Creation began on 05-17-22

Creation ended on 05-26-22

Attack on Titan

The Pale One: Prologue

A/N: Not all seek to destroy Eldians out of fear and hatred…just as not all associates of Eldians will wish to be free of them.

The stories were all the same, one way or another, as even he heard of them. But what made him numb to the tales was that not all of them were the truth. As he grew older and colder to the touch of hatred, his clarity was still the same after his rebirth. He knew of the secrets this world had to hold…and some of the darkest ones were what he would carry to the grave once he had fulfilled his grand duty. For now, rest was needed until he could move again.

Hiding in the shadows of the abandoned city, sheltered in the ruins of a destroyed building that once housed families, he slumbered as his muscles rejuvenated. But he was far from defeated…just as he was far from the end that he sought with each step he took, with every blow he gave as much as he received. He could still remember how his life ended…and began anew. How it was the grace of a mother with a beautiful vision of a world remade to stand as one instead of scattered with disgust that saved him. Oh, how those memories were what kept him from swaying down the darkness of hate and succumbing to the heartache of lost hope.

"Wah…wah…wah…" The fading wailing of someone lost to him as he wandered the sandy night, whatever tears he had to shed long since dried away, but the stinging of the arrow that stuck out his back remained, and the blood-encrusted knife in his left hand still a sign that he was armed and dangerous.

He didn't remember much of his life from before, but he could never forget those faces. Those hate-filled, happy-shattering faces of men that despised people like himself for one reason or another. All he could recall was the screaming he heard, unsure of if it was the men screaming as the knife slit their throats…or just his own screams as he lunged at each one with the fury afforded to one that had just watched the people he had loved more than life itself get taken away forever…and then…how he had to get away when one of them, already on the verge of collapse, shot him in the back with an arrow. He didn't even know how long he was walking; whatever he could've reacted to was something he wasn't feeling at the time because of his numbness.

"Hey!" He heard a woman shout as a light was shined upon his face in front of him, and he saw some people he hadn't seen before. "There's a child out here!"

If he had seen his own face that night, he would've seen the dead expression shift to one of silent fright as his hand raised the knife up to defend himself. If this was how his life was to end, he wouldn't go down without a fight, even after what he went through.

"Look at him," someone else had said. "He must've come from the Asian tribes across the Grave Desert! He's from one of the commoner families."

"He crossed the Grave Desert?" Another person had expressed. "Those tribes were slaughtered by Marleyan soldiers a week ago! How'd he cross the desert with no food or water?"

"Oh, dear, he's wounded!"

That's when he saw her. She was unlike the rest of them in every sense of the way she appeared before him. Her hair, long and green like leaves or moss, her eyes as blue as the vast sky or deep ocean, and her dress of brown, blue and green colors in a stacking pattern. There was something about her that had him mesmerized; it was like he could tell her anything…if only he could remember anything about what happened to him.

Then…he dropped to his knees…and then to his left side. When he awoke sometime later, he was bandaged and inside a tent.

"You've been asleep for two days," he heard a voice nearby, turning to face the woman from earlier, sitting near him. "How do you feel?"

He didn't answer her. He didn't know how to answer her, even though he wanted to.

"It's okay if you don't speak," she had told him. "You've been through something traumatic and cruel. You probably don't even remember everything…but you're safe with us now."

He hadn't felt safe for quite some time. But here, around this woman, he did feel that way.

"My name is Gaia," she informed the boy. "As in Mother Earth…or Earth Mother. Whichever designation one prefers over the rest."

"My name is… My name is…" He tried to utter, but he realized something awful: He couldn't recall his own name.

He had lost his identity.

"…It was a miracle that the arrow missed his heart," one of the doctors informed Gaia. "He's suffering from memory impairment, both his short-term and long-term memory. Right now, he can't recall much of what happened before his wandering around the Grave Desert…or anything else that was before the attack on his tribe. He can't even remember his own name."

"Can he recover from this?" Gaia questioned. "Or…is this permanent?"

"Unfortunately, young children are incredibly fragile…but they're incredibly resilient, as well. He could go either way as time goes by."

Since he couldn't recall his name, Gaia gave him a new one to match his predicament with them: Pēruwan, which meant "The Pale One"…because he was pale-skinned when they encountered him in the Grave Desert.

-x-

As the new day arrived, Pēruwan had recovered from his injuries and stepped out of the ruins of the destroyed building. The entire city had been decimated by Marleyan soldiers and their expendable horde of Titans…and it sickened him to no end that such a nation would resort to such brutal actions against another nation that supported Eldian civil liberties and were unbiased towards them. Still, the memories of the past reminded him of why Marley was among those that had the most difficulties letting go of the past…and putting aside their would-be hatred of a race of people that were not entirely at fault for what their ancestors did to the ancestors of other people from other parts of the world.

Under Gaia's protection and training, Pēruwan became one of her group's most powerful warriors and the most efficient assassin. Because of his dedication and conviction to the cause, along with his faith in why he was doing all of this, his strength, speed and instincts were unmatched by others within Gaia's Restorative. Some would've considered Pēruwan…unnatural. And for a time…he wasn't like that at all, just capable of going after the worst of the worst in society…and leaving almost as quickly as he had appeared, like a ghost.

When Marley learned of my existence, I was only fourteen at the time, he thought as he walked through the ruined streets, finding some people that had managed to survive the desolation. They believed I was an Eldian or had Eldian interests in freedom and tearing down the government. But my interests aren't in the government. I believe in unity.

He reached down to pull a large slab off a man that was buried underneath it and checked for a pulse, finding none. But he found another man that had been under the slab and he was breathing, so he helped him up.

"Why?" He asked Pēruwan as he looked down at the deceased man. "Why is it so hard for Marley to let go of the past?"

Even after years of being with the Restorative, Pēruwan couldn't answer such a question; it was questions like this that eluded him of answers.

"Because letting go of the past is a sign of letting go of their hatred," they heard a woman say. "They can't admit to it, so they deny any possibility of moving past what happened long ago, even though most of whatever occurred was long before their time. For Marley, it's better to hate than to forgive."

"Why not just get rid of the Eldians of Paradis, then?" The man suggested, and Pēruwan looked at him. "They're the threat."

"That is not the answer," he finally spoke up. "It has been over a century since the Great Titan War, and the men and women responsible for the suffering of nations like Marley have been dead for longer than that length of time. This…is just unnecessary brutality against other nations that don't hate people from other parts of the world simply because they don't blame the people of now for the crimes committed by the people of then."

But even if Marley's majority of people didn't have any prejudice towards Eldians for their ancestral crimes, the minority, the people in charge, wouldn't tolerate their existence if there was a way to eliminate them in one move. Hatred and fear were powerful motivations for making people harm other people, but when used to stoke further hatred and fear in the hearts of other people, they became no different from propaganda used as a pathetic vanity project. But he didn't feel hatred towards Eldians…or Marleyans…or Asians or anyone that feared or hated him. All he felt…was pity for them. Pity…because they were too set in their ways to be capable of change and acceptance…unless shown a new way to let go.

"Aaaaaauurgh!" His memory of the night Marley tried to correct their mistake of failing to take him out along with his tribe, his parents, his past that had been taken from him, but all they had managed to do…was maim the future he was now committed to ensuring for the people of the world. "Aaaaahh!"

In the end, all but thirty-seven members of the Restorative were killed, including Gaia herself, who fell into Pēruwan's arms as they were surrounded by soldiers.

"Pēruwan," she had instructed him for the final time, "protect…protect the future we gave up everything to ensure. Protect…the innocent from the guilty. Ensure…the unity."

"Mother," he went as he shed two tears as her life ended, taken by Marley because they couldn't let go of their hatred and belief in coexistence being impossible. "Gaaaaaurgh!"

It was the first time he ever gave in to his rage…and let Marley know firsthand that he was a believer of change and acceptance…by removing those that wanted to stay rooted in the past with hearts full of hate that wouldn't allow for love or friendship with different people due to different cultures or beliefs. It was also during that night…that he became more than a man. He became…the very thing people had feared more than other people. More than the Titans.

"Are these are the Nine Titans, Mother Gaia?" Pēruwan had asked Gaia once when he saw a detailed picture of nine beings larger than the people around them in a book.

"Yes, Pēruwan," she answered him. "Over two-thousand years ago, when the world was still primitive and the people were unaware of their potential for coalition and expansion, there was a young girl named Ymir. She and her village had been attacked by a brutal man by the name of Karl Fritz and his village. He enslaved the people, had their tongues removed, and ruled them through fear and hatred. One day, he became angry because one of his pigs was let out of the pens and demanded to know the identity of the one responsible. Ymir was exposed…and Karl sentenced her to death…but she survived her would-be execution when she encountered…one of the saplings of Yggdrasil, the Tree of the World. Within it, she discovered the power to cultivate life…and was reborn. But her will, her consciousness, remained the same; she had been tortured by a man that was no better than the people that want to fight and kill people from other parts of the world today…and felt that she had no choice but to serve him."

"But that's…that's awful."

"Yes, it is. With Ymir's newfound power under his control, Karl Fritz expanded his reign across the land…and took the free lands of Marley at the time to solidify his brutal authority. When he had conquered his enemies through Ymir, he forced her to bear his children in between uprisings and assassination attempts, having three children, daughters, that would later inherit their mother's power when she was killed by a Marleyan that wanted to kill Karl Fritz. She took the attack that was meant for him…and died."

"But…couldn't she heal? I mean, she had the power to, right? She could live for a long time."

"Yes, she could…but her will to do so was compromised; Karl's lack of concern for her had broken her resolve to keep going. Unlike other people that ever discovered this power to harness life, Ymir Fritz only lived for thirteen years as a being of great power, a very short time. Barely a few specks of sand in the hourglass. When her life ended, the power she had obtained should've departed with her, but Karl refused to let such a power go to waste. He forced his daughters to consume their mother in the hopes that they would possess her power, and began the path of death and ruination to expand his influence long after he died, forcing them to have children, to have them consume their spines, over and over again, until all of the world was his. From the daughters of Ymir Fritz grew the entire race of Eldians that the world despises simply for their pain-filled history that was forced upon them. But they were victims, as well…and still are because of the memory of such violence and hatred that Karl installed in the world."

"And the Great Titan War from over a century ago? Was that because of Eldia or was it because of Marley, who fought back to retake their lands?"

"Both, actually. After Eldia had defeated Karl's enemies and enslaved them, the people that ruled Eldia began to turn on one another; nothing breeds war like suspicion and fear. Those with power that fear losing it will oppose others to keep their power, and thus the Great Titan War began. But there was a man, a descendant of Karl Fritz, bearing his name, that grew tired of the conflict…and let his contempt towards his own people's grim fate, past and future, take root in his soul."

She had told him everything that happened to put the Restorative on this path to peace and coexistence, and he refused to stop for anything. How the descendant of Karl Fritz used the power of the Titans, born from Ymir's passing and distribution of her power, to begin the downfall of the Eldian race instead of a simple method that was also possible to those that possessed the power to make it a reality, and kept up a ruse that could still be a threatening reality if allowed to happen. This, along with the fear and hatred of other parts of the world, not just Eldia's, was why Pēruwan and what remained of the Restorative had to keep going on, to negate the hatred so that it didn't fester into a full-blown plague of war and genocide. It was also why he, above all else, believed in the idea of peace and coexistence to the point that it wasn't a belief that was rooted deeply in his soul; ever since he was a foundling, Gaia had installed in him the understanding of how ideas were greater when people could agree with them all the time and not having a belief structure based around them.

"Having beliefs is wrong?" He had asked her when she explained the difference between ideas and beliefs.

"Not necessarily," she revealed. "It's just better to have ideas that everyone can agree on. You can change an idea when something doesn't work out, but changing a belief is harder, trickier, because people follow it to the ends of the Earth. They die for it, they kill for it. In the present, most people believe that in order to survive, the Eldians of Paradis Island, where the royal family relocated to after the Great Titan War, have to be killed, but because they refuse to actually go there just to talk with the people that live there, cut off from the rest of the world due to a lie that cuts both ways, nobody is even sure if there is another way to end the hatred without needing to cause unnecessary bloodshed. But eventually, Paradis is where we need to go, to assess the situation there and decide from there how to best deal with the matter and prevent what people recorded as the Rumbling."

"The threat to the world if the Titans within the Walls of Paradis were ever to awaken."

"Yes…and it's also why we need to reclaim the Unity. Marley hid it out of fear when they took it from Eldia, who took it from the people I left it with from the lands in the east, thinking it was a weapon that could be used to crush their enemies. But the Unity isn't a weapon meant to destroy anyone. It is what we need to end all of the hatred that people feel towards one another, removing their darkest qualities."

"But will the Unity also stop the Titans?"

"The Titans are just an extension of the power Ymir received from the sapling of Yggdrasil, but yes. The Unity will stop the Titans…if it can be found and put to use. But I have faith in you, Pēruwan. I have to believe in you, that those like you will end the hatred and bloodshed without the need to destroy countless lives."

Pēruwan, The Pale One, and on another level…someone that would cause the end of many to ensure a future of peace and coexistence rather than a future of despair.

Mother Gaia, he thought as he helped a woman carrying a baby in her arms, I may need to go to Paradis sooner rather than later…but I need to delay Marley. I need to cripple their Titan forces.

"Are you him?" The mother asked him. "The one Marley is afraid of? The Pale One?"

Pēruwan nodded his head in the negative; Marley didn't fear him. Not yet, at least, but they will. They will fear him…because he walked the path of life and death, of day and night. He could feel fear…and understand hope. His eyes had grown pale, but he was not blind.

The heart within him still beat, but wasn't as strong as one full of life was. He had forgotten how to react to the cold of the night, but he still longed for the warmth of another. But the promise of all that he lost returned to him was not to fulfilled until he had fulfilled his duty to the Restorative. Only then would he receive his grand reward, and it would be earned the right way, not the easy way.

Murder, war, genocide, those were the easy way…for cowards and people that didn't believe in hope. But stopping them before they could escalate, preventing them before they could begin, those were the right way…for those that didn't want to stop believing in the goodness of others.

"What will you do, sir?" A little girl asked him.

"Go to Marley," he answered her, "and after that…Paradis."

To be continued…

A/N: I don't intend for this to be a crossover, but it takes its influence from my earlier Evangelion story A New Cause, in which Shinji Ikari becomes the Horseman of Death for the Restorative. In this AoT story, it's still Shinji Ikari that becomes Death, but his name has been lost to him and as a horseman for the Restorative, he's little more alive than he is dead, and bits of his past based off the X-Men Evolution incarnation of En Sabah Nur/Apocalypse, but with a different drive to ensure a better future. There's more to come in the future, but will any of you be impressed by what comes next?