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Gibbs grumbled to Rachel about the group therapy session that she had organised for him with Tobias and Tim. She had explained to him, that he held some residual jealousy towards them because of the friendship that Tim and Tobias now shared. That he needed to clear the air with Tim as well. She suggested that Director Vance could sit in too. To demonstrate to him that Gibbs was trying to repair his relationship with Tim. "You should think about making your apology while Vance is present." She told him. "It would go a long way into showing Vance that you're willing to work past it and that you are learning from this."
Rachel had spoken with both Tobias and Tim and it was agreed that they should conduct their mini group therapy session in a neutral spot it wasn't fair to Gibbs to have their new familial connection shoved in his face by holding it at Tobias' family home. It wasn't fair to Tim to have to face Gibbs in Gibbs' home either. It seemed a little unorthodox to hold it in a meeting room at NCIS because not all of the issues were work related. Finally it was agreed that it should be held in Rachel's office, somewhere that was just deemed to be neutral territory. Scheduled their meeting for the following afternoon.
"1300 hours sharp!" She told Gibbs. " I am prepared for this meeting to go well into the evening, as there are plenty of issues that need to be bought to the surface and dealt with in a timely manner, in order for things to go back to a new normal. Attendance is mandatory, Gibbs."
Rachel had cleared her schedule and set it up with all involved. She set up some tissues and some water bottles on the table. Hot coffee was brewing on the side table along with a fruit platter in the bar fridge she kept in the corner of the conference room. She didn't normally go to so much effort, but Gibbs and Tim were her sister's team. Kate'd have never let it get this far and it was up to Rachel to fix this, for her.
Vance arrived first, then Tobias, Gibbs arrived next and lastly Tim. "Sorry I'm late, I was meeting someone for lunch and it ran over." He said as he rushed into the room, taking a seat next to his father. Tobias leant over to Tim and gently pulled the collar of his shirt back to see the lipstick marks on the edge of his collar and trailing down his neck. Gibbs and Vance also noticed, Gibbs smiled at that. He was glad Tim was seeing someone new. "Before you say anything, it wasn't a date." He told Tobias and Vance.
"That was from a 'not a date', what the hell do you do on a date then?" Vance retorted with a chuckle. He had actually been thinking that but the retort had just slipped out.
"Ok gentlemen, leave Tim alone. We aren't here to discuss his dating habits or his sex life." Rachel said cutting into the conversation. "Let's start, shall we? Who would like to begin?"
"I think I should after all. It's my fault we're all here." Gibbs said firmly, without hesitation. "I'm aware that I owe, a lot of people an apology. A blanket apology is unacceptable, because if you're going to break your own rules, you may as well obliterate them too." Gibbs took a deep breath, steadying himself. "Tim, I owe you the biggest apology of all. I also need to make amends for my actions. You have no reason to believe me, or even trust that what I'm saying is the truth. You trusted me and I let you down. I admit, I have a problem with being overprotective with people - women, in particular. I do it with Abby the most and I don't even realise I'm doing it. I find myself getting angry at you, if Abby is and that's not fair on you. You didn't do anything wrong and I took my frustration out of you. First, I shouldn't have never let my feelings for Abby cloud my judgment." He took a small sip of water. "A simple I'm sorry can't erase what I did, but I am truly sorry. I didn't even question why you were coming down from upstairs, as opposed to coming in late. I am still processing what else happened. I value your friendship and I miss it. I am trying to better myself, I am not ready for any kind of forgiveness, so I am not asking for it yet, just know that I am truly sorry."
"He hadn't been to bed, yet. Agent Jackson had discovered the MTAC feed had been hacked on a digital security sweep just after 2310 hours. We called Tim in and he arrived at 2356, according to security logs and immediately went to work in MTAC." Vance explained to Gibbs, answering his question.
"He was just heading to bed when the call came in, I offered to take him in because I knew that your team had worked two back to back cases without going home, in the three days prior. He was asleep on his feet, I walked him in too, but as it was after hours Keith wouldn't let me in. So, I just dropped him in at the navy yard and returned home." Fornell added. He was still angry with Gibbs. It was a pretty half hearted attempt at an apology, that Gibbs had given him
"When Tim had come downstairs. I had ordered him to find coffee, fill you in and then get some sleep in that order." Vance added, "he was following a direct order from me."
"I'm sorry, I was pissed off. I had just spent three weeks listening to Abby prattle on about you and then I came in and you were late. It's not an excuse and its not ok. The mistake was mine and I'm owning it." Gibbs admitted.
"Before Gibbs and Tim really hash this out, is there any other pertinent information that the people of this room need to know?" Rachel asked, looking at Tim and Tobias directly.
"I suppose I should tell you that my DNA results are in, Gibbs." Tim finally spoke up. "Turns out being my father, was just as a huge surprise for me, as it was for him too. Turns out I know him, you do too." Tim said with a nervous laugh.
"Congratulations, Tim. That's great news, I am truly happy for you." Tim wasn't paying attention anymore and Gibbs mistook this pause for something else entirely. "Not me, surely it's not me. Oh god?! Am I your father?!" Gibbs put his head in his hands.
"It's not you," Tobias leaned across to his friend, "get your head outta your ass. Tim, you ok?" He noticed Tim was really struggling.
"Tim?" Vance asked, getting concerned too. This was unlike Tim, he knew the firm and confident NCIS agent, not the scared and panicked little boy he saw in the conference room before him.
Beads of sweat were rolling down his face, his heart was racing, his hands shaking. He was frozen on the spot. Gibbs looked up to see Tim standing. 'Tim was going to create a safe path to get away from me. Oh god, who is it?' He thought. 'It's got to be bad, if he thinks he needs one.' He watched as Tim paced himself back against the wall, feeling it's support behind him, he lowered his body to the floor and attempted to curl himself up in a ball. By now his breathing was coming in fast gasps and tears were uncontrollably falling down from the young man's eyes.
"Tim, this is a safe space." Rachel's voice tried cutting through his mind. "No one's going to hurt you, here. Listen to my voice Tim. You're ok."
Gibbs watched on, he did this. He felt the guilt in his gut and he knew he caused this. He watched as his youngest and brightest agent was in the beginnings of some kind of attack. By the time Tim had hit the wall, Tim was flanked by Rachel and Vance. Tobias stood in front of him, calling his name. Over and over again.
"I'm going to take Tim out into the hall to compose himself." Tobias told Rachel as Vance helped him get Tim to his feet and out into the hall.
Leaving Tobias alone with Tim in the hallway, Vance promptly returned. "What's happening with Tim?" Gibbs asked, greatly concerned. He wanted to help comfort Tim, but he knew his presence in the young man's personal space wouldn't be welcome. "Leon, why the hell is he still in the field with attacks like that?" Gibbs asked, having noticed Tim was still wearing his SIG.
"He has never had one … whatever that was. He's never had one before, that I know of." Vance explained his answer before turning to Rachel. "Just what was that?"
"I'd say it was a panic or anxiety attack bought on by a trigger." Rachel answered Vance.
"Looked like a PTSD flashback to me." Gibbs added, "I'd recognise it, anywhere. Hell, I've been there."
"Gibbs may be right, or it may be just an anxiety attack." Rachel closed her eyes, pinching the bridge of her nose tightly. "Before this incident between Tim and Gibbs, I had noticed something slightly brewing. I was planning to bring Tim in for a private session. Then all this blew up and I focused on you."
"He was spiralling?" Vance asked, trying to see how he had missed it. He couldn't see it, so voiced his question.
"Did you ever meet my sister, Kate? I mean, Agent Todd?" Vance shook his head, no. Gibbs looked up at the doc, as did Tobias. "Kate first introduced me to Tim at my graduation from Georgetown U when I got my doctorate, he was also graduating. We'd actually shared a few classes, but never met." Gibbs eyes widened at that, he didn't know his youngest agent went to Georgetown U, as well as MIT and Johns Hopkins. "She invited him to join us at dinner with us to celebrate, she told him how proud she was of him. She hadn't known he was going for his doctorate. He held up his hand and stopped her compliments. He told Kate that if he had of told them, would Tony and Gibbs have supported him, like she was? She thought about it and shook her head no. My sister was always so sure of herself and at that point, she reverted back to an unsure and timid five year old."
"Tim has a doctorate?" Gibbs asked, shocked. He didn't know, but he remembered a few cases where Tim had theorised a scenario and he and the team had dismissed his theory only for it to eventuate. Tim had never even gloated over it. Right now, he hated himself more than he did before this meeting began.
"In Justice and Criminology, actually." Tobias answered as he entered the room. "He's ok, now. He's on the phone with the 'not a date' girl, calming himself down. Told him to take five, then come back in." Gibbs noticed that Vance let off a grin at Tobias and Tobias returned it widely. Now he knew, he was officially out of the loop.
"I've work with a few of his fellow graduates at the Bureau and when I found out, I discreetly asked around. Tim was top of his class, graduated with honours. He had invitations from almost the entire alphabet soup. Let me tell you how surprised I was when AD Sweeney informed me that NCIS hadn't made him an offer when he graduated. Their own agent, all that brain power, talent and skill. Hell, I get orders every week from my boss, to offer Tim a job. Until two weeks ago, I followed them."
"What changed, Tobias?" Gibbs asked and Vance smiled "You're generally pretty good at following your boss' orders, except when it comes to working with me."
"The job offers from the FBI haven't stopped." Tim said coming back in the room, more together and in control than when he'd been escorted out. They just come in a more formal packet and are directed to the Director's office and given to me via Vance now.
"You asked what changed, Gibbs?" Tobias voiced, echoing Gibbs. "I told AD Sweeney that my son wouldn't take an offer of employment from his father."
"Your son?" Gibbs repeated. "As in? For real, like Emily is your daughter?"
"She's my half sister." Tim confirmed.
"Tim's mother was a girl I knew from home. We had a brief fling, it didn't work out. She was really into naval officers. We briefly … "
"Very briefly" Tim interrupted with a feigned cough. Tobias gave his son a pointed look and grinned at his son.
"Very briefly" he amended and Gibbs smiled at that. "Reconnected before I never spoke to her again. I saw her once more, from a distance. When I was working in the Seattle office, she was pregnant and coming out of the public library with a young boy in tow."
"Why didn't you just ask your mother who he was? Why run an expensive DNA test?" Gibbs asked, curiously. "If we were investigating this like a case, we'd have spoken with your mother."
"His stepfather wasn't a nice man, I imagine he was horrible to live with too." Tobias explained and Vance agreed, having met the Admiral before.
"My mum left him, took Sarah and ran. Left me because, well … like father, like son, according to her." Tim explained softly and he heard Gibbs curse. Gibbs hated parents that abandoned their children like that. "From the DNA results, I found out she remarried in '91 to some real estate tycoon from Texas. She was with him until she died on 9/11." Vance put his hand on Tim's back in a show of support and urging the young agent to continue. "In 9/11" he amended. "Vance helped me out with tracking down more information about her. She and her husband were visiting New York to see his brother, from Dallas where they lived, when the planes hit. Her husband's brother had taken them to see the world trade centre. Her body was partially recovered. Nothing of him was recovered."
"Oh Tim," Gibbs breathed out sympathetically. He slowly came around the table to his face his former agent. He knew now that Tim would never work directly for him again. He took the young man's appearance in. Gently and slowly, giving him a chance to pull away, he rested his hand on his forearm. "You still have your Dad, Tobias. He is still here and no doubt wants a relationship as your father too." Gibbs looked up at Tobias. "If he doesn't well …"
"He does." Tobias growled at Gibbs, interrupting him. He knew that Gibbs was going to offer. "Don't ever question it, Gibbs. I'd do anything to have known about Tim and to get that time back I missed with him."
"I'm happy for you both." Gibbs said pulling Tobias in for a half hug and patting Tim's arm, not daring to try and hug him. "You have time, Tobias. He's here, living and breathing, unlike Kelly."
"How's that make you feel, Gibbs?" Rachel asked him.
"I'm not jealous, if that's what you thinking. Hell, I am happy for them both. This makes me happy, it makes Tim my pseudo nephew. Just as Em is my niece." Gibbs explained, "but it also makes my actions worse."
"When you return from your suspension, I'll resign from the team. I'm sure Jackson would love to have me back in the basement." Tim offered, genuinely. "You're a good field agent despite what happened between us."
"Actually, don't resign yourself back to the basement. Balboa and his team are transferring to Diego Garcia and Tim, I have assigned you to the new team that will reside where Balboa's team sat. You are assigned as SFA, you will stand in as SSAIC temporarily until we find the right team leader, you will report to me. We have a meeting later this week to discuss who else will be joining your team." Vance informed him, "I originally slated to keep another MCRT team member with you, but based on the last case we worked together. I think you're ready to move away from it, might even be good for you."
"Congratulations, Tim." Gibbs said softly. "I am proud of you, ya know that right?" Tim shook his head, no. He didn't know that. His boss had never even given him a job well done before.
Rachel had called a quick break, she hadn't had a cigarette in nearly twenty years, but so far this afternoon, she was so frustrated that she was almost tempted to go and purchase a pack and start up again. She had retreated to her inner office and locked the door behind her, finding a minute of solitude.
Tobias checked in with his agents for an update, Sacks was leading the team and they were on a hot case.
Vance checked in with his PA before booting up his laptop, opening his email and actioning some emails that required his immediate attention.
Leaving Tim and Gibbs alone together in the room. "Can we talk?" Gibbs whispered at him. "I hate that I've hurt you like I did. As I said, I'm sorry and I don't expect your forgiveness."
"I'm only hearing you out because I don't want my Dad to lose his best friend. You mean too much to him." Tim told him, with a firm tone.
"Tobias is lucky to have a son like you." Gibbs told him. "Does everyone else know?" He asked the agent he'd known since he was a green rookie.
"No, I wouldn't do that to you." Tim told him, not that he deserved that kind of respect. "We have told Vance, AD Sweeney at the FBI, Diane and Emily, that's it. Kind of want you to be there when I tell the rest of the team. They take their cues from you on how to react in most situations and your reaction sways theirs. It'd be much smoother if you're there, too."
"Of course I'll have your back." Gibbs told him, offering a handshake. "I promise. I will do anything to help regain your trust again." He told Tim as he grasped the older man's hand.
"I accept your apology, but do understand that I can not forgive you, yet." Tim told him. "I'm not ready, but maybe one day I will be." Gibbs readily nodding, in agreement and for the first time today, he felt like he had made some headway with Tim.
Before, one by one, they departed for the evening. Vance had a political working dinner at the senate, grumbling about the rubber chicken dinner that awaited him before he left. Fornell asked his son if he was home for dinner tonight and Tim declined, stating he was meeting a 'friend' for a drink and a movie, before leaving Gibbs and Fornell alone in the car park. "Has Tim been seeing his girl long?" Gibbs asked the father of his former agent.
"Not very long, its pretty new. They're calling it 'not dating', but they're definitely getting together more frequently in recent days." Fornell told his friend. "She knows me and I know her, but she knows me as Agent Fornell - Tim's friend, not as Tobias - Tim's father."
"I get what you're not saying, so its obvious she works with either Tim or with you." Gibbs verbally confirmed with a raised eyebrow. "A fellow agent or ... perhaps it's the analyst. There's one on our floor that's always hovering nearby when we hit the gym, she always makes her way through our bullpen, not Balboa's on the way to MTAC." Gibbs said, thinking of the short blonde that's always eyeing Tim off from afar. He couldn't remember her name, but he knew she'd shot DiNozzo down as quick as he'd got up to bat, when he'd asked her out.
"I'm not telling you who she works for, or what her job is. I am pretty sure that you know her too and I'm not going to betray my son's trust in me." Tobias vowed to Gibbs and Gibbs silently agreed. He knew he was in no position to try and convince his friend to reveal her identity. He had to regain Tim's father's trust, just as much as he had to regain Tim's trust.
"That's fine." Gibbs agreed, "Dinner?" He offered and Fornell had agreed, following Gibbs' truck to Gibbs' usual diner.