*JENNIE
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"Jen." The second I hear Kai's voice behind me my entire body tenses.
It's been three weeks since our last altercation—the one that resulted in me becoming Lisa's girlfriend. And while that day ended way better than it started, that doesn't mean I'm in any rush to go another round with my ex.
"What do you want, Kai?" I sigh, shutting my locker before turning toward him.
He's standing just a couple feet to my right, hands shoved in the pockets of his jeans. Normally I might have swooned a little bit at the sight of him; Kai has always been good looking, but the face that once made my heart beat faster now only makes my stomach turn.
I guess having things put into perspective will do that for you. He may be attractive, but that's where his pleasantries end. And he has nothing on Lisa, who always looks like she just stepped out of a magazine.
"I was hoping we could talk." His voice is soft, hesitant even, and it instantly causes a nervous knot to form in the pit of my stomach.
"About?" I go for annoyance.
I mean, I am annoyed. Annoyed that he can't just go away and leave me in peace. Annoyed that he waited until I was interested in someone else before even offering a semblance of an apology—which was ruined when he continued to speak. Annoyed that he thinks I owe him anything after everything he put me through.
"Us." He says it like it should be obvious.
A weird cackle escapes my throat, and I look at Kai for a long moment, slinging my book bag over my shoulder.
"There is no us, Kai. Or did you forget that now that Taylor isn't up your ass?" Even I'm shocked by how smooth the statement leaves my mouth. Normally I'd stutter and stammer, my nerves getting the better of me.
Not anymore… I'm done letting this asshole walk all over me.
Jen—one. Kai—zero.
Damn, I like this.
"Come on. Don't be like that." He wastes no time coming after me when I push past him down the hallway, heading for the exit.
"Be like what, Kai?" I spit, keeping my gaze focused ahead. "Don't stand up for myself. Don't hold a grudge when you completely screwed me over and made me look an idiot. What exactly don't you want me to be like, Kai? Huh? Tell me because I sure as hell would like to know," I hammer out, not stopping until I've pushed my way outside, Kai right on my heels.
"Jen." He abruptly stops as soon as we reach the parking lot and for whatever reason I find myself stopping with him. "I'm sorry, okay." His gaze drops to the ground the moment I turn toward him.
"You're sorry?" The question is riddled with attitude, but I can feel my anger waning. I've never been one to stay mad at people.
"I fucked up, Jen. I fucked up bad." He takes a step toward me and then another, closing the distance between us. "I miss you."
When he reaches for me I take a full step back, holding my hand out between us.
"You should have thought about that, Kai." I stand my ground. "I'm with Lisa now. And even if I wasn't, there's no way I'd ever take you back."
"She's just going to hurt you," he threatens.
"Like you did?" I snarl. "She wouldn't do that."
"How the fuck do you know? Just because she's whispering sweet nothings into your ear doesn't mean she doesn't have a hidden agenda. Come on, Jen, open your fucking eyes. She's using you."
"Go fuck yourself, Kai." I spin back around, done with this whole situation.
I'm so mad that when his hand wraps around my forearm seconds later preventing me from walking away, I have to physically restrain myself from swinging around and hitting him.
"Why the fuck are you so quick to pass judgment on me, and yet you won't even look at all the shit she's pulled?"
"Because she's never hurt me," I grind out, ripping my arm away. "My answer is no, Kai. I'm not going to give you a second chance. I'm not interested in hearing any more of your half-assed apologies. I'm done. Do you hear me? Done!" I practically scream in his face.
"You fucking bitch. You think she's so different, do you? Just wait. It's gonna be an epic fucking show when you finally realize what everyone else already knows—she's only with you to fuck you."
"Why do you even care?" I can't control the tremble in my voice. "My life doesn't concern you anymore. Leave me alone, Kai. For the last time, just leave me alone."
He's pushing me toward my breaking point, and the look on his face tells me he knows exactly what he's doing. And what's worse—he's enjoying watching me come unraveled.
"You're such a fucking…" It's all he gets out before a fist comes out of nowhere connecting with Kai's jaw, causing his head to snap back.
He falls to the ground, his eyes wide in surprise. It all happens so quickly I barely have time to process any of it.
Lisa is on top of Kai in a second, punching him so hard that blood instantly spurts from Kai's nose and mouth, staining the concrete below him. He tries to fight back, but Lisa is too quick, and Kai's efforts are pointless.
I open my mouth, try to tell Lisa to stop, but I'm not entirely sure any words come out. I can feel eyes on us everywhere, but I can't seem to make myself move.
Do something, Jen!
"Lisa." I finally find my voice, gripping her shoulder in an effort to pull her off of Kai.
"You motherfucker," she seethes, laying another hard blow to the side of Kai's face.
"Lisa." I try again, her entire body tensing this time. She freezes with her fist still extended in the air. "Please stop."
Her face turns toward me, the rage in her eyes softening the moment she registers my face.
"Stop." I mouth.
She looks at me for another long moment and then looks back down at Kai who's holding his nose, trying to control the blood pouring from it.
At first, I think she might hit him again, but instead, she leans down—her voice so low I have to strain to hear it.
"If you even so much as look at Jen again I will fucking kill you. Do you understand me?" She waits until Kai nods furiously before climbing off him, but the action is too late.
Teachers swarm our position, one swooping down to help Kai while two others back Lisa away, telling her to calm down.
I look back and forth between the two of them, wondering how in the hell something so small turned into something this big. Kai just wanted to talk. I should've just said no and walked away. Instead, I stood there and let him get me riled up. I should've known he'd intentionally push my buttons.
Then again, I never expected Lisa to see the altercation, let alone jump in and do something about it. I watch helplessly as the two teachers lead Lisa back into the school; if I had to guess I'd say she's headed straight for the principal's office. She doesn't look at me even once, disappearing inside seconds later with her head tilted toward the ground.
Kai is helped to his feet and ushered inside after her; they'll no doubt take him to the nurse first. His face looks like someone stomped on it with a big combat boot over and over again.
My stomach twists violently as the events seem to catch up with me, and if it weren't for Rosé showing up just at the right moment, I might have lost the contents of my stomach all over the school's parking lot.
"Are you okay?" She immediately pulls me into her arms.
"You saw?" I tremble in her embrace, the adrenaline pumping through my veins catching up to me.
"I did." She slides her hand over my hair in a soothing gesture. "What the hell happened?" She finally pulls back, her hands on my shoulders as she looks at me.
"I don't know," I answer truthfully. "I don't even know where Lisa came from. It was like she appeared out of thin air." I shake my head, trying to clear the fog. "Kai was being Kai, taking jabs at me just because he can. The next thing I know he's on the ground and Lisa is on top of him beating the hell out of him." Tears spill from my eyes, and I swipe at them angrily. "What's going to happen to her?"
"Lisa?" Rosé questions, continuing when I nod. "She's probably looking at a few days suspension at least. Probably won't be allowed to play in the next few games either. Man…" She blows out a breath.
"She won't be allowed to play?" I question, guilt knocking into me like a round of bullets hitting me in all the right places.
"Let's just wait and see, okay?" She drops her arm over my shoulder and leads me back toward the school. "Come on. I'll wait with you."
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"Are you fucking kidding me right now, Lalisa?" Her father's voice practically vibrates the office windows next to where Rosé and I are sitting.
I knew who he was the second he entered the room. Tall and broad, like Lisa, with edged features and the same medium blond hair. But unlike Lisa—whose eyes are kind and smile is easy—her father is hardened and stern.
I've been sitting here for the last thirty minutes waiting to find out what's going to happen. The second Lisa's dad walked in looking like he was ready to kill someone, I knew it was going to be bad. But I never expected to witness him talk to his daughter the way he is right now.
"Do you have any idea how bad this looks to colleges? You're not a fucking child. Why would you do something so stupid?"
In the entire time she's been in there, I have yet to hear Lisa say one word. Either her responses are quiet or she simply isn't answering, which one it is I'm not sure.
Rosé sits next to me, her hand wrapped around mine. She squeezes a little tighter every time Lisa's father speaks, like somehow that's going to make it better.
My stomach has been twisted in the same ugly knot since everything happened and seems to get harder and harder with each minute that passes.
I tried to talk to Ms. Shamin, the vice principal, to tell her what happened, but she wasn't interested in hearing what I had to say. According to her, Lisa attacked Kai unprovoked and would receive the punishment the principal felt appropriate.
Kai, though just as guilty in my mind, was in her office for less than three minutes before he was excused to go home. I didn't have to ask if he got into trouble too, I already knew he hadn't, which only makes this whole situation that much worse.
Lisa's in there right now getting screamed at and probably suspended—if not kicked off the football team—and here I sit, the one who's responsible for it all, helpless to do anything.
I jump when the office door swings open without warning and Mr. Manoban comes storming out, his pressed suit tight against his flexed shoulders. Lisa follows shortly after, her eyes widening when they land on my face. Clearly, she hadn't expected me to stay.
I stand, seconds away from saying something when Lisa gives her head a quick shake, as if to tell me not to, before following her father out of the office.
The pressure in my chest constricts my ability to breathe freely, and for a moment I struggle to pull in a breath.
"She's gonna be okay," Rosé says, standing next to me.
Flipping my gaze toward her, I manage to suck in a deep inhale and let it out slowly.
"Come on, let's get out of here. There's nothing more we can do here." She links her arm through mine and leads me out of the office without another word.
I wish we would've waited a few minutes longer because when I look up to see Lisa following her father down the empty hallway, her head lowered in defeat, I feel like someone has just hit me in the chest with a baseball bat.
It takes everything in me not to run to her. I want to tell her I'm sorry. I want to make sure she's okay. I want to pull her against me and tell her that nothing her father said is true. But I can't do any of those things at the risk of just making the situation worse.
So instead of going after them, I allow Rosé to lead me in the opposite direction where we exit on the other side of the building.
Jisoo pulls up to the curb just as we step outside into the warm afternoon sun. I look at Rosé who smiles reassuringly and tugs me toward the car. I don't have to ask, I know she must have text Jisoo and asked her to come back and get us. My two best friends are nothing if not dependable.
The ride home is a bit of a blur. I'm too worried about Lisa to really participate in the conversation. I only half listen to Rosé filling Jisoo in on what happened. I offer a yeah or a nod when asked but offer nothing more.
The five-minute drive feels like it takes forever and yet no time at all. All I want to do is call Lisa but I know that even if I do, she's not likely to answer.
"Jen, did you hear me?" I register Jisoo's voice, turning my head to where she's sitting next to me in the driver's seat.
"What?"
"Do you want us to come in for a while? Keep you company?" she repeats since clearly, I didn't hear her the first time.
"No, that's okay." I reach for the door handle. "I just wanna be alone right now if that's okay."
"Of course." She nods. "I'll talk to Jack, see if he hears anything. Let us know as soon as you talk to Lisa."
"I will," I agree, pushing the door open.
"And, Jen." Jisoo stops me before I even get one leg out of the car. "None of this is your fault. Kai had an ass beating coming. Don't beat yourself up over this like I know you probably will."
"Then why even tell me not to if you already know I'm going to?" I ask, feeling something other than dread and sadness for the first time since this whole situation spiraled out of control.
"Honestly, I have no freaking clue." She laughs. "Call me later, okay?"
"I will." I climb out of the car. "And thank you," I say, turning around just as Rosé climbs into the front seat.
"Anytime, you needy bitch." She gives me a wide smile, her normal demeanor slipping back into place.
That's one of the things I love the most about Rosé. She can be serious when she needs to be but as soon as the moment passes, she's back to her spitfire, crazy ass self.
"And you better call me, too," She calls after me through the open window as I turn to walk away.
"You know I will." I throw a half wave before jogging up to the front door and pushing my way inside.
The moment the lock latches behind me, I press my back to the door and let out a slow breath, fighting back the tears that once again threaten to spill.
"Jen." I hear my mom's voice seconds before she appears in the living room, concern taking over her face the second she sees me. "What happened? What's wrong?"
That's all it takes before I fall apart into a blubbering mess.
Mom jumps into action, quickly pulling me into her side and leading me to the couch. I should've known that one look at my mother and I would fall apart. She's always been the one person I can't hide my emotions from.
I spend the next half hour telling her everything that happened. By the time I'm done I expect her to tell me she doesn't want me seeing Lisa anymore, so what she says instead has my jaw almost hitting the floor.
"Sounds like Kai got what was coming to him."
"Mom!" I can't hide the shock from my voice.
"What? You don't agree?" She smiles, tucking my hair over my shoulder.
"I mean, I do. Obviously. But aren't you supposed to say something like— violence is never the answer, or nothing was ever solved from fighting or some other parental nonsense."
"Would it matter if I did?" She pulls me close, resting her head against mine. "Bottom line, Lisa was protecting my baby. And that will never be frowned upon in my book," she says, turning her face to kiss my temple.
"So you're not going to make me stop seeing her?" I question, turning to look at her.
"Make you stop seeing her?" She gawks. "I'd be more likely to award her with some kind of medal."
This pulls the first smile from me since I walked through the front door.
"Now stop procrastinating and invite that girl over for dinner. I think after today I should at least get to meet her already," she adds, bumping her shoulder against mine.
"You're a pretty perfect mom, you know that?"
"It's easy when you have a pretty perfect daughter." She smiles, abruptly standing from the couch. "Now go, text that girl and find out if everything is okay, and I'm gonna go order us some Chinese food before I have to get ready for work."
"Hey, Mom," I call just as she reaches the foyer, "thank you."
She offers nothing more than a nod and a warm smile, but it does so much to calm the earthquake inside of me.
It's not lost on me how lucky I am to have her. The thought once again brings Lisa to the forefront of my mind. The way her father spoke to her— the clearly dysfunctional dynamic of their relationship—it makes me sad to think that this is what she deals with on a daily basis.
My mom has never spoken to me the way her father did today. And while I don't remember much about my own father, I can't see him being the type of man who would do that either, otherwise, my mom never would've married him.
I don't know what I would do if I didn't have my mom to fall back on, which in turn makes me wonder—who does Lisa have?
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