The sound of Dawn's alarm through the walls drags Spike into consciousness. Buffy is still deeply asleep, each breath from her sounding like a sigh.
He has a few minutes still. Dawn never gets up at the first alarm. He untangles himself from Buffy slowly. She stirs for a moment before resettling under the blanket.
He shuffles into his t-shirt and jeans as quietly as he can, closing the bedroom door behind him with barely a whisper.
In the bathroom he runs the water in the shower until it's nearly scolding before getting in. Haven't had hot water since babysitting Dawn… He leans his head against the wall of the shower and lets the boiling water pour down his back. It bites at the bruises and cuts on his skin on the way down.
The heat does nothing to change his deathly pallor but he feels the grime from the last few days washing off. There's a momentary pang of longing as the smell of Buffy drains away with it.
He claws his fingers across his scalp, pulling out the remaining clumps of rubble and hair gel.
When the last bit of grit is finally out of his hair he shuts the water off. He pulls a towel off the wrack and dries off before slipping back into his clothes. Without gel his hair starts drying up into his natural tight white curls. Can't do anything about that for now. Just have to look bleeding angelic.
He hears Dawn's second alarm go off. Out in the hallway he gives her door a hard couple of bangs with his fist.
"Up, Bit!"
There's a mumble behind the door and a shuffle. He waits a beat before giving the door another bang. She opens it, wiping sleep out of her eyes.
"I'm up! Sheesh."
"Breakfast time." He nods towards the stairs. She pauses rubbing her eyes.
"You're making?"
"No."
"Please?"
"No."
"Pleeeease?"
"Stop whining!"
"Can I have an omelette?"
"Fine, but I'm putting spinach in it."
"I don't want spinach!"
"Tough luck, you're not eating properly, I can smell you starting to turn anaemic."
"That's disgusting." She grimaces as they start down the stairs.
"You're telling me, no vamp is gonna bite you with blood the equivalent to a Coors Light."
"Ha, Blood Light."
"Diet Blood."
"Yuck."
He smokes as she eats, having first smothered the omelette in ketchup.
"That's revolting," he winces as she shovels the last scrap of egg and ketchup into her mouth.
"You put blood on your wheatabix, you're hardly one to judge."
Blood. The demon in him wakes up from where it had been quietly sleeping in the back of his head. His stomach tightens into a knot. Shit. Haven't drunk in a while.
Inside his head the monster starts prowling back and forth. Feed. Feed. Feedfeedfeedfeedfeedfeed-
"I uh…I stopped off on the way home yesterday and got some. For you. Obviously."
He blinks, trying desperately to focus on her words over the growling in his head.
"You bought wheatabix?"
"No. Blood. I put it in the fridge. The butcher gave me the stink eye like I was going to go all Carrie with it." She gets his mug out of the cupboard and sets it down next to the microwave, "it's on the top shelf. I think if I look at it right now though I'll lose the omelette. Y'know… all the ketchup…" She heads out of the kitchen, her feet have barely started on the stairs before he's at the fridge.
There are 3 bags lined up on the top shelf pushed to the back behind a bag of salad.
Thank you. Thank youthankyouthankyoufeed. Feedfeedfeedfeed. Feedfeedfeedfeedfeed-
He tears into the bag with his teeth, the beast crawling out and round his face, pulling William back, pushing its own fangs down and out and over his mouth. The bag feels like it'll burst in his hand. He doesn't even use the mug, just sucks it straight from the plastic. After the second bag he finally catches his breath. The beast settles back again, blood dripping from it's mouth, it's tongue licking around it's lips and teeth finding the last scraps. It lets Spike push the fangs back, William settling back in to place.
Spike sighs as he drops the empty plastic bags into the bin.
"Oh- uh..hey." He turns and Willow is standing in the doorway to the kitchen, wearing yellow pajamas.
Spike casts an eye over her. She's lost weight, there's deep purple marks under her eyes. From here he can smell she's been crying. It reeks, like stale salt water and sweat.
"I was just getting some water," she gets a glass from the cupboard and fills it. Her hands are shaking as she holds it under the tap.
"You look like you've had a rough one." He fishes another cigarette out of the pack on the table.
"Yeah. Went out with Amy last night."
"The ex-rat?"
"Yeah."
She looks so weak. She's filling a hole with whatever she can. Burning the candle at both ends, he thinks.
Eat her. William pulls the leash tighter, pushing the demon further back. He takes a drag on his cigarette.
"You outta take it easy Red. You're looking a little… frayed. Some big nasty could come and blow you over with one puff." She stiffens, pouring the last of the water down the sink.
"I'm fine."
"Uh huh."
Dawn comes back in the room swinging her school bag up onto the kitchen table. Willow brightens, relief at a third person palpable.
"Morning Dawnie."
"Morning."
"Got everything for school?"
"Yuh-huh."
"You had breakfast?" She starts pulling out a bowl from the cupboard.
"I already ate, Spike made an omelette."
He's watching her closely enough to see a flicker of anger cross her face.
"Oh…good."
Dawn misses the hurt expression, she's already fixed her gaze back on Spike.
"Are you still going to be here tonight?"
He opens his mouth but before he can say anything Willow is jumping back in again.
"Actually Dawnie, I- I thought we could maybe catch a movie? You and me? Make up for last night? I'll even buy you a burger what do you say?"
"Oh uh," Dawn blinks, "yeah. Sure that'd be cool." There's a honk from a car outside, "that's Xander. Gotta dash." She grabs her bag and is out of the kitchen.
Willow avoids his gaze as she slinks out of the room and back up the stairs.
Spike dumps his cigarette in the empty glass she left behind. He waits until Willow's door closes again before heading up the stairs.