one of the things she loved about him.
Ron would have held on, forced her talk about it. But Draco understood her. He knew she would talk when she was ready to talk.
But right now, with her eyes red-rimmed, swollen, and dry from the combination of nearly no sleep and hours of crying, all she wanted was a shower. And coffee.
She would need lots of coffee to get through the day.
Because she couldn't go back to sleep. There was too much to be done. Repairs on the castle were still well under way with quite a bit left to go, the ministry was still in shambles as they tried to figure out exactly how to fix the mess that Voldemort and his cronies had left it in, and they were still trying to get a final headcount of the dead so they could notify families.
And that was just the beginning.
Even if she didn't have all of that… she still didn't know that she'd even be able to go back to sleep, even in the safe light of day.
Everytime she so much as thought of closing her eyes, it was as though she could feel the malice of Bellatrix's memory waiting just beyond the edge of her vision, waiting for the right moment when it could sink its claws back in and rip.
No. Sleep would have to wait.
First, shower. Then coffee. Then food, if she could keep it down.
She felt Draco's hand pass lightly along the small of her back, not pushing, just letting her know he was there, that he cared.
Godric, she loved him.
~.~.~
"Feeling a bit better?"
Hermione sighed contentedly as she dropped into the wooden chair next to Draco at the small table in the dining area.
"Much." She took a deep sip from her coffee, reveling in the warmth that spread through her, washing away the remaining ice from last night's nightmare.
He sent her a quick smile before turning back to the Daily Prophet in his hands.
She knew he tried to hide it, but she could see in the tightness around his eyes, the slight dip to his full lips, that there was likely something about his family in there.
There had been something about his family nearly every day that week. The day of the final battle, his mother, father, aunt, and himself were all mentioned. The next day there was an in-depth article about Bellatrix's war crimes. The three following days discussed Narcissa and Lucius extensively, speculating whether she had simply done the right thing, or whether she was so manipulative and cold that she was willing to give up the man she loved to avoid Azkaban herself.
The previous day had been a detailed article about Lucius' antics in the war.
So she could only assume the trend had continued into this morning's issue of the Prophet.
She reached over and gently plucked the paper from Draco's hands, folding it neatly and sliding it beneath her cup. She didn't look at the section he had been reading. If he wanted to tell her or talk about it, he would. And odds are she would hear about it from someone else that day anyway.
Apparently, the only way to pass time while restoring the castle was to whisper back and forth like a bunch of gossiping busybodies.
"Are you going to be coming with me today?"
He sighed, rubbing his hands across his face as he nodded.
"You don't have to, you know. They don't need to understand."
"So I can be Draco Malfoy, Death Eater son of Death Eaters who also can't be bothered to help clean up his own mess?"
She stared at him for a moment, and though his facial expression betrayed nothing, she could see in the molten silver of his eyes how badly the guilt was eating at him.
"Draco, you helped us. Even if they don't realize it yet, they will. The war would not have been won without you. They will see that."
She stood, walking to him as she spoke so she could lay a hand gently against his pale cheek.
"I will make sure they know that, even if you don't come."
His eyes fluttered closed as he shook his head, the movement settling his skin more solidly against her hand. She stroked once before pulling her hand away, but before she could take a step, his hand caught hers and he was pulling her forward so that she fell onto his lap with an "Oomph."
"I am grateful for you, every day." He murmured against her ear, nuzzling her cheek with his own.
She couldn't help the smile that spread across her face. Everything was horrible at the moment - the clean up, the press, the nightmares. Everything, except Draco.
She would be fine as long as she had him. The thought sent a shiver of warmth down her spine as she tilted her head to catch his lips softly with her own.
"And I, you." Her lips moved against his, and she felt his answering smile before he responded.
"What time do we need to be at the school?" His hand was moving in delicious strokes down her spine, moving further down with each sweeping movement.
"Not for another hour." Her response was somewhat breathless, and his smile turned into a feral grin as he caught her lips again, wasting no time before sliding his tongue between them to sweep through her mouth in strokes that sent heat right to her core.
She slid her arms around his neck, tangling her fingers in the strands at the nape. His own hands slid around her waist, and he lifted her just enough to sit her on the table beside them. His mouth drifted from her lips to trail kisses down her neck, to her collarbone, where he nipped softly. He gripped the edge of her shirt but pulled back to meet her eyes, seeking approval before he moved forward any further.
She nodded wordlessly, lifting her arms so he could tug the garment over her head, leaving her bare save for the thin cotton shorts she still wore. One hand slipped below the waistband of her bottoms, causing her to let out a breathy moan that he caught with his mouth as it met hers again.
His other hand dragged down her chest, leaving a trail of goose pimples across her flesh before he flicked one of her nipples, causing another strangled groan to spill from her mouth into his.
She slid her hands down his chest to the waistband of his joggers, pushing them down impatiently before she pulled away from him to push off her own shorts.
He stepped out of his pants, and stood there, beautiful and bare, while he took a moment to rove his eyes hungrily down her form.
She wasn't used to it still, that look of complete and utter want in his face when he looked at her. She'd never had that before. Had rarely ever truly felt beautiful before. But he made her feel like maybe, just maybe, she was someone worth that look.
It was enough to prevent her from covering her bare body, though that was still her instinct as she sat naked before him.
"I love this," he murmured as he stepped back towards her, dragging his fingertips across her flushed cheek, before sliding it behind her back to support her as he gently laid her back across the table.
He stood over her, moving his hands further down to grip her bottom as he angled her hips. Cool eyes met warm ones, as he slid slowly into her, eliciting a gasp from her and a delightful groan from himself.
Her back arched as she desperately tried to move against him, but he just chuckled, gripping her hips more tightly as he stood still, buried within her and refusing to move.
She glared at him, biting her lip hard enough to bruise, to stop the needy whimper that threatened to escape. He waited for her to still, gripping her skin hard enough that she knew there would be faint markings of his fingertips if she glanced at her ass in the mirror later.
But Godric if that didn't make her want this more.
Finally, finally, he began to move. He pulled back before thrusting forward again tauntingly slow.
She couldn't help it, no longer able to keep the sounds within her as she moaned loudly.
He pulled back again, then pushed forward with agonizing, mouthwatering, slowness.
He did this two more times before Hermione finally caved.
"Draco, please."
It seemed that was all he had been waiting for.
His hips snapped forward so quickly it made her gasp.
He began to move at an almost punishing pace, slamming into her hard enough that had he not been holding onto her hips, she would have slid back across the table. Her moans were coming regularly now, and she could feel the exquisite pressure begin to build as she inched towards climax.
Her arms were above her, and her hands were gripping the edge of the table for support as she writhed against Draco, meeting his thrusts with her own small movements, as much as she could with him holding her in place.
One of his hands let go of her hip to move between them, rubbing his thumb over her clit in small circles that sent waves of sharp pleasure through her.
She was so fucking close.
"Come for me, Hermione."
That did it.
She fell over the edge of the precipice, crying out as the orgasm tore through her. She clenched around Draco, and the "Fuck," he hissed through his teeth was all she needed to know his realease was only seconds behind hers.
He fell forward onto his forearms, supporting his weight so his torso hovered mere centimeters over her own. His panting breaths mingled with hers, causing the sweat dampened skin of their chests to brush against each other slightly with every rise.
They stayed like that for minutes, until their breathing calmed, and he pulled out of her with a groan before brushing his lips across hers in a sweet kiss.
Merlin, she loved this man.
He smiled down at her, his eyes trailing down her body much like they did before they had made love, though the ravenous desire had been replaced with pure adoration brightening his silver eyes so they practically shone.
She pushed up until she was sitting and caught a glimpse of her reflection in the window behind Draco, causing her to laugh as she took in her mussed hair and damp skin.
"I think I may need to take another shower."
He grinned, "Mind if I join you?"
She batted his arm with her hand, hopping off the table as she responded, "I think that may defeat the purpose."
He laughed, holding up his hands innocently. "I promise to keep it clean."
She rolled her eyes at the pun but slipped her hand into his to pull him along with her as she headed back towards the bathroom to take her second shower of the morning.
She marveled at how much lighter she felt, how easily he could change her mood around from haunted to happy, and in that moment, she knew that she would never regret one bit of how they found each other, would do it all over again if it meant that she would have this for a long, long time.