Chapter seventeen: Heads, we're dancing


"Promise me," Kate says as she prepares to take another swallow from her second glass of champagne. "that you won't take advantage of me, if I get drunk."

Thomas smirks as she takes a huge swallow. "I give you my word Kate. Besides, I'd rather you be sober for that."

"You're terrible." He eyes her as she sets down her glass and reaches for the brownie. She cuts the scoop of ice cream, takes half and places it on top. He smiles such an American thing for her to do. She takes a bite of the brownie and ice cream together. "Needs chocolate chunks in it."

"Why?"

She shrugs. "Just does. A girl likes extra chocolate during a stressful day." She cleared her throat. "You never said what you were doing in London, not that I am not pleased to see you."

"Some more business that you don't want to know about."

"Thank you very much for being so considerate to pop in. How'd you know where I was?" She leans forward slightly. "Do you have you men watching me?"

"Possibly." He smiles at her expression for a moment before sobering. Kate had been open with him, now; he thought he'd try to be honest with her. "The first time I met Grace," Kate's head shoots up; her wide eyes tattle that she wasn't expecting him to open up. She sets her dessert aside and reaches for her glass of champagne. "She was working in my pub, the Garrison. I asked her for a bottle of rum, and then inquired if she was a whore." Kate chokes on the champagne in surprise. He smiled faintly. "I also said if she wasn't, she was in the wrong place."

"How on earth did you persuade her to marry you?" Kate asked.

"Oh believe me, I can be very persuasive." He took a drink and paused for a moment. "She was working with a police inspector, hell bent on bringing me down."

"But she fell in love with you?"

"Yeah." He nodded. "She wanted me to go New York with her, start afresh. I couldn't leave everyone here, even though I did love her. She'd also lied to me. Therefore, I tossed a coin and she lost. Two years later, I find out that she's back in London, married to a rich banker. I don't know but…I just called her and she returned my call. We went out to dinner that night. I took her to meet Charlie Chaplin. We slept together and she got pregnant with Charlie." Kate smiles softly, deriving a conclusion. "She told her husband the truth and he hung himself."

He looked to her, as if expecting her to judge him. However, she couldn't judge him, especially after having known a love similar to that. A love that was so difficult to let go of that it was torture when it was taken away. "You two should have never been apart. We can't help who we fall in love with."

"We finally married and we had a few months together." He went silent for a moment as his mind traveled back in time to that day he'd cursed long and hard. "I bought her a sapphire necklace…I didn't know it'd been cursed by a gypsy." He took a drink. "She was shot that night and killed."

She placed a hand on his arm. "I'm sorry Thomas."

"She told me once, that she'd break my heart. I'd told her it was already broken. Losing her…made it break all over again." He exhales deeply. "It is good to talk with someone who knows that kind of loss."

She nods. "And with someone who respects the memories."

Thomas watches her as she takes another bite of the brownie. "You told me about how you nearly committed suicide that night on the docks. I never told you, about what was running through my head right when we met again. My gun went off, prematurely. I probably would have blown my brains out, had you not screamed."

Kate held his gaze. "I suspected that I had interrupted something of that nature, you looked upset."

"I think," he states as he leans over and strokes her arm. "that I owe you one more favor to balance the scales."

She smiles. "There are no favors when it comes to saving lives. I think that the scales are even."

"I'll decide that," he states as he runs his hand towards her face. "after I kiss you." And this time, she leans forward to meet him halfway.

For the first time, Kate enjoyed Thomas Shelby's touch without shame or bravado. Her heart pounded in her chest as he pulled her closer to him. She moved her hands towards his shoulders, holding onto him tightly as she decided to throw decorum to the wind for moment. She wasn't sure what it was, maybe it was telling him about the past that caused her to be a little bit more receptive to these feelings.

Thomas must have felt her resistance waver, for he swept her off her legs up onto the couch. Her heart pounded in her chest as he eased her into a position where she was lying partly on her back. She inhaled as the kisses became more intense and less gentle. She wasn't sure what had set this in motion; maybe it was the champagne. Her head spun as clung tightly to him, her fingers tightly gripped his coat lapels as he rearranged for her head to be on the armrest of the couch.

He hovered atop of her; his body was not completely touching hers until he was sure that she wasn't resisting him. Unconsciously, she parted her legs to allow him to get closer to her. Kate shuddered and bucked her body as she felt him atop of her. She inhaled sharply as he slid his other hand underneath her for support as he began moving against her center. Her hands stiffened on his shoulders for a moment as this burst of heat shot through her entire body. She let out a gasp as he pulled her upright so she was straddling him.

Her face flushed as she struggled to breathe, she could feel his breath on her face and his nose pressing against her cheek. He kissed her; her hands gripped his shoulders firmly as he gripped her hips through the fabric of her black velvet skirt. She shuddered as his right hand slowly slid under her skirt, causing her to inhale as she felt his hand on her bare skin. This was wrong, but as always with things that were wrong, it felt so good.

His left hand carefully traveled upwards towards her chest until it reached her breast. Kate let out several gasping breaths, only to cry out piteously as he dared to squeeze it through her blouse. The pain was unexpected, causing Kate to break the kiss. He stopped and looked at her, his breathing heavy. She glanced down at his hand on her breast, crimson flooding her cheeks.

How could she say that she wanted him to stop right now? What woman in their right mind would say such a thing? Thomas, was just…well, he was Thomas. He was a man and all of her senses were screaming that she was a woman. Hell, at this moment, her body was throbbing with a burning desire, which demanded that she throw propriety aside and just let him have his way with her. But she didn't want it to be a one time thing, she wanted more with Thomas.

She couldn't bear to look him in the eye. He crooked a finger under her chin, lifting her gaze up towards his. She held her breath as he studied her face carefully, before pressing a kiss on her nose, causing her to tremble. "I won't spoil you tonight Kate. I am planning on it though."

She exhaled in relief, words fleeing her for the moment. How could one man be so attractive and scary at the same time! She needed to get out of this room. It was too small and he was too much. Too many feelings were pelting her all at once and she needed to get out before she caved to their obvious wants. If he kissed her again, Kate wasn't sure she'd be able to resist him.

As if he sensed her thoughts, he moved her off his lap. "I better be going."

She inhaled and nodded in agreement. "Yes." When he stood up to reach for his coat, she undid a pearl button at the throat of her blouse. She was smothering to death!

As he pulled on his coat, he looked up at her. "Will I see you again before I go?"

"Of course." She smiled brightly. "I do enjoy your company."

He chuckled. "That's a first."

"It's your presence…I think. There's an eerie calmness about you that I like."

"Now, that," he declared with a laugh. "really is a first. I've gotten intimidating, but not calming." She followed him over to the door. He let himself out and stood in the hallway, his breathing still a little ragged. "So," he cleared his throat. "breakfast tomorrow?"

She nods. "Yes, that sounds delightful."

He studies her, his gaze still deathly intense. "Goodnight Kate."

"Goodnight Thomas." she smiles as she stands in the doorway, her hand on the door frame.

He studied her for a moment. "You really need to close that door Kate. I won't be responsible for what I'll do to you if you stay here a moment longer."

Her heart rate jumped up in her chest and she made a quick decision. "In that case, goodnight Thomas."

"Goodnight." And with that, she closes the door with an exhale and locks it. She leans her forehead against the door with a sigh.

She was glad that things hadn't gone the way they could have gone moments. She didn't want it to be a one-night thing. She wanted to be more than that to him. She wanted to be his wife and mother to his children. And the moment that thought crossed her mind, she couldn't deny it anymore. She was desperately in love with Thomas Michael Shelby.


He needed an ice cold shower. Damn, that woman was going to kill him before she caved in and let him have her. He wanted her with a passion, but he wanted Kate to want it just as bad as he did before he took her. When he had her, he didn't want her to look back on it with any regrets. The alcohol had probably attributed to her lapse in judgment, but still…

He exhaled, when he finally had her under him, she was going to be good. As he began removing his clothes, various thoughts began crossing his mind. Where exactly was he with Kate? Kate should have been married a long time ago. He could just see her, married with two children and heavily pregnant with his third.

His third? That fleeting thought stopped him in his tracks. He paused to reflect on his thoughts. With ruby and Charlie, Kate would already have two children. Once he got her pregnant, she'd have the third. Kate was practically already his wife.

Did he love her? Had he let go of Grace enough to commit completely to her? Had she let go of Emmett enough to love him completely? She might, her actions tonight had suggested that. He'd ask her once she returned to his estate. Tomorrow morning, he'd look at rings first thing before going back home where he'd give the matter far more thought. This was a third chance to try to find happiness, not many people had a third chance and he hoped that he didn't muck this one up.

First thing tomorrow, he was going out and buying her a f**king ring.


Kate nestled under a blanket on the couch. Her room was too drafty at the moment for her. She smiled as she reflected back on the moment of utter sensuality that had happened between them. Then Kate remembered that her breast had hurt when he'd touched it. With a frown, she touched her left breast, wondering it why it had hurt so when he squeezed it.

That's when she realized that there was a walnut sized lump in her breast.