It's still early, first light not even breaking yet, just a soft blue tinge to the curtains.
Buffy stirs awake.
She feels like she hasn't had a decent sleep since Willow brought her back. So many nightmares about…coffins. Clawing through dirt. Bloody hands. Soil in her mouth.
She's waking up for the first time feeling something she hasn't felt in months. Contentment.
She casts a glance up at Spike. His face portrays no smirk. No scowl. It's oddly peaceful.
I've never seen him peaceful before… I… I've never been peaceful like this before…
This moment is so new she barely takes a breath, not wanting to disturb it. Like a key opening in a lock she sees it all from his eyes.
She remembers the scowls. The smirks. The way his tongue would curl round his teeth when he mocked her or said something crude. How he'd get right up into her face, the attitude pouring off him like a fog.
The bravado, the arrogance, the punches landed, the insults hurled. All of it desperately trying to shelter his own vulnerability. His agonising loneliness.
Just like I was…
A few strands of hair have detached themselves from his gelled back helmet and are starting to find their natural curl. She unwinds an arm from his chest and brushes her fingers through it. A lock of hair wraps round her finger like a small white claw.
He stirs for a moment, pulling his arm out from underneath his head. He finds her hand, pulling it down out of his locks. Squeezes it gently. She watches. He doesn't open his eyes but he starts moving her hand down to his neck, fitting her fingers over the bite mark she left. Running his hand back down her arm. She runs her hand over the welts and he shivers deeply.
Spikes eyes flutter open then, sees her staring at him. He sighs comfortably.
"Morning," he's peering through half closed lids.
"Hi."
He pulls her in closer, nuzzling her neck, purring in her ear.
"Did you sleep well, luv?"
"Better than I have in a years."
"You were out like a light." He's kissing her neck gently.
She gasps as his lips brush over her skin so lightly it makes the hair on her neck raise up.
"I didn't know you could be so soft."
"Oi!" he pulls back from her neck, snapping his teeth at her, "less of the soft."
She purrs. Runs her hands across his back, "soooo soft."
"Stop it," He glares at her, clenching his jaw, "you're on thin ice, missy." She smiles. His threats always made her wild, but from this, the other side, it's so…
…enticing. It's a game.
It's…always been a game…
She pushes her hand deep into his hair. His back arches like cat, and something like a soft growl rumbles from his throat.
"You're just the Big…" she runs her lips over across his jaw line, grinning her own grin, "….Soft."
"That's. It." Before she can even blink he's wrapped his arms around her torso. His knees slide up under her and he rams her back into the headboard. If she had been anyone else she'd be wearing bruises on her back for a month, maybe even a cracked rib. Something dislodges from the bedside table and clatters to the floor.
Yes…Harder!...
He kisses her hard, sucking her lip deep into his mouth and biting down. Blunt teeth nearly tearing her flesh.
"If you want to be slammed through another building, pet, all you have to do is ask."
HARDER!
She pulls back out of the kiss. The hand still in his hair grips a tangle of locks. She feels the hair gel splinter in her fingers, and she pulls his head back. Hard.
The muscles in his neck look like ropes. His adams apple bobs as his gasps.
"Always knew you were a hair puller," he smirks, his tongue curling out of his mouth with a teasing flick. She winds her legs around his hips, anchoring herself against his chest. He squeezes her closer with his arms around her waist. His skin is so white. All except the teeth marks and bruises she left last night which, though fading, are still a deep pink.
Without easing the pull on his hair Buffy slowly runs her tongue over the bite mark. He lets out a low deep groan.
The muscles in her thighs grip him harder.
If I'd done this with Riley I would've broken his hip.
Another voice in her says he can take it. He wants it.
Buffy runs her tongue back over the welts, counting with a little bit of pressure each dip where her teeth had sunk in. Slowly…. Agonisingly…. Torturously.
Spike bucks underneath her. He's starting to pant like he's run a marathon. Buffy pulls her tongue away from his skin and caresses his neck with her teeth. His whole body shivers underneath her, she can feel his head straining against the hair she hasn't let go of.
She sets her teeth against the welts and bites down. Not hard enough to break the skin but she can feel his trembling with the effort of suppressing a scream.
"God…" he chokes out.
She releases his hair from her grip and he smashes his lips against hers. His arms loosen around her just for a moment and she pushes him back down on to the bed.
He tries to wrap his arms round her but she's quick and she has his wrists in her hands, pinning him back down, her hips straddling his stomach.
She pushes his hands up and forces his fingers to curl round the iron bars of the bedframe.
Spike keeps holding on to them as she takes her hands away, watching her as she runs her hands down over his arms. His chest. She traces a line with her tongue from his bite down to his nipple. When she catches it between her teeth an electric shock goes through his spine. The heat of her mouth feels like it's burning his skin.
Fuck me, she's going to set me on fire…
His head swims as she adds a bit more pressure, her hand is brushing the skin on his thighs. Achingly close to his cock. He's so hard it feels almost painful.
She releases his nipple from her teeth and he has to choke down a whimper. Her tongue is on his stomach, kissing and licking and brushing her lips over his skin. Her hair cascades over him. It feels like silk. Everything she does feels like silk, slipping down him. The slowness of it all is making the demon inside him throw itself against the bars of his mind. It's taking so much to keep his fangs in place, push it back down.
She's nestled between his legs, long golden hair spread out and over him.
In a moment that feels like it stretches into hours she licks one long continuous line from his groin across the join where his pelvis meet is thigh. Every nerve stands to attention.
She does it again on his other side. The monster inside him howls. Every muscle feels like it's going to snap. He grips the bars of the bed tighter, feeling like he'll snap his own fingers in half.
She's licking his thighs, soft hands running over his skin.
I'm going to burst… God, I'm going to die… can you have a heart attack without a pulse?…Even in my wildest dreams Buffy it wasn't like this. Never thought you could be so generous-
Her tongue momentarily grazes his cock and everything in his mind goes white. He can feel her watching him, feel her breathing on him, hot air flowing over him like water.
She's done playing now. Her hands wrap around his cock and for a dreaded moment Spike thinks he's going to faint from the sudden pressure. Her tongue flicks over his tip, little licks of searing heat. Once… twice…
Then suddenly he's in her. He can't help himself, he screams from it. She's pulling everything down with her mouth, her tongue lapping and curling around him. The sucking pressure, the building momentum. It's nearly painful. Excruciating.
A tidal wave is rising in him. The force of it frightens him.
When that breaks they'll be nothing left of me. No one could survive this…
The wave peaks. Oh my God-
"Buffy- stop I-"
But it's too late. It crashes over him, and through him. He's screaming but he can't hear it. There's nothing left but the heat from her mouth and the feel of her hair on his stomach. Everything else is white and far away. She's swallowing him whole. He can feel his whole body being slowly buried by her mouth, slipping down her throat. So dark. So warm. Heat the colour of dark purple, the colour of bruises. He can feel it rising around him, like a coiling snake. When it finally passes he's left shivering underneath her, spasms shaking him violently.
When the shaking finally stops she moves her mouth away.
Spike realises that his demon has moved further back into his mind. He feels it settling down, closing its heavy eyes. Whatever it is, it's purring.
Peace… this is what being at peace is like…I've missed that.
He doesn't realise she's moved until she's pulling him in, wrapping her arms around him. She cradles him against her neck.
He wraps a hand into her hair, feeling the gold satin slipping around his fingers. With her free hand she pulls the blanket over him. The tenderness prickles his throat, and he bites back tears. Pushes his face in to her neck. Her fingers are gently rubbing his back and he falls asleep to touch of her skin on his.