Author's Corner
This ficlet was written for SessKagu Week 2022. The prompt for Day 5 was 'Fake Dating'. Cover art by DeviantArt user FanasY.
Disclaimer: Sesshoumaru and Kagura take more of a backseat in this one, and there is very little fake dating at all. To cut a long story short, inspiration took hold of me whilst I was writing so I just rolled with it lol! Enjoy!
LOVE AND MONSTERS
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"Sesshoumaru-sama is going to kill me."
Kohaku laughs as Rin paces back and forth restlessly. "I seriously doubt that," he says, whittling a piece of wood with his knife. "What did you even do?"
"I told Kazuto-kun that Sesshoumaru-sama was my father."
"That's not so bad. He is technically your guardian."
Rin stops pacing. She lowers her voice and whispers, "I might have also given him the impression that Kagura-san was my mother, and that they were married."
Kohaku's brows lift in surprise. "As hilarious as that is, why lie about it?"
Sighing, she plonks herself down on the cushion beside him and mutters, "Kazuto-kun has been so good to me. He's already risking his reputation by choosing to court a penniless country girl instead of a noblewoman. When he decides to make our relationship public knowledge, the least I can do is prove to his family that I come from a stable home with loving parents."
"And your solution to that problem was to say you're the adopted child of two high-ranking demons?"
"He doesn't know they're demons."
"Won't the pointed ears and unnaturally vibrant eyes sort of give it away?"
"Probably . . . I can be such an idiot sometimes."
Kohaku furrows his brow in thought. "This suitor of yours," he begins cautiously. "He sounds like a fairly reasonable man. Can't you just tell him the truth?"
"I wish I could, but not everyone has had such positive experiences with demons. We're lucky in that regard. Kazuto-kun's mother was killed by a demon. If he found out I was raised by one, I don't know how he'd react."
Kohaku's expression softens. "Still, I don't think you should lie to him. Your compassion for others regardless of their species is a big part of who you are. I'd hate for you to lose that whilst pretending to be something you're not."
Rin's stomach feels like it is full of butterflies. "I wish you wouldn't say things like that, Kohaku."
"Why?"
She struggles to come up with a suitable answer. He has to be aware of her feelings for him. He has grown into a fine young man who is not only ruggedly handsome, but also reliable to a fault. Once upon a time, he was all she could think about. Kagura used to tease her mercilessly for it every time she and Lord Sesshoumaru took a break from their travels in order to pay her a visit.
Before she can respond, Inuyasha's head appears in the doorway. "The bastard's here," he announces with feigned disgust. "He's waiting for you by the river."
Nodding, Rin rises to her feet. "I'll be right there."
She gives Kohaku a little wave and then jogs out of the hut to meet her guardian.
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"Inuyasha claims you have been spending a considerable amount of time with a boy, though he refuses to disclose the boy's identity to me."
Rin blushes at his bluntness. "It's true," she murmurs shyly.
Lord Sesshoumaru narrows his eyes in scrutiny. "Is it Kohaku?"
Her face turns from pink to crimson. "N-No! His name is Kazuto-kun. He's the son of a wealthy merchant. We met at the market last spring."
"I see."
The silence is painful.
"Is Kagura-san here, too?" she asks, trying to diffuse the tension.
He nods.
"Where is she?"
"She wished to deliver a gift to the monk's children. I told Jaken and Ah-Un to accompany her."
"Right . . ."
Lord Sesshoumaru studies her carefully. "Something is bothering you," he deduces finally. "Is it this Kazuto boy? If it is, you need only say the word and I will have him gelded within a moment's notice."
The absurdity of his threat shatters the terse atmosphere between them and makes her giggle. Once she has finished, she meets his flinty gaze and smiles helplessly. "It's not his fault," she says. "I did something stupid."
"Care to elaborate?"
"I told him that you and Kagura-san were my parents. My human parents."
He doesn't seem fazed in the slightest. "Why?" he asks curiously.
She gives him a simplified version of what she'd said to Kohaku. "I knew that if I told him the truth, it would make things complicated for us."
"Relationships are rarely simple, Rin. People are complicated by default. We pretend not to be, but we all have our flaws. To love someone is to know them completely, flaws and all. In order to achieve this, one must be able to see the entire picture as opposed to a mere fraction of it."
Her eyes widen a little. Dazed by his wisdom, the words come tumbling out of her mouth like a waterfall. "You're not angry with me?"
"Why would I be angry?"
"Because I lied. Not just about you and Kagura-san, but about myself, too. I thought you'd be disappointed in me for . . . for . . ."
Can't you just tell him the truth?
Emotion clogs her throat, preventing her from finishing. Fortunately, Lord Sesshoumaru has heard all that he needs to hear. "You believed I would scold you for not being true to yourself?"
She nods mutely.
His gaze shifts to the rushing river. "It is not my place to decide who you are or what you will become. The only one who knows the answer to that is you."
"What if I don't?"
"You will. I guarantee it."
A smile pulls at her lips. "Thank you, Sesshoumaru-sama. I'll bear that in mind going forwards."
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Kagura squeals excitedly as Rin bolts into her open arms. They ignore Jaken's commands to stop making such a racket and embrace each other tightly.
"I missed you," Rin murmurs into the sorceress' fine silks.
"Me too, kid," Kagura says, pressing her powdered cheek against the crown of Rin's head. "Did you get taller or are you wearing those crazy-high geta sandals again?"
"I'm not sure. Jaken-sama does seem shorter, though, so maybe I've had another growth spurt, after all."
"Or maybe he's shrinking," Kagura whispers in her ear. "It's a very common side-effect of getting old, you know."
"I heard that, you intolerable witch!" the imp screeches furiously.
Ah-Un snorts and potters over to rub its heads against Rin's waist. After scratching behind the dragon's ears, she returns her attention to Kagura, who is glowing with happiness. Ever since the Tenseiga revived her all those years ago, she has been making the most of her newfound freedom and autonomy.
Rin hopes she won't be too offended by all the lies she's told Kazuto whilst she and Lord Sesshoumaru have been away.
"Can I talk to you about something?" Rin asks.
Kagura shrugs. "Sure."
Rin leads her towards the village outskirts and sits on the grassy bank that gradually transitions into wilderness. The sorceress joins her on the slope, subtly admiring the patches of wildflowers that poke out of the long grass.
Rin recounts the past few months to her; from the day she met Kazuto all the way up to her recent exchanges with Kohaku and Lord Sesshoumaru.
Kagura bursts into maniacal laughter when Rin repeats Lord Sesshoumaru's wisdom regarding love and relationships. "He said all of that whilst keeping a straight face?" she wheezes. "Oh, that is too funny."
"I know, right? I thought he'd be furious with me. I didn't expect to get a life lesson instead."
Composing herself, Kagura rests her chin in her hand and shoots Rin a probing look. "There's one thing that's not clicking, though. It's probably nothing, but still . . . Why'd you include me in this make-believe scenario of yours? I get Sesshoumaru, but look at me. I'm not exactly mother material."
"Is anyone?" Rin counters. "Being a mother doesn't require a specific kind of personality. Anyone can be a mother."
"Not everyone is good at it, though."
"Not everyone, no. But I think you would be."
Kagura's cheeks darken slightly. "If you say so, kid."
"That's not the only reason I chose you," Rin carries on. "The truth is . . . I've been watching you and Sesshoumaru-sama for a while now. I've seen the way you look at him." Kagura averts her eyes. Rin places a hand on her knee and squeezes it lovingly. "What are you waiting for? He obviously returns your feelings, so why haven't you fessed up already? What are you so afraid of?"
"I could ask you the same question."
Rin's skin bristles defensively. "I don't know what you mean."
Kagura frowns. "Oh, come on, Rin. I'm sure the merchant's son is nice and all, but he's not the one you really want."
Tears prick Rin's eyes. "You don't know what you're talking about."
"Why do you insist on denying it? You're clearly still into him. Why won't you just be honest for once and—"
"Because he doesn't want me!" Her vision blurs and threatens to spill over. "Kohaku doesn't want me," she repeats quietly, gripping the hem of her yukata so tightly that her knuckles turn white. "It doesn't matter how I feel. In his eyes, I'm still just that stupid little girl who never knew when to shut up. I'm not good enough for him, Kagura-san. I'll never be good enough for him."
"Even if that were true, you can't make that decision for him," Kagura points out gently.
"He's made his lack of interest perfectly clear," grumbles Rin.
"He isn't the one sneaking around with a boy he met at the market. For all he knows, you were never interested in him to begin with."
Rin's pulse quickens at the revelation. She's never thought about it like that before. The more she mulls it over, the more sense it makes. What if Kagura is right? She has spent the past few years trying to suppress her feelings. It's entirely possible that Kohaku has absolutely no idea how she feels about him.
"What should I do?" she whispers, sounding small and childlike.
"Talk to him," replies Kagura. "Before it's too late."
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Interpreting her advice literally, Rin scrambles to her feet and bounds down the grassy slope towards the dirt trail. Kagura can't help but grin as she watches the young woman vigorously sprint in the opposite direction.
"The merchant's son will be devastated."
She turns and meets Sesshoumaru's amused stare. "I'm sure he'll get over it."
He offers her his hand wordlessly. Taking it, she allows herself to be tugged into his waiting arms. "Why didn't you tell her about us?"
"Her life can't always revolve around you, you know."
"You wound me, my love."
She leans in and lightly pecks his lips. "Are you sure this is a good idea? Aside from the demon-hating part, that Kazuto of hers seems decent enough. What if she's making a huge mistake? What if Kohaku doesn't want her, after all?"
"He does."
"How do you know?"
"Man's intuition."
She laughs. "May the gods help us all."
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Kohaku swears as the knife he is using to whittle with slips and nicks his thumb. He stuffs it into his mouth in an attempt to stop the bleeding, and wipes the flat edge of the knife on his kosode. The view of the sunrise is stunning from the branch he is perched upon, but the soft morning light fills him with regret.
It is his last day in the village. Tomorrow, he will depart for the northern reaches of the island, where he will remain for the next six or seven months. By the time he returns, Rin will most likely be married and expecting a child. The young man who is courting her sounds like quite the catch. According to Sango, he is considerate, hard-working, and rather easy on the eyes. When his father retires, he will inherit his trade, and Rin will want for nothing. It is what she deserves.
Lord Sesshoumaru will certainly be pleased with the match. Rin's potential future husband comes from a respectable family, and most importantly, his hands have never known the touch of blood. Not like Kohaku's have.
No future awaits her with him. Leaving is the best thing he can do for her.
"Kohaku! Where are you?"
He stiffens as his name slices through the branches. Sheathing his knife, he peers down through the gaps between the leaves and sees the object of his thoughts prowling the grassy turf below. He hastily shoves the carving he has been working on into his kosode and prays that she won't look up and see him there. Heat creeps into his cheeks as she continues her search, and he presses his back against the tree trunk as if asking to be swallowed by it.
Rin's face lights up when she spies him through the canopy. "Kohaku!" she shouts, waving her arms to seize his attention. "There you are! I've been looking everywhere for you!"
He blushes harder. "Is everything okay?"
"Uh-huh! Could you come down here? I have something to tell you."
Swallowing, Kohaku leaps out of the tree and lands with his knees slightly bent. Rin's eyes widen in unmistakable awe, but she bites her tongue to stop the praise from bursting out of her mouth like a song. That isn't like her. She isn't usually so reserved. Whatever she intends to tell him must be awfully serious.
"Kohaku . . ."
"Yeah?"
She staples her gaze to the ground. "Sango-sama says you're leaving soon."
He nods. "That's right."
"When?"
"Tomorrow morning."
"How long will you be away for?"
"About half a year, give or take."
Her face falls and she locks eyes with him again. "Why?"
He squirms uncomfortably. "Well, for starters, I need the money. And . . ."
"And?" she asks hopefully.
He stops squirming and sighs. "There's nothing for me here."
Sango has moved on, and the others are content to settle down and raise families of their own. There is no place for him in the village anymore, so the only option is to keep travelling in pursuit of a new home.
Rin inches closer. "What if there was?"
"But there isn't."
"There's me."
His chest burns with jealousy. "Not anymore there isn't. Any day now, sweet, determined, charming Kazuto will pop the question and you'll be—"
"I told him that we couldn't see each other anymore."
He baulks. "You did what?"
"It was unfair to keep stringing him along like that," she explains. "I spoke to him yesterday. Given the circumstances, he actually took it pretty well."
Kohaku is well and truly lost now. "I thought . . . I thought you loved him."
"I did. Just not in the way that I should have." She inhales sharply before adding, "Not the way I love you."
His breath hitches in disbelief. "You love me?"
She blinks slowly. "You didn't know."
It isn't a question, yet he answers it anyway. "I had no idea."
Her face colours and she averts her eyes once more. "Oh. I see."
"Why didn't you tell me this before?"
"I was afraid that it would spoil our friendship. I didn't want things to be awkward between us."
She might as well be crushing his heart with her bare hands. "Rin—"
"You don't have to say it back," she stammers frantically. "I just wanted you to know before you—"
Before he can talk himself out of it, he catches her face in his hands and kisses her. Initially, she flinches, unsure of how to react, before melting into him like gold that has been placed atop a furnace. Her movements are shy and timid – no doubt a by-product of her inexperience – but there is a passion behind the kiss that indicates she has been yearning for this for as long as he has.
"I love you, too," he says, breaking away to tell her that. "I always have."
He withdraws the piece of wood he has been whittling from within his robes and presents it to her as proof. She gasps as her eyes land on the carving, which depicts a wreath of gardenia flowers.
"It's for you," he clarifies. "Gardenias are your favourite, right? It was meant to be a goodbye present, but the last thing I want to do right now is leave."
"It's beautiful," she breathes.
"So are you."
It feels good to be able to say it out loud for a change.
She beams and reaches for him again, capturing his lips with her own. Kissing her isn't at all like he'd thought it would be. Somehow, it is so much better.
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