Chapter 46
Temari (one day later, approximate time: 7:00 AM)
They met outside the Council's meeting chamber. "We ready?" Temari asked.
Gaara hung back behind his siblings, his arms folded over his chest. Though, the gesture seemed more defensive than indifferent now. He met his siblings' eyes to convey quiet affirmation. Kankuro gave Temari a nod as well and she pushed open the doors.
V-Wrump. Thonk, the heavy door went.
The chamber was silent for a beat after the ambient discussions died down. Behind Temari, Baki had taken the rear passing the threshold to stay closer to Gaara and stepped aside to indicate for Gaara to precede him. Temari, in front, hadn't noticed and instead lifted her chin, striding forwards.
"Children of Lord Rasa! Baki-sensei! Welcome! Now that we're all here, we can begin. Baki, first of all, congratulations on guiding your young students through the perils of the Chunin Exams… hosted by Konohagakure, no less. As with the generals deployed to the region throughout the ordeal, you will be much rewarded."
She took in the room. The seat that would have been reserved for the Kazekage was empty, as were two of the twelve Council seats. Baki took a standing position where the atrium-sized statues of the former Kazekage were while his students bowed in greeting. Temari noted that, now, out of the corner of her eye. She and her siblings then followed.
Baki-sensei now bowed his head in response to the councilor. A more sensitive listener of the council member's preamble would best nonverbally run the speaker's words through a sieve. It was more along the lines of congratulations for managing a Jinchuriki they still considered dangerous—throughout the invasion of Konohagakure—than mere leadership of a team making it to the final rounds of the Chunin Exams. And it was a management skill the Council was intending to bribe to their side if they could, by that council member's speech.
A round of applause went up.
"And, of course, the effort of the genin team is not to be forgotten either," the council member continued. Temari recognized the woman as Senior Councilor—or just "Senior"—Erusa.
Another council member, Senior Sajo, then cleared his throat. "Unfortunately, however, we can't officially acknowledge that effort by granting you official chunin status. The needs of Sunagakure at this moment need to be put first, as they always have in the past. In light of recent events, officially pushing for a promotion now for any of the three of you could mean another issue with Konoha, further straining our own village's recovery. Therefore we currently have no choice but to do whatever it takes to appease Konoha with the results of the… invasion."
There was a pause as some of the council members frowned or gritted their teeth—not necessarily at the senior councilor—but for the statements on Suna-Konoha relations. They scraped much of the blame of the invasion onto Otogakure and the exiled Sannin that tricked them—or "tricked" them depending on your interpretation—but the fact that there would be little support from the daimyo of the Land of Wind was not missed by any of the council members.
"Now, that is not to say we cannot promote you at all, slated inheritors of the Kage position as you may be…" Senior Ryusa now said, taking over from the last two seniors. "Only that we have to be strategic about it. For that reason, it has been proposed that upon passing a Suna-proctored Jonin Exam, that you be allowed to jump in rank. Officially."
"Of course, that's not without its risks…" Senior Erusa reminded her colleague with a steepling of her fingers. "But because each village is given unrestricted control over who gets promoted to jonin rank without other villages weighing in, we can do that assuming you all survive… and pass the exam."
Around the room, there was a combination of nodded heads or narrowed eyes. Of the ones Temari recognized, she found it unusual to see Senior Sajo, the youngest maverick of the Council, narrow his eyes to the statement. She knew he was one of the two council members of the central Land of Wind religion, from what would appear to us as his choice of wearing a gol dastar type of turban—and controversial—because of his apparently clean-shaven face despite his religion.
Senior Joseki, the other from the central Land of Wind religion but more of a traditionalist, had nodded along instead, though Temari did not learn to recognize the council member by his name yet. She smiled to hide a grimace. She only knew five—maybe six of the twelve members of the Council—and only the ones either her father introduced to her or the ones so old they had become venerated throughout the entire Land of Wind.
To have to be courteous because the Council, with its combined weight and potentially undisclosed amount of resources actually held more power than a Kage—while having to wade through all of the bull—
"Won't the other villages take issue with that though?" Kankuro asked, interrupting Temari's mental storming.
There was a grumble of "no's" coming from everywhere around the Council table followed by remarks that other villages had done similarly before. It could be considered… implied… that it would be recommended to wait on attempting the Jonin Exam until after talk about the botched invasion of Konoha blew over. Temari felt the warning more than she heard it, but she did get it.
Kankuro gave his sister a look. Though, she didn't turn her head to acknowledge it beyond what she saw out of her peripheral view. They had grown up together and acting was not one of Temari's specialties. She swallowed the attempt of a smile that had been waning anyways.
"Thank you, Senior Councilors," Temari said with a bow, speaking on behalf of her siblings. For all of the Council's apparent veneration, not one of Baki's team bowed lower than twenty degrees—when the minimum formal bow called for thirty. Despite any meeting with the Council being meant to be a formal one.
Kankuro (approximate time: 8:00 AM)
He matched Temari's pace from slightly behind her after slipping out of the chamber.
"Temari! Wait! Temari! Temari!" Kankuro called out in his memory. The last time, she had not been in the mood to talk even when she had waited for him. Even though he knew they both could have used it.
He slowly let Temari speed away in front of him, after they left the chamber. She just needs time, he decided at last.
Still, Kankuro rounded the same corner that Temari did to leave. Out of the corner of his eye, Kankuro noticed Gaara had lingered by the chamber door to let Temari exit with a wide berth. And by extension, Kankuro himself. He knew Baki-sensei would have stayed in the Council meeting chamber, to confirm details and what not.
Kankuro took a detour.
Katiya (time: 15:23:42, hr/min/sec)
The journey to the arms base was a short one by intention. Rinji, Katiya's temporary partner, was meant to make haste to his side mission to re-establish order over there. And resecuring the loyalty of one of their arms dealers was also a fairly high priority, though less concerning in the eyes of Otogakure.
Said resecurement was a pretty bland fight too.
"Don't look so down," Rinji told her. "I'm pretty sure once we hit the other base, you can get some more steam blown off. Lord Orochimaru doesn't particularly care about the folks stuffed into prisons over there."
Katiya made no immediate response. "You're rather knowledgeable about Otogakure's happenings. I take it that it was with that understanding you knew the men there were indispensable in our superior's eyes?"
"Yeah, all depends on their usefulness, really. That's just the way it is, isn't it? I mean, I heard about what happened during your invasion mission—what happened to Dosu and all that, that's just Otogakure in a nutshell."
Katiya frowned. Of the team she had to "train" as genin for the invasion, Dosu, in her memory, had deserted. Zaku and Kin, on the other hand, were the ones who were presumably expended. She didn't understand the relevance.
"Don't tell me Kabuto didn't tell you."
Katiya stilled. She raised a brow under her balaclava.
Rinji tsked, shaking his head while smirking ever so slightly. "Dosu was killed off to take care of loose ends. He was only put in place as a strategy head to test Sasuke's. Once he was done, Lord Orochimaru just didn't need him after that so he was made to disappear as discreetly as possible. Same logic here—we need suppliers—so they have to be kept alive… for now."
She paused.
For now, Katiya finally mentally repeated. Somehow, the news that Dosu had been executed rather than being allowed to desert didn't seem to have any real impact on her. Sleeper Jutsu, her mind remarked dully. It wasn't Kabuto's fault that it was in his nature to follow Lord Orochimaru's orders. It wasn't Gaara's fault that it was in his nature to harm. It was just better Dosu be killed than her.
Gaara (approximate time: 3:00 PM)
Gaara stiffly meandered out of the council meeting chamber. Kankuro… had looked like he wanted to talk to Temari but Gaara thought it beyond his welcome to join in. He was not stupid either, being so trained by his father. He understood what the Council was thinking about him behind closed doors. He knew what others must have been thinking of him. Behind closed lips.
Needless to say, he didn't feel like heading back to his "home" given to him by his father, in the Kazekage building. He wandered the streets, keeping his eyes to the ground.
"D-d-demon—he's coming!" someone yelled someplace. Parents hurried to pick up their children and vacate the streets. Gaara paused for a moment as they moved, waiting for them to pass.
"But I just want to play." "Please—I don't want to be alone!"
HhhrrrraaGGGGGgggh, Shukaku growled softly. tRyiNg tO bORe mE to DeATH nOw? COME ON AND KILL SOMETHING ALREADY! ArEn'T yOU aFrAiD yOu'LL DiSaPPoiNT YoUr PreCiOuS LittLe MuMmy?
No, Gaara answered, moving now after everyone cleared the way.
"The Shukaku of the Sand within you is a weapon usually used for combat purposes, but the reason why the sand automatically protects you is because of love."
As he got closer and closer to the destination he felt was closer to his home, the number of people who ran—the number of people at all became less and less. Whereas everywhere else Shukaku had ravaged was repaired and sold to wealthy developers from the Land of Fire or the rare Suna native, one spot remained rubble. Haunted, apparently, if the rumors were to be trusted.
i SenSe SoME-Bo-DY! Shukaku sang in a sing-song voice. A rock came hurtling towards Gaara's head less than a second later. Their automatic sand barrier caught it. KiLL hiM—kiLL HIM—HuRL tHe DaMN ROCK BACK AND KILL HIM!
Gaara grabbed his stomach where his seal was. He felt like curling up into a ball—he had a headache too—Shukaku being all too loud now. He removed one of his hands from his stomach to clutch his head—peering past his sand barrier to see who the rock had come from. It was a kid younger than he was—just a kid.
"Hhhhfffffttttt…" Gaara wheezed, slowly letting his sand barrier drop and to the floor—the rock included.
THaT HaTrEd—thAt hAtrEd—dON't yoU juSt WaNt tO kiLL it?!? KiLL, kiLL, KILL! Shukaku switched back to his sing-song voice. LiTTLe GaaaaH-RRrraaaHHhhh!
Gaara slowly let go of his stomach though his headache—and his body—was still… angry. He took a step forwards, slowly releasing his stomach. He wasn't quite thinking, but focusing heavily on the ground rather than the kid who had thrown the rock. When his headache finally started to abate, he let go of his head, taking a look behind himself now. It wasn't one kid—but two. An older and a younger—the younger hidden behind the older.
Gaara took in a breath. He sensed something that Shukaku didn't seem to pick up on. They—the kids—were both afraid, not angry. Their clothes—Gaara looked down at his own. He felt like his surroundings rotated slowly with the onset of another headache. He had bathed himself when he got back into Suna—and changed his clothes. He had some—originally new—from his Father's… care packages. His clothes were not the tattered things he wore after his last battle. But the kids' clothes—
Even his father for all his wrongs, still sent him care packages—but what about—
The kids, having seen Gaara now take interest in them, took off running with a fearful yell.
"Wait!" Gaara called. I just wanted to talk—!
Shukaku himself let out a forceful yell of annoyance.
—where are your parents—was I—did I—
Gaara was able to ignore Shukaku this time. And he let the kids run farther and farther away. He wanted to reach out to them—but he knew—from his memory—forcing them to stay would not help him ease the loneliness he had in his chest.
—how—I don't know how—what can I—I'm sorry—
Kankuro (approximate time: 3:00 PM)
"Don't you know what you did? Don't you feel remorse for them—the people you killed?!?"
Senior Ebizo—Lord Ebizo—Kankuro had recognized him, those long wizened eyebrows of his—from when he met with Lady Chiyo just the once. He, of course, knew the man existed and was a part of the Council but he hadn't thought—with Lady Chiyo's aversion—that Lord Ebizo would be in the highest ranking position of the Council Seniors though every bit of public news at least suggested it. The information had been there, but he hadn't processed it.
"Letting it go doesn't mean forgiving him—not yet—not if you don't want to. Just don't let it dominate your life—don't let it churn out more regrets… If every shinobi on this plane acted out their desires for revenge, to the degree they desire, there won't be a single man, woman, or child left here."
He didn't want to. Kankuro still remembered his classmates. But Gaara… Watching Gaara the past few weeks, it had become clear to Kankuro that his brother was not without remorse. Now, after everything they had been through in Konoha and with their father. Now, it was just very clear. He didn't want to forgive Gaara then, but now it felt pointless to not. After everything, it was just feeling like the right thing to do.
Gaara (approximate time: 3:10 PM)
If the rumors were to be believed, the neighborhood Gaara was in was haunted. One might wonder why… And Gaara himself didn't quite understand what about the neighborhood would lead to that conclusion. But he did know… it was where Yashamaru's house was.
The adobe bricks that once made up the house were crumbled around a wooden frame and collapsed clay-covered roof. Gaara, in a trance, walked towards it. Though Shukaku might have said something, Gaara did not hear him even in his own mind. His eyes were fixed on the explosive—only slightly discolored—patch—stain on the roof.
The small particles of his sand—via his connection with Shukaku and having slowly practiced with her—Katiya—could have been made up of bone, stone, metal, and possibly shell. Trace amounts of bone and shell could likely still be found in his sand—from—she had brought shells with her—to him—from the Land of Waves.
It wasn't his intention—he hadn't meant—
—Yashamaru had no family beyond Gaara and his siblings, not anymore. Not after his sister had died. He was an ANBU member. Shinobi, missing bodies in battle were common—
It didn't feel right to use any chakra in that moment, to bring himself closer though he wanted to be. Gaara planted his knees to the ground in the safest location to be, without needing to use chakra to lift or hold himself, still in view of the collapsed rooftop. The one spot he knew—
Gaara bowed. Deeply, pressing his head to his hands from where they were, on the ground. Once, twice, three times. It probably wasn't a full, formal dogeza. He didn't know how to. But kneeling and bowing felt… right. He began to cry. Though Shukaku—though his father's regulations—were drilling into him, he paid them no heed. Crying, too, felt right. Felt natural. Yashamaru had no funeral—Gaara's father—Yashamaru's only real relation—would have been too busy—dealing with everything. As always.
...
Gaara would carry a part of Yashamaru with him so long as he lived. He could not help it—bone, not being magnetic and being nearly as dense as stone could not easily be extracted from his sand—and he did not know how to himself.
Gaara would carry a part of Yashamaru with him so long as he lived. He would not attempt to stop it—the memory of Yashamaru as the man who had raised him when his father would not was something he was willing to carry forever if he could. He would live in Yashamaru's memory. All parts of it.
Temari (approximate time: 3:30 PM)
Temari hiked the stairs up to Sen's apartment building. She should have graduated at the very least, Temari hoped. She knocked on the apartment building.
"Hey. Temari!" Sen exclaimed, apparently having pulled open the door without checking.
"Oh… hey!" Temari exclaimed back, eying what was her friend's new haircut.
Sen fluffed her hair self-consciously. Her previous long braid had been trimmed to chin-length, her naturally frizzy hair then secured by a bandana into an earthy blonde plume behind her head. A single braid of thin side hairs, probably a throwback from her old look, hung from the side of her face.
"I had it cut for the invasion—I didn't want to risk someone pulling on my braid... I kind of miss having my hair up higher though, but my hair's too short for that now," Sen explained, "…You here for something? Want to come in? My parents are out for work, but you can hang out here for a bit."
"Sure," Temari said, entering.
…
"No training today?" Temari asked as they made their way to the dining room.
"I do, but it's not until later. I honestly think sensei's given up on us. Besides the invasion, we've had only two other missions… and they were both D-ranks. Training's been seeming kind of… pointless and everyone's been going on about how even though the Chunin Exam would be when we'd be eligible for more missions… that they're… probably not going to happen for Suna for a while."
Temari rubbed her forehead. Right.
"Yasu hasn't given up yet though. I think out of all of us, he'd be the first one to make chunin once this all blows over. If it blows over," Sen continued.
Yasu? Temari frowned at the unknown name.
"My other teammate, besides Yome. We got stuck together when we graduated. You probably don't know him though—he's from the other class because we had an odd number of kids."
Temari's frown deepened. Technically her father's order in regards to her unpaid Academy "mission" was to watch over the students in the school and ensure that they are up to par with the standards of Sunagakure. A thought of her father berating her irresponsibility and blatant disregard for command—and how it would affect how people would view her future leadership—rolled through her mind. Her staying so close to Sen's class technically should not have happened—since every student was meant to have fallen under her watch at some point.
"But what brought you here anyways? Not like you to visit—I figured there was something?" Sen asked, pulling Temari out of her head.
"It's just the aftermath of my Father's… death," Temari told her. "They were talking about chunin promotions. Kankuro's got it in his head that the Suna Council's not about to stick a genin in their meetings, but that if I pass the village Jonin Exam, that I could just go straight to that."
"Go for it!" Sen replied. "You've always been crazy about the shinobi ranks and military command."
Temari hesitated. Very likely the Council would take the date she passed the Jonin Exam and stamp that to her Chunin Exam pass date as a well—since such jumps in rank were technically underhand as-is. But since she could argue she probably did pass the Chunin Exam the first time if not for the invasion—
"I guess I'm just nervous," Temari said at last. "The moment I make jonin, I think the Council would stick me as the Kazekage… I don't know. It's a lot of responsibility."
"I'm sure you'll make a good Kazekage, Temari," Sen replied. She paused, as if mulling over the responsibilities of leadership and Temari's temperament. Or at least, that was what Temari thought Sen was doing. Sen tilted her head, "Unless you don't want to? Do you want to become Kazekage?"
Temari frowned again. It wasn't like she had a choice—she had to because Kankuro wouldn't—too used to sticking to the shadows where the puppetry happened to stand in the light of leadership for the people. Temari told Sen that much.
"What about Gaara—is he—? I mean, probably not the best, but he's… also… ? An option? I mean, he's pretty scary and I'm pretty sure there'd be a riot if he's announced as Kazekage, but if a Kage's supposed to be able to protect his soldiers and lead wars and all that—I mean—he hasn't killed any of us recently, has he?"
"Well, Temari, do you think you have what it takes to control your youngest brother compared to it?" her father asked her from her memory. The thought had been coming up a lot recently.
Temari widened her eyes. "You want Gaara as Kazekage?"
Sen widened her eyes as well, now. "Well, I—we didn't exactly have a say about Lord Rasa—your father—becoming Kazekage. I'm just saying if he does become Kage, he'd have a lot more power to defend us… uhh—" Sen broke off knowing how touchy Temari could be about power levels. "I'm just saying it could be an option," she finished, covering for herself.
Temari blinked. The Council wouldn't stand for it—and very likely end up pushing for her again… but would anyone dare stand up against a Jinchuriki?
"I mean, it's all assuming he doesn't kill us first and all that," Sen joked sheepishly, self-consciously playing with her shortened hair braid.
Temari didn't notice, her mind deep in thought.
Gaara (approximate time: 4:00 PM)
Gaara had lifted the collapsed roof off the building. The ANBU likely removed all sensitive documents and paraphernalia out of the area after the scene cleared up, but the entire area was still left in ruin. Flashes of memory—him crushing the building and pulling sand from it—cleaving the roof off an adjacent building—flicked through his mind. It had seemed so easy to destroy the area… and as he was finding, so much harder to put it back together.
He had the roof placed beside him as he worked on the walls of Yashamaru's old dwelling, but he didn't know what to do. Moving the old adobe bricks into place worked except for when a brick was made up evenly—but there were several that had been destroyed when he pulled sand from them. And using his own bare sand to substitute wouldn't work—he knew from building sand-forms that they'd dissolve if he wasn't there… And he didn't know how to make adobe.
He examined a brick. He could see bits of grass in it, some sand. The bulk of it appeared to be dirt, however.
"It's probably grass, clay, and some sand," a voice confirmed behind Gaara. "Exact ratios vary by regional builder, and some of the older buildings used fermented cactus juice for waterproofing rather than the asphalt emulsion we use nowadays, but it's mostly that. It takes a while to bake the bricks out in the sun though, even though it's as bright as it is here."
Gaara turned around—Kankuro. Shukaku hadn't said anything about Kankuro's approach even though after announcing his own presence, Shukaku began grumbling his usual kill-happy nonsense. Gaara gave his brother a wide-eyed stare, Kankuro in the black uniform he wore to the Council meet, his hands in his pockets nonchalantly.
"You're also going to need some adobe mortar or plaster for those bricks or they'll topple as you go higher, or during a land tremor," Kankuro continued, pointing to Gaara's re-stacked wall.
Gaara looked back over to his wall. "I did not know that." There was a pause. "What are you doing here, Kankuro?"
Kankuro smiled. "Thought I'd check up on you. I was wondering what you'd been up to… Didn't think it'd be restoring Yashamaru's old place, though."
There was a moment of silence.
"I did not mean to," Gaara said quietly, as if talking to Kankuro but not to any verbal question of the latter's. "It was like something had come up inside of me—Shukaku. I did not know how to stop it… and at the time, I did not… a person had attacked me… The person… I did not know it was Yashamaru."
Kankuro didn't say anything to that immediately, as if not knowing what to say.
Gaara continued, "Shukaku took over that day, and what Yashamaru had told me that day…" Gaara placed a hand over his stomach where Shukaku's seal was. "After that day, I began thinking… that my purpose for being born was to kill."
He took a breath, slowly. He turned around slightly to look back at Kankuro. There was a look in Kankuro's eye now—concern? But not as if Kankuro was concerned for himself.
"Do you still think that now?" Kankuro asked.
"No. Naruto had changed that… I can live for myself, and love myself… but I don't have to live for just myself. Love just myself. I can be stronger if I live for others. Love others like Naruto does."
Kankuro shifted his glance downwards. What was friendship if not a platonic form of love? After a moment he said, "Come on, I'll go buy you some mortar and plaster, and see if they have some premade adobe laying around at the construction warehouse. Shouldn't be too expensive."
Gaara's eyes widened and Kankuro gave him a grin, some emotion Gaara couldn't name in his brother's eye.
Author's Note
In my mind, this chapter could have been a part of the previous arc… but ehh.
Erusa is a made up name for a member of the Suna Council that did not previously exist in canon. She is now one of the two (out of twelve total) female members of the Suna Council. Apologies, but that gender disparity is intentional on my behalf. Canonically, I believe it was zero out of twelve—unless one counts the female council member from novels (which I have not read). Then I believe it is one unless there is a translation error.
The other seniors named—Sajo, Ryusa, and Joseki are all canonical to the anime. Though their backstories are ambiguous and I therefore call "artistic liberties" for what I do to said backstories. And a note on Sajo—emphasis on the apparently clean shaven face. The reason for why the emphasis on those words should become apparent in a few arcs if it is not already.
Also, "Yasu" is an OC, but he'll barely be mentioned in the coming arcs.