Chapter five: Lily


Lily gripped the chair tightly, holding her breath as the footsteps approached. They grew closer and closer until they were right outside the door.

"Please go by." She prayed fervently. "Please, dear God let them go by."

However, they did not. The footsteps stopped outside the door. She held her breath and watched in mute horror as the doorknob turned. The creaked open slowly and Lily brought the chair above her head, ready to smash it over the head of whoever walked in the door. She begged God to still her heartbeat least the sound of it pounding in her chest give her away.

"Kate?"

"AHHH!" Katherine screamed and whirled around as Thomas Shelby burst into the cottage, gun drawn. His eyes darted around the room, while she gasped for air, her hands up in the air. "Mr. Shelby! You frightened me! Put that gun away."

He looked at her as if she were insane. "You screamed, so forgive me for thinking you were in danger."

"I'm sorry and you are forgiven." She waved him over to the typewriter. He holstered his gun and peered over her shoulder at her work. "I'm writing a scary scene, so I was millions of miles away when you called out."

He leans over her without saying a word, for once, the man finally smells of something other than cigarettes. He smelt of rich earth, pine trees and of horse, which to her nose was a lovely combination. He silently reads the page before asking her. "So, who's trying to kill her?"

"No spoilers for you Thomas Shelby." She stands up, being careful to avoid touching him. "Otherwise, you'll know everything going on in my next book."

"If I chose to read it." He glances at the title page. "I see you changed the name to 'the Lavender Cottage'."

She nods. "Yes, indeed. I'm assuming that you're here for the rent."

"That and to make sure that everything's alright. It's been 2 months since I saw you. You've been a reasonable tenant, paying promptly on the first."

She chuckles. "I assure you, I am alright. You're quite the reasonable landlord, coming down here to collect the rent and sparing me the walk up to your house."

"I was out for a ride. My horse needed the exercise."

"Hmm, now I know I was really lost in my thoughts." She handed him the envelope of money. "I didn't even hear you ride up."

The envelope is heavy, so he opens it to confirm she gave him the right amount. He frowns at the amount of money. "This appears to be money here for at least 3 months' rent."

"You're correct." She perches on the corner of her table. "You see I'm going to America tomorrow." His brow rises curiously. "My grandfather is ill and I hope I can make it in time to see him before he passes."

"Well, we shall have to have you join us for dinner when you return." He stated. "I was going to invite you for to join us for Christmas dinner tomorrow night, but, you'll be gone."

"That's kind of you," she stammered. "but, unnecessary."

"The kids bought you something while they were in town today," she stared at him in surprise. "and they wanted to give it to you."

"Oh." She stared at him in horror. "I feel horrible now. I didn't even think of buying them Christmas presents."

"That's not necessary."

"Why'd they even buy me a present?" She questioned. "I only met them once."

"You already brought them a present."

"Picture frames aren't even really a present. I know from experience, having lost my own mother 12 years ago, that most people often forget that children also lose someone that they love and cherish." She inhaled and quickly changed the subject. How did he always manage to get her to spill her guts about the past? She didn't want to relive it! "They should have something that they'd enjoy. They are children after all!"

He studies her for a moment before stating. "Well, it was Ruby's idea. I think she felt pretty guilty about her behavior towards you."

She exhaled deeply. "I hope you didn't punish her too severely on my account."

"She was reprimanded appropriately," he arched a brow. "she didn't get the hiding of her life, even though she deserved it."

"Thank you for mercifully sparing her. I can't imagine Christmas being that fun for them for them this year. I'll pick them up some souvenirs from America."

He shakes his head. "No."

"Why not?" She inquired. "It'll be fun for me and they'll have something that none of the other children will have."

"Kate, they only bought you chocolates," she scowled at him. "nothing to get excited about."

"And you," she swatted his arm. "just told me my present!" He caught her hand. "You could have waited for me to return before telling me."

"They'd have spoiled by then and why," he inquired. "is your finger bandaged?"

"I had a leak in the roof." He cocked a disproving brow. "So, I climbed up and hammered a tile into place. Cut my finger on a rusty nail, but, it'll be fine."

He glowered darkly at her. "I just had them replace the roof, it shouldn't be leaking."

"I'm sure it was an accident, one spot was missed. The rest of the roof works fine." she pulled her hand free. "It doesn't take much to hammer a tile down."

"Well, a woman shouldn't be atop of a roof hammering anything at all. You should have told me."

"I'll have you know Mr. Shelby, that I am no china doll. I was a nurse in the war," he straightened up. "so as you can imagine, I've seen, done and endured things that one would hardly expect a lady to have seen."

"You were a nurse in the war?" She nodded as he studied her. "Where were you stationed?"

"I was assigned to Edmonton Military hospital for several years. Then, I felt as if I could do more if I was actually near the men as they were being wounded. So, I signed up to become a nurse for field hospitals." She was silent for a moment. "I was transferred to the Verdun Military Hospital, which was the most….horrific experience. 303 days of fighting and so many men," she closed her eyes and exhaled. "I'll never forget it. God's seen fit to calm my soul, but he's never allowed my mind to forget."

"I was there." Kate jumped and turned towards him. "Wasn't wounded, but, I fought at Verdun."

"Mr. Shelby," she stated. "maybe that's where we met by chance. But, for the life of me, I can't remember meeting you. I barely got 5 hours sleep each day."

He nods. "It was bloody. And, it's possible that's where we may have met, but again, I can't remember any occasion that I had to talk to a nurse."

"If we're going to compare war stories to try to solve this mystery," she pats his leg as she moves past him. "I better make us a cup of tea."

He nods. "Sounds good to me."


That evening,


"And of course, once Matron found out that I was engaged to a German, she had me sent to Paris. She would have thrown me out completely, but they were short staffed on nurses. Luckily, the battle was over and most of the men were on the road to recovery. But once the head nurse there read the letter from Matron, I was sent back to England and I was dismissed. I tried to help out more, but…as you can imagine I was quite ostracized."

Kate took another sip of tea as Tommy took another puff of his cigarette. Kate's tales of her experience as a nurse had been rather entertaining. She was an open book, he could see that clear as day. She answered every question he put to her and she didn't show any signs of lying. She also knew many details that only someone who'd been there would know.

"You…are a fascinating woman, Katherine Carter." He honestly meant that. there was something about this woman that interested him. It had had been a long time since a woman had interested him this much.

"And you, where did you fight?" She inquired as she stirred her tea again, before taking a sip. "I know you mentioned Verdun, but they must have posted you other places as well."

"Yes." He takes another drag on his cigarette. "I was also at the battle of Somme and Mons." He paused a moment. "For Mons, I received the Military Medal, the Distinguished Conduct Medal and several other medals of honor."

"Which, I'm going to assume you threw them away?" she inquired.

"Aye." He frowned slightly. "What makes you suspect that?"

"Because you seem like the kind of man who hates to be reminded of something that you hate. Or," she leans forward. "you just leave them in a drawer, to pull out if needed, but they're not something you're real proud of. So, if you're not proud of it, you wouldn't keep it."

Sometimes, this woman could just see right through him. Her perception was unlike anything he'd witnessed. She, however, didn't have as good a poker face. Her face did a good attempt, but her eyes always reacted to whatever was said. "I threw them in the cut." She nodded. "And did you keep any of your mementos from the war?"

"A few." She stands up and heads into the other room. Thomas smiles, appreciating the quiet way she moved across the creaky floor. She moved lightly, as if a fairy were making sure her feet never touched the floor. She came back with a medium sized wooden chest from her bedroom. "They didn't let me keep my uniform, but I stole my armband." Even though she handed it to him, he hesitated in opening it. "Go ahead, it's not that personal." He opened it up to see that there really wasn't much inside. A photograph of her and her fellow nurses and a long lock of red hair taped to the back of the photo, which he picked up curiously. "A friend of mine, Anne McGrath, died of Influenza. I cut a lock of her hair before they burned her body. After my dismissal, I looked for her parents, to find out that they'd died. I kept it; I didn't have the heart to just destroy it."

He nods understandingly, remembering the bond he'd forged with his own men, especially Danny. He picked up a booklet, which caused her to inhale sharply. He stopped himself from opening it and put it back into the box. "Sorry."

"It's ok." She explained. "I just…I kept a log of the men I treated, those who died so I could help answer questions any family members had. That's just their names."

'I'll still respect it and stay out of it. I can tell it means something special to you." He then removed the bundle of letters, with a fraying green ribbon around them, setting them carefully off to the side. A quick glance, showed they'd been written to her by her fiancé, Emmett. Underneath the letters, was a picture of a young man, in a suit, with crutches tucked under his arms. He studied the photograph for a moment; the man had kind eyes and seemed harmless. He glanced at Kate, turning the photo towards her. "Your Emmett Webber, I'm assuming?"

Kate blinked once before nodding. "Yes, that was my Emmett." He could see in Kate's eyes that the pain in her heart was still as raw as if she'd lost him yesterday. He knew that feeling as well; he still hadn't gotten over Grace. She haunted him, determined to never let him go, but he didn't want her to release him. he knew that was part of the reason why his marriage with Lizzie failed. He couldn't love his current wife while he loved a ghost. Kate obviously felt the same way about Emmett.

"Tell me about him. How long did you two know each other?"

"Well, I knew him when we were children." She explained. "He'd been born with one leg shorter than the other, no one expected him to make it to adulthood. He was so sick all the time, but he was determined to live. As he grew older, he regained his strength and he wasn't as sickly." Someone knocked at the door, causing her to frown. "I wonder who that is."

"Were you expecting someone?"

She shakes her head as she stands and head towards the door. "No, I'm not."

"Wait there, let me get it Kate." He kept his hand near his gun as he opened the door. There was Polly, standing there with a disapproving look on her face. "What are you doing here?"

"I could ask you the same thing. It's late." She stated. "Almost 9:00."

"9:00?" Kate gasped as she jumped up and looked at her clock in horror. "I had a taxi service picking me up outside the gate two hours ago. And I haven't finished packing up to go! Darn it!"

"Go?" Polly inquired.

"She's going to America." He explained. He wasn't sure why Polly was being somewhat cold towards Kate, but he'd seen her levy that look at Grace in the beginning. "We were talking for a bit and forgot."

She nods; her demeanor tattles she wasn't pleased at finding him here with Kate. "Your horse got free and wandered back home. Everyone's been out looking for you. I figured you were down here."

Yes, he knew exactly what Polly was suggesting with that last statement. He decided to ignore her. "Did you bring the car?"

"Yes."

"Right," he walks to the table and grabs his hat. "I'm going to drive Polly back to the house. Then Kate, I'll give you a ride to wherever it is you're going tonight." She shook her head. "It's my fault that you missed your ride. It's the least I can do."

"You need to stay at home, it's Christmas Eve. I'll just use my motorbike."

Tommy laughed. "Not with that luggage you're not." She opened her mouth to protest, but he cut her off. "I'll be back soon, make sure that your bags are ready."

"You're a stubborn man, Thomas Shelby!" Kate called as he shut the door on her protests.

Thomas turned to Polly who a strict look on his face. This particular strict look confirmed that she didn't like what she saw. Whatever it was she saw, he wasn't seeing it. "She'll break your heart." Tommy didn't even bother to look at her. Polly, however, doesn't intend to let this go. "Your wife's not been dead more than a month and you're already f**king another-

"I am not f**king her." He bit out. "We were talking about the war and her time she spent as a nurse at the Verdun field hospital."

"The war?" Polly's face stilled. "Is that where you two met?"

"It's possible. I can't swear to it though. She's not hiding anything Poll, if I ask her a question; she answers it without dancing around."

"You've a habit of falling for women who lie." Thomas didn't answer her, but Polly was persistent. "I know that look in your eye Thomas Shelby. Don't think you can fool me!"

Thomas didn't answer that question right away, because to be honest, he wasn't sure what it was about her that made him enjoy her company. It was a mystery. Then, the answer came to his lips. "She understands."

Polly frowns. "Understands what?"

Thomas just went silent. None of them understood what he went through and what he'd lost. She understood, she'd lost the one she loved and she hadn't moved on. They were two sides of the same coin. She was just unbroken by the darkness and a part of him wanted to know how she'd managed that.