Last time on not a Shadow of who I want to be Shadow, the ruler of the world, fell in love with Eggman 2, the successor of Eggman, who prompted him to give up morality to fight for only themselves. Upon learning all his friends died as the consequence of his actions Shadow became devastated and filed for divorce with Eggman 2. Just when things couldn't get any worse Eggman 2 takes the kid, the kid.
"Daddy what are you doing" asked Shadow Jr to which Eggman 2 responded "I'm having a mental breakdown, son. Shadow The Hedgehog broke up with me. I don't know what to do with my life anymore". "I KNOW. I will threaten to blow up the Earth, come, lets go to the ark" he said. "Wait, Don't you need the seven Chaos Emeralds" asked Shadow Jr. Then they went to gather the Chaos Emeralds.
"I couldn't have done it without you" said Eggman 2 then gave Shadow Jr a cookie as a reward. They had all the seven Chaos Emeralds now.
Dr Eggman 2 whispered "HAHAHAHAHAHA" loudly in Shadow Jr's ear as he approached the computer room of the space colony ark. He started the computers and shoved the Chaos Emeralds into them. The lights were beaming red. "To unlock the computer please solve the following partial differential equation" it said. "OH NO, Partial differential equations, my weakness" cried Eggman 2. "You should have paid more attention in school, Eggman" grinned Shadow Jr looking like the coolest nerd in the world as he solved the partial differential equation. "I now have full control of the space colony ark" chuckled Shadow Jr. "Give it to me. Or... I will punch you" said Eggman 2. "Do not punch me" cried Shadow Jr and handed the control to Eggman 2.
Shadow breathed heavily and the air apologized it didn't give him enough oxygen. He went into the living room of his castle, poured a glass of milk and as he squeezed the glass of milk down his throat his throat became colder from the milk. This reminded him about how when he used to eat icecream the icecream would cool his lips. Shadow moved rapidly to the computer and bought a gallon of icecream. Someone knocked on the door and Shadow was surprised the icecream man was here so fast. They must have hired someone fast. Espio walked in and gave Shadow 2 gallons of icecream, an extra one to be nice. Espio told Shadow about what Eggman 2 was doing and Shadow emotioned with anger.
Shadow went outside to see Dr Eggman 2 broadcasting on the bilboards. "Howdy earthlings. I am Dr Eggman 2. The greatest scientist pioneer. But let's not get too focused on my ego." he said then walked out of frame. "Where's my notes whispered Eggman 2". "Here" sighed Shadow Jr. Shadow was confustrated (confused+frustrated), why was Shadow Jr helping him.
"Albert Einstein once said "Shadow is bad". What did EinStein mean by this? Well lets see what the children have to say." said Eggman 2 then Shadow Jr entered frame. "I think Einstein meant Shadow is mean and a bad leader. Someone like Dr Eggman 2 is way cooler" said Shadow Jr. "Aww, how could you not see that cute children and have your heart melt" said Dr Eggman 2. "In fact, the Shadownian empire have left you earthlings at a crossroads. End Shadow's rule, or die. If you do not comply in 24 hours I will blow up the other piece of moon damaging the ecoscape of the oceans or something. Now bye. I hope you have a good rest of your day contemplating your choices" he said. "I don't want to see your disgusting face here ever again. Go play or something. I'll call you if I need you" said Eggman 2 to Shadow Jr.
Shadow jumped to the ark and he saw Shadow Jr there and they reunited as father and son. "father". "son". "Why are you helping him" asked Shadow. "He used me. l had no choice" said Shadow Jr. "Ah" said Shadow then thought for 23 seconds. "I have a gift for you, son" said Shadow. "Woah! Wooo! Whoppa whoppa!" said Shadow Jr at a 2000 bps heart beat. Shadow took out a bag and took out stuff. "OH MY GOD, A DREAMCAST, THE BEST CONSOLE EVER MADE" screamed Shadow Jr. "AND A COPY OF SHADOWTHE HEDGEHOG" he continued. "NOOOO MY GOD ITS A SHADOW THE HEDGEHOG DREAMCAST PORT TJE BEST GAME OF ALL TIME ON TJE BEST CONSOLE OF ALL TIME" trumpeted Shadow Jr. "And I've got more" smiled Shadow. "A SHADOW THE HEDGEHOG PC PORT?!" yelled Shadow Jr. "I love you, dad" said ShadowJr. "Same" said Shadow.
Dr Eggman 2 had set the ark to automatically fire against the moon unless he pressed something. The computer asked him to solve a partial differential equation so he called Shadow Jr. Shadow Jr did not respond. Little did Dr Eggman 2 know but Shadow Jr was busy playing Shadow The Hedgehog for the dreamcast. Eggman 2 looked around the ark but he could not find him. Eggman 2 began feeling fear. As Yoda once said fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate and hate leads to suffering. Dr Eggman 2 punched the floor in his anger. Gradually he began to hate it. He punched the floor as hard as he could repeatedly and his hand began hurting. This was the suffering yoda talked about he thought.
Eggman 2 calculated the risks of blowing up the moon. What Eggman 2 found shocked him. The trigonometry suggested after the explosion a piece of the shattered moon would hit the space colony ark at an angle causing it to fly towards the Earth. This would kill all life on Earth but most importantly him. He had to solve the partial differential equation, and fast, but he could not find Shadow Jr. He tried random answers. "Maybe the answer is 5". It was wrong. "Maybe it's 7". It was wrong. "Maybe it's 3". It was wrong. Red text appeared on screen. "You answered wrong 3 times. Next attempt in 15 hours" it said.
After 1 hour of searching Eggman 2 found Shadow and Shadow Jr and he explained the situation. "Can't I go into superform and prevent this from happening" asked Shadow. "No. The machine consumed the Chaos Emeralds" said Eggman 2. He tried to come up with a great analogy for this. "Basically the machine is like your mom. Yo moma so fat she consumed the Chaos Emeralds" he laughed. Shadow cringed then asked "How much time do we have left, can't we stop this". Eggman 2 looked at his clock. "We have about 3 minutes"
The death star beam copycat fired producing light while it fired towards the moon. Shadow looked out the window seeing an explosion on the moon but even if he didn't see it he would still know it happened because he could hear it. Shadow wasn't deaf. He saw it splitting into multiple pieces. One piece stood out in particular. It was getting closer. The ship vibrated biggly as it hit. "NOOOOO" screamed Eggman 2. "I I never got to capture Ash's Pikachu" snapped Eggman 2. "What?" sighed Shadow. "I am-m the leader of team rocket! sjaskaia" he slurred. Eggman 2 was shaking. There was so much he hadn't done in life. He had a panic attack. "Fuck you Eggman 2 no one likes you" said ShadowJr. Eggman 2 had a mental breakdown which spiraled into a schizophrenia attack. Shadow shoved his cock into Eggman 2's asshole with such force Eggman 2 flew miles away never to be seen again. Shadow and Shadow Jr were alone.
"This is all my fault" said Shadow Jr. "Huh" responded Shadow. "I helped Eggman 2 get here. Without me he wouldn't have gotten this power. The power to destroy the world" said Shadow Jr. "Don't think about it that way. You could have done so much good for the world" said Shadow. "Before me the world was fine. Now it's gone" said Shadow Jr.
"I am Shadow The Hedgehog Junior. Sexual intercourse... gone deadly wrong! I've caused so much destruction... I should have been aborted! This is WHO I AM." he said.
"I don't know about that" said Shadow. "But I do know one thing. I love you, son". Shadow and Shadow Jr hugged for the last moment in their lives.
