I returned to Bucky after ordering pizza. "Find anything else?" I asked lightly.

"Does Stark know what's in these files?"

His answer seemed odd, but I shrugged it off. "Most likely. I didn't exactly get these from him."

Bucky glanced at me, some unknown expression on his face.

"What is it? What's wrong?"

"There are videos… probably best if you watch."

I hesitated before making my way to the table. Bucky stood so I could take the chair. He pressed play after I sat down. I reached over to turn the sound up.

"Don't," he warned as his hand whipped out to stop me.

I frowned and watched. The chair I was strapped in was familiar but not the large machine spinning slowly around my head. Pierce was there, he seemed to be saying something. I watched as I replied immediately, then spat at him. He ignored what I guessed was a strongly worded insult.

As Pierce continued to speak, I grew still, no longer straining against the bonds. I recognized the look on my face. The look I'd seen on Bucky's face when he was the winter soldier. My hands went cold.

"How…"

"They… injected you with the serum before killing you. When you burned and came back, well apparently the activation code started working."

I started shaking. "I don't remember."

"I didn't remember the first few times either. It was a long time before I…" he went quiet as another video popped up.

I was laying on some sort of metal table, a person in a white lab coat standing over me. I didn't remember this from my captivity.

Once again, I reached over the laptop to turn the sound on. Bucky started to protest.

"You can turn it off if something starts to happen." We both knew what that something was, but I didn't want to acknowledge it.

"It's been 48 hours since the subject was injected with the serum. Extracting marrow." The doctor pushed a large needle into my leg. As a scream resounded from the video, I heard Bucky take a deep breath. I glanced at him and was shocked at the anger showing on his face.

I paused the video quickly. "I don't remember this," I said quietly. Bucky narrowed his eyes.

"You probably blocked it out."

"I've lived a very long time; this isn't even close to the worst thing to happen to me. I wouldn't have blocked it out."

"Pierce wanted you to forget something then," he stated.

"Well, if I'm a sleeper then I shouldn't be the one to review these," I spoke slowly as I thought aloud.

"That's probably what Stark was thinking."

I frowned. "Tony would've said something. He doesn't like it, but I do have higher clearance than him. I assume it's an order from Fury himself, for Stark to keep this private."

We glanced at each other unsure. I couldn't stop the torrent of thoughts running through my head. Why hadn't Tony said anything? We kept secrets from each other on the team sometimes but never like this. Even if Fury had ordered him to stay silent, Tony wasn't the type to blindly obey. A knock on the door startled me. Bucky handled the interaction before bringing the box to the table.

We started eating silently. I wondered what Bucky was thinking. He would be the only person who could understand my feelings. But I wasn't ready to deal with them yet.

"Do you want to stay here tonight?" Bucky broke the silence. I glanced at him. I longed for my bed but wasn't sure if the team would like Bucky spending so much time away from the tower. I gave it a few more seconds of thought.

"Yes, I would love to spend a night in my bed. My couch has a pullout. I've got extra blankets in the closet I keep clean for the others when they stay."

Bucky nodded. "I would like to spend some time away from the tower."

I smiled. Then closed the laptop and put it away. I was tired already and extremely sore. The pain from my ribs would be unbearable before too long. I wished I'd remembered to grab some medicine.

"You can take a nap," Bucky offered. I wondered how he seemed to know what I was thinking. "There's nothing else to do and I'm sure you're not feeling well."

I nodded, "I shouldn't have flown us both over here." He was kind enough to spare me the 'I told you so'. I dragged myself to my room, climbed on my bed, and promptly fell asleep.