A/N: If any language seems a bit off it's probably because I'm Norwegian, but you'll survive I'm sure :)
Any faults in the legal proceedings will 100% be blamed on the corruption of Magical Britain.
"Identification papers, please." said a wizard in the Azkaban guard uniform.
Remus dug his hand into his abnormally large jacket pocket and retrieved a muggle passport and a small piece of paper. The guard snatched the identification from his shaking hands and looked them over for a long minute. "Remus John Lupin, eh?"
Remus nodded.
"Wha' business 'ave an unemployed fellah like yeh go' 'ere?" the guard studied the small paper carefully. "Yeh know we only allow entrance fer ministry officials."
Remus retrieved an additional paper from his pocket and handed it to the guard. "Business on behalf of Dumbledore."
The guard's eyebrows rose higher and higher as he reached the end of the text and after a while, finally nodded. "Well, tha' should be all in order. Follo' me." He turned around and began walking briskly without waiting for Remus, who despite his long legs had to jog to keep up with the guard.
The closer they came to the entrance, the colder it got, and Remus had to fight the urge to run away as old memories threatened to resurface. By a doorway blocked by a stream of water, the guard finally stopped. "Now all yeh'll do is walk through the stream – reveals disguises, yeh see – and I'll show ye ter the cell. Yeh'll 'ave this back o'course," he gave back the muggle passport and the small piece of paper but pocketed Dumbledore's letter. "I'll keep this fer the visitors' records."
"Right," Remus nodded.
"Yeh better keep yer wand ready," the guard wearily regarded a nearby dementor. "Jus' in case." He walked through the stream of water, once again not waiting for Remus, appearing keen to get the matter over with quickly. After a moment's hesitation, Remus followed.
The watery stream had done him no harm, but when he had appeared on the other side, his clothes clung tight to his skin in their wet state. He quickly cast drying and warming spells, but though his body was warm, the coldness in his mind had reached an unprecedented level. He shivered as memories of his transformations and the horrors of the war resurfaced.
The guard regarded him for a moment before handing him a small square of chocolate.
Remus ate it hungrily knowing that it would help him like no other thing. "They will nah harm yeh, but yeh'll be wise ter never lower yer wand. Good thing if yeh know the Patronus charm..." he ascended the stairs, skipping every other step, Remus following quickly behind.
After climbing seven flights of stairs, the guard stopped and briskly walked down the hall to his right until he had reached its end, all the while appearing to never notice the loud screams echoing through the hall. He fumbled with his keys and then proceeded to unlock the cell door, behind which was a worn-down stone stair. At the bottom, Remus spotted a malnourished body with long black hair. Sirius.
Sirius looked up at the sound of the key turning. "Visitor fer yeh, Black." Announced the guard before turning to Remus, "I'll leave yeh to it. Send a red spark if yeh need help. A green when ye're done."
Remus walked through the open door, flinching slightly as the door shut loudly behind him and locked him inside the cell of his former friend, turned traitor.
Sirius regarded him carefully with his grey eyes that not so many years ago had regarded him with such love. He seemed incapable of speech, though Remus had heard rumours of him screaming all day for a trial to prove his innocence.
Remus was the one who broke the silence as he slowly descended the stair and sat down on a step midway down, "Finally the flesh resembles the madness within." He said with disgust.
He was quiet for a while before he asked what had been plaguing his mind for so long, "Do you feel any regret for what you did to them? To me?"
Sirius looked down before he stood up, causing Remus to stand up to. "I regret it every bloody day, Remus... but please." He said weakly, "I'm innocent!"
Remus scoffed, "Save your lies, Black." Sirius opened his mouth as though ready to speak, but Remus spoke before he could string together a sentence. "Lily and James are dead because of you." he said harshly.
Instead of hanging his head as he had done in their school years, Sirius fixed his gaze determinedly at Remus's eyes. Remus looked away. "I don't deny it..." he said after a while. "It's all my fault really."
Fire rose in Remus's throat as the confession confirmed the story that he had been told by the rest of the world. "But?" he forced his voice to remain calm.
"I didn't betray them, I swear! It was Peter –." Sirius started, already losing his calm, but Remus interrupted him.
"Don't you dare blame this on poor Peter whom you murdered." His eyes blazed in anger. "Together with 12 other innocent people too!"
Sirius laughed, "PETER? INNOCENT? He was the secret keeper, Remus! It's a pity he decided to blow himself up when I approached him, really! I should have killed him myself!"
"Azkaban has clearly deluded your mind to the point of convincing yourself of baseless lies!" Remus spat. "You know, I came here to see if, perhaps, you'd at least be honest with your former friend, but clearly you're a worse person than I had ever imagined." He turned to leave, unable to take the pain anymore.
"Remus, no!" Sirius leaped forward and caught hold of the hem of Remus's trousers. Remus quickly turned back to see a flash of desperation flash before Sirius's eyes. Though he denied it to himself, he felt a pang of pity for him.
"Then tell the truth." Remus said resolutely.
Sirius swallowed. "A week before their...deaths" he choked on the word. "They approached me, requesting I be their secret keeper. I told them Peter would be a safer option; no one would suspect Peter before me. They agreed and performed the spell with Peter... and so you see it was, really, my fault that they picked him..." Sirius went silent, tears falling freely from his eyes.
"And?" Remus said through gritted teeth.
"Peter had been acting odd for a while, you must recall, and on the night, I went to check on him and he was gone, without any signs of a struggle... I immediately went to Godric's Hollow. Hagrid was there with Harry, refusing to give him to me – his godfather!"
"Might have something to do with you killing his parents, don't you think?" Remus spat.
Sirius winced but continued through gritted teeth as he recalled his memories. "I didn't think; I was so angry... I went to find Peter. I found him after a while and the bastard declared that I was the traitor before blowing up the entire street and himself."
Finally, Sirius hung his head, his entire body shaking. Remus's body too began to shake, though in anger. How dare Sirius cry at the consequences of his own actions? He had betrayed Lily and James and now he sat on the stair crying? "And then you laughed! Laughed at your murders?"
Sirius looked up at Remus with sore eyes, "You have to believe me, Remus! You're my only hope! I swear I'm innocent! Please!" Sirius took hold of both of Remus's legs and cried against them.
"Get off me!" Remus spat, kicking Sirius away who then rolled down the stair to where he had sat at the beginning of their meeting. He looked up at Remus with hurt in his eyes and despite himself, Remus wanted to run down to Sirius to tend to his bruises and tell him how sorry he was. But, no, he reminded himself, he was completely justified in hurting Sirius. He had, after all, betrayed them all.
"We're done here." Remus said resolutely, shooting a spark of green up the stairs. "You refuse to tell me the truth. Good-bye."
He had reached the top of the stairs when he heard a hoarse whisper, "Is Harry alright?"
"Never you mind." Remus spat back, but when the guard unlocked the door for him, he turned around for the last time, "You know, I really had hoped that our time together had meant enough for you to at least be truthful to me, but I suppose that was all pretend?"
"Please, no! I've told you the truth, Remus, please! Don't leave me here!" Sirius began running up the stairs with a slight limp. "I would have died before betraying my friends!"
Remus shot a spell at Sirius which prevented him from coming any nearer. "I've heard enough of your lies for a lifetime. Honestly, to think I thought I knew you!"
The cell door closed behind him and Sirius was left alone, muttering to himself for a while before transforming into Padfoot with his tail between his legs.
——
"Funny seein' yeh again! Most don't come at all, bu' 'ere yeh are again!" greeted the Guard upon Remus's second visit that month.
"Dumbledore's orders." Remus said crossly, handing the guard another one of Dumbledore's letters.
"C'mon then." said the guard and walked him through the watery stream, up the stairs and down the hall. The coldness of the dementors pressed harder this time and Remus broke off two pieces of chocolate from a bar he had brought with him in his pocket.
The guard unlocked the door and Remus walked down the stairs, hearing a loud bang behind him, which he recognised as the door closing and locking.
Sirius raised an eyebrow as he saw who had entered his cell.
"Dumbledore's orders." Remus said as way of explaining, crossing his arms across his chest. "He seems to think that we should gather evidence for a trial. Justice and all that." Reluctantly, he handed Sirius a small piece of chocolate.
Sirius muttered a thanks and ate it hungrily with a tiny light of something appearing in his cold grey eyes. "I'll have a trial then?" Sirius asked.
"Probably not. The ministry's keen to avoid anything to do with the war, but nevertheless, Dumbledore'd like for me to write down your side of the story." He sat down on a cold step. "Proceed."
Sirius retold his story and Remus's quill began acting of its own accord, getting down every word. To Remus's dismay, it was the same lie that he had been told the last time.
"Don't you feel that you owe them the truth?" Remus said once Sirius had finished.
Sirius blinked, "This is the truth."
"Then why did you laugh?"
Sirius thought for a moment. "I knew that unassuming, cowardly Peter had outwitted me. He framed me and made sure I'd end up here."
"And that's funny to you?" Remus asked.
"No. Not at all." Sirius said, picking at his filthy robes. "It was ironic." To Remus's disgust, Sirius began laughing, seemingly unable to stop.
"You're barmy." Remus said. "Honestly, it's sickening that you not only lie about this whole thing and then you laugh at it again!"
Remus walked up the stair with the echoes of Sirius's laughter ringing in his ears.
——
"Bloody 'ell, you must 'ave lost yer mind to return again!" said the guard on Remus's third visit.
"Yeah, yeah." he handed the guard another one of Dumbledore's letters without much decorum.
They went through the same routine of briskly walking through the prison until they reached Sirius's cell. "Good luck," muttered the guard before he locked the door behind Remus.
"You've come back?" croaked Sirius from the bottom of the stair.
"Unwillingly." Remus replied, walking slowly towards Sirius, ignoring the hurt expression on Sirius's face.
"What does Dumbledore want now?"
"Possible evidence." Remus said simply.
"Like my lack of a dark mark, perhaps?" Sirius said dryly, rolling up his sleeve to expose his left forearm which did indeed lack any traces of the dark mark.
Remus sighed. "They could argue that a spy wouldn't have a mark because it defeats the secrecy."
"Ask my neighbour then – Bellatrix Lestrange – she'll gladly confirm my loyalties."
"She's insane and probably wouldn't know either way."
"Pessimistic attitude you've got."
"It's your word against a crowd of witnesses!" snapped Remus.
"We could re-examine their memories then..." Sirius said to himself more than to Remus.
"They've been obliviated." Remus added.
Sirius thought for a long while, opening and closing his mouth occasionally, as though ready to introduce a new idea.
"Wonderful defence you've got then!" Remus said after a while, "Not even able to think of any proper evidence when all else points at you."
"Examine my wand then!" Sirius snapped. "it'll tell you as I've told you millions of times that I'm innocent! There can't be a trace of a blasting curse there because I haven't cast one! Perhaps it'll even show that I've never taken part in a Fidelius charm too!"
"They did do that! Did you smoke your sock? You were there!" Remus snapped back. "Everything points at you being guilty! Do us a service and just admit your guilt!"
Sirius's eyes darted back and forth in the room, "They didn't examine it though..." he said quietly. "They snapped it right in front of my eyes."
Remus furrowed his eyebrows, "It's in the bloody report! You can't blatantly lie like this."
"I'm not though." Sirius said quietly.
"And yet you have nothing to prove for it!" Remus said, rubbing the bridge of his nose. "I carried their coffins, wept on their graves, spent money I could have used to buy myself a proper dinner to decorate their graves with flowers, never complaining...Can't you swallow your pride and tell the truth for once?"
"Merlin, Remus!" Sirius said defeated. "It's like you've stuffed socks in your ears or something! I'm telling the truth." He looked over at the wall embellished with deep counting lines that were too many to count. "Veritaserum then?"
Remus went quiet. Veritaserum was rare, but strictly controlled by the Ministry. Why hadn't they reached that idea yet? It certainly couldn't be for lack of potioneers as even Sirius had made one for his Advanced Potions classes – and Sirius was hardly a master potioneer. But then again there hadn't been a trial...
"Perhaps..." Remus sighed, sitting down, hands on his knees. "Are you a proficient Occlumens or Legilimens?"
"Not strong enough to withstand the Veritaserum, though I imagine they could check me for that?" Sirius said hopefully.
"Yeah, you'd have to be Albus Dumbledore to withstand a strong dosage..." Remus muttered conflicted. He knew that a great injustice had been committed in depriving Sirius of a trial. But Sirius had betrayed Lily, James, and Peter. Sirius had killed 12 muggles, laughing about it even. And yet a tiny part of him couldn't believe it – wouldn't believe it. How could Sirius – who had tended to Remus's wounds with such care and who had cried because of his family – be evil? It couldn't be... Had none of it been real?
Remus's jaw tightened and his vision became blurry. "I'll find a way to get you a trial..."
Sirius's eyes lit up.
"If only to do justice to our – my friends' memories. At least the world will know with certainty who killed them."
Remus stood up, gazing at the sorry figure of his former friend for a while and then turned around and left, not hearing the barely audible 'sorry'.
——
"Yer back wi' company then?" the guard asked when Remus returned to Azkaban for the fourth time, looking peaky.
"Yes," Remus said, looking over at the Auror.
"We have an order of transfer of a Sirius Orion Black to the Ministry of Magic cells whilst he awaits trial." said Auror Proudfoot, handing the guard an official paper sealed with the crest of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement.
"Righ'" the guard said after reading the paper. "Follo' me."
The full moon was but a half day away and if possible, the screams from the prisoners seemed louder and more desperate this time around. A thick mist of desperation and misery seemed to float in the air and Remus shuddered as they walked through the prison. The memories of the transformations, death, war, and fights came back to him stronger than ever, and he broke off a generous square of his chocolate bar and bit into it.
The guard unlocked the door to Sirius's cell, stepped back and indicated for Auror Proudfoot to retrieve the prisoner. Auror Proudfoot walked quietly down the stairs, his wand tightly gripped in his left hand. "Sirius Black, if you please follow me." He said when he was a couple of feet away from Sirius.
"What?" muttered Sirius.
"We're transferring you to a Ministry of Magic cell where you will stay whilst awaiting your trial." Proudfoot said, extending his hand to help Sirius up on his feet. "If you please hold out your hands..." Sirius held out his hand which were quickly tied together with a rope after Proudfoot nonverbally conjured them.
Sirius looked up the stairs and met Remus's cold and tired gaze, "How?" he asked weakly as he reached the top of the stairs.
"Hired a solicitor. Quite genius to use a combination of muggle and magical laws. Dark wizards may not have a right to a trial, but British citizens certainly do. You are a British citizen as well as a magical one." Remus said, shrugging. "Besides, they couldn't risk you getting a muggle trial..."
Sirius looked curiously around as they walked down the corridor, a look of recognition on his face. He almost stopped by a cell where a particularly mad scream sounded. Though no one else noticed, Sirius stuck out his index and middle finger and showed it to the prisoner, 'up yours' it seemed to say, and then Remus realised that the prisoner was Bellatrix Lestrange.
Despite the cold shower of water drenching Sirius top to toe, Remus couldn't help but notice that the man grew a couple of inches and a look of momentary happiness on his face. Sirius took a deep breath, looked up at the bright cloudy sky and it seemed as though a great weight had been lifted from his shoulders.
Then they disapparated with a loud crack, appearing in a fireplace in the atrium of the Ministry of Magic. It was completely abandoned and every step they took echoed through the great room.
The lift took them to level nine, whereupon they walked down the stairs to level ten wherein the Detention Area could be found, though it hadn't been used in great frequency owing to the desperation of the Wizarding War that had resulted in a mass number of prisoners being directly sent to Azkaban in fears of the prisoners escaping from the dementor-free and more relaxed cells in the Ministry of Magic. And Merlin forbid what would happen with a Death Eater escape in the heart of the ministry.
"In you get," said Proudfoot, leading Sirius into the sparse cell. Proudfoot locked the door and turned to a small table with a thick registry book. He retrieved a pen from his pocket and began writing down details such as name, date of birth, sex, nationality and so on... but at date of entry, his pen hovered and he glanced over at Remus, "D'you remember the date today?"
Remus being quite reliant on the keeping of dates naturally knew what day it was, but before he had time to answer, someone else answered, "The 4th of May 1985."
Sirius had answered the question.
Remus's gaze darted to the cell. Sirius who hadn't seen sunlight since 2. November 1981 had known the date. And then he remembered the counting lines covering the walls in the Azkaban cell. Sirius had been counting all the days he had been imprisoned.
Proudfoot looked over at Remus as though to verify that it was indeed correct. Remus nodded and Proudfoot resumed his writing.
"You reckon he's innocent then, Lupin?" Proudfoot inquired on their way back up the stairs.
"I don't know..." Remus said truthfully.
"You went through all that trouble for 'I don't know'?" Proudfoot laughed.
It was true that it hadn't been an easy feat to arrange a trial. There was the Enabling Acts that saw Barty Crouch Sr. passing laws right and left (that in any other circumstance would be beyond illegal) to suppress the Death Eater menace. It wasn't unusual for witches and wizards at that time to end up with lifetime in Azkaban without so much as a chance to argue. Unfortunately, some of the laws passed then were unchanged, and so the only chance left had been to threaten with muggle means. Means that would breach the Statue of Secrecy a thousand times over.
"But surely you're not blind to the overwhelming evidence against him?" Proudfoot inquired as they stepped into the lift.
"'Course I'm not." Remus sighed. "Though I believe the lack of trial is at worst criminal and at best childish."
"It was entirely legal." Proudfoot said sternly.
"But should it have been?" Remus countered. "He committed the crime after the war when the Enabling Act was no longer valid and in most cases, you'd think prisoners would get a chance to have a trial at least after the end of the war. Honestly, it's positively medieval – the muggles have progressed far beyond that point, but wizards seem unable to progress past the eighteenth century. And their view on magical crea–"
"Now there's no point in getting political." Proudfoot said coolly.
Remus rolled his eyes. "That's precisely the problem." He muttered through gritted teeth.
"What's that?" Proudfoot asked, not hearing what Remus had said.
The lift stopped on level eight and the doors opened.
"Nothing of importance. Good-bye." He said and walked out of the lift and into the empty atrium.
——
Remus's entire body ached as he ran down the stairs to level 10 of the Ministry of Magic. The night's transformation had been one of the worse and he had woken up with his shoulder dislocated, several broken bones, a large gash across his torso, and a rather nasty hip. Being a werewolf for 20 years had, however, resulted in the knowledge of quite a few healing spells and potions, and so his bones were unbroken, his shoulder put back into place, and his gash (hidden under layers of bandages) healed to appear a week older than it was. Yet his body was terribly sore, and his energy drained from the exhaustion of the transformation.
He was one of the last to enter the court room and sat down in the first empty seat he could find. He broken out into a cold sweat in his run owing to his ill health, so he wiped his forehead with the back of his hand thanking Merlin that he hadn't received a new addition to his face scars that night.
After a while, the door to the court room burst open and in entered two Aurors dragging Sirius inside. Sirius looked to be in an awful state – his head seemingly too heavy to keep upright and his body so famished that it shook with the weight of every step. Remus wondered what had changed during the night, he was sure that Sirius had looked much better even in Azkaban.
For a moment, the image of Sirius's battered body emerging in Potter house after suffering several rounds of the Cruciatus curse by his family's hands came to Remus's mind. Sirius had been starved for the summer holidays and had seemed so weak and tired, but that was nothing to what he looked like in the present.
But this had been deserved, Remus reminded himself. Sirius had murdered 15 people; punishment was necessary in such circumstances. And yet Remus couldn't help but feel compassion for Sirius. And with compassion meant suffering with someone (the root "passio" meaning suffering) and in this, Remus thought he could feel every pain inflicted upon Sirius as though his own. It was like Sirius's nerves were directly connected with Remus's brain.
Remus shuddered; one man's pain was enough for him.
The Aurors bound Sirius to the chair in the centre of the room and withdrew to the shadows of the room.
Amelia Bones cleared her throat and called for the room to quiet. "Murder trial on the sixteenth of May 1985 into the offences committed under the Decree of Homicide, the Decree of association with terrorist organisations with magical aid, the Decree of safety of the nation of Magical Britain, and the Stature of Secrecy by Sirius Orion Black, resident of Azkaban."
"Interrogator: Amelia Susan Bones, Head of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement. Court scribe: Ebenezer Smith. Defence: Helena Montague. Prosecution: Corban Yaxley."
Madam Bones found a paper on her desk and began reading, "The charges against the accused are as follows:
"That he knowingly, deliberately and in full awareness of the illegality of his actions joined the ranks of the Death Eaters serving as their spy, revealing vital information about the resistance, the ministry, and the kingdom itself, which constitutes and offence under Paragraph C of the Decree of association with Terrorist Organisations with magical aid and Paragraph A of the Decree of the Safety of the Nation of Magical Britain.
"That he of his own free will revealed the location of the Potters of Godric's Hollow to Voldemort leading to their murder, which constitutes and offence under Paragraph B of the Decree of Homicide.
"That he, following the murders of the Potters of Godric's Hollow, blew up a busy muggle street on the second of November 1981 at twenty minutes past three, resulting in the deaths of twelve muggles and one wizard, Peter Pettigrew, Order of Merlin First Class, which constitutes an offence under Paragraph A of the Decree of Homicide and Section 13 of the International Confederation of Warlocks' Statue of Secrecy" Madam Bones looked up from the sheet of parchment.
The Aurors re-emerged from the shadows and the tallest of the pair uncorked a small vial containing a clear liquid. "Do you consent to the use of Veritaserum, Mr Black?"
"Yes." Sirius said weakly and opened his mouth. The Auror tilted the vial and three drops of the liquid fell on Sirius's tongue. He swallowed and looked back up at Madam Bones.
"You are Sirius Orion Black of Azkaban, previously of L. cottage, Yorkshire?" she asked.
"Yes." Sirius said, looking over at Remus who in his pain didn't notice.
"Mr Black, you pleaded not guilty?" she said, looking down on Sirius.
Sirius looked away from Remus and cleared his throat, "Yes."
"And what do you plead now?"
"Not guilty."
Madam Bones nodded, "Were you ever in contact with the Death Eaters or Voldemort?"
"Yes, fighting them." Sirius said dryly.
"But your family had ties to them?"
"Yes."
"But you did not?"
Sirius gritted his teeth, "No. They disowned me."
Madam Bones turned her head to the jury and received a piece of parchment. "But you are still the heir?"
"No. I'm a Black in name only. My brother became the heir."
Madam Bones received another sheet of parchment. "You were reinstated in '79."
Sirius furrowed his brow. This was apparently as new to him as it was to Remus who had comforted him the day that his face had been blasted off the Black Family Tree. "I didn't know."
"Very –"
"–The Prosecution would like to bring in a witness, Madam Bones." Yaxley interrupted.
Madam Bones nodded.
The door to the courtroom opened and in walked the last person Remus would imagine Sirius would like to see. Or perhaps he would like to see her? This Sirius wasn't the same Sirius as the one he had known in '76 who had all but cursed his mother.
"Calling in witness Walburga Black. Mother of the accused."
Walburga pursed her thin lips and scowled at the assembly of people – probably disgusted at the variation of blood purity in the room, Remus thought. Not to mention the sight of a half-breed. Him.
Yaxley conjured a comfortable chair besides Sirius's. Walburga sat down and for the first time in Remus's life, he thought he saw the woman smile in pride. And then he knew. Walburga was under the impression that her remaining son had found his path to the dark side – the right side in her mind – after all. How proud she must have been when she had heard of his betrayal.
Sirius shrank at the sight of his mother.
"Full name?" Madam Bones inquired.
"Walburga Black." She said with her head held high. She looked like a bigoted Victorian Aristocrat's wife who'd been forced to interact with peasants.
She looked over her shoulder and stared Sirius in the eyes. Grey to grey. Sirius shrank a little more, and then to Remus's surprise she took his hand and stroked it with affection, whispering something.
Sirius entire body seemed to tense – from top to toe – unable to react to what had happened.
Perhaps it was his surprise at his mother showing a shred of affection to him after all those years? Or perhaps it was the lack of intimacy from years in Azkaban that had made physical touch foreign to his body?
Remus couldn't help but get angry at the sight. Here was Walburga Black playing the part of the doting mother in front of the greater part of the Wizengamot after spending the greater part of Sirius's adolescence abusing and torturing him. Or perhaps that had all been a ruse to make the Gryffindors embrace Sirius so he could play the part of a spy...
"Mrs Black, is it true that you disowned the accused, your son?" Yaxley asked.
Walburga poised herself and looked directly up at Madam Bones, "Yes. In '76."
"And is it also true that you reinstated the accused in '79?" Yaxley continued.
"Yes."
"And was that due to any change in his loyalties?"
Remus shifted in his seat, leaning forward a little in anticipation.
Walburga blinked, looked over at Sirius and then back at Madam Bones, ignoring the presence of Yaxley. "No."
"And did the loyalties of the accused change after his reinstatement?" Yaxley pried further.
"I didn't –" Sirius began but was silenced by Yaxley.
Walburga sighed as though she had just been given a rather disappointing Christmas present. "I would not know. Spies are secret."
"So, are you confirming the accused became a spy for the benefit of–" Yaxley cringed as he forced his mouth to form the word, "Voldemort?"
Walburga finally looked over at Yaxley, looking as though he had just told her that two plus two equals twenty-two. "No, Yaxley," she said sweetly, "I am stating that my son is accused of being a spy and that I would never have known it to be true or false. I was never a Death Eater." She rolled up the sleeve of her dress to expose the naked skin of her forearm – unmarked. "Be that as it may, I have not seen my son since '76. Even a mother's intuition cannot be strong enough to discover what an entire Ministry and resistance did not – if the accusations are believed to be true, of course."
Yaxley scowled at Walburga as though deprived of a promised treat. "That is all, Mrs Black. You may leave." He walked over to her, took her by the arm and hissed at her the whole way to the door. Walburga, however, seemed to have become temporarily deaf and didn't take notice of it.
"Moving on..." Madam Bones said quietly, "You were approached with the question of become the Potters' secret keeper?"
It took Sirius a moment to react, he seemed completely lost in his thoughts. "Yes."
"And did you accept?"
Sirius looked blankly at Madam Bones, "No." he said thickly.
Madam Bones turned to the jury and received an additional sheet of parchment, clearing her throat as though ready to change the subject. But before she could utter a word, Sirius continued, "I suggested Peter Pettigrew to the Potters. They cast the spell that night without anyone else knowing. We knew there was a spy in the ranks, but no one suspected Peter..."
Madam Bones leaned forward, intrigued, "And so it was Peter Pettigrew who betrayed the Potters then?"
Sirius nodded, "Yes."
Ebenezer Smith's quill made loud scratching noises against the parchment he was writing on.
"That was why I cornered him."
"The official report of the incidence reports Peter Pettigrew shouting that it was you – Sirius Black – who had betrayed the Potters followed by you exploding the street, killing no less then twelve muggles and Pettigrew himself... do you claim to have a different story, Mr Black?"
"Yes."
Madam Bones looked through her pile of parchments and found a sheet of lined paper that Remus immediately recognised as the copy he had made for her.
"It says here that the accused cornered Peter Pettigrew on a city street whereupon Pettigrew shouted that it was the accused – Sirius Black – who had betrayed the Potters of Godric's Hollow and proceeded to explode the entire street killing twelve muggles and himself." Madam Bones looked up from the paper, "Is this the story to which you are referring, Mr Black?"
"Yes." Nodded Sirius.
"Objection!" Yaxley exclaimed. "Peter Pettigrew was unarmed, something which the surviving muggles testified to."
Helena Montague rose from her chair, toppling it in the process, "Defence would like to bring forward evidence to support the accused's claims."
Following a curt nod from Madam Bones, Montague summoned a pensieve and poured from a vial, silvery hairs of a memory. Her wand touched the image in the pensieve, and the memory extended so that all the people in the court room could see.
When the time came for the explosion, Montague paused the memory and pointed her wand at the memory, making the image focus on the wand behind Pettigrew's back. She resumed the memory, and it was clear to anyone with functioning eyes that the spell had been cast from Pettigrew's wand – especially when the memory was watched again, focusing on Sirius who had not as much as muttered a single spell throughout the entire discourse.
Remus felt his heart skip a beat. It became clearer and clearer to him what had been the truth all along. And yet a part of him that had grown accustomed at being angry with Sirius for the last four and a half years told him it couldn't be true. It was too absurd. But there it was, the evidence that another part of him had yearned for.
"Objection!" cried Yaxley, "Memories can be tampered with when extracted."
"And who said this memory belonged to Sirius Black?" Montague retorted, shoving the empty vial into his hands. "Go on, read the words." She crossed her arms.
Yaxley's eyes widened and read aloud, "Anne Pinckney: surviving muggle, later obliviated."
"Poor Anne Pickney was in all likelihood not biased in favour of the person whom she believed to have murdered her daughter, Elenora Pinckney."
Yaxley thrust the vial into Montague's hands and through gritted teeth said, "The accused's loyalties to" he cringed again. "Voldemort are still under doubt."
Montague turned to Sirius, "Have you ever been a Death Eater, Mr Black?"
"No." Sirius said loudly so that the entire court room could hear it clearly.
"Do you mind showing us your forearms?" Montague went on.
Sirius shrugged, "Go ahead."
Montague rolled up Sirius's filthy sleeves. Save for the filth his body had accumulated after years in Azkaban, his arms were, as Remus had already known, bare.
"A wizard can be loyal to the Death Eaters without bearing their mark. This proves nothing."
Sirius suddenly boomed, "And you'd know all about that wouldn't you, Yaxley?"
Yaxley stiffened. "My loyalty is to the Ministry, Mr Black."
"The mark on your forea –"
Sirius stopped when he saw the glare he received from Montague. Her face very clearly told him to shut it before he got into trouble.
Madam Bones chose to ignore the scuffle, "Mr Black, you have under the influence of Veritaserum confessed to the Wizengamot your innocence. The Wizengamot will soon reach their verdict."
The Wizengamot began whispering and Remus could see from where he sat the nervousness of his former friend quite clearly. There seemed to be moments when Sirius was about to speak up, but he always stopped at the sight of Montague's determined expression.
Then the whispering stopped. Remus looked expectantly at the Wizengamot.
"Those in favour of clearing the accused of all charges?" said Madam Bones's booming voice.
More than half of the Wizengamot raised their hands. Sirius's mouth opened wide.
"And those in favour of conviction?"
Half a dozen wizards raised their hands.
Remus's heart beat fast and hard in his chest. His mind was desperately conflicted. One part – the one that had grown used to the idea of Sirius betraying them all – wanted to yell out that they were all wrong in letting a traitor go lose and that they were all making a great mistake. And yet the other part – that had desperately clung to the happy memories of his youth – wanted to jump up and down in excitement and relief. He did neither and remained seated with his hands tightly gripping the edge of his seat.
"Sirius Black is henceforth cleared of all charges." Madam Bones declared.
Remus couldn't bring himself to look at Sirius while he was being unchained and led out of the room presumably to fill out some paperwork or possibly compensation for his years of imprisonment in Azkaban. Montague seemed to have followed Sirius out of the room because when Remus finally looked to the middle of the room, she was gone.
The room had all but cleared when Remus finally got to his feet, wincing at the pain it caused his body to do such a basic thing. He started at a slow pace, the pain in his limbs and chest following his every move, and after a while picked up speed as his body grew less tense with the movement.
Outside in the hall, Remus spotted Walburga waiting. He passed her and walked out of the Ministry, his entire body yearning for rest.
——
"Are you family?" asked the healer.
Remus frowned. What about the publicly broadcasted trial had assured anyone that Sirius Black had any blood relatives that could be considered any sort of proper family? Who would visit him then? His abusive mother?
"As good as." Remus said.
"I'm sorry but only family can be allowed entry." The healer said looking not all sorry.
"Bloody hell..." Remus whispered under his breath as he took a deep breath and prepared for saying something he really didn't want to say or at the very least exploit. "Look, I'm his boyfriend, okay? Isn't that good enough?" He hadn't technically lied. They had never technically broken up.
"Fine," The healer rolled his eyes, bored. "I don't get paid enough for this" he whispered under his breath.
Remus didn't waste a second and burst through the door before he could properly think about what could possibly meet him on the other side of the door.
Nothing, however, could have prepared him for the sight that he beheld when he stepped inside the room. In the middle of the room lied Sirius, waxy, malnourished, and asleep; no one had seemed to bother with cutting or combing his long and dishevelled hair that had once been his pride and joy. On either side of the bed sat Walburga Black with embroidery in hand and his ancient grandfather Arcturus Black who held a copy of the Daily Prophet in his hands.
They seemed to have been deep in conversation before Remus had burst in.
Walburga scowled at him. Arcturus regarded him with a curious yet bored gaze.
"It is family only." hissed Walburga Black.
"That's rich," Remus remarked coolly. "Considering how you've treated him you'd think you were nothing of the sort."
Walburga seemed to rise several inches, "How dare you insult your betters?"
Remus chuckled drily, "Funny. You're better for torturing your son? You must be off your rocker."
Walburga's eyes blazed, "Filthy half-breed, how dare you –"
"Cut it, Walburga." Arcturus interrupted looking up from the paper. "You make fools of us all."
Remus stopped in his tracks. He had been ready to argue back to Walburga but then to his great surprise, her father-in-law/first cousin once removed had shut her up. He couldn't help but admire the man.
"I apologise profusely on behalf of my daughter, Mr Lupin. She ought to know when to hold her tongue." Arcturus eyed Walburga scornfully. "The Noble and Most Ancient House of Black extends our deepest gratitude for your effort in freeing its heir. Please sit."
Walburga opened her mouth to say something, but Arcturus gave her a look over his paper that made her stop.
Remus's admiration for Arcturus faltered when the ancient man talked about Sirius as a pawn in a chess game but decided that it was best that he too held his tongue. Arcturus was in fact quite the intimidating figure. Despite his great age, he was dressed as a regal duke who with the wave of a hand could change the entire course of history if he so desired.
Remus sat a little distance away from Arcturus. They were all quiet for a while.
"Walburga, would you mind leaving?" Arcturus said after a while.
Walburga looked up from her embroidery with a frown. "He is my son!" she hissed. "I will not leave him."
"Walburga." Arcturus said warningly.
Remus never thought he'd see the Black family matriarch shrink from anyone, but that she did.
Walburga stood, packed her embroidery into a small purse and walked out with a scowl on her face. The door shut with a bang and as if on cue, Sirius opened an eye carefully regarding his company before sitting up in the bed. "Thank Merlin she's gone."
Arcturus folded his papers in half and sighed.
"Why d'you even let her in?" Sirius asked.
"You were perfectly capable of pretending to be asleep." Arcturus said, a hint of a smile appearing on his lips.
Sirius shrugged and found a chocolate frog on the on the bedside table which he took a large bite of.
Remus eyed the pair curiously. They seemed civil.
Sirius swallowed and gazed at Remus almost without blinking. "I –" he began.
Arcturus looked between the pair, placed his papers under his arm, stood and bid farewell to the pair. The door closed carefully after him but, in the distance, Remus swore, he could hear him yell out "Walburga, quit the foolishness."
"Thank you." Sirius whispered. Something seemed to weigh on him.
Remus smiled slightly before he grew serious, "Sirius?"
"Hm?" Sirius took a bite of his chocolate frog.
The question had bothered him for the better part of the last few days, "The reason you never told me about the switch..."
Sirius swallowed hard, looking apprehensively at Remus.
"I assume it was because you thought I was the spy?"
Sirius seemed to sink a little into the mattress. "Forgive me, Remus. Please..."
Remus didn't know what had possessed him; perhaps it was the time he had had to think while recuperating from his transformation or perhaps that he was tired of being alone, but he swallowed his pride and anger. "Of course." He smiled sadly, happy to at least know the truth.
Sirius smiled back in relief.
"And will you, in turn, forgive me for believing you were the spy?" Remus asked.
"Of course." Sirius said and the ghost of a grin flitted over his gaunt face.
"Do you hate it terribly here?" Remus asked after a moment's silence where Sirius had looked anxiously about the room.
Sirius smiled. "I'll take anything before Azkaban, but..."
"It's awfully closed off?" Remus guessed, remembering the brief happiness on Sirius's face when he had looked up at the clouded sky and breathed in fresh air.
Sirius nodded.
"Perhaps I'll bully the healer into releasing you?" Remus suggested.
Sirius nodded only too eagerly, desperate to see sunshine after so many years in darkness.
Remus hadn't bullied the healer for more than the better half of an hour before he was finally allowed to sign the paperwork (against medical advice) that allowed him to walk out of St. Mungo's with Sirius.
They apparated outside Lupin cottage. For a May Day it was awfully warm, but Sirius seemed to relish in the heat. "Hike?" he asked.
"Sure." Remus smiled.
Sirius had ended up borrowing a pair of shorts, an old t-shirt and a cardigan, a pair of shoes and some socks. They walked aimlessly in the countryside in quiet. Remus had to wipe his forehead free of sweat occasionally due to the heat, but Sirius in his thin state seemed to shiver at the slightest breeze. He had never thought that the day would come where he was in better health than Sirius; he had always been the cold one, always the first to gasp for air when exercising.
"Sirius?" said Remus when they had walked for a few hours.
"Yeah?" Sirius squinted at him in the sun; his gaunt face seeming fuller in the light.
"Your mother...?"
"Has suddenly taken a liking to me because she believes I turned to the dark side or some bullshit?" Sirius sighed. "Yeah, the hag never leaves me now. Grandfather's not much better, never was, but at least he's civil."
Remus frowned slightly in confusion. Sirius had never been any sort of diplomatic when it came to his family, not even when they were eleven and their relationship wasn't hostile had Sirius always complained about them.
"Grandfather has never been so bad really. Or maybe he's worse than the rest really ..." Sirius went on after a moment's silence. "He's a staunch believer in blood purity, but above all he believed in the future of the family. The political future that is."
Remus's frown deepened.
"While Mother could disinherit me as much as she wanted, I would always be the Black heir, my grandfather's heir. He wanted the family to be secure, you see, and so when the war really broke out, he took a few measures to ensure that the Black family would survive no matter the outcome. One brother on either side." Sirius crossed his arms across his chest to keep warm as they passed a particularly windy spot. "I don't know what that makes him honestly..."
"Awful?" Remus supplied.
"Yeah, I suppose so." Sirius said thoughtfully.
They walked on for another hour when Sirius had grown so tired from the exercise that he fell over. He had thrown a stone angrily at the ground and went quiet, his shoulders shaking.
Remus bent down and pressed a reassuring hand on Sirius's back and that seemed to have done it. Sirius's quiet sobs turned to soft cries, and then to sobs. His entire body shook and in between the sobs, Remus thought he could hear Sirius cursing his family for what they'd done to him and how his life had turned out.
Remus inched closer to Sirius and embraced him. The mutterings continued for a while and then Sirius went quiet and limp in his embrace; too tired to cry.
"Why is it that when I'm supposed to be happy..." Sirius said weakly. "I'm too tired? Too angry?"
"I don't know." Remus said, feeling a twinge of guilt for not helping Sirius earlier. Perhaps if he had helped him earlier, he wouldn't be too tired? But Sirius had been tired for a long while before he'd been imprisoned.
Remus reached inside his jacket pocket and broke off a square of chocolate and placed it in Sirius's hand. Sirius made a noise like a half-laugh half-sob and looked up at Remus with shiny eyes, "Merlin, Moony..."
A smile spread across Remus's face. "Let's go home, yeah?"
Sirius blinked a little, perhaps attempting to conceal his obvious tears. "Yeah."
Remus took his hand and suddenly with a pop they were at the cottage.
Sirius fell to the ground, dizzy. "Bloody hell, Moony! Count next time!"
"Git." Remus laughed, helping Sirius up.
The sun was low on the sky making it appear a delightful shade of orange. Sirius's eyes glistened in the light. He looked beautiful despite the toll Azkaban had taken on his health. Remus's gaze moved to Sirius's mop of black matted hair that had once been his pride and joy. Something definitely had to be done about that unfortunate sight, Remus decided. He walked over to the shed and came out with a camping chair.
Sirius frowned, "What's that about?" he asked as Remus unfolded the chair.
"You're getting a haircut." Remus said determinedly as he summoned a scissor from the bathroom, a comb and bottles of shampoo and conditioner.
Sirius seemed to consider him for a moment. In the past, he would never have let Remus come near him with a scissor for fear of him mucking up his hair. But he seemed to have figured that his hair couldn't really get much worse. Shaving it off would be better than leaving it be. And so, he shrugged and sat down in the chair, "Fine. Just don't cut off my ears."
"No promises." Remus said
Most of the hair would have to go, Remus decided as he eyed the mess that was Sirius's hair. He began by cutting off all the hair below the shoulders and then began a desperate attempt at untangling the knots.
They were quiet for a long while: Remus combing through Sirius's hair with copious amounts of conditioner and occasionally cutting off unsalvageable parts.
"Remus?" Sirius asked after a while, his eyes squinting at the setting sun.
"Yeah?" Remus said, concentrated on a particularly difficult section.
"I talked to Dumbledore after the trial to thank him..."
Remus froze.
Sirius turned around to look at him. "But he didn't know what I was talking about... In fact, he knew nothing about you visiting me in Azkaban..."
Remus laughed forcedly, "Old man must be off his rocker."
He knew Sirius would see straight through him.
"Moony, you terrible liar." Sirius smiled. "You were always good at forging signatures, weren't you?"
Remus flushed red, "No idea what you're talking about."
Sirius turned around with a smile, "Thank you." he whispered.
Remus flushed a deeper shade of red but resumed separating Sirius's jet-black locks with great care.
——
Sirius had lived at Lupin cottage for a few days when Remus found him sitting in the kitchen/living room with their old photo album. Judging by where the album was opened, it was near the end. 1981.
Remus sat down next to Sirius to get a closer look. The photograph was of Harry stumbling after the Potter cat with James and Lily laughing in the background. His stomach fell at the sight. Most days he had tried to forget the life and friends he had had before 31. October 1981, but now he found himself wondering what had become of the little boy.
Sirius seemed to have had the same thought, "D'you know if he's alright?"
Remus sighed, "No. I know nothing really. Dumbledore's been tight-lipped about the whole thing."
Sirius frowned, "Where is he?"
"Lily's sister." Remus said.
Something flashed in Sirius's eyes. He slammed the album shut and jumped from the sofa with renewed energy. "Right, get up, Moony. We're getting the poor thing." He crossed the room briskly, put on the jacket that had hung on the stair railing, laced up his shoes and went to open the door.
"We can't just pick him up!" Remus said, walking after Sirius.
Sirius turned around, "Why not?"
"Well, for one thing," Remus said as he put on his own jacket. "His aunt and uncle have custody of him."
Sirius arched his brow. "And I'm his godfather. Chop, chop!"
"And Dumbledore was adamant he remains there." Remus stepped into his worn shoes.
"But you don't give a damn?" Sirius asked, watching as Remus found his wand on a small table.
Remus flashed him a smile. "To hell with Dumbledore." He walked up to Sirius, ruffled up his hair and put an arm around him. Sirius's eyes seemed awfully bright; indeed, his whole face had lit up in a way it had only done in his youth.
Sirius regarded him, meeting his gaze.
And then without planning it and without thinking of what would happen with them after: Remus kissed Sirius with a smile.
Sirius's eyes widened before his mouth broke out into a grin and he kissed him back.
"Three... two... one..." Remus said between breaths.
Pop! and they were gone. Surely the sudden apparition would earn him a slap on the head, but Remus couldn't care less.
Either way, the sight they would see in a few minutes time would leave no room for anything else.