Chapter 6. Blue Flame.

I dance to the music thrumming through my ears. Dancing along to the fast paced song that I always played about a guy and his girlfriend going through a bunch of bad things and just smiling through it all and having a good time together.

Momo and I had a moment together last night. And after the tense exam a few days ago I felt better than ever. The only issue is the fact of if I can keep it going. If I could be the perfect son that has an attitude issue and all kinds of issues. My flames signify how I truly feel about my dad. Each time I unleash them I feel a sort of release. Just the thought of being a hero under his shadow just makes me sick. Today I decided that maybe I could talk to him.

I get out of my room and hear the treadmill going. Dad's home and it feels weird. He seems in a better mood and Fuyumi acts like he hit his head. Which I agree with. Was he trying to give me a break or something? I knock on the door but I don't hear him say come in. He just continued running on the treadmill. My knock being forgotten. I go in and see him running. His muscles are a well-oiled machine. He slows it down and starts walking instead.

"Shoto." He says. "I know you're there. Do you need something?"

"Uh!" I start. "Uhm… No… I was just ah… well. The exam was good."

"I see." He says "Did you excel?"

"Well I think I did. I mean I DID ram into a wall after using your Jet Burn technique."

He stops the treadmill. "You were paying attention?" he breathes. I could just feel the shock in his voice.

"Yeah! I mean… yes! Also I think I aced the interview! So…"

He turns and the grin on his face makes me think of someone who won the lottery. It scares me even more than when he wants to take me out during training. He almost looks normal.

"You learned how to use my techniques!" He exclaims. "Amazing! Despite your attitude issues you can be the one to surpass me!" His normal rant turns from disappointment to actual pride in me.

That's the moment when I realize that my dad feeling proud of me is a weird feeling. A familiar one yes but just weird when just a few days ago he was whacking me with a shihai and throwing gouts of fire at me. He stays distant from me knowing that I might not like him hugging me. Which I totally don't considering he suplexed me once. I always thought that was weird. I stare off into space and Dad rambles on. His eyes glittering with pride and his grin wide and sharp like a knife.

Then I hear him snap his fingers. "Shoto. Earth to Shoto." He says. I blink back into reality and Dad just turns back to get into the groove of exercising.

"In light of your apparent success there will be no training, unless you want to," he orders. I'm already halfway out the door and I flash him a thumbs up.

Once I'm out of the house I can just get on with my day. Well, instead of waiting, I might just check if I got an acceptance letter from UA or one solidly rejecting me. I get to the mailbox and find Fuyumi standing in a deep snowdrift. Her hands nervously combing through the mail. Eyes full of fear. She's muttering.

"Where is it? Where is it?" she flicks through the mail like a madwoman. "Dad's gonna KILL me!" She moves about like a hummingbird. Whizzing from side to side. Checking more and more.

"Hey." I say as she jumps, mail scattering like bird feathers.

"Whaaa!" She yelps, "Oh jeez, Shoto!"

I chuckle a little, "What, are ya looking for a love letter?" She shakes her head.

"I think I lost your acceptance letter to UA…" she says, "So that's why I'm freaking out!"

"Oh. Well I'm sure it'll turn up! So if you need help I can help out!" I get on my hands and knees, "Hmmm…" digging through the snow and trying to find it. That's when I realized Dad may have found out the verdict. If I didn't get in he would have me drawn and quartered.

"Don't worry about it sis!" I exclaim. "Dad must've found out about it!" She gawks.

"WHAT! Noooo! Shotoooo!" She screams. "It's for Mom!"

I scramble through the snow. "Okaaaay! Gonna find it! Here!" I thrust a slightly soaked envelope into the air. "Let's go! If we hurry then visiting hours should be there by the time we arrive! You got your card right?"

Fuyumi pulls out her subway card. I dash off without any words. Yelling, "I'M COMING MOM!" I'm not letting this go. I'm not letting this stop me! I'm gonna do this! I'm gonna see my mom! Fuyumi suddenly grabs my arm.

"Shoto. Let me go on my own." She sternly says.

"What?" I ask. "But… don't you wanna see Mom together?"

"Shoto. I mean this in the nicest way possible but… but Mom might not want to see you right now."

"Wha… but I… I forgive her about the whole burning me thing! It was all Dad's big dumb stupid fault!" I feel tears sting my eyes. "I promised myself that anytime I get the chance to see her I'd take it!"

The odd familiar feeling stokes in my chest. "Besides… the last time someone was in an institution like that… I didn't know until someone really important told me. I think."

Fuyumi gently pulls me into a hug. "Finding the letter was enough." She says. "I'll tell her you said hi."

"That's not enough!" I snap. "I… I…" I stutter a little with more tears in my eyes, "I just wanna see her! Even if it's for a few minutes! You see her all the time with Natsuo!"

Thinking back on it… I did have a few good memories of Mom before the Big Blank. One time she had a big bandage on her face. Right over the same eye. I was too little to help her but if I had my quirk back then I would ice it.

Or the time she and I watched TV together. We always did. Based on what I barely remember now that I've seen pictures. Fuyumi hesitates but still stays firm.

"Look. You have UA to focus on now. Just… just go back home and I'll tell you how it goes."

"Fuyumi…" I sigh. "What are you so scared of?"

"Scared?" Fuyumi echoes, "I'm not scared. It's just…"

"You wanna fix things. You always try to but every time Dad blows you off, you cry. Guys like him… they fake being better all the time." I say. Tears sliding down my face. "Believe me. I've tried. I tried to see if I could get through to him."

Fuyumi looks down at herself. "You don't have to put up with him. Neither of us do! You know what Fuyumi?" I segue.

"What?" she asks.

I smile, "The thing is… I smile because I don't wanna show it hurts me too bad." I feel my cheeks heat up, "Also… uhh… I always think of you and Natsuo when I use my quirk. So me being a hero is more about being better than Dad and basically making things better for you guys and Mom too."

I hug her. "I'll stay back this time. But next time I'm coming with ya!"

"Alright. I guess we can make it a thing." she says. "What are you going to do?"

"I guess I'll go for a walk." I sigh. "Better than staying cooped up inside." She leaves for the station and I get on my shoes to go out for a walk. Walking outside and just enjoying the day is one of my favorite ways to relax.

I go for a jog. Mostly to clear my head and try to get my thoughts in order. My idea of trying to get my thoughts in order is constantly training. Almost like an instinctual drive. Just jogging down the street with a hood on so no one could see who I was. I still wore it just in case because who knows is out there. Could be that weird Hamlet guy. Could be Momo. Could even be my hero obsessed friend. Just running along the sidewalks is good enough for me.

I smile as I come to a stop. My journey taking me to a normal enough park not that far from home. I settle down on a bench and get out my journal detailing exactly what I did. I write down everything. Clothing. Schedules. All kinds of things. Just so I don't ever forget this. None of this will. That way if I ever forget I have my experiences here to jog my memory. Just a memory book. What Quirks are. What they do. My new fam-

Oh. I… I forgot the old one. I remember only that I had a very similar dad to Dad. And a very similar sister to Fuyumi. Mom was similar I think. But… but I guess my avoidance was normal back in my old life because it feels familiar. Letting my friends not get too close. Avoiding things that make me feel happy or fulfilled because I'm scared of something taking it away. That's why I train so much. So if that happens… I can fight whoever wants to take it tooth and nail.

I sigh and stop writing. Looking up at the trees with sunlight rippling through. I don't know why I'm here. All I really know is that I woke up one day ten or so years ago in this new body. The rest is slowly unfogging itself from my mind. It's almost like it's revealing itself. I take a heavy breath and take out the hair dye in my bag. Something about red hair makes me viscerally angry. Just seeing it makes me want to hurl. So I got some white hair dye. I hope Dad doesn't take this the wrong way.

Not long after I take it out I feel something shadow me. Then the same noxious smell enters my nostrils and I snap my gaze up to see Hamlet Guy. He's still wearing the shades and the mask. But at this point I see that his sleeves are charred a little. Underneath aren't exactly what I call arms.

They're burnt. Smelling like burnt flesh. He hops up onto the bench. Squatting and looking down at me.

"Hey." he says. "Whatcha got there?"

I hide it against my chest. "Nothing. Just some hair dye." I flatly deny.

"Hair dye." He echoes. "And… a journal." He plucks it from my arms.

"Hey! Give it!" I snap.

"Whoa whoa whoa!" He says lifting it high above his head. "Gotta get it from me first!"

"Rrgh!" I grunt as I try to reach after him. "Come on…"

I see him read the page a little. His eyes glittering underneath his shades. "Hm. Well. Guess I can add something."

He takes out a finger and swabs it through his hair. Then with the ashes there he dusts it on the page with a tracing. Then without much to say he gives it back. Patting me on the head.

"So you're gonna dye your hair to get back at Endeavor." he says. "Not a bad idea… or… you COULD try what I did! Here!" He grabs my arm. Alarm bells ring in my head and I try to shove him away but then I feel something tear through my sleeve. Bright blue flames eat it and I barely jerk my arm away. His hand still has blue flames burning nice and bright.

"Awww~! Too scared of fire?" he asks. "Come on… it's not bad!" He looms close as I forget the hair dye and toss my journal into my bag as he spreads his arms with flames burning in the palms of his hands.

"You hate him too. I can tell!" He exclaims. "Why else would you have hair dye? Although-"

He takes off his mask and shades. Revealing dead blue eyes ringed by burnt tissue. His mouth was also covered in it. The mask and shades melt and burn away. His face is a grotesque mask of burn tissue and staples.

"I always found surgical staples and burns a better way to rebel," he says. "Today I thought I would pay you a visit! You know… try to… agh what's the word?"

"Incinerate me?" I ask.

"No. Not that one." he answers. I back up and get ready to run because I'm pretty sure this isn't a great place to die. Because my arm hurts like hell.

"Oh! I got it… maybe have you join me!" he hisses. "But judging by the expression on your face and all that I think I blew it."

I turn my back and run. With that he gives chase. "Ooh! Tag!" He doesn't expect ice to shoot out to block his way. I haul ass and I realize I'm way too far from home. I hug my journal to my chest ignoring the searing pain of my arm.

A jet of blue flames screams down from on high exploding like Dad's javelins. I skid and roll with my legs knocked out from under me. Where are the people? Where are the heroes? Seriously I'm being chased by a lunatic with blue flames and there's not a hero to be- Suddenly a white blur bounds in out of nowhere. Suddenly grabbing hold of me and dashing off. I cling to it tightly mostly because I don't wanna fall. A madcap run over roofs and bounding between buildings. Then it stops and skids to a halt. I'm shaking and shuddering.

"Hey. Hey!" A rough but strong voice urges. "Endeavor's Brat!"

A strong set of arms puts me down and I open my eyes. Seeing a pair of red ones staring at me. Long white hair billowing in the breeze. Two rabbit ears swiveling. Arms crossed and standing before me is one of Dad's colleagues. Well… in the loosest terms.

She sighs. "Fuck… can't you not get into trouble?" she huffs in exasperation. "First I heard about you was the whole Dino Gang thing."

I just stare at her as she leans down and glares right into my eyes. "What? Are you deaf? Find me cute or some shit? Maybe a 'Thank You Miss Miruko for saving me from that chargrilling maniac' would make me not wanna kick you."

"Uh… uhm… Thank you, Miss Miruko." I bow my head and shuffle a little. She was right on one thing and one thing only. She is rather… scary actually. Legs able to kick craters into walls and well the ability to do what rabbits can is really scary in practice.

Her gaze softens a little. "You're welcome, Brat." she says. "Just try to get your dad to handle these cases. That fuck always runs away and fighting him is a total drag." Miruko turns and bounds off the roof to the next one. Again and again. I didn't feel starstruck or anything like that. I fell to my knees and let out a breath I was holding.

"Gwaah! Fuck that was scary!" I yell. "Just the flames and the bounding! And the… the… haaah!" I look around and find myself not so far from home. Just feeling as though I needed to get Dad in on this.

Because that guy scares me. I get home and get the first aid stuff out. Disinfecting and cleaning my burn. Binding it with a bandage. It's a normal act. But then I remember that Dad might not be home. I stare at the bandage. Stare at the burn that guy gave me. What he wrote in my book was kanji. A kanji reading as Dabi. Meaning cremation. I glare daggers at that smoky kanji. The burn hurts a little.

All I need to do is to become a hero. Not just that but take down Dabi myself. Dad could throw himself at it all he wants but Dabi threw the gauntlet towards me. So I guess I can duel him. Because if I let him get away the next time I see him, I'm scared that he might hurt Fuyumi or Natsuo. I grit my teeth and shake my head. 'No! Don't even think about that! Just keep training. Keep gaining more and more strength.' I look at the gym door and get up. Going inside.

I'm slugging away at a heavy bag. My fists are both sailing into the surface. Fear driving my training tonight. Scared that Dabi might come back to finish me. If I just joined him or avoided the bookstore that day he would have never gotten to me. But something seems off about him. Something oddly familiar. Dad kept a few things of Touya's in a small box in the shrine. Also why would he say Rebel? Almost like he was going to lash out at his parents or family.

That's when I heard the door slide aside. A slight heat entering the room. Dad stands there freshly extinguished. He seems a little… worried. I turn and stop the bag from swinging. He moves quickly and gently grabs my arm. It was my left so the burn wasn't too bad.

"Shoto, are you hurt anywhere else?" he asks. Taken aback about it I stutter out.

"N-no. I'm fine. Just a little burned."

Dad suddenly yanks me into his arms. Almost crushing me against his chest. His stoicism only cracked a little. I see fear in his eyes and hear it in his voice. It wasn't anger like when I was snatched into the sky… it was fear.

"Did he try to hurt you further?" he asks. A slight crack between Did shows me how much me getting hurt affected him at that moment. Dad lets me go and looks me up and down. Seeing the shreds in my clothes from the javelin.

"How… How did you-"

"You were late getting home from your jog. Fuyumi texted me." he states. "I'm glad you got away. Did you see or hear anything about this Blueflame Killer?" I gesture towards my ashen journal and he cracks it open. Flicking to the right age. Ironically it was my age about what I would say to Mom. He looks at the Kanji.

"Dabi…" he mumbles. "Cremation. Seems like an alias. Did he use any techniques?"

I nod. "Your Flaming Arrow. I think he knows a few."

Dad stiffens at that moment. I don't notice it but he seems to hesitate. He grabs my shoulder and looks down at me with the coldest glare I've ever seen out of him. His stoicism back and his eyes burning into my soul.

"Son. I know you want to go to UA. But considering that this… Dabi character wants to hurt you. I'd feel more comfortable if you didn't go. Stay here."

"Dad. Hang on." I say. My voice quivers a little. "If I stay then that would make your dream pointless. I'd stagnate and lose whatever strength I have. Besides, I'll be surrounded by heroes. If you could just let me-"

He looms over me. "Shoto. Dont argue with me here."

"I will." I say. "I will and you can't stop me! What are you so scared of? What is the big bad Endeavor who neglected his older kids and hit his wife and younger son so scared of?" I rant.

Dad ignites in a huge burst of orange, even burning away the back of his suit. His eyes flashes blue in a sea of flames. I barely have time to skirt away before he has me in his meaty fist. Lifting me by my hoodie front.

"Shoto. Don't make me break you." He growls.

I look him dead in the eyes. "Then do it." I dare. "Do it. You're just a scared old man." He hesitates again. His eyes are full of conflict. He loosens his fist and I drop to the floor like a stone. Dad turns back to the journal. His voice is small.

"Go to your room. Sleep well." He says.

I stand at the door and look back. Seeing Dad so beaten down and tired looking. He's a confusing puzzle of a man. One minute he's ignited and throwing his weight around. And the next he's quiet and brooding. I'm not sure if I can forgive him for what he did.

But I can try to be better than him. Be kind where he's rough. Be personable when he's distant. There's not much I can do to copy him. But UA is the start of something way better. I have to be my own man. My own hero. I could sit in my house and wait until Dad scares the monsters away. Back in my old life I would be happy to do that. But now because I have a quirk. Now because I've been pushed into this corner I want to fight hard just so I can keep my family safe. So I can see my mom and show her that there's nothing to be scared of anymore.

Most of all I just want to fight back. I never got to do it back then. What I remember is crying my eyes out in a way too skinny body riddled with a disability that automatically shut me into the weak category. Always being belittled and thrown down the waterfall until I could climb back up. Now I have a chance to change that scenario. Finally be the man I could only wish to be. The new life I have…

I'll fight for it every second of every day.