Let's not talk about how long it's been *innocent whistle*. Just get straight in to another chapter of these dumbasses.
-HTTYD-
Astrid pulled back after a minute, her head spinning. Eret looked as shocked as she felt, and when she turned toward the door, Hiccup was standing there with Henry in his arms, wide-eyed.
"Uh..."
Hiccup said, but Astrid knew she could not deal with them just then.
"I need to go. Heather and Cami are on their way over, and..."
"Astrid-"
Eret started, but Astrid shook her head and cut him off.
"Please. Just... I need space."
He frowned, but eventually nodded and stepped back from her.
"Alright. But... don't disappear on us again. Please?"
Astrid swallowed, nodding. Disappearing sounded kind of appealing, but even if she really wanted to... she couldn't do that to them. Or Henry. Eret headed over to give Henry a kiss and cuddle goodbye, and Hiccup did the same before he put the boy down, Henry trotted over to Astrid and put his arms up, uncaring of whatever tension was happening between the grown ups. She leant down and scooped him up, unable to help but smile at the happy little boy.
"Wanna go see Heather and Cami?"
"Yeah! Byeeee!"
He turned to wave at Hiccup and Eret, then wrapped his arms tight around Astrid's neck to let her carry him off. Her mind was still racing, and the twins' gazes were heavy on her back as she left. Henry thankfully behaved all the way to getting buckled in to his car seat, and babbled away happily to her about his weekend with Eret and Hiccup as she drove back home. He was a balm on her frayed nerves, continuing to cheer her up all the way back.
Henry wanted to put his nuvttohat on when they got back, so Astrid helped him take off his normal shoes and slippers. He was delighted to have the cosy slippers back on, and after a few more snuggles from Astrid, he headed to his toys to get busy playing. Of course, then he wanted a feed just before the door knocked. Luckily, Cami was not the sort to wait patiently and it meant Astrid could confirm who was there.
"Hey, let us in!"
Yep. Definitely Cami.
"Use your key!"
She yelled back, and heard a metallic jingle before the front door opened, admitting the two women in to her living room. Heather made an "ahhh" sound of understanding when she saw Astrid sat on the sofa with Henry latched on. Cami barely glanced over before she headed to the kitchen with the food they'd brought along. Astrid had offered to cook, but Heather apparently still wanted to make sure Astrid was eating things not in the "whatever's quick because Henry's destroying the living room" food group.
Even the arrival of new people did not distract Henry from his feed, but as soon as he'd finished he was racing over to say hello to Heather - leaving Astrid exposed briefly, but it wasn't exactly a new sight for either Heather or Cami, and she'd readjusted quickly enough. At least it wasn't like the time he'd yanked her shirt down in front of Hiccup and Eret...
The thought of them made Astrid's stomach twist. Gods, that had actually happened. And while she'd defijnitely been wanting that, Astrid had not expected it, and now she knew that she was going to have to deal with the aftermath. And since she'd been unable to help herself and kissed Eret back, she had the feeling just saying "forget it" wasn't really an option.
"Are you alright?"
Heather asked after a minute, and Astrid assumed her thoughts and feelings had shown on her face. She put Henry down and he toddled over to his toys again, entertaining himself. Astrid shrugged, then sighed and glanced over to the kitchen door. Cami knew there was a difficult situation with Henry's father, but that didn't necessarily mean Astrid was comfortable outright discussing it with Cami there. Heather gave a nod of understanding, then sat down and squeezed Astrid in a one armed hug.
"I'll call you in the morning after Cami goes to work if you need to talk?"
Astrid nodded in agreement, then heard Cami swear colourfully from the kitchen. Heather rolled her eyes, then let out a short laugh as she got up and went in search of the cause. Thankfully, Henry didn't seem to have been listening, so Astrid hoped not to hear him repeating the expletives. She had enough trouble keeping her own bad language out of his vocabulary.
"It's ok. She just stood on a giraffe."
"I swear he hasn't been in the kitchen since he got back, and I cleaned up yesterday!"
That was the truth, but so was the fact childrens toys seemed to multiply and get everywhere when nobody was looking.
"Wait, how did it hurt? Why did you have your shoes off in the kitchen?"
Cami grumbled.
"I'm short, okay! I was polite enough to remove my shoes before climbing up on the counter, and for my troubles I was attacked by a giraffe!"
Both Astrid and Heather were laughing too much to show any sympathy to Cami's plight, but she seemed unable to hold much of a grudge and there was a smile fighting its way on to her face.
"Well, now you'll know in future to check for wildlife in the kitchen."
Cami rolled her eyes, then turned and bounced back through the door. Astrid continued to chuckle about the tiny woman's antics, then went back to watching Henry play. Heather offered to make her a coffee, which Astrid gratefully accepted. She heard the two women chatting in the kitchen as she watched Henry stack his blocks, then use the nearest toy creature to knock them back down. He seemed delighted by his little game, as he burst into fits of joyful laughter each time the tower came crashing down. Astrid had watched him build and destroy two block towers by the time Heather returned, placing a steaming mug down on the table.
"Decaf, I know you prefer to save your one cup of caffeine for emergencies."
Astrid nodded and thanked her, still watching Henry.
"What is Cami doing to my kitchen?"
She asked, noticing the lack of girlfriend Heather had definitely brought with her.
"She's just reheating food. At worst, broken plate or bowl. She hasn't blown up my microwave yet."
"Heard that!"
Cami's voice rang out from the kitchen, at which Heather snorted before shouting back to her.
"Love you too!"
They sat watching Henry in companionable silence for a little while longer, then Cami called out for help transporting food in to the living room. Heather got up to go help. As they knew Henry had already nursed, they only brought a small bowlful through for him, so Astrid set him up next to her on the sofa once she'd laid a towel down, in a probably-fruitless attempt to avoid him getting food everywhere.
The pasta bake was delicious, and as much as Astrid complained about her friends putting themselves out for her, she did genuinely appreciate that they wanted to look out for her, even if her innate independence rebelled against the notion sometimes. Heather had stuck with her through things nobody would be expected to tolerate, and while Astrid couldn't say she'd been completely judgement free, especially at first, she'd ultimately just been an incredible and supportive friend.
Cami had just finished inhaling her own portion of pasta when she frowned, fumbling with her pockets before pulling out her vibrating phone. She answered the call, and Astrid got the gist of what was said by Cami's answer of "I'm on my way". She hung up and stood up.
"Car crash pile up, all hands on deck situation. I'll leave the car here and get a taxi, I'm probably gonna be too wiped to drive home tonight. Sorry to rush out on you."
"Don't be silly."
Astrid responded, and Heather nodded her agreement.
"I knew what I was signing up for by dating a nurse. Go do your thing love."
She hugged Astrid, kissed Henry on top of his head and then kissed Heather goodbye, already on her way out as soon as she'd gotten a local taxi number from Astrid. Henry gave her a little wave with his sauce-covered hand, yelling "bye!" after her, and they heard a laugh from her before the door closed.
Astrid chewed her last few bites of pasta, well aware of Heather's eyes wandering over to her a few times. They were technically alone now, so Astrid had no reason not to talk about what had happened earlier. Though Heather was obviously thinking the same thing, she didn't immediately leap on Astrid to start talking, which she appreciated. Once she'd finished eating, Astrid turned to focus on cleaning up Henry, who had pasta sauce all over his face, hands and clothes, but only one single stray piece of pasta had gotten past the towel to land on the floor. A true success in feeding a toddler, Astrid chuckled to herself as she stripped his soiled clothes off and wiped his face and hands, then re-dressed him.
Heather had already washed up by the time Astrid was done, and refilled both their coffee cups so they had fresh hot drinks to enjoy. Fed and changed, Henry was ready for a nap, though he insisted on extra kisses and cuddles from Astrid before he was willing to go down properly. She gave them, smiling at his sweet little face when he curled up, hand clutching the blanket Valka had made for him.
Once she'd enjoyed gazing upon her son for a few minutes, Astrid drew in a deep breath, bracing herself before she headed back out to a waiting Heather. Truth be told, she wanted to talk about it, to get it out of her head where it was just swirling around.
"So, what did you need to talk about?"
Heather asked once Astrid had sat back down and taken a sip of coffee. Astrid chewed her lip, image still fresh in her mind.
"Eret kissed me. And Hiccup saw it."
Heather's eyes went wide briefly, but then she hummed and nodded.
"About damn time."
"What?"
"I told you! I've seen them look at you, those boys are pining just like you, but you were too scared to believe me. Now they've made it pretty damn clear."
Astrid rolled her eyes.
"A kiss doesn't mean anything like that."
"Sure. They've just bent over backwards to make you comfortable while still getting to see their son. They haven't dated anybody else, and neither have you. They just look at you with sad eyes and then, oh look, one of them kissed you! Gee, what a mystery."
Heather's voice dripped with sarcasm. Astrid glared.
"A kiss doesn't mean they... love me."
"You really are so dense. I saw them when you disappeared before. They were frantic! I haven't bugged you about it because I know how tough this has all been for you, but seriously? How many more hints do you need before you realise that they want you back, just the same as you want them back?"
Astrid scrubbed her hands over her face.
"I... I'm not sure I can put myself out like that. What if you're wrong? I'll never be able to look at them again, and I can't do that to Henry."
"I will personally volunteer to be your mediator and take him to his weekend visits if I'm wrong. But come on, you know I'm right. You're just scared to face what that will mean."
Astrid sighed. Heather was right. If... if they did want her back, and Astrid wanted them, then... what? They'd be a three-person relationship? Drawing more attention to a relationship that was already wrong to most - Astrid had not forgotten they were her brothers. If anything happened, then it was no small thing. It would be serious from the start. And if things fell apart again, the fallout would be even bigger now they were a part of Henry's life.
"I am. I mean, Cami doesn't even know. She doesn't, right?"
She glanced sideways at Heather.
"Of course not! Well, I've never told her."
"Meaning?"
"I mean I have never said a word to her about the fact those two are brothers, your brothers. But if she's ever spotted your tattoo and realised it's the same as Eret's, then I credit her with the intelligence to put two and two together. Although saying that, I do not credit her with the necessary filter between her brain and her mouth to stop her from asking me if she had clicked. So no, I don't think she knows."
Astrid couldn't help laughing. Cami was definitely want to say whatever was on her mind, regardless of whether or not it was appropriate.
"How does she work as a nurse?"
Heather grinned.
"With great difficulty. She uses up any filter she has at work, so we get the unfiltered Cami."
They lapsed in to a brief silence, sipping coffee and thinking before Heather refused to let Astrid avoid the topic (again) any longer.
"So, what are you going to do? Other than the twins."
"Heather!"
She grinned, utterly unapologetic about her innuendo.
"What? I know they're good!"
Astrid buried her face in her hands, shaking her head.
"Shut up."
She mumbled, keen to not have her mind wander down that route. Those memories were not the way to make a calm, well thought out decision. Heather continued to chortle next to her, then prodded Astrid in the arm.
"I'm serious. What are you going to do?"
Astrid slumped back against the sofa, wondering if she was going to set a world record for most dramatic sighs in a day as she sighed again.
"I don't know. I need to think, really."
"That's fair. Not a decision to take lightly. But I'm on team 'they love you, idiot', for the record."
Heather answered, settling back more sedately to finish her coffee. Astrid stared at the ceiling for a couple of minutes, thoughts turning over.
"I'm in no rush to get back, Cami won't be home for hours now. So... take your time."
Heather eventually said after the silence stretched a bit too long for her comfort, and Astrid appreciated the sentiment and patience in her friend's words. She mused quietly for a while longer, barely remembering to finish her coffee before it got cold. Not that cold coffees were uncommon when she was a single mother to a toddler.
Although...
"I'm scared."
"I know. Tell me why."
"If you know, why do I need to tell you?"
Astrid grumbled.
"Because you need to admit it to yourself."
Heather answered sagely, looking like she had all the time in the world for Astrid's complicated life.
"I love them. But... they are my brothers. That's always going to be true. How do we deal with that, especially with Hen? Do I tell him? Can I hide it from him? What happens if we don't work out? Then it's even more complicated."
Heather nodded, choosing an answer.
"All valid concerns. But what if it does work out? What if all three of you can be together, and happy? Yeah, it's complicated, but the brother thing is a bit of a moot point when you guys have a kid together. Nobody but me and your parents know about that anyway. And as for Henry... you probably don't need to tell him, but that's up to you when he's older. Plus, think how much he'd love to be able to see all three of you all the time!"
Astrid bit her lip, those images she'd pushed away for so long of the three of them together flooding her mind. The three of them, raising Henry and maybe having more children, a family together... she felt a little choked up.
"Yeah..."
Gods, she felt almost overwhelmed just thinking about it. Heather reached out and squeezed her arm, offering comfort without fully invading her space when she knew Astrid was obviously feeling quite emotional.
"But if you don't think it's what will be right for you and Henry, then don't feel guilted in to it. I'm sure they'd understand if you weren't up to it."
"I know they would."
Astrid answered softly. Her head was starting to ache, the onslaught of thoughts and feelings leaving her feeling a little drained.
"I need a lie down."
"Go on then. I'll stay and watch Henry if he wakes up."
Immensely grateful, Astrid got up and headed to her room, moving around quietly so she didn't wake her son from his nap. She curled up in bed, and was unable to stop herself remembering all the times she'd been sandwiched between them, warm and safe...
A few tears soaked in to her pillow, but Astrid managed to keep from actually crying. She missed those feelings, and gods only knew how she'd wished to have that feeling every day. Ever since that morning she'd woken up with the certainty she never wanted to be anywhere else. That certainty that had scared the life out of her, because they never wanted that kind of commitment...
Was she even sure they did now?
Yes, her mind nudged. Hiccup and Eret were living as a couple, and not dating or having sex with others any longer. The idea of it just being sex for them was obviously long gone, and in her heart Astrid knew that they wouldn't just be looking to bed her again now. Not with Henry there, pushing them all to be much more mature and adult about things.
The real question was whether Astrid was prepared to take those risks. The risk of being found out, and the risk of getting her heart broken again. She curled up tighter in her quilt, and as complicated as everything felt earlier, her mind seemed to settle on the answer pretty quickly.
Yes.
-HTTYD-
This was like... 1/3rd written for ages, and then suddenly I blitzed it out in one day after writers block disappeared. Hope we keep this energy!