This Game Called Life
By: Bubbajack
Betas/Co-Authors: IcySnowSage, Heliosion, Loamy Coffee, Geoffry Lannister
Disclaimer: We do not own the following anime/mawha, comics, or tv shows or to the following: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Goblin Slayer, references to Highlander, Highschool DxD, How not to Summon the Demon Lord, I'm Really not the Evil God's Lacky, Overlord, references to Lord of the Rings, Percy Jackson, Solo Leveling, Solo Max Level Newbie, Star vs the Forces of Evil, or Wardstone Chronicles.
Ch.5: Malls and Mauls.
The Gilesmobile as it was dubbed by Xander, pulled into the mall parking lot and the group got out with the girls from the other world, looking especially excited. "That was so much fun, we were going so fast!" Theresa said giddily as she exited the machine.
"Speak for yourself," Morgana said shakily as she exited the car. "I never want to get in that demonic cart again."
"What is it with you intellectuals and calling things they don't understand, demonic? First, Giles with the computer, now you with cars. I swear," Xander said as he held a hand out for Elphaba who elegantly got out of the vehicle. "Thank you… Xander," She said, all smiles. "Now, shall we… head inside?" She asked, nodding to the building of steel and glass.
"Now that I think about it… how did we all fit in Giles' car?" Willow asked no one in particular.
Clearing his throat, the Englishman replied, "Actually, I enchanted my car to expand ever so slightly to have enough room for however many people need to fit in the backseat. It's rather complex expansion and spatial magic but I did some rather petty things with magic back in the day… keep that under your hats, savvy?"
"Did you do the same in the boot?" Xander asked.
"Yes… and I'm surprised you know the slang for that," Giles replied.
To which Xander said with pride, "I'm a Whovian G-man, I know more than you give me credit for."
Giles smiled a bit at that, "Well, you actually do have some taste Xander… now if you could just get some fashion sense to go along with your sense of television we might have half a chance of making a gentleman out of you yet."
"Don't worry… that's part of… why we're here…" Ellie said with a smile.
Xander looked nervous. "We're here to get you girls clothes, not me. I'm fine."
"Come on Mister Alexander Sir, it'll be fun," Theresa said, smiling at him warmly.
"Yes," Morgana drolled, "For all our sakes, shed that garish thing you call a shirt."
Haylee just shook her head, "I don't think it's that terrible."
"You have no dog in this fight, your idea of clothing is overalls," Morgana pointed out.
Looking down at her attire with her bust seemingly ready to burst out of said overalls at any second, Haylee questioned, "What's wrong with my overalls? They're useful when working on my farm." No one dared point out how some of her assets were straining her overalls.
Xander reached the door first and held it open for the ladies, and Giles. The girls' heads were on a swivel as they looked at all the shops contained in the building. Theresa in particular was intimidated by the sheer number of people present and grabbed the hem of Xander's shirt. Seeing this Xander told her, "Don't be nervous, we're just here to shop right?"
The petite blonde nodded, "Yes… it's just, this is all… so new, so different."
'Ah culture shock, I guess,' Xander surmised. 'Then again, going from a medieval fantasy world to my reality would have that effect. Me? I'm used to this shit… my God, I'm used to this shit…'
[Gained 1 wisdom for realizing you are traumatized and desensitized to the horror's of hell.]
'Very funny, oh Dark Master,' Xander replied. 'That reminds me, I can go back into dungeons right?'
[Correct, dungeons can be replayed, why do you ask?]
'I forgot to do something in the tutorial dungeon and need to go back and fix it,' Xander replied.
[To go back now, the dungeon would be repopulated with new monsters. Just so you know.]
"That's fine," Xander said to himself.
"What's fine, Mister Alexander Sir?" Theresa asked curiously as to who he was talking to.
Plastering a goofy smile on his face, he hastily replied, "Nothing, don't worry about it Theresa. Now, are you ready to shop till you drop, ladies?"
"I don't know if I want to stay in this bazaar that long, but I'm keen to take a look around," Morgana replied, before pointing, "That shop over there looks promising."
Looking to where she was pointing, Xander almost sputtered, "Victoria's Secret, of course you'd pick there first."
"I wonder what kind of arcane knowledge this Victoria holds?" the female wizard pondered aloud.
"How to get away with selling Chinese knockoffs for absurdly high value?" Xander said under his breath, "Umm, it's not what you think Morgana… but considering we're clothes shopping, we might as well start there, I guess?" sending Buffy a look he mouthed, 'kill me,'
"Oh c'mon Xan, most guys would kill to be in your position you know?" Buffy edged on while nudging him with her elbow.
Running a hand down his face, he deadpanned, "I am not most guys, chalk it up to me being treated like 'one of the girls'. I've become desensitized to this shit."
Buffy flinched at that. She often called Xander one of the girls but she didn't mean it quite like how he was taking it… "I… sorry I never meant…"
"It's fine… like I said, I'm used to it," He said with a sigh as he walked into the store.
'Well, that won't do,' Elphaba thought to herself as she followed them into the store.
Meanwhile…
Once inside Morgana tried to leave saying "This wasn't what I thought i-it was!"
But Xander stopped her by placing a hand on her shoulder. "It's fine, you girls need to get measured for underwear anyway so… yeah just follow the nice lady over there and she'll get you all sorted out," He pointed to the woman who was lingering not too far away, a smile practically glued to her face.
"They come in so many colors… Why do they come in so many colors?" Theresa asked as she was staring at a sky blue set of bra and panties.
"Personal choice I suppose," Xander replied with a shrug, "I never really thought about it."
"Umm Sir Alexander" Haylee said gently pulling at his sleeve. "I was told by that lady, I'm a 38I whatever that means."
"Big, it means you're big in the chest area… Congratulations I think?" The teen said halfheartedly. While wondering how she didn't suffer chronic back pain from such heavy knockers.
"Thanks, so now what?" Haylee asked.
"You look for something that says 38I that you like the look of," Xander replied, pointing over to some racks. "Start over there."
Haylee nodded and walked off, "Okay."
Soon after Morgana came up, asking "What's a 36DD?"
Thumbing behind him Xander replied, "It's your bra measurement, go look for something in that size over there near Haylee."
The Wizard started to do just that, only to stop and ask, "Did you uh, happen to hear what Haylee's measurement was?"
"Yeah?" Xander replied while looking around at what options there were for the girls,"Why?"
Clearing her throat, Morgana asked not so subtly, "I'm just curious… what was it?"
Actually looking at her, Xander said, cluelessly "What does it matter?"
"Will you just tell me please?" Morgana demanded politely but still.
Sighing, Xander replied, "She's a 38I, not that it matters. You're fine just the way you are, and so is she."
The girl blinked as her face slowly turned the color of her hair, "I… Thank you Alexander. I'll start looking now."
"Mister Alexander Sir doesn't understand women very well," Theresa giggled, "But it doesn't matter when he inadvertently says the right thing, I suppose."
"Huh? Did I miss something? Why was Morgana asking that?" He asked.
Taking pity on him Buffy said, "Female equivalent of male penis envy, Xan."
"Oh…oh…oh…" The teen said upon getting it. Looking over at the two girls who seemed to be getting along just fine he asked, "Um should I do something about this?"
"Like Theresa said, you already did, by accident," Buffy said, patting him on the shoulder, "Good job. Girls have self-esteem problems so you really helped Morgana there."
"If you say so, I was just being honest," Xander didn't really get it.
Buffy laughed, "I know, you big lug."
Then Elphaba walked up, asking, "What's a 40G?"
"Something big enough to poke someone's eye out," Buffy said, shaking her head at the absurdity, "Better yet, how is your back not hurting?"
Elphaba got a look of understanding on her face, "Oh my mother … taught me a … little spell. Helps keep … the girls… light."
"Teach me this, I beg you," Buffy said, completely serious.
"Maybe… later," The Witch said before telling Theresa, "She's ready… for you."
"Right, be right back," The blonde said. Before holding her head high and making her way to the back as if facing a mighty enemy. Xander thought it was cute.
"So yeah Ellie, just go look for something that fits," Xander told her. "Once you're done just bring it up front and I'll pay for it."
"Of course… Thank you for… this Alexander," She bent down and kissed him on the cheek before walking off.
Buffy nudged him in the shoulder, "Nice one, Xan."
"I should be thrilled and all but I just feel kinda numb… why?" questioned Xander.
[Head of Lead is negating all mental effects including seduction.]
'Umm, that's not good, it's basically turned me into a high functioning sociopath,' Xander pointed out. 'Can I… I dunno turn it off? Can you?' He asked Janus.
[Head of Lead is slowly breaking down. Due to your experience, emotion suppression is weakening. Be warned perk may evolve.]
'I can live with that,' Xander thought to himself. He turned when he felt Buffy and placed a hand on his shoulder. Seeing the worried look on her face, he asked, "Everything okay, Buff?"
"I should be asking you that. Are you okay Xan? You said you didn't feel anything when a woman even I will admit is hot kissed you. That is quite worrying," spoke Buffy worriedly looking over Xander.
Sighing he reassured his friend, "It'll be okay Buff, one of my skills prevents all forms of mental interference… including seduction."
"Oh… oh damn," Buffy muttered. "You're being turned into a Borg."
Looking surprised, Xander asked, "Buffy, Star Trek when?"
"A guilty pleasure from before we met, don't judge me," The petite blonde replied.
"A series that teaches philosophy, understanding, and the corruption of power should never be looked down upon. The Borg for example show how even those who follow a law may not be necessarily good," spoke Xander thinking of some dnd races that while not evil still held firm that their laws should be obeyed bar nothing."
To which the blond slowly nodded, "I mean… I mainly watched it because I thought Patrick Stewart was hot but yeah that too."
Xander chuckled, "Ah a Picard fan, a woman of taste, respect."
"Plus Spock had all the best lines," The Slayer added.
To that, Xander nodded sagely, "Live long, and prosper."
"The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few… or the one…" She finished morosely.
Having a feeling he knew what was on her mind, Xander asked, "Job got you down?"
Rubbing her shoulder the Slayer replied, unsurely, "Kind of? I mean what you said back at your base… I really could quit now couldn't I? I could have a normal life, if I wanted…"
Xander nodded, "You could, if you want. Sorry I didn't mean to be all insulting back there tensions were high and… yeah."
"It's fine, I get why you said what you said, I do complain about the Slayage a lot… but it's like if I stopped doing it, who would I be?" questioned Buffy as if she lost her purpose somewhat.
"That's the question every X-man ever has asked themselves. They're different, most didn't want their powers but got stuck with them anyways. The burden of the mighty is heavy when it comes to protecting the weak. You, like them, have two choices. You can choose to fight despite all the hardship that comes with it. Or you can choose not to fight. No one is going to blame you for choosing one or the other, but sooner or later you're going to have to choose to embrace these powers of yours or deny them outright," stated Xander wisely a he thought of all the trials and tribulations that Buffy may face in the future.
"What, no spiel about destiny?" Buffy asked wondering if she is going to hear the same thing Giles and her previous watcher told her.
"Fuck destiny and fate, I don't believe in them," Xander said with vehemence. "I believe we as humans make our own fates with our actions. Good or bad."
[Sisters Who Sew are interested in your statement. They find your interpretation of fate interesting.]
'If you are who I think you are, all I have to say is, bring it on,' The Teen thought.
Yet before he could really issue a challenge or a threat to the Sisters who Sew, Theresa returned, looking a bit glum. "What's wrong, Theresa?"
"I'm only a 32B… is that bad?" She asked.
"No… you're only fifteen, you're still growing," Xander reassured her.
"Want my advice?" Buffy whispered conspiratorially, "Eat lots of sweets and drink plenty of milk, the girls'll get bigger in no time."
Sending a suspicious glare towards Haylee, Theresa said, "That explains so much,"
Buffy laughed, "C'mon I'll help you shop."
"Women," Xander said to himself, "Can't live with em, can't live without em… speaking of, where'd Wills get to?"
Meanwhile…
"He just abandons me for a bunch of hussies Giles… it's… it's so unfair," Willow said, her tone something between fury and sadness.
"There there Willow," Giles said from within the confines of Barnes & Noble as he patted the girl awkwardly on the back. "There are plenty of fish in the sea and all that."
"Maybe," Willow sulked. "I mean I could deal with him not liking me, he obviously has a thing for Buffy, but for him to disappear and show up with three other women? It's just too much."
'Listening to your teenage drama is too much,' Giles thought to himself. "Willow, have you tried looking at this from Xander's perspective?"
"What do you mean?" Willow pouted, "He's just a boy, at his age boys only think with their other head,"
"Not always, and not Xander," The Watcher reprimanded. "Xander has been through a lot Willow. Though I didn't know him personally I've gotten the impression that the loss of your friend Jesse McNally has affected Xander deeply. That you and he are Xander's only real family… could you imagine if the two of you didn't work out? For Xander, that would be the loss of the last of his family."
"You're just taking his side because you're both men Giles!" Willow accused. "Neither of you could ever understand how I'm feeling!"
Giles rubbed his eyes, "Yes because a man has never had his heart broken by a woman before, most certainly."
"Exactly," stated Willow firmly as she started to look for some more risque literature to fit her growing mood.
'God, Janus, whomever may be listening, please kill me,' Giles begged. He didn't expect a screen to appear before him.
[Guardian of Knowledge is interested in your proposal? What are you willing to pay?]
"I was being facetious," Giles sighed.
[Guardian of Knowledge apologizes profusely for his blunder… would you perhaps like to make a deal anyway?]
"... last time I tried such a thing, it didn't end well for me," Giles muttered as he rubbed the back of his arm where a certain tattoo was placed.
[More like an exchange. I do not want your body but your knowledge. Guardian of Knowledge is lacking in information on demonology and would like to exchange information for information or a certain ability.]
"What kind of ability?" Giles politely inquired.
"Giles, who are you talking to?" Willow asked, annoyed at being ignored while holding a book to smack him with.
[Guardian of Knowledge snaps his fingers. Right, let's deal with the interloper first.]
Willow's eyes became unfocused and she said, "I'm going to go sit down for a bit Giles, I'm suddenly feeling a bit… tired."
"Yes, of course… I do hope," He said as he watched her stumble off, "That won't be permanent?"
[Guardian of Knowledge assures you it is temporary… besides, her complaining was getting on both of our nerves.]
"True, now, what're you offering?" The watcher asked tentatively.
["Knowledge from the Giant's Well: This skill is a permanent increase to wisdom and intelligence that is relevant to their stats in both attributes. This ability also allows the user to gain greater understanding of what is illusion and what is reality. Deception is hard if not impossible to trick the owner of this skill. However, the greater abilities of this skill require a cost. Truesight requires loss of sight or worsening vision. There is always a cost for knowledge and power and this skill is no exception."]
"Quite the double edged sword you're offering me…" Giles mused.
[Guardian of Knowledge will throw in the Archivist Class to sweeten the deal. The Archivist class would allow you to use magic as well as holy miracles.]
"Unless I miss my guess, holy magic can usually be used for buffing and curing status ailments like blindness and the like. Fine, I agree," Giles said at last.
Memories of long years of study under the Watcher's Council flashed before his eyes, and moments later, Giles felt a bit dizzy but otherwise fine.
[Guardian of Knowledge is troubled. Guardian of Knowledge is ashamed that such grand knowledge is hoarded and not shared with slayers and hunters against the invaders from beyond the plane. Guardian of Knowledge will add one additional boon to honor your sacrifice.]
[Granted perk Disciple of Wisdom: All skills or abilities based on Intelligence or Wisdom gain 200% experience.]
"That's very kind of you, thank you," The Englishman said kindly. He then glanced over at Willow who still looked out of it, "Now, what do I do about her?"
[Guardian of Knowledge pipes up, Might I suggest an exorcism… or therapy?]
Giles rubbed his tired eyes. "I don't want to know what you mean by that comment, do I?"
[You'll find out sooner or later… for your sake, I hope you're not around when she flips her lid.]
Running a hand through his hair the librarian sighed, "Great, as if living on a hellmouth wasn't enough, now we've got our own Regan Dennings to worry about." Walking over to the girl he gave her a light shake, hoping she'd be cognizant and not spin her head backwards and projectile vomit on him.
"Hmm, wha-happened?" Willow asked, coming awake.
To which Giles replied, "You tuckered yourself out with your worrying Willow. Then you sat down and nodded off for a bit."
"Oh, sorry Giles, but I do feel better getting that off my chest so to speak. Sorry you had to listen to all that," apologized Willow
The brit just rolled his eyes. "I was practically raised by my three aunts Willow, I'm used to it."
"Ah… I'm sorry," The redhead said sympathetically.
"Don't be. How about we go to the food court while we wait for the others? I've been hearing good things about this Cinnabon place and have been meaning to try it," offered Giles semi-helpfully.
Willow just stared at him blankly… "You've never had Cinnabon… we need to rectify this Giles! C'mon lets go… before Xander and his hussies show up and ruin my mood." She finished darkly.
'I'm beginning to think something may be very wrong with Willow,' Giles thought as he allowed himself to be led away and shown the glory of pastries.
Meanwhile…
Xander was finally leaving Victoria's Secret and, being the gentleman he was, he was carrying all the woman's bags. 'I'm so glad to finally be out of there,' He thought with a sigh as he all but fell into a booth. Putting her hand on his forehead to feel his temperature, Theresa said worriedly, "You don't have a fever… Are you okay Mister Alexander Sir? You seem rather fatigued," The blonde priestess said worriedly.
To which Buffy laughed a little and reassured her, "Oh he's fine, it's just kind of considered taboo for men to go into that store is all. So it was rather stressful for him."
"Hmph!" Morgana sighed, "What a silly notion, it's just clothes. We're still covered."
Hiding a smile behind her hand, Ellie looked at the Slayer pointedly while saying, "Perhaps some… food and rest… would do us all… some good?"
Taking the hint Buffy stood and nodded, "Good idea… what do you all want?"
Throwing a Benjamin her way Xander said, "I could go for a Whopper with cheese, bacon, and a Hershey pie."
Theresa asked, "What's a Whopper?"
Xander replied in a near emotionless tone, such was his malaise, "It's a sandwich consisting of a nice bun, a beef patty, mayonnaise, lettuce, tomato, pickles, ketchup, and sliced onion. On request, it can also have cheese, bacon, mustard, guacamole, or jalapeño peppers."
"I'll take one of those Whoppers with cheese and bacon," Haylee asked.
"One… regular Whopper… please," stated Elphaba.
"Hold the pickles but add cheese on mine," Morgana replied.
"Can I have one of those too? With everything on it?" Theresa asked kindly, seeing everyone looking at her, she asked "What?"
"Theresa…" Morgana said, sighing, "That's a bit much isn't it? Plus, it would be a mess."
Yet the priestess was adamant, "I know what I want, thank you."
"Hey, a sandwich being messy is what makes it taste good," Xander defended. "Let her do what she wants."
Preening victoriously Theresa added, "Could I also get one of those pies Mister Alexander talked about? What's a Hershey's?"
"Chocolate cream pie," Xander replied while rubbing his eyes.
"What?!" All the girls said. "But… chocolate is something for the rich… isn't it?" Morgana asked.
"Maybe back home for you guys, but here, it's easily affordable. Pie for everyone Buff," Xander commanded with sarcastic majesty coloring his tone.
Shaking her head bemusedly at Xander's Gal Pal's actions, the Slayer walked off saying "Sure Xan."
"So yeah clothes next after we eat?" Xander asked.
"And we can get dresses?" Theresa confirmed. "We don't have to dress like men do we?"
Chuckling, Xander nodded, "Yes Theresa you can get dresses."
The priestess beamed, only for her face to become aghast when a drink was suddenly spilled on her hero's head. Xander felt a chill run down his head and back and through his hair as someone spilled a soda 'Coke, diet coke,' he thought as he tasted some rivlets running down his face. Sighing heavily to control his mounting anger, Xander turned to face the person in question.
He found Cordelia Chase looming above him smirking. "What happened Cordy, did you trip or something?"
The Queen Bee of Sunnydale High smirked evilly, "Opps, guess so. Sorry didn't see you there Harris."
"Yeah, I'll bet you didn't… excuse me ladies I need to go get cleaned up," Xander said as he stood and excused himself.
"You do that… we'll take care…of this girl," Ellie said, eyes narrowing in Cordelia's direction.
As he marched off to the bathroom he heard the telltale sound of high heels on tile clicking behind him and just as he entered the men's room he was followed behind by a certain blonde immortal. "Xander, sugga? You alright?"
"Harmony," Xander greeted as he pulled off his Hawaiian shirt and rang it out in the sink. "Cordy is in maximum bitch mode today huh?"
"She was ranting and ravin like a hornet hive darlin' all buzzed up and ornery wonderin how the Cretin King managed to surround himself with pretty gals… not that any of them were prettier than her of course," replied Harmony matter of factly while she withheld a giggle.
Xander snorted when he heard that, "No Lord forbid Cordelia let her vanity and pride take a hit by admitting someone is actually better looking than her." Holding up his shirt and seeing it was a lost cause, he threw it in the trash leaving him in his stained tee shirt. He looked into the mirror at the worried blonde. "Relax, I'm fine Harm."
Pursing her lips and pouting cutely, the blonde replied, "Physically I'm sure you are… it's mentally and emotionally that I'm worried about sugga."
Splashing water on his face to remove the sticky contrails the pop left behind, Xander replied, "I've had worse done to me than soda poured on me in public Harmony,"
To which the blonde shook her head, "If that was supposed to be reassuring it wasn't sugga."
Turning around, Xander just shrugged, "Not reassuring, just telling the truth."
Harmony took a moment to enjoy the view such as it was. 'A year of vampire hunting has done wonders for mister Harris' physique,' She noted seeing how he now had muscles where before were layers of fat on his arms, his tank top too, she bet was hiding a sculpted torso.. 'Harmony Kendall what're you thinking!' She chastised herself. 'He's a mortal, you can't be thinking things like… like that, about him… It wouldn't end well.'
"Hey everything okay?" he asked concernedly. "I noticed you checking me out for a moment, thanks for the confidence boost by the way, then you kinda got sullen."
[+1 Charisma for being physically attractive, +1 to Wisdom for noticing something was wrong with Miss Kendall] Janus informed him doing his Dungeon Master duties.
The debutante deftly deflected saying, "There's nothing you need to worry about . Rather, where did those ladies come from?"
Leaning back casually against the sink, he reminded her, "I already told you Harmony, it's Xander."
She gave a weak smile, "So you did Alexander, but as to my inquiry?"
Rolling his eyes, the teen sighed, "I guess that'll do. As for your question, I've been clearing dungeons and one of them led me to another world… that's where they come from."
Harmony blinked for a moment before nodding along as if she just heard the weather, "I see."
He expected disbelief, an argument, for her to call him a liar or to ask if he'd hit his head… the last thing he expected was acceptance. "You… believe me? Just like that?"
To which Harmony smirked as she curled an eyebrow, saying, "Sugga, I'm an immortal remember? I've seen and done more than most people. If you say those ladies of yours are from another realm, whoever am I to argue? Especially in light of recent events?"
The two suddenly heard a feminine scream of rage. "Was that…?" Xander began.
"Miss Chase? I do believe so," Harmony replied as she rushed out of the bathroom with Xander hot on her heels.
The scene the two returned to was comical to them at least. Cordelia's shopping bags seemed to have mysteriously been set alight, and she was pissed.
"You… I don't know how but you did this!" She said, voice full of wrath as she pointed an accusing finger at Ellie.
"Prove it… brat," Ellie said as she contentedly smoked her pipe which was mysteriously not producing smoke.
Stomping her heeled boot on the tile floor, Cordelia petulantly replied, "I you… you'll pay for this! Somehow, some way, you'll pay!"
"That's my cue, till next we meet Alexander. Bye Bye sugga," Harmony whispered into his ear before falling into formation with the rest of the Cordettes as they stalked off.
"Well… looks like you ladies aren't the only ones in need of new clothes," Xander said after the Cordettes left in a huff.
"Well with us around, you will at least end up in something better than that garish motley," Morgana mused.
The girls laughed as Xander playfully groused, "Yeah yeah, Xander up until recently was poor and had to make due with his uncle's outdated fashion sense."
Buffy grimaced as she mentally told herself, 'Get Xan something nice for Christmas,' She said, "Well, look at it this way, you can dress however you want now. Eat your food and then we'll work on getting you a decent wardrobe, okay?"
"Thanks Buff…" As he tucked into his food he paused to ask, "Are we cool? I know things were tense back at my place so… thought I'd ask."
The Slayer looked away embarrassed, "We're fine, I was just super worried about you. We hadn't heard from you in days. That's a bad sign in this town Xan, you know that… as for the whole not needing to be the Slayer thing… let's be honest even if I tried to stop, do you think the universe would get the memo?"
Sighing, Xander replied, "No probably not. But that doesn't mean you can't have backup."
"Damn straight, and I'll start appreciating it a whole lot more… sorry about that," the faux-blonde said, swallowing her pride and accepting she would need help.
"No problem," Xander then laughed as he saw the Picasso painting Theresa had made of her face with all the condiments she had on her burger, her cheeks puffed out like a chipmunk as she attempted to inhale her food. "Theresa you've got something on your face," Picking up a napkin he proceeded to clean her up.
"Sowwy. Tank yoo Mista Aleksanda Sher," The Priestess said, blushing through a mouthful of food.
Even as Buffy smiled at the tender moment she was kicking herself. 'I was so blind I couldn't see such a great guy right in front of me. Wow Summers you really screwed the pooch on this one. I don't even think he realizes these girls have got it bad. It's funny that only now I realize how great a guy Xander is, only now that I can't have him… But I can still be his Best Female Friend. That's something right?'
Had Buffy been able to see screens she would've seen the following message.
[+5 to Wisdom, +2 to Strength and Gain the following Perk: Comdaderie: When on the field with someone you trust your stats are doubled. If that person falls in combat, your stats become halved.]
Meanwhile…
As Harmony walked in the back of the pack of Cordelia's clique known as the Cordettes to Xander, she found herself wishing she had the latter's [observe] skill as she watched Cordelia inflict what seemed to be actual physical pain with her mocking jibes towards people she didn't like. 'It is likely a skill of her class but I've no idea how she's doing that,' She thought as she observed the Queen B of Sunnydale High seemingly inflict physical pain on a member of the AV Club with a few well placed jibes. 'If Alexander were here, he would be able to tell her path.'
Sighing as she watched the poor fool run off, Aura, another member of the clique heard her and turned looking concerned, "Harm, everything okay?"
Putting on her best stupid blonde valley girl impression with practiced ease, the immortal replied, "Like, yeah everything's totes fine Aura… It's just… everything is weird now isn't it? I like, I mean weirder than usual since Halloween right?"
Aura Monroe was one of the more sensible of the Cordettes. She figured early on it was better to be on Cordelia's side then be in her way, plus she found it easier to curb some of her more… negative personality traits if she was actually willing to listen to her. She viewed herself as the big sister of the Cordettes and she'd always felt there was something off about Harmony Kendall. Nothing bad from what she could tell, it was just that every once in a while she'd become introspective, she'd get this deep pensive look on her face, and she'd give off an air of someone two or three times her age. To Aura Harmony was a puzzle. One she hoped to figure out some day.
"You mean the video game thing right?" Aura said in low tones.
The blonde nodded. "Yeah that, also the fact that a majority of people are going around pretending nothing is wrong is well rather queer isn't it?"
'There is it again,' Aura noted, 'The facade just dropped' Aura made note of it but decided to say nothing, "Yeah, but you know how this town is Harm. People get killed by 'Gangs on PCP' and with 'barbecue forks' all while mysteriously drained of blood."
Harmony looked at her eyes wide, "Aura are you saying you…?"
The African girl just rolled her eyes, "Vampires are a thing? Duh," She replied, "It's the only logical answer… as illogical as it sounds," She then glanced at Cordelia who was looking more haughty than usual. "But back to the current weirdness, I think it's going to Cordelia's head."
"You don't say?" Harmony replied, "Whatever could've given you that idea Aura? Was it her being more vindictive than usual, her actually enjoying the pain and suffering of others, or her having more barbs than a hornets nest to her retorts?"
'She did it again,' Aura noted 'Little bit of southern drawl that time. Harmony the Southern Bell?' She wondered. Before she heard Cordelia call out to a pair of somewhat handsome looking guys.
"You two! Come here and carry my bags!"
The two boys went glassy-eyed and shuffled over like the living dead to carry the clothes she had to buy twice because one of Xander's new lady friends decided she was being a bitch and set them on fire.
"I can't believe that fake tittied bitch did that!" Cordelia raved. "She set my new outfit on fire! Mean, who even does that?"
'Who mentally enthralls people and makes them carry her bags?' Both Harmony and Aura thought at the same time while sharing a worried look.
"Cordy, sweetie," Aura began, "You kinda just mindfucked those two boys into carrying your bags hun."
"Hmm?" Cordelia said before noticing what she said and laughing a little, "Aura this isn't any different than what we always do. It's just feminine wiles."
"Cordelia, like… one of them is drooling… they've like, never done that when you used your feminine wiles on them," Harmony said as she picked up a napkin and dabbed at the poor sobs' chin.
Yet the Queen Bee just smirked, "Clearly you've never watched carefully as I've walked passed some guys in the lunchroom Harm," When neither girl laughed, she just shrugged, "Look, it's not like I'm hurting them girls I'm just… borrowing them for muscle for a bit."
Again the two girls shared a look and grimaced. "This is kinda sketchy Cordy." Aura said after a moment as one of the other girls took a black marker out of her purse and started drawing on his face while the other's giggled.
Cordelia just waved them off, "It's harmless, you two worry too much," Turning to the others she said, "Pass me the marker."
[Heartbreaking Beauty is interested in your usage of feminine wiles! Care to barter for a blessing?]
Cordelia's smile could only grow wider at the news.
(...)
Word Count: 5,832 Number of pages: 15 Date Completed: 7/7/2022
(...)
AN: Welcome everyone to Chapter Five of This Game Called Life. Snowy and I hope you all enjoyed it. Just so you know, you won't be finding out Buffy's stats under Xander uses [observe] on her in the story. That is how we are handling other characters. We will hint at things with them, but you will only know what Xander knows when it comes to other characters.
Good Lord Almighty I am hurting. Bubba takes forever to make decisions. I finally got him to finish this chapter. Look forward to other chapters being posted soon. He is burning midnight oil after wailing in agony and pain. He does good work though.
Cram it Snowy I don't pay you to complain! I don't pay you at all! Probably should… ah well. What do I look like I'm running? An asian sweatshop? The answer is no, cause I'm not paying you, now get back to work! Or no rice with your meal!
No, not the rice! It's the only form of carbs you give me! I can't survive off beef jerky and beer!
You can and you will if you don't get back to work! Seriously, how's a trailer park Buddhist like myself supposed to attain enlightenment around here, when all you do is complain about the food Snowy? Hunger is an illusion! Anyway, we do hope you all enjoyed and till next time everyone, this has been an Icysnowsage and Bubbajack production! Peace!