Hi there!

Thanks again for all the lovely reviews! It surely made my day!
And sorry that I caused some of you to have sleep deprivation, but if it helps, I too loses lots of sleep writing this story :P because time flies when you having fun... and before you know it, it's already late at night.

Chapter 19: Self-reflection

He lay in the water with his chin resting on his folded arms over the edge of the lake. His gaze lingered on the girl in front of him and smiled. He was so happy she was here. She noticed he was looking at her and smiled back as she took off her hair bands and shook her head, her hair waving gracefully with her movements. Videl was so beautiful with her hair down that Gohan couldn't describe her as anything other than a goddess. She crossed her arms and pulled her shirt over her head. The half-Saiyan put his head down as she did so and dreamily took her in. She was still wearing her black spandex shorts with a matching sports bra, but the sight of her exposed, well-toned belly was enough to spark new feelings. She approached him and slowly lowered herself into the water.

"It's truly beautiful out here," she commented as she sat down next to him.

His eyes were still on the girl. "Not as beautiful as you," he chuckled at his own cheesy remark. His face softened, "This here means a lot to me, it's kind of my sacred place, a place with most of my scarce fond memories. I came here with my father to fish, with my little brother to play and," he lingered in her gorgeous blue eyes, "well, I hope to make some new memories with you here too." He blushed as he said that and moved his body to face her. He tucked some of her hair behind her ear and leaned over for a kiss. But before their lips met, the sky darkened as storm clouds began to block the clear blue sky. Rain came pouring down and Gohan looked up as a bolt of lightning revealed a silhouette in the sky.

"No!"

Gohan jumped out of the water and floated three feet in the air between the intruder and Videl. Another bolt of lightning showed the devilish expression of the crossed-armed figure as his spiky upright hair swayed in the rising wind.

"Vegeta, leave me alone!" he yelled at him, fear gripped his voice.

"I came here to kill you, brat," Vegeta's evil laugh echoed through the skies as he pointed his finger at him and, without much warning, he fired a powerful Ki-blast.

Gohan crossed his arms to defend himself, but before the blast hit him, Videl had thrown herself in front to protect the one she loved, hitting her right in the heart. Her limp body fell into the water and the clear surface turned red with blood.

"NO!" screamed the half-Saiyan in sheer horror as he dove after her. He pulled her body out of the water and turned her around, hoping there was still something he could do to save her. But the glimmer of hope faded when he saw a gaping hole in her chest. He looked into her now hollow eyes and cupped her face with trembling hands as tears streamed down his. "Please! Please, don't leave me! I'm begging you, don't leave me like the rest! I need you, I need you so much," he sobbed as he pressed her limp body against his and rested his forehead on hers, "Don't leave me…"

A loud bang and another flash of light woke him up from his nightmare. His body was still trampling and his face was wet with real tears. Panting heavily, he sat up and buried his face in his big hands. Not this again! Ever since he'd said goodbye to her, she clouded his dreams, and the longer he was away from her, the darker they grew, giving him sleepless nights.

It was still dark outside, but since he couldn't sleep anymore, he'd better train. He left the cave he had sheltered for the past two weeks and walked past some old skeletal remains. Like every day, he stopped at its skull and bowed down in tribute to the very first being he'd considered a friend. He then jumped several miles and ended up on top of one of the mesas that scattered the area. Gohan had returned to Piccolo's training grounds, the grounds where his warrior life had begun and now would continue. He closed his eyes and with a powerful scream he turned to Super Saiyan, drying his wet - now golden - hair from the rain, and started his morning routine.

With trembling knees, he fell to the ground, his body spent, unable to maintain his Super Saiyan form anymore. He had lost track of time during the intense workout and hadn't eaten all day. His stomach growled in protest and he pressed his left hand against it to calm it down. He wasn't that far from his trusty old berry tree, so he got up with difficulty and stumbled towards it. After picking and eating a few hands of those berries, he sighed. This was no longer satisfying, he had to eat something more substantial if he wanted to continue his training.

After gaining enough energy from his berry-appetizer, he flew to a nearby area and landed next to a boulder. In his memory this rock was a lot bigger, realizing how much he had grown since the last time he was here, and he lowered his pants to take a leak on it. When he was done, he jumped onto one of the nearby mountains and waited. He didn't have to wait that long, and soon giant footsteps rumbled across the valley. As expected, it came sniffing for the new intruder in its territory.

"Hey, remember me?" shouted Gohan down.

The Tyrannosaurus rex looked up at the sound and visibly stiffened. Gohan smirked: oh yes, he remembered him! The animal turned its heels and tried to flee, but the half-Saiyan was too fast for him. With one blow, he knocked the beast unconscious, and with a move he'd learned from Krillin long ago - the destructo disk - he cut off a respectable portion of its already shortened tail. Normally he wasn't this savage, he respected nature in every way, but he had a personal grudge against this one, because it had killed his long-lost animal friend. Cutting off part of its tail wouldn't kill him, he knew that as he'd done it many times in the past, but at least he had something to eat other than berries. After his meal, he yawned from a mixture of contentment and sleep deprivation. His body felt heavy, but he forced himself to go back training until late into the night.

Too tired to fly, he walked back home from his training grounds. This was usually when he heard all kinds of voices he knew weren't there. Mostly it was Vegeta's, berating him and challenging the half-Saiyan to fight him, but also Videl's, screaming for his help. Sometimes he would react to them, as they became too real to ignore or sounded so close that his reflexes kicked in, even knocking down some trees in the process. He didn't know how late it was when he got back to his cave, but it didn't matter, because he probably wouldn't sleep through the night anyway.

This routine would go on for several days - except hunting down the T-Rex as Gohan took pity on the creature - and the young Saiyan found himself lying on his back after one of his intense training sessions. He had been fighting his shadow all day in Super Saiyan 2 until his body collapsed. He felt so tired, maybe, just maybe, he needed to get some sleep. He didn't care that he was laying in the middle of nowhere, exposed to whatever could come to harm him. But when he closed his eyes, a great shadow fell over him, forcing him to open them again.

"If you go on like this, you'll probably die from exhaustion."

Gohan's eyes shot up to the big green giant towering over him, offering a hand to help him up. He accepted and proceeded to sit up, looking into Piccolo's concerned eyes. The Namekian decided to sit opposite to him and they both remained silent for a moment.

"Care to explain why you're doing this to yourself?"

Gohan looked at the ground, he didn't know how to explain it without causing a commotion. He hadn't told anyone about Vegeta's threats because he feared it would cause panic that would escalate before he was fully back in shape. But again, he now felt stronger than ever and he could use the advice or even a training partner. He looked back up, facing his sensei.

"I simply felt the need to get stronger," he said, hoping this would satisfy Piccolo. However, it didn't.

"The Gohan I know would never leave his loved ones without telling them his plans. They're worried sick," Piccolo looked at him disapprovingly.

"It's not the first time I went off the radar, and I left my Ki up so you guys knew where I was and that I was training."

"But not everyone can sense Ki, Gohan, and you know that. Why have you left them in the dark?"

Gohan's face expressed guilt, but he didn't answer Piccolo's question. If he'd told his mother what his plans were, she wouldn't have allowed it. School was the number one priority, staying alive second. Plus, she'd probably be even more concerned if she'd known about his troubles with Vegeta. So while his decision may have hurt his mother, he felt like he was doing the right thing.

"What is bothering you? Maybe I can clear your mind," Piccolo's usually growling voice grew soft and caring.

Gohan sighed, "If you promise not to make a fuss, I'll tell you what's on my mind."

"Who is here making a fuss about something," Piccolo smirked, "You know me better than that, I'm here to help you, and I'll always respect your decisions."

"Before I do, may I ask you a question?" Gohan asked and Piccolo nodded in agreement, "What is the real reason you guys have helped me so intensely to get me back on my feet after I was poisoned?"

"First of all, because we deeply care about you, second, we owe you. You once saved all of our lives, now it was time to return that favor."

"And third?" Gohan asked suspiciously.

"There is no third," Piccolo took in the boy, "Why do you ask?''

"Vegeta mentioned that the reason you guys were helping me was because you were afraid he'd turn his back on us all, threatening the world if he did, and that I was your solution if that happened," Gohan looked dejected.

"Nonsense" Piccolo's eyes grew were puzzled, "I don't know what Vegeta's motives are for telling you that, but that's not tr-"

"He even threatened to kill me and to harm my friend," Gohan intervened a little too loud, much to the annoyance of the Namekian, "And I'll make sure that never happens!"

"Like I said - before you interrupted me - I don't know what Vegeta's motives are for telling you that, but that's not true. The guy is rough around the edges, so he may have said those things, but I'm sure that it served a greater purpose. If he really wanted to kill you or harm your friend, you'd both already be dead. Vegeta and I have not always seen eye to eye, but to this day I'll trust him with my life."

"Your funeral…" Gohan said irritably.

Piccolo was surprised by his unusual reaction. He was clearly not himself. When he looked closely at the boy, he was startled by how he was doing. His clothes were worn and even torn at some places, and he was covered in self-inflicted wounds from his intensive training sessions. It was also clear that personal hygiene was not his number one priority and in general he looked tired, giving him a very old expression. It was not wise to leave the kid alone anymore, he clearly needed some guidance. With a deep sigh, Piccolo crossed his legs. "You've reached a point that you can't improve on your own, and since your body is overspent right now, it's best to train your mind. Let me help you with the rest of your journey to becoming a stronger man." Gohan nodded in agreement, his sensei's support felt like a slice of heaven in these hellish times.

After finding the right posture, they both fell into a deep meditation, or at least Gohan tried, but couldn't concentrate. He constantly was checking Vegeta's Ki to make sure he was still at Capsule Corp., as well as Videl's, to make sure she wasn't in trouble either. According to the peaks in her Ki, the latter probably was on a police job. After a while, Piccolo spoke in Gohan's mind using telepathy, "Your mind is clouded, you must empty it if you want to continue."

"I can't," Gohan replied in his mind, feeling Videl's Ki flare up again. Is she fighting someone with a pretty high Power Level?

"If you don't let go of your unfounded concerns for her, you won't achieve your goal of becoming that person who can protect her when danger really strikes."

"How did you…?" Gohan was stunned. How did Piccolo know what was on his mind? He didn't tell him, and when telepathy was used to share conversations and images, it wasn't a mind-reading technique.

"You don't have to be a genius to figure that one out, Kid, I know you through and through," Piccolo's growling voice answered as a grin spread across his face. "You're always fighting for those you love, you wouldn't come this far if it were just to protect yourself. And that same reason is now preventing you from achieving that same goal." Piccolo opened his eyes again to look at his pupil, "She is strong enough to handle that foe herself, you have to let it go and focus."

Her Ki flared up again, it sure was an intense fight. "I can't," Gohan got up and scowled his eyes, realizing that Yamcha had returned to West City since the baseball game and wouldn't help his friend. "She may be strong, but not bulletproof, and criminals tend to always carry guns. What if something happens and she dies? Then all this is for nothing!" Without saying goodbye, he blasted off northeast, leaving a bewildered Piccolo behind. To increase his speed, he turned Super Saiyan and flew faster than he had ever flown before. His training really paid off, he thought to himself, as Satan City appeared in the distance. To save some much-needed energy, he returned to his base-form and flew to the crime scene, landing on one of the roofs of the larger building, as he usually did when Videl took on criminals.

He observed the scene and was surprised to see that it was the Red Shank Gang, a group of feared criminals in Satan City. These weren't your average criminals, they were usually very organized and not afraid of causing collateral damage. And given the amount of bodies scattered across the scene, this was the case again. Then he noticed Videl, who was being held in a sleeper hold by their leader, a mountain of a man who called himself the most powerful thug in Satan City.

Gohan wanted to jump off the building to help her, but was held by a powerful hand. "Gohan, think, they'll recognize you when you go out there!" Piccolo said while clutching Gohan's Gi's back.

"I don't have my watch on me and frankly I don't care, she needs my help!"

"Does she?"

Confused, Gohan looked down again and saw that Videl had broken free of the thug's grip with an elbow in the abdomen, knocking the man out with one powerful kick. 'Wow', he thought to himself, being impressed to say the least.

"You have lost yourself in worry and let it overshadow your grip on reality. The girl is strong, she can take care of herself within the city boundaries. Have faith in her as she has faith in you."

"What do you mean?" Gohan turned to the Namekian in confusion.

"Ever since you left Satan City, the girl wishes you good fortune every night and prays personally to Dende to guide you to succeed your goal, even though she has no clue what that goal is." Piccolo let go of Gohan's Gi and came to stand beside him, placing his hand on his shoulder. "The same principle applies for Vegeta and his threats, they overshadow your judgment. But I understand you feel the need to reassure yourself that the latter scenario isn't true, so come, let's go back and prepare properly for your fight to come."

Gohan pondered his sensei's words. Indeed, he may have overreacted: the Power Level of that thug who had fought Videl was respectfully high for a human, but Videl far outclassed him. She really was an amazing person, wasn't she? But on the other hand, he didn't believe that Piccolo was right about Vegeta, and he understood that if he wanted to take him down, he needed to be able to concentrate on his training instead of worrying about her.

Gohan nodded and looked down for the last time and was surprised to met her eyes. Apparently she had seen him standing on the building and her expression was full of confusion. "You're right, we'd better go," he said reluctantly, averted his gaze after he said goodbye to her inwardly, and walked to the other side of the building so she couldn't see him fly away.

For over a week, Gohan resumed his training with Piccolo, improving himself in strength, skill and inner peace, to the point that the Namakian could no longer help him. He had managed to allay his unreasonable worries and with many meditation sessions he had managed to reflect on what he wanted in life, and finally found that answer. But before he could allow such thoughts, he had to overcome the last obstacle that could take that life away from him: Vegeta.

"You've come a long way kid, I'm proud of you," Piccolo said with a satisfying grin on his face as he saw what his apprentice had become. "There's not much I can teach you anymore."

"I feel so much more confident, I almost forgot what it felt like," Gohan said honestly. It felt so different, as if a long-lost part of him had come back to life, almost as if he had been reborn.

"You should take this day off and rest, that's what your father would normally do before a big fight. Take your time to clean yourself, body and mind, and enjoy a good night's sleep. Tomorrow you'll need all the strength you can get." Piccolo then looked down at Gohan's ruined Gi, "Should I fix that for you?"

Gohan looked down and smirked, "Maybe that's a good idea, but can you give me my fathers Gi? It would piss off Vegeta."

Piccolo grinned, "I'll make sure to look closely from the lookout to see his expression when you appear in it." He then reached out his hand and let out a cry as a dazzling flash cloaked the proud demi-Saiyan. As the lights faded, Gohan looked at his new attire, which was an orange Gi with a blue sash-style obi, with matching undershirt, shoes and wristbands.

Gohan grinned, "You couldn't help it, huh?" pointing to the kanji symbol '魔' on his chest. "Well, I guess this is goodbye for now," he said, looking at his sensei as he held out his arm.

Piccolo grasped his forearm firmly, "'For now', well spoken, see you after the battle." He then looked Gohan straight in the eye, "Let all your frustration from the past few weeks out, but when you do, do it with awareness so you won't regret the aftermath." With this advice, he let go of his pupil's forearm, nodded one last time to wish him luck, and flew away.

The next morning, Gohan got up early, put on his new Gi, and washed his face in a nearby creek. When he looked at his reflection, he was almost convinced he was looking at his dad if he didn't know any better. He stood tall in pride: he had come a long way and finally he was ready. And with that in mind, he left off for Capsule Corp.

As he neared his destination, he saw a figure standing in the tiled garden with arms crossed, clearly waiting for his arrival. Gohan stopped within earshot with his head held high, but he didn't land. Instead, he raised his Ki to give a clear signal of his intentions.

Vegeta looked at the man who he once called a boy and smirked.

"So the day of reckoning has finally come."

Will the Prince of all Saiyans live up to his threats? Is our hero's training enough to withstand the full-blooded Saiyan? Will one of them drown in power and lose grip on reality? Find out in the next chapter of
"When a Hero Disappears": Clash of Titans!

Hi there!

I really tried my best to finish this story before the 15th of May, as my very busy working season (with night shifts and all) will start, but I'm not going to achieve that. This means that I have very limited time to write, and you guys have to wait longer for chapters to appear. So if there is some radio silence, think of me working very hard, having no sleep what so ever. But as I said before, I hate unfinished stories, so there is no need to panic. We have at least 4 chapters to go.

Lots of love, yours truly