AN: Small date mistake in the last chapter which has now been corrected. Still in June with this main storyline. But I assure you some longer time jumps are coming soon. There's just a lot I want to write still.

Also - something weird is up with the reviews again. I can see the number of them increase but they're not showing up on the site and I only got a notification about one (from Lucy). It makes me so sad, not to see them...I would LOVE it if you shot me a PM if there were any scene requests at least. Sometimes these things show up later, sometimes they don't at all.

Thank you so much for thinking along (and reviewing) with me on this story! You have had enourmous patience with me and my multitude of storylines. I can already picture the wedding scenes to take up a lot of chapters because of everything I want to put in it. Can't wait.

And Happy Midsommer to those who celebrate it!

Chapter 196

May 1st, 2005

"I hate these people!" Lorelai exclaimed in disbelief, having just heard Rory tell her over the phone how Logan's family had treated her at dinner that night.

"It was awful," Rory sighed, sounding discouraged. She'd gotten dressed in her very best, she'd kept up an intelligent conversation - but she hadn't been good enough for them. She almost couldn't believe it.

"Well, Logan didn't just sit there and let them attack you all night, did he?" Lorelai asked, soudning a little accusatory.

"No. He got really mad and he told them they were all crazy, and then we left," she explained what had happened.

"Well, good for him!" Lorelai agreed, but Rory could tell she was just on the verge of giving her more of her 'opinion'. She knew she didn't think too highly of Logan, but for now she was pretty sure it was all because she just didn't really know him.

"But we didn't say a word to each other all the way home. And then walking back to my dorm, he just looked so freaked… I could tell that he was just….I don't know, rethinking everything… the whole relationship. I'm just afraid he's going to bolt," Rory explained, worriedly. God, she felt like crying almost.

For a moment there was just silence on the other end of the phone, Lorelai holding herself back.

"Mom?" she asked.

"Can I say something? Something you may not want to hear?" Lorelai asked, about to say it anyways. With her daughter she knew she could be without a filter - it had always been like that unless she specifically told her not to. She'd already hated that Rory hadn't wanted to hear her when she'd been home to announce that Logan and her were boyfriend and girlfriend. And this had just happened, this was certainly a follow up to either of those things, and this was the sole reason she was even asking.

"Yes," Rory sighed, reluctantly. If she truly hadn't wanted her opinion she wouldn't have called.

"If he is going to bolt, maybe you should let him bolt," Lorelai said. Neither believed it was easy for Lorelai to tell her this. "He told you, Rory... He told you he was not a commitment kind of guy, just like you're not a non-commitment kind of girl," she continued to explain. Secretly Lorelai loved that she had been right about the fact from the start. "And you tried to be something you weren't - and it was bad. It didn't work for you. Don't try and force him to be something he's not," Lorelai added, suggesting. She believed she knew best what worked for her daughter and what did not. It was a mother's job to offer that advice to a child, was it not?

"I didn't force him!" Rory argued, feeling like Lorelai was talking about things way broader context than she'd wanted her opinion on. It was no secret to her that her mother didn't like Logan much.

"I know, but he was looking at losing you, and he didn't want to and I give him credit for that. But maybe in the end this is not the guy or the relationship for you," Lorelai explained. She just felt like Logan was the guy who wasn't used to admitting his defeat or the fact that he might lose something he liked - in this case Rory - and that was why he was in this relationship in the first place.

"I don't care what his family thinks," Rory defended the situation.

"This has nothing to do with his family," Lorelai added, though she knew it was pretty borderline. She knew well that a society's family's influence didn't usually end there. She could imagine things going really badly if they hated her that much. She'd heard of 'all means necessary' before when someone dated someone unsuitable.

"We're good together, Mom! I'm good for him!" Rory argued, a little naively. But she knew this to be the truth.

"But maybe he isn't good for you," Lorelai tried to offer Rory her perspective.

Rory wanted to argue, that he was - that he pushed her like no-one else had, whether this mean going out to have fun or jumping off a scaffolding or just the way he made her feel when they slept together. But she wasn't about to go into details.

"People can change!" Rory continued, but could already tell she'd used the wrong words. She was so much better in writing.

"Do you really want to be in the business of changing someone?" Lorelai asked, but she knew well enough that she'd tried that herself a bunch of times.

This was bordeline demagogy, Rory could tell.

"Maybe he wants to change!" Rory argued, still not quite through with her side of the argument, despite her mother's words.

"Rory, two days ago you were on the bathroom floor crying about why he won't call you. Why doesn't he like you, what did you do?" Lorelai shot back, almost feeling like she was playing dirty herself, picking the most colorful examples.

"I was drunk. I was sick!" Rory defended herself, really hating that her mother had brought that up. It truly hadn't been her best moment, and she wasn't proud of ever having sounded so desperate. But she felt she didn't deserved to be critisized for letting loose that one time. It was embarrasing to say the least.

"You, my beautiful, brainy,...," Lorelai began, but Rory nearly zoned out from her lecture. She didn't like when her mother did this - go on about her being something perfect, essentially putting her on a pedestal. "Is that really the kind of relationship you want to be in?" she added, and that finally Rory heard, not liking her opinion on all of this. She almost felt like she didn't want to discuss anything Logan-related with her in the future, but she lacked an alternative just the same.

Thankfully, the next minute here was a knock on the door, bringing Rory out of the hole she felt she'd been cornered into a minute ago. But it was this time it truly became clear to Rory how her mother thought about Logan and their relationship.

June 24th, 2022

"So what's up kid? You look kind of down," Lorelai asked, after Friday night dinner over at the Crap Shack.

It was her, Em, Luke and Lorelai that evening, and she'd already heard how things were finally beginning to move towards the normal in the Gilmore-Danes household. Luke had actually slept over a few nights last week, and it was safe to say Lorelai was very hopeful.

Throughout the dinner they'd just talked about baby gear shopping, Lorelai being eager to get them something beyond cute outfits, the wedding and Em's summer plans - a big trip to California with Jess being in the plans. It was not really easy to talk about anything serious with Em at the table, the girl having become a real chatter-box in the past few months. But now Em had taken her dessert to living room accompanied by Luke. Rory could tell Em missed Luke, as he still didn't entirely trust himself to resume all of their usual activities - but this was better than nothing for sure.

Rory dug her spoon into the ice cream bucket - chocolate chip - in front of her, delaying her response.

"Come on, you can talk to me," Lorelai encouraged, pleadingly after swallowing a mouthful of ice cream, nearly getting a brainfreeze.

Rory cast her a look, which Lorelai interpreted more quickly, and more severly, than she'd expected.

"What did he do?" she asked, nearly expecting the worst.

Rory wanted to shoot back that Logan hadn't done anything because of the way she'd said it. But it was just the severity of the deed that she could argue with.

"He's been great, exemplary even," Rory began with a praise. Logan was taking really good care of her, while also making sure she wasn't going crazy being at home more these days. He entertained Em, took all of them to the movies, museums and swimming. He invited them along for walks. He went to prenatal classes with Rory and at least with a toy-baby they used in those classes he was already very capable. He was up on the wedding plans and had done his best limiting the number of distant family and friends that needed to be at the wedding. Naturally - he had his own challenges as well and even though he hadn't really looked the wolf in the eyes in the case of his mother's finances, he was doing pretty well considering the weight he'd taken on. He was supportive, loving, very attentive in bed… what more could she want? But it was for that reason she felt silly even being bothered by this.

"But…?" Lorelai didn't quite believe her daughter.

"There is something…," Rory began. "But honestly I don't want to tell you because it's like you're waiting for him to screw up," she blurted in all honesty, sticking her spoon into the ice cream with force so it stood up.

This week they'd taken separate cars to Birdie's because Logan was coming from the HPG's Manhattan office, having been over for an announcement about his return with the board that day. His meeting had run late and the traffic had sucked, so she'd ended up doing the first half of the session by herself, talking about her relationship with her mother, not feeling like talking about Logan behind his back.

"What? Where did that come from?" Lorelai exclaimed in shock.

"Oh come on, you know it's true," Rory replied, keeping her voice down a little, despite being fairly sure their voices wouldn't travel over Boss Baby.

"Well.. I may have my reservations. He doesn't exactly have a stellar track record. But I don't want him to screw up. I don't want anything to happen that can hurt you and your kids," Lorelai explained with a shrug of her shoulders, putting her arms across her chest, defensively, not feeling like she should be apologizing for being more cautious than her.

"Oh just like you're not accusing him because I decided to not go back to Chilton," Rory snorted.

"Hey, I haven't said a word," she defended herself.

"But I can tell," Rory argued. "'As long as your entire purpose won't become sitting on committees and running charities', right?" Rory quoted her mother.

The phrase had influenced her more than she'd realized and this was definitely something Birdie had helped her understand. There were others too, some Logan related and some work-related - 'at least you're not still at the D.A.R' like she'd said when she'd returned to Yale after their fight and she'd gotten that job at the Stamford Eagle Gazette, or the time when when she'd commented disappointedly 'are you sure you want to just fend for yourself out there?' when she'd switched from working for Hugo to freelancing, despite being sick of being on the road and doing stories on most popular whatever and census data summaries. Sure, she'd been right about the latter not being the best idea in the long run - but it was the doubt that her opinion sowed in her that was the problem.

"That was a joke," Lorelai replied.

"Well - call me sensitive or flaky, I don't care. But you should know what words hurt," Rory huffed, reminding herself to keep her tone down. "I may not be doing what I, we, used to dream about, but I think you and I both realize how disillusioned that was. I'm not great under stress, so clearly I was never going to be Christiane Amanpour," Rory exhaled. "And as it turns out I am not up for being a teacher for the rest of my life either, I don't want to be grading papers at 1 AM or feel exhausted every single night. And sure - it must be a big disappointment that I'm such a failure to you after all you went through to put me through Chilton, and for that I am sorry. But the truth is that I'm 37 years old and still figuring things out," Rory lectured.

"Rory…," Lorelai sighed, not knowing what else to say. This was hard to hear.

"Just leave it… I don't need a response. I just need you to accept whatever it is that I'm going to do, and not treat my next failure... or any course really... like I'm ungrateful, spoiled or want to spend my life doing nothing meaningful," Rory said.

"Okay..," Lorelai exhaled, still almost entirely speechless.

They both took a few spoonfuls of ice cream, having lost at least half of their appetite. Neither said a word.

"But what did Logan do?" Lorelai asked, hesitantly, almost expecting another scolding. She was not used to being spoken to like that by her daughter. She was unsure how to take it - was it pregnancy hormones or really something that had piled up over the years and hurt her?

"If I tell you, I just don't want you to say anything. Nothing - not even make a face or smile or 'I told you so'… I just… I don't want that kind of pressure," Rory blurted, needing her to promise.

"I promise! Now tell me," Lorelai assured, demandingly.

"He sent the story I have about grandma to a publishist. Anonymously. Basically saying it was something he found somewhere random and just asked for their opinion. He told me he was going to do it and I tentatively agreed. But then he just went ahead and sent it before the interview came out without telling me. And well…. I don't know. I don't know if this is going to be something or not, but whatever it is I'm taking a meeting about it on Monday and we'll see. I don't want to jinx it, I don't want to get my hopes up," Rory blabbered, and stood from her seat, and headed over to Em and Luke to watch the end of the movie with them, not even wanting to see her mother's expression as a response.