Jaune and Courage the Cowardly Dog
Chap 94: The Uncommon Cold
"Never knew you would be such a lady killer, Jaune." Yang teased for the hundredth time as we entered the house.
"We get it, Yang. We get it." I said, annoyed as we put away all the groceries and medical supplies we brought while we were in town earlier.
"Though, while I am inclined to say the haircut does suit you, Jaune, I do not feel it is worth the trouble." Weiss said, tired from everything that happened today.
"I'm just irked that Blake didn't tell me about it earlier. I could have gotten a lot more teasing in before coming here." Yang said, casting a glance at Blake.
"Why would I have to tell you about Jaune's haircut? Plus, I spared everyone's ears of your terrible puns by not telling you." Blake said, never taking her eyes off her book. However, it wasn't her typical book but rather a medical textbook.
"Does Iris knows what's happening and the haircut?" Ruby asked.
"Yes, she does. We talked about it." I answered.
"Where is-ACHOO!" Penny asked, only for a harsh sneeze to cut her off. "She?"
We were currently returning from an impromptu shopping trip to town. Muriel caught a nasty cold suddenly and went through all our tissues and supplies in less than an hour. That is how severe the cold was. But while I was out getting everything we needed to take care of Muriel, I ran into Team Rwby and Penny. Weiss explained that Pietro Polendina asked them to watch over Penny while he was working on another project for Ironwood to track down the mysterious maiden. They agreed, and seeing that they had a small break from classes, they decided to visit Nowhere with us, meeting at the supermarket. However, to my surprise, Penny had caught a cold. Learning this worried me as I wasn't sure if Penny's now natural immune system could protect her as it was still relatively new. Luckily, it didn't seem significant and appeared to be only a nasty cold, a bad cold that bared a striking resemblance to the one Muriel caught.
"You okay, Penny?" Ruby asked as the sneeze was quite loud.
"Yes, Ruby. I am fine. But my throat is sore, and my nose hurts a little." She answered.
"Jaune, do you know of any home remedies that could help her?" Weiss asked.
"And OTC medicines don't seem to have any effect." Blake quickly added.
"A few. Let me put these away, and I can get to making it. Then I can make us some breakfast." I said as we grabbed the bags. But before we could head into the kitchen, the sound of Muriel sneezing caught our attention.
"AH-AH-AHH-AHCHOO!" Not wasting time, we picked up the bags and rushed into the kitchen to see Muriel trying to serve Eustace his breakfast. However, she sneezed the eggs into his face due to her cold.
'AAHHH!' Courage gasped.
"Mom. I said I would make breakfast when I get back with the groceries." I said, putting down the bags before moving to her and helping her to her seat.
"I know, dear. But Eustace wanted his breakfast." She explained before sneezing.
"He's got two working arms and legs. He can make his own breakfast." Yang said, growling with everyone else glaring at Eustace.
"SHUT IT!" Eustace said, lowering his newspaper to show the two sunny-side eggs still on his face. He then turned to face Muriel. "MURIEL! WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO DO?! GET ME SICK! OH!"
"Okay, that's just gross." Weiss said, gaging a bit when Eustace ate the eggs that Muriel sneezed on moments ago.
"I'm sorry, Eustace. This is the worst cold I ever-" Muriel began, but another sneeze stopped her.
"Jaune." Penny said, getting my attention.
"Yes."
"What are you-" She began but stopped when a violent sneeze sent her back. Luckily, she fell into the chair Ruby quickly pulled out for her. "What are you going to need for breakfast?"
"Don't worry about it. Just rest. Let me make the remedy, and then I'll get started." I told her.
"Perhaps a wee spot of tea will fix us up." Muriel said, about to get up, but Weiss stopped her.
"We will make it, Muriel." She said before moving to the cabinet where we store all the tea types we have while Yang added water to the kettle.
"What tea would you like?" Blake asked.
"Ginger, please. Thanks, dearies."
"Would you like some tea, Penny?" Ruby asked.
"Yes-AH! AH! AH!" She began before feeling another sneezing forming.
"Courage, tissues." I said when Muriel also began to wind up for a sneeze.
'Right.' He said before grabbing a box and tossing one to Ruby and me. He then grabbed one for himself, took out twelve tissues, and formed a glove out of them.
"Okay, Penny. Let it go." Ruby said, doing the same. Although, she also formed an umpire's mask to wear as well.
"AH-CHOO!" They both sneezed. But to our great surprise, Muriel and Penny sneezed out what appeared to be a projection of a slug.
"What the?" We all asked, confused and slightly nervous.
"Well, hey." The slug, who we just realized is chained, said, waving.
'AAAHHHH!' Courage screamed, sending the tissues all over the floor.
"We don't want any." Eustace said, not even paying attention.
"Did someone say something?" Muriel asked, holding her head.
"Uh, no." Yang said, not sure we had just seen.
"I do believe I heard someone say-" Penny began but stopped when she and Muriel started winding up for another sneeze. But the same thing happened with the projection of the chained slug returning.
"OH, MY!" Muriel said, shocked.
"Uh, what is happening?" Penny asked, confused.
"This here urgent message has been prerecorded right into the cold and sent by magic." The slug said.
'AAAHHHH!' Courage screamed, his eyes screwing out of his head like light bulbs.
"I knew this wasn't an ordinary cold." Muriel said as the projection faded.
"And that would explain why none of the medicine we gave to Penny worked." Weiss said, making the connection.
"But should we listen to the message or ignore it?" Ruby asked.
"As much as I want to say we ignore it, I say we listen to it." Blake answered.
"But how will we listen to the rest of the message?" Penny asked.
"Sory, Penny. But it seems like for us to hear the message, you and Muriel will have to sneeze again." Yang answered, wincing when she recalled how painful the sneezes appeared.
"Can we-ACHOO!" Peny began, only for her and Muriel to sneeze simultaneously. Luckily, the message returned as a result.
"We apologize for your discomfort, having to send you both this cold and all, but we sure need your help." The chained slug said.
"Help? Help with what?" Ruby asked.
"It's a prerecorded message, Ruby." I reminded her.
"We'll explain everything in detail when we meet in person. For now, just know that we all are slaves in a sweatshop. We'd be obliged if y'all would come and set us free."
'Someone get a paper and pen so we can write down the location.' Courage said, screwing his eyes back in his head.
"Right." I said, running over to a drawer, opening it, and pulling out a pen and pad.
"And just so you know, those colds ain't going away till you get your sneezing self down here for the cold. Here's how to get where we are." The chained slug said, pulling out a map. He then began to give the coordinates and how to get to his location.
"Do you think we can grab the map from the message?" Blake asked as the projection of the slug disappeared, but the map remained.
"Possible." I answered as I finished writing down the directions.
'Let's see.' Courage said, putting on an oversized medical glove and reaching out to grab the map, which he managed to do.
"Okay. Now that we have the map, where do we have to go to free the slugs?" Weiss asked.
"To the state known as Arkansas. It has the biggest bayou in the country, and that's where the slugs are being kept captive." I answered.
"And how far is it?" Yang asked.
"Eight hours by car and about an hour by plane. But we would still need to travel a bit by car to get to our destination."
"Do you even have enough money, Jaune? I mean, you did take a few trips recently, and all of them were by plane." Blake asked.
"Yes, but it does not matter how much it costs. All that matters is getting Muriel and Penny cured."
"Thanks, Jaune. You such a dear." Muriel said before blowing her nose.
"And a good friend." Penny added.
"Okay, that settles it. After we eat, we head to the airport to head to Arkansas to save the slugs." Weiss said.
"But we better grab some supplies like bug spray, sun block, and a spare set of clothes." Blake said, not looking forward to getting bitten by bugs.
Ten Hours Later
Bayou Swamp
"Wow, this is one big swamp." Ruby said, amazed.
"This isn't a swamp, Ruby." I said as Yang and I continued to paddle down the water. "It's a bayou."
"What's the difference?" Penny asked, curious.
"A swamp is a wetland with trees while bayous are slow-moving creeks." Weiss explained.
"But they both have plenty of bugs and high humidity." Blake said, applying another coat of bug spray.
"Can one of you check the map to see if we're still on the right course?" Yang asked.
"I think we are. Everyone, look." Muriel said, pointing ahead of us.
"Woah." We all said, surprised but slightly worried when we noticed the numerous stuffed puppets resembling snakes. But we became grossed out when we realized the puppets were not cloth but snakeskin.
"I think we found the spot." Muriel said as Yang, and I changed direction to land on a small clearing free of tall grass.
'I don't like this.' Courage said, shivering as the snakeskin puppets towered over us.
"Courage. I don't think they are real." Muriel said before coughing.
"What kind of snake is that?" Penny asked, sniffling as Courage and I helped Muriel out of her chair.
"I have no idea. I know of some snakes that live in the bayou, but none of them are this long." I answered.
"They seem similar in length to a black mamba. But the color is wrong." Weiss said.
"Hopefully, we don't find any snakes. And if we do, let's pray to Oum that they aren't poisonous." Blake said.
"Okay, now that we are here in the bayou. Where do we find the slugs?" Ruby asked.
"The map should show us where the slugs are located. But before we go." Yang answered before reaching into one of the bags and pulling out cough medicine and some aspirin. She then took out a few pills while Weiss poured the correct amount of cough syrup into a measuring cup. "Take this."
"Alright." Muriel said before taking the aspirin, followed by the cough syrup.
"I still can't get over the bad taste of medicine." Penny said, not liking the taste of the cough syrup.
"We know. But it will make you feel better or, at the very least, make the symptoms more tolerable." Weiss said while grabbing the bags we brought.
"But now, let's make our way to the slugs to free them and get them to cure you both." Yang said as she grabbed the map.
"Which way should we go, Yang?" Blake asked, waving away some flies.
"It should be-," She began but stopped when we heard the sounds of someone or something making their way through the tall grass. Worried that it might be a snake or the thing that killed them, we readied our weapons. But, thankfully, it was only one of the slugs we came to free from captivity. Although, we were confused about why it was putting up the snake puppet.
"Well, hey. I didn't mean to scare you. Just setting up a statue of Big Bayou." The slug said before piercing the ground with the bottom of the snake statue.
"Who's Big Bayou?" I asked.
"Big Bayou. He's the snake that got us shackled here."
"ACHOO!" Penny and Muriel sneezed.
"Bless you." We said.
"Those two ladies must be the ones that caught the colds we sent. Glad you all could come to free us. Why don't y'all come on inside, and we'll explain the whole mess to you." The slug said before returning to a cave made out of the grass.
"Come on, everyone. Let's see what we can do to help." Muriel said before sneezing.
"Take it easy, mom." I said as we helped her and Penny into the slug's home. But as soon as we entered, we were greeted with the sad sight of multiple shackled slugs stuffing more snake statues with leaves. However, they stopped and turned to us when they heard Muriel and Penny sneeze.
"THEY'VE COME TO SAVE US!" The slug wearing a propeller hat cheered.
"Take it easy, slugs. We owe our guests some explanation." The slug we had just met, which we now realized is the leader, said. "It's like this. Big Bayou's a powerful snake and very vain. He loves himself. He kept us prisoner, here for years. Us making the stuffed statues of him out of the skin he sheds. It's torture."
"Yeah. And the dental coverage sucks." The slug with the propeller hat said while showing that he only had one tooth in his mouth.
"Big Bayou's magic put us here, and only Big Bayou's magic can break our shackles."
"But what about curing Penny and Muriel?" I asked after they violently coughed again. Courage even transformed into a miniature Muriel to help get the message across.
"Uh, well, we'd love to cure them, but uh..." The lead slug began.
"We don't know how." The young slug finished.
"We were only able to steal just a smidge of magic from Big Bayou- Just enough to get our message out in a microbe." The lead slug explained with the young slug pulling out the paper.
"You've got to find a way-" Muriel began, but a sneeze cut her off, causing the rest of the slugs to retreat to the other side of the room.
"Where can we find the rest of the spell?" Yang asked.
"Well, all you got to do is get your hands on Big Bayou's book of Big Bayou magic. He's got all his magic in there. Then you can cure your friends." The lead slug answered.
"Yeah. And free us." The young slug added, with the other slugs joining.
"I'll try." Muriel said but sat down afterward as she began to feel dizzy. "Maybe I'll take a wee nap first."
"I'll take one as well." Penny added, sitting down.
"GET US OUT OF HERE! HURRY!" The other slugs kept repeating. Luckily, a single shot from Yang's gauntlets silenced them.
"Alright, now. Where does Big Bayou keep his book of magic exactly?" Weiss asked, glaring at the other slugs.
"He keeps it in his bedroom and prefers to keep it in his lair at all costs." The lead slug answered.
"What kind of snake is Big Bayou anyway?" Blake asked.
"Don't let his skin color fool you; it might be red, but he is a black mamba. And Big Bayou recently used magic to enhance his venom."
"Weiss, will our aura protect us from the venom if he bites us?" Ruby asked.
"Normally, yes, with the worst-case scenario being us feeling mild tingling in our appendages. But since Big Bayou enhanced his venom, I am not sure." She answered.
"We better be careful then, as we're far from any hospital, and there are no home remedies that can cure snake venom." Yang said.
"Where is his lair?" I asked.
"Follow the path outside and keep going straight when it ends. You'll eventually find another path that leads to Big Bayou's lair." The lead slug answered.
"Alright. Let's-ACHOO!" Penny said, getting up only for her sneeze to send her back down.
"No, Penny. Stay here. You and Muriel are too sick to come." Ruby said, handing Penny some more tissues.
'Someone should stay behind to watch over them.' Courage said.
"Right. But should stay behind?" Blake asked.
"I think Ruby and I should stay behind. We will be able to hold off anything that comes here while also easing Penny and Muriel's suffering. And if all else fails, Ruby can use her semblance to get everyone out quickly." Weiss answered.
"All right, then. We'll be back shortly, everyone, with the book." Yang said as we exited the cave.
"Good luck." Muriel said before coughing.
Nodding, we readied our weapons, exited the cave, and followed the only path we could see. And just like the slug said, the first path did end after a few moments, but the second path revealed itself seconds later. Although, the numerous snake statues did keep us going in the correct direction.
"Wow." We all said as we reached the trail's end and saw Big Bayou's lair.
"Either he's in vain like the slug said, or he is really in love with himself." Yang said when we realized the lair was in the shape of a snake's head.
"Anyway. Let's just get the book and return to the others. The-" Blake began but stopped when the door to Big Bayou's lair opened.
"Quick. Hide in the grass." I said as we moved into the tall grass.
'That must be Big Bayou.' Courage said as a massive red snake slithered out.
"Hopefully, he leaves, so we don't have to worry about him." Yang said.
"Quiet." Blake said as Big Bayou began to look around. Luckily, it seemed like he was doing so out of habit rather than hearing something.
"Hello, me." Big Bayou said, talking to a snake statue and poking it with his tail. "Don't I look fine? I am so beautiful. I think I'll go and see how all the other Mes are doing, but first."
"Never seen a snake shed its skin like that before." Blake said as Big Bayou slithered out of his skin before quickly grabbing his hat.
"AHH!" Big Bayou said before tossing the old skin onto a nearby pile. He then slithered toward the direction of the bayou. "I am pretty. I love me."
"Quick, before he slithers back here." I said as we exited the tall grass and rushed to Big Bayou's door. However, Big Bayou locked it before he left. "Damn, it's locked."
"I got it, lady killer." Yang said, pushing me to the side. She then grabbed the handle and effortlessly ripped the door off its hinges.
"I would have preferred it if used a more stealthful route, but this works." Blake commented, mildly annoyed.
"Either way, let's just get the book and get out." I said as we entered Big Bayou's lair.
We were worried the book would be in a well-hidden spot for a moment. Luckily, there were only three rooms, one being a bathroom and the other being the main room which Big Bayou sparsely decorated. And the final room was Big Bayou's room. Thankfully, it wasn't big either, and we quickly spotted the books. Although, we were confused by the first book as it was about motivational thinking. The second book we spotted was about various party tricks, and when the others weren't looking, I placed it into my bag.
'Could use it for later. Plus, Adrian's birthday is coming soon.' I thought. But my attention shifted when I heard Big Bayou's voice. Walking over to the eye window, Courage and I looked out and saw Big Bayou in a hot tube.
"I can't wait to look in my mirror. I love my look after I've looked at all my Mes." He said, talking to the other stuffed statues of himself.
'We better hurry.' Courage said as we stepped away from the window.
"Right." I agreed.
"FOUND IT!" Yang shouted, holding up a worn book.
"Alright, let's get-" I began, but the sound of Big Bayou interrupted me.
"OOH. I am so lucky to be me." He said.
Not wasting any more time, we rushed out of the room and out of Big Bayou's lair. But before we left, we made sure to put back the door as best as possible to make it appear as if nothing was amiss. We then rushed into the tall grass to avoid Big Bayou spotting us.
Five Minutes Later
"Okay, we're back." I said as we rushed into the cave. Only to wince, we saw how miserable Penny and Muriel were due to the uncommon cold. Their skin was now green, and each had warts all over their face.
"ACHOO!" They both sneezed with their heads inflating like a balloon.
'AAAHHH!' Courage screamed.
"Did you guys find the book?" Ruby asked as she walked up to us while Weiss gave Muriel and Penny more medicine.
"Yes." Blake answered as she placed the book on the table.
"THEY GOT THE BOOK!" The young slug announced before heading toward us. "BUST US FREE! COME ON!"
"Feel free to cure your friends first." The lead slug said, pulling the younger slug back.
"Please hurry." Penny said as she took her medicine. Not wanting to see them suffer anymore, we opened the book and quickly flipped through the pages. Luckily, we found it after a few seconds.
"Okay. To cure The Uncommon Cold, have a four-legged creature perform this ritual." I read before turning to Courage. "Corry, Courage. It looks like you're going to have to do this."
'Alright.' He said before taking a few steps back. He then began to perform the ritual precisely, which, weirdly enough, required him to act like a chicken.
"How is this supposed to be the cure?" Ruby asked, scratching her head as we watched Courage crow like a bird.
"I am not sure." I answered.
"Well, it doesn't seem to work." Muriel said between coughs.
'Maybe we should-' Courage began, tired but stopped when he started to grunt inexplicably. But before we could say anything, he laid an egg which stunned us.
"Oh, my." Muriel gasped.
"Uh." The rest of us said, too stunned to say anything.
"What happened?" Ruby asked. Turning to her, we saw that Yang had reflexively covered Ruby's eyes.
'HA! HA! HA! HA!' Courage said, embarrassed. He then got off the egg, picked it up, and walked over to the table, where he proceeded to crack it open.
"Wait." Weiss said while searching her bag. We were about to ask what she wanted but realized why she stopped everyone when she pulled out two large glasses. "Here. Put the antidote into this."
'Thanks.' Courage said as he poured the contents of the egg into the glasses. He then gave one to Muriel while Weiss gave the other to Penny.
SOOTH OURSELVES
"There's that mysterious choir again." Blake said, trying to find where the people who were just singing were.
"How do you feel, Muriel?" I asked, sitting next to her.
"I can breathe. I feel myself again." She answered.
'YAY!' Courage cheered.
"How about you, Penny?" Ruby asked.
"Much better. Thank you, everyone." She answered as Ruby helped her up.
"NOW FREE US!" The slugs chanted.
"Okay. Now, which spell can we use to free them?" I asked as Courage, and I flipped through the pages. However, we stopped when we heard Big Bayou's voice.
"What the BAYOU's going on here?" He asked with a hiss. "Were you two messing with my Bayou magic?"
'Crap. How do we get out of this?' I wondered.
"Hand it over, and I'll make sure you all work as my slaves forever."
"You have to catch us first?" Ruby said, using her semblance to rush over to us, grab the book, and run out of the cave. Not wasting a second, Courage and I chased after her.
"GET BACK HERE WITH MY BOOK!" Big Bayou demanded before chasing us. "Oh, you get it now, children. You get it now."
"WHERE SHOULD WE GO?" Ruby asked, slowing down to match our speed.
"In the water. We might be able to lose him on the other side." I answered as we entered the lake.
"Maybe we could use a spell in this book to stop Big Bayou."
'I think I saw a spell that could help.' Courage said, taking the book from Ruby and opening it to the correct page. 'Here it is.'
"That could work." Ruby said when she saw that the spell Courage was talking about could make the snake statues our servants.
"But how do we perform the spell, or is it a ritual?" I asked.
'To make stuffed bayou snakes, your obedient servants, use deadly venom from a real bayou snake.'
"Great. And how are we going to do that?" I asked, annoyed. However, fate seemed to hate or like us at the moment as Big Bayou suddenly appeared in front of us.
"AS WE SAY IN THE BAYOU! BY YOU!" He said, baring his fangs.
"WATCH OUT!" I shouted, pushing Courage and Ruby to the side before using the book to block Big Bayou's attack.
"What the bayou?" Big Bayou asked, confused, before shaking his head to try and free his fangs from the book.
"Jaune. The venom." Ruby said, pointing to the snake statues and how they were coming to life from the venom.
'OH, NO!' Courage said after the book hit his head, making us realize that Big Bayou freed his fangs. He then quickly got onto a stump and waved toward the snake statues. "Servent snakes, obey."
"Cool." Ruby and I said, seeing how the snakes stood at attention to Courage's command.
'GO GET HIM!' Courage ordered.
"NO!" Big Bayou shouted, terrified as the snake statues moved toward him. "HEY! YOU ALL... ARE ME! I CAN'T DO THIS!"
'WHEW!' Courage said, relieved.
"That was too close." Ruby said, grabbing the book.
"Everyone. Come here." We heard Muriel shout. We turned to the shore and saw Muriel and the others waving at us. Swimming over to them, we noticed Muriel holding a damaged nail file. "I need a new file. But we got the slugs free."
"They are our big bayou heroes." The young slug said.
"Where's Big Bayou?" The lead slug asked.
"Oh, he won't be bothering you for a long time." I assured.
"Alright. Now that Penny and Muriel are better, can we go home now as we run out of bug spray?" Blake said, swatting at a fly that landed on her arm.
"Sure."
Next Day
"Ahh, it sure is lovely to sip tea just for the pleasure of it." Muriel said, smiling.
"It sure is." Penny agreed before taking another sip of her tea.
"What did you do with the book?" Yang asked as she and the other ate the breakfast we made.
"We destroyed it after having the computer scan its pages." I answered.
"That's good. The last thing we need is for a book of magic to get into the wrong hands." Weiss said, taking a sip of her tea.
"I wonder what the snake puppets did to Big Bayou?" Blake asked, curious. But before anyone could answer, Eustace barged into the room.
"AHHH! MURIEL! I CAUGHT YOUR DURN COLD!" He said before sneezing. But it wasn't an ordinary sneeze as it was the uncommon cold sent by Big Bayou this time.
"HELP!" He shouted, severely injured and locked in shackles.
"Yang." I said, pointing to Courage, performing the ritual to get the cure.
"Right." She said before covering Penny and Ruby's eyes.
'HA, HA, HA!' Courage laughed before laying the egg.
Notes:
Next Chapters: (1) Profiles in Courage with Ruby, Taiyang and Adrian. (2) Muriel blows up with Saphron, Terra, Adrian, and Winter. (3) Mother's Day with only Jaune and Muriel. (4) Perfect with Glynda, Winter, Team Jnpr, and Team Rwby. (5) Remembrance of Courage's Past with Team Rwby, Team Jnpr, and Cinder. (6) Wedding Chapter. (8) Epilogue.