Y'all... I'm in total shock right now! You guys have blown me away with the response to this story! As I'm posting this new chapter, we're at 76 follows and 31 favs... I can't begin to thank y'all enough for the interest in my little story! I really do hope y'all are enjoying it, and that you stick with me, especially through this next chapter I'm about to post. So with that said...

The warning starts now! This chapter deals with an attack, and it's not pretty. It's intense, and if you have a trigger for things like this, I've marked it off where you can skip over it. Look for these markers /-/. But it is a huge part of this story. So, kinda going through this with her, let's you feel how she feels going forward.

I will say this now; I've almost been raped, myself. I've been molested when I was a kid. So I know about having choices taken away from you and guys thinking that women are just a play thing for them. So, I'm not trying to be insensitive to anyone else that has been raped. I'm trying to bring awareness to it and the aftermath that comes with it.

So, take it with a grain of sand. It's your choice to read the whole thing, but I'm giving you the option to skip if it's too much for you.

This chapter will probably make y'all cry, so get your tissues out and ready. Actually, keep them handy throughout this story, because there are times where Bella has breakdowns. Going back through and rereading the story, I got teary, myself. May be because I love these characters so much, but oh well. Yes, I'm biased. Lol

Again, thank y'all for all the support and for reading and reviewing! It means the world to me!

Chapter 2 - Drug

BPOV

I thought my life would be amazing once I got to Hollywood. I had an agent, Rosalie. She was great at her job, and she could be a bitch, but she protected those she loved. Over the past few years, she's become my closest ally here, and my best friend. She fought for me when almost all of Hollywood turned against me.

She's gorgeous, too. She looks like a runway model, which kind of always threw me off as to why she was in L.A. and was an agent, and not strutting her stuff on a runway. Full, darker blonde, curly hair, sun-kissed skin, deep blue eyes, killer body, long ass legs. She's the epitome of what should be on a runway.

My bandmates from Eclipse were pretty amazing. Jasper, who happened to be Rose's brother, was our guitar player. He had the whole California surfer boy thing going on. Same blonde hair and blue eyes as Rose, swimmer's body, tan, wicked smile that he uses without hesitation.

Emmett, who was a hulking man with dark brown short hair, and the cutest dimples on his face, was our drummer. He was sweet as he could be, despite the fact that he looked like he could rip your head off. He's dating Rose now, and those two are perfect for each other, without question. His sweet evens out her bitchy.

Angela, who was deceptively a bit of a wild child, looked like the good girl next door. She was our base player and backup singer.

We got along great as a group. We were kind of like siblings.

Once we got together, on a very popular singing show, and started making music, things took off for us.

Then James Hunter came into our dressing room and starts chatting me up and inviting me to that party, or this event that all these singer/songwriters go to, blah blah blah.

James was the typical Hollywood hottie. Slim build, tall, tan, sandy blonde hair that was kinda all over the place, piercing blue eyes.

I thought he was into me. He was very attentive and we hung out a lot. Then I noticed him and a bunch of his buddies popping pills and I kind of shied away from that stuff. I never wanted to be so out of control of my body that I couldn't even function.

Jasper and Emmett tried to shield me from James. They could sense something in James that wasn't good. But, me being 'on top of the world', I didn't listen. He seemed sweet to me. Not the kind of guy that would get completely out of hand.

/-/

But one night, we were at some friend of James' house and his friends were doing God knows what kind of shit. It was dark, and there were sounds of debauchery all over the place. I had wanted to sneak my way out of the house, but James was a little more attentive than he usually was. He kept filling up my cup and I started feeling weird. He got this look in his eyes and told me to come with him and he'd let me lay down.

We walked by several rooms, with their doors open, and multiple people in each room, completely naked and having sex with whoever was available. And people just wandering from room to room to the next person they could fuck.

It gave me an uneasy feeling in the pit of my stomach, but I felt like I couldn't really speak. My arms and legs were becoming heavier but I was acutely aware of everything around me.

James walked me into a room, I don't know where it was in the house, and there was a woman bent over a couch getting fucked.

I tried not to pay too much attention to them, because all I wanted was to lie down.

James lead me to the bed and I stumbled over to it and tried my best to climb on it. I had some trouble since I couldn't get my limbs to work right, so James, being the 'gentleman' he claims to be, took my shoes off and started pulling at my clothes.

I tried to push him away, tried to tell him 'no' and to leave me alone, that I didn't want anything like that. But I don't even know how it came out of my mouth. My head felt heavy and dizzy and completely unfocused.

I felt another pair of hands on me, but I didn't know where they were from, who it was or who else was really in the room with me and James. It was hard to fight off two pairs of hands when I was apparently drugged. But I felt everything that was happening.

I felt my underwear ripped from my body. I felt the hands everywhere on me. I felt the multiple times that several guys took their turn on me. I know James had a couple turns, himself. But there were at least three other guys that I didn't know who they were that came in the room and apparently James told them I was available for the rest of the group.

I was turned this way and that way, on my knees and taken from behind with some guy's dick down my throat. Three guys at the same time, where I never thought I'd ever do anal, but when you have your choices taken away…

I woke up at one point through the night after I'd finally lost consciousness, feeling like a rung out, well used, dish towel. Everything hurt, all over. I groggily looked to the side, and found a couple beside me on the bed, going at it like there was no tomorrow. But I felt something down below, but there was no one over me… then I finally looked down and saw the girl had her hand inside me, fingering me like her life depended on it. But I still had no control over anything and I couldn't stop my body's reaction.

Especially the tears that were falling.

My brain was still so foggy and felt heavy as hell, but I also felt so much fear and anxiety running through me.

Once she saw that I was 'awake', she pulled my body over to where they were and the guy took his turn on my ass while she decided to lick my pussy…

What is wrong with these people?

Later on when I finally had some form of function to my limbs, I crawled off of the bed and tried to find my clothes. I found my top and underwear ripped, but found my jean shorts thrown on the side table. I grabbed those and found a shirt that wasn't torn to shreds, and stumbled out to find my way to a bathroom to get dressed in. But as I walked out into the hallway and down the hall, I felt arms pull me to a hard naked body. I was shoved against the wall, the clothes in my hands knocked to the floor by the hands grabbing mine in theirs and pulled over my head. It was still so dark in the house and I could barely see, but I could tell it was James. He crashed his mouth to mine, in a bruising fashion, and he yanked up my left leg over his arm and slammed himself into me. I tried to push him off, but I was still too weak, and he was way too strong. I tried pulling my mouth away from his, to tell him 'no', but he just held firm. He went to work slamming into me over and over again, never letting up his pace or his mouth on mine. Once he was finished, he let go of me and I slid to the ground, shaking like a leaf, and watched as he walked off into another room and flop onto a bed.

I also saw him pull some girl to him and pull her over his face and he started licking her pussy, her head thrown back in obvious ecstasy.

I grabbed the clothes I'd had, tears streaming down my face, and stumbled down the stairs to find my things, and get the hell out of this house.

/-/

Once I made it to where I could figure out where I was and get a cab, I had them take me to the hospital.

The cab driver looked at me with worry in his eyes, but he didn't say anything during the ride.

Once I was at the hospital, and almost shaking out of my skin, I told them I was raped, and the nurse kind of looked at me like I was an idiot. She obviously recognized me, but for some reason didn't seem to think I deserved to be helped.

She took me to an intake room and told me to sit down and wait for a doctor.

I sat there, curled up in a ball, crying, and waited for over an hour and a half for someone to finally come in.

It wasn't a doctor that came in first. It was a cop.

"Miss, the nurse called and said you thought you'd been attacked? Can you tell me what happened?" He seemed like he didn't want to be there, but I went over everything that I could remember from the night.

Once I was done, he just stared at me.

"Uh, Miss Swan… If you went to this orgy party and regretted it later, then you can't just say that you were raped. All you rock stars and your drugged up parties, you'd think you were used to it by now."

I looked at this cop and my jaw was on the floor.

Was he serious?

"Look, we'll talk to James Hunter, and get his side of the story. See if there were any other people there that can corroborate your story. The doctor should be in here soon, but they looked kind of backed up out there. If you can think of anything else, give me a call." He handed me his card and walked out of the room.

The doctor finally came in and performed a rape kit and took blood to check for drugs. I was shaking so hard because I didn't want anyone touching me anymore. He seemed really inconvenienced because it was taking more time than he thought, but did his job and the nurse said she'd send a rape counsellor in to talk to me.

I lay back in the hospital bed, exhausted and drained, and just cried.

I couldn't believe I let myself… just have the wool pulled over my eyes when it came to James. I thought he actually cared about me. I thought I knew him well enough that I could trust him.

Shows you how wrong I was…

I also just feel so… violated. Because I was. I was violated in EVERY way. By multiple people. And I just couldn't believe this shit was happening to me.

I was always the good girl growing up. I dated one guy in high school, and I thought I was going to marry him… But then I was on a pretty popular talent show when I was in college and I ended up here in Hollywood as the lead singer of a really awesome band called Eclipse. It's hard as hell to make it as a female rock singer. But I was matched up with an amazing group on the show and we hit it off really well. Things were going great for us. We released a record, and started touring. We were on a break from touring when I met James. Then after our second part of our tour, James started bringing me more and more into his group of friends.

He was a pretty famous singer, himself. He'd gone on the same route I did, a few years before, and he's been out here making a name for himself since then, and had a HUGE following.

The thing is, there had been whispers here and there about James, and him being a womanizer, throwing these crazy parties, different women all the time. I just never thought anything of it because I got caught up in his 'friendship' and him 'taking me under his wing' that I would've never thought any of it was true.

I should've listened to Jasper and Emmett. They said he was trouble.

When the cops came back with the results later on, they said there was no way to differentiate the samples… that they were contaminated and they couldn't match any of it to anyone that they said they could find from the party.

I don't know how hard they actually tried on that front.

The cops in L.A. don't seem like they give a shit. I know they've got a lot of stuff on their plates, but when someone says they've been raped, your first response shouldn't be 'oh she's a rock star, she goes to these parties all the time' or 'she was asking for it' or 'she should be grateful a rock star picked her to go home with, it'll further her career'.

First of all, no one ever asks for it. No one. There's no reason for anyone to take advantage of another person. Drug them, pass them around, take away their choices. EVER.

The cops also said James and all his little friends told them the same story as each other; that I took the drugs willingly, and got absolutely hammered and started dancing and flirting with all the guys there and taking off my clothes. That I came onto them and apparently, that's that for the L.A.P.D.

I tried to get them to further investigate, but they just brushed me off.

I even went to James to ask him, face to face, what the hell happened. Why he drugged me, why he thought he could use me as some sex toy and pass me around to his little friends. He looked at me and laughed. He said that I didn't do anything I didn't want that night. I told him different. That I never wanted to be treated like that, or ever have my control over my own body to be lessened. He just laughed again and pushed by me and said he did nothing wrong.

I went to the damn tabloids and told them what happened and there was this whole huge drama for over a year where people who followed James went out and slandered my name, told everyone that I was a whore, that I took advantage of James. He went out in his own defense and told this whole made up story about how I'm a crazed druggie myself and that he never would have taken advantage of me. He said he was too much of a gentleman to do such a thing…

Yeah right. And I'm the crowned prince of England…

Rose went out and defended me at every single turn. She was the best, but when James has more followers that are crazed fans and they do anything he says, then they can drown out my own fans that took my side of things and went on their own campaign against my sexual assault.

It didn't get very far. I did interviews, I went to anyone that would listen, even had my bandmates standing with me, but his reach seemed too far and wide. It was insane what a cult-like following will do for the guy they think they know from the persona he portrays to them. When in reality, he's a sexual deviant and drug abuser who lies and schemes.

My mom was beside herself when she found out. She flew out here to be with me after it happened, but she couldn't stay long. She kept begging me to come home with her, but I refused. She did what she could, but she had a job she couldn't just drop. After my dad died, she was left as a single parent, raising a daughter. And then I went on that damn show and look where I am now…

That's right! A has-been crazy rocker chick that has a drinking problem, playing some nights at the club I quietly became part owner of and trying to drink my memories of that night away.

My band kind of fell apart around me. We were still a tight group of friends, but once the James scandal went in his favor, our label eventually said that they couldn't have us representing them anymore.

Emmett got a job DJ'ing around L.A. and he's pretty damn good. He's always had a good ear for music. He should've been a music producer. I have him at the club on a regular basis whenever he wants.

Jasper started working at Rose's office. She's been teaching him the ropes about how to be a good agent. With Jasper's 'chill' attitude, he'd have no problem handling some of these diva types around this town.

Angela started working for NBC in the music department.

Over the past couple of years, I've seen the worst that Hollywood can bring out in people. The majority of people that I've met, aside from my band, gave me the shrug off once shit went sideways. Except for the night two years ago that I walked into a club/bar named New Moon. It was more relaxed than a club, but more upscale than a bar. There was a dance floor, a bar on two sides of the club, an area where there could be live performances or a DJ, and areas where you could get some food and enjoy the show for the night. I really liked it.

The owner, shockingly, was a fan and he heard I was there that night and came out to talk to me in the booth I was in.

Marcus, the owner, carried on a wonderful conversation with me. He let it slip that he was afraid that he would end up having to close his doors because he had fallen behind on his mortgage of the building. His wife had been diagnosed with cancer and everything he had went to her doctor bills and treatments. I didn't even think twice. I told him I'd become a silent partner and help him keep this place open. You don't find too many places like this out there, and a lot of the patrons in the club seemed to love it. It wasn't a question of was the club making money. It was a question of did Marcus think he could keep going at the rate he was and still be able to care for his still sick wife.

Marcus did have one request before we even signed anything. He wanted me to perform whenever I could. He said it was completely up to me, but he thought it would be a good addition to the rotation he had going on.

I told him I'd consider it. If he'd think about adding in a new DJ to the mix.

He quirked an eye at that. I told him about Emmett being a new DJ after the band fell apart, and it'd be a good opportunity for both parties.

Marcus readily agreed. So, Emmett and I had been doing performances, on separate nights, and even the odd one together. It was good exposure for us both.

I was a little apprehensive at first. What if people that came here were fans of James and started hounding me? What if I wasn't good for business?

It turned out to be a good thing. I still got to perform every now and then, New Moon stayed open, Emmett got exposure and started making a name for himself.

Yeah, I had the occasional hater start yelling at me from the crowd, but we dealt with it.

It's been a long road back over the last couple years to a somewhat normal life. As normal as possible, anyways.

At least it's been long enough that some of these people have forgotten or gotten over the whole thing.

I've been to support groups, counselling, doctors, etc. and I've gone over the whole 'it wasn't your fault', 'you didn't ask for it', 'don't let this take over your life', 'take what happened to you and turn it into something useful', 'don't let this bring you down. Get angry instead'…

So you know what I did? I got angry. I got angry at James, the assholes at the party, the people that doubted me, the people that sent me hate mail, the L.A.P.D., the fucking doctor that was a prick to me….

But mostly, I got angry at myself.

Despite what anyone else says, I put myself in that position. I let myself get sweet-talked by James. I let myself be naïve enough that that kind of thing wouldn't happen to me. I didn't wanna be another statistic or cliché. I always prided myself on being different and not doing things just because everyone else was doing it.

I woke up the next morning after my Starbucks antics, screaming from the nightmare I was having.

It was always the same; James' sneering face, him laughing at me and turning me away, the cops laughing at me, people chasing me down the street yelling at me, the nameless faces that were moving over me that night…

It's enough to make anyone wake up screaming, covered in sweat and crying.

I grabbed the bottle of whiskey that was on my nightstand and threw it across the room, where it smashed into a thousand pieces against the wall. I screamed into the still dark room and pulled the pillow over my face to try to drown out the world and all its shitty ways.

This happened on a pretty regular basis. At least once a week. The nightmares, the screaming, the anger and self-loathing that manifests into an entire day of wallowing and going to the gym I have set up in my house so I can beat the shit out of a punching bag.

Rose thought that was a better idea than drinking myself to death. She was right, but it's not enough to make me forget or get out all of the anger boiling inside me. Drinking eased some of the guilt I felt inside over being such a failure. Other times it amplified it. I guess it depended on what I was drinking.

Which is why I'm in my basement, music blaring, wailing on the punching bag in my gym. It definitely feels good to just beat the shit out of something, when the real object of my hatred isn't available to take said beating.

This is where Rose found me about an hour in.

"Bells! Jesus Christ, do you have to blare the music so god damn loud! I could hear it down the fucking street!" She screamed as she walked down the stairs and over to my docking station to turn down my music.

"Hey! I'm not done yet!" I yelled as I swung around to her.

I was a sweaty, panting mess and I didn't care at the moment. I wanted to keep going, but my hands were telling me it was time to ease up.

"Bad night?" She asked as she noticed the look on my face, and how agitated I was.

"You could say that…" I told her as I pulled the tape off my hands and grabbed a bottle of water.

"Was it before or after you destroyed a public building?" She asked and I could hear the fucking mom voice she pulled out for this occasion.

I contemplated her question for a minute then answered "Well, I'd have to say both. Shitty night at the club, where some asshole thought they'd get handsy with me. The little valley Barbie doll at Starbucks was giving me shit because I was just a little early for serving time, and I had a nightmare when I got home… So, yeah. Bang up night all around." I said in a lovely sarcastic tone as I walked past her to go upstairs and take a shower.

"Don't walk away from me Swan!" She yelled as she ran after me up the stairs. "You can't just lose your shit and break windows! They wanted to press charges against you, Bells! I convinced them not to and told them you'd pay for the damages!"

Walking into my bedroom, I grab some clean clothes from my dresser and start for the bathroom, but Rose is standing in my way.

"What?" I asked in an exacerbated tone. I just want a damn shower.

She sighs and takes the clothes from my hands and then grabs hold of my hands in hers.

"Bells… You can't keep going like this, honey. You've taken a baseball bat to a guy's car, you've gotten into smack-downs with numerous people, flipped off the media several times, walked out of interviews… You're giving them what they want. 'The crazy chick angle seems to be true, so the drugs and parties must be true, too.'. You're playing into his hand on how he painted you out to be in the tabloids. This has gotta stop." She said in a calming voice.

"Rose, I don't know another way to be anymore. I'm angry all the fucking time. I'm fed up with all these people thinking I'm some sort of crazed druggie liar that tried to ruin a 'wholesome upstanding gentleman's reputation'. I'm just… I'm tired and fucking exhausted. Mentally, physically, emotionally… I hate what he's turned me into." I feel the tears falling down my cheeks and I can't find it in me to feel ashamed that I'm crying in front of my agent.

"Oh honey. Come here." She says as she pulls me into a hug and just lets me cry on her shoulder.

She holds me for I don't know how long, just letting me cry my eyes out. After a while she pulled back and held my face in her hands.

"Look, go get a shower, and then come talk to me. I've got an idea that I want to see if you're up for. Now, go!" She turned me around and shoved me towards the bathroom.

A/N: Soooooo... yeah. Pretty gruesome for a woman to go through. Some of y'all questioned why she was acting like a crazy person... This is why. Every rape victim has a different reaction, and subsequently, their views of the world change.

On a side note; this is in no way a reflection on the actual LAPD. It's just in my story. Also, no, I'm not any sort of medical professional, so please don't flip out on the stuff from the hospital or the results from her tests. Again, it's just a story.

Hope you guys are still with me! I'll see y'all next time!